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Born Again [[Aaron and Harold are laying in the grass, looking up at red leaved trees.]] / Aaron: I've had a change of heart. I now believe in God. / Harold: So you've accepted His love and realized we're all here to serve His higher purpose? / Aaron: I needed someone to blame for everything that's wrong with...
Edumacation Harold: Thomas Jefferson said that the *key* to democracy is having an *educated public* that can make informed decisions. / TV interviewer: Governor, what steps would *you* take to alleviate the current sub-prime mortgage crisis? / Gov. Palin: We'll fix it for *Joe six pack* and *hockey moms!* We're...
Red Lenses Ferdinand: You're a pretty good artist. Do you think you could draw *anything*? / Harold: More of less I guess. / Ferdinand: Okay, then draw *red* / [[ silence ]] / Harold: *I'm holding a #2 pencil!* / Ferdinand: Excuses, excuses.
The Media Aaron: The media is in the *unique* position to ask presidential candidates questions to better inform voters. Instead reporters just *pander* to them. / Aaron: There are so many competing news outlets that they're afraid a candidate will choose a competitor. / Harold: C'mon, it's not *that* bad. / TV...
Working for a Living, Part 1 [[Alp and Harold are standing in Alp's lab.]] / Harold: The *classifieds?! / Alp: My invention supplies are *low*, so I need some *cash*. / Alp: Working for a living is going to *suck*! / Harold: What about the *American Dream* of building success through one's own hard work? / Aaron: Maybe you didn't...
 
Working for a Living, Part 2 [[Harold and Alp are walking through the forest.]] / Harold: How's your job hunt going? / Alp: Terrible! / Alp: I got a job as a band teller, but they fired me the *first day.* / Harold: Really? How hard can it be to process deposits and withdrawals? / Alp: I fell victim to what's probably a *common*...
Working for a Living, Part 3 [[Alp is sitting at the dining room table reading the paper when Harold walks up.]] / Harold: Alp, you still don't have work? / Alp: well, I got a job at the Gap, but they let me go. / Harold: What happened? / Alp: Apparently they don't like their employees to be honest to their customers. / [[Alp is...
Working for a Living, Part 4 Alp: My interview for the engineering position didn't work out. / Harold: Really? Given your background with inventions I figured you'd be *perfectly* suited. / Alp: Yeah, but they required an *advanced degree* for consideration. / Alp: I tried to fool them, but *somehow* they caught on. / {{ alt text:...
Working for a Living, Part 5 [[Harold and Alp are looking at a computer]] / Harold: Looking for jobs on the internet? / Alp: Nope! My money troubles are over! I'm ready to start inventing again! / Harold: What?! Just last week you were broke and desperate for work! / Alp: But that was before I got this email from a Nigerian prince....
That Ain't No Honey [[Ferdinand sees a beehive]] / Ferdinand: Yum... honey! / [[Ferdinand throws a rock at it.]] / [[Ferdinand is chased by bees. Next panel shows Ferdinand watching TV with Aaron, with a puffy face]] / Ferdinand: Guess what? If you throw rocks at a beehive, you're goin' to get stung! / Aaron: Some people...
 
Designer Shirt Ferdinand: How do like my new $300 designer shirt? / Aaron: Do you realize you could have fed an entire African village with that? / Ferdinand: The villagers eat fabric?
Don't Get Too Comfy [[Aaron and Harold are walking along a perilous looking bridge.]] / Harold: It's such a strange and foreign sensation ... / Harold: ... the election is getting near and I'm not even dreading it ... / Harold: ... I actually feel a glimmer of hope and optimism ... / [[Aaron holds Harold back from walking...
Conflicting Principles [[Harold and Ferdinand reading newspapers at the table]] / Harold: Even with a deficit and a dangerously widening poverty gap, conservatives want tax cuts for the wealthy. / Ferdinand: You bet! The government can't tell us what to do with our money! / Harold: And with a crisis of sick and uninsured patients,...
Tomorrow's Election Day [[Harold and Ferdinand walk through the woods. There are weird rock formations with red-leaved trees.]] / Harold: Tomorrow's election day! There's a lot of important stuff to vote on this year. / Harold: Have you been informed on all the key issues? / Ferdinand: Yes, I read plenty of bumper stickers. / [[Harold...
Where's the Change? [[Ferdinand and Harold watch the news]] / Ferdinand: Okay, where's all this change I've been hearing so much about? / TV: It's an honor to be elected president. / Harold: Obama still needs to be sworn in on Jan 20th! / Ferdinand: I knew those campaign promises were too good to be true!
 
Old People [[Alp and Ferdinand are walking trough the archtypical countryside at sunset]] / Ferdinand: Alp, have you ever noticed that it seems like old people grow SMALLER? / Alp: Yup, They're like SHRINKY DINKS! / Alp: It's a REAL EFFECT Ferd. Loss of bone density with age plus the constant strain of gravity causes...
Headphones Harold: Aaron, why do you always wear headphones? Aaron? / Harold: Can you hear me Aaron? Aaron?! / [[Harold leaves]] / Harold: Never mind. / Aaron: Exactly.
Bumper Sticker [[Aaron stands watching Ferdinand put a sticker on his car that reads Obama '08]] / Aaron: What are you doin'? / Ferdinand: Putting a bumper sticker on my car. / Aaron: What?! The election ended over a week ago! / Ferdinand: I like to be on the winning side.
Agnostic [[Harold and Aaron are sitting at the foot of a tree on a mild autumn day. Harold is sitting up with his hands on his knees, and Aaron is relaxing with his arms behind his head.]] / Harold: Some people fanatically believe in God and all that implies... / Harold: ...atheists fervently contend that God...
Names Aaron: I'm terrible at remembering names. What can I do to improve? / Harold: Look into that person's eyes and take who they are to heart. By realizing what makes them special you will have a unique reminder to associate with their name. / Aaron: Never mind then.
 
Cooperation [[Ferdinand and Alp sit fishing on an island]] / Ferdinand: Have you ever seen those little birds that pick the crocodile's teeth? / Alp: Yup, the Egyptian Clover. Their chirps also alert the crocodiles of impending danger. / Ferdinand: A beautiful example of a symbiotic relationship. / Alp: You bet. It's...
Fight [[Harold and Aaron sit on a bench hanging from a tree. Harold reads a newspaper.]] / Aaron: Every day, all we do is fight. Fight traffic, fight the crowds, fight our neighbors, and fight our families. / Harold: And after all that pointless fighting, we all die. / Aaron: Hey, don't try to cheer me up.
Boundaries Broken [[Harold and Aaron walk in the forest at nighttime]] / Harold: Have you ever heard of the phrase "breaking the fourth wall" when discussing comic strips? / [[They both walk across a bridge]] / Aaron: Sure, that's when the comic characters are actually aware that they exist within the confines of a comic. / Harold:...
Utopia Tree [[Harold and Aaron are sitting at the base of a tree.]] / Harold: Can you imagine a world without religion? / [[The camera pans back to show that the tree leaves are bright red on this autumn day, and the sun is setting in the background.]] / Aaron: Or as I like to call it... heaven on earth.
Light as a Feather [[Harold and Alp are standing on top of a tall building. The sun is setting in the background.]] / Harold: Wow, what a long way down. / Alp: People look like ants from up here. / Harold: Imagine jumping from here. Free-fall must be an amazing sensation. / Harold: You're light as a feather, with the weight...
 
It Came from the Drain, Part 1 [[Harold and Alp in the kitchen, Alp pouring something down the drain.]] / Harold: Alp, *What* are you doing? / Alp: Disposing of old bacon grease. / Harold: *Jeez*, how much bacon do you *eat?* / Alp: You know, *the usual*. Bacon omelets, BLTs, bacon cheese dip, bacon on salad, on my potato, chocolate...
It Came from the Drain, Part 2 [[Harold and Alp in the kitchen, Alp pouring something down the drain.]] / Harold: Alp, you *can't* just dump *toxic waste* from your experiments down the *drain!* / Alp: *Great!* Just *another* example of liberals trying to stifle the innovative *American* spirit! I'm trying to invent things that...
It Came from the Drain, Part 3 [[Harold and Alp watching TV.]] / Alp: Watching TV is *great!* It's like reading *without* literacy. / [[A greenish something appears over Alp's shoulder.]] / Alp: Hey Harold, I know we're *friends*, but it's a little *creepy* when you slobber your *tongue* on my face. / Harold: Alp, I would *never*...
It Came from the Drain, Part 4 [[A gelatinous mound of sludge and garbage rears it's "head"...]] / blob: BRARRR!! / Alp: This is definitely *not* spiffy! / Harold: *See Alp!* I told you not to dump all your *garbage* down the *sink!*... / Harold: ... Now the *toxic chemicals* from your experiments and the *old food* have reacted together...
It Came from the Drain, Part 5 [[The blob has Alp in its clutches!]] / blob: ROARRRRR!! / Alp: Harold! / Harold: Alp! / Harold: *Stop! That thing's taking Alp! Help! Anyone help!* / Harold: Wow, I can't believe that Alp's gone. / Harold: After all these years of wishing he was out of my hair, that was surprisingly unsatisfying.
 

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