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Out There - Monday, January 12, 2009 Rod: Completely turned-off, huh? Ah well, I guess I blew *that* one, eh? / Araceli: I can’t believe you’re so blasé about it. / Rod: Ari, dear, the sky is filled with stars! You gotta point your telescope at more than one! / Araceli: Interesting analogy. / Araceli: If *I* had been that close to something with Sherry, I’d have been *devastated* if I screwed it up. / Rod: That’s your problem, babe. You can’t see the universe for the galaxy. / Araceli: Analogy getting less interesting, more corny. More wine, please.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090112.html
Out There - Tuesday, January 13, 2009 Rod: So, what about the redhead? Seems like there was promise there, huh? / Araceli: We’ve been though this, Rodney. Mir and I are just friends. / Rod: I meant for *me,* counselor. Is it promising for *me.* / Araceli: Oh. Heh. I dunno, maybe. / Rod: See, you need to be more like *me,* Ar. I screw up one possibility, and move right on to the next. The law of averages rewards my persistence. / Araceli: You’re more self-confident than me. For me, each rejection would take its toll. / Rod: So pay the toll, babe! But get on the damn *turnpike* already!
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090113.html
Out There - Wednesday, January 14, 2009 Rod: Miriam… yes, she’s quite ravishing, isn’t she? More beautiful than Sherry even, in my opinion. / Araceli: You say that *now.* After Sherry washes her hands of you. / Rod: Well, Sherry seemed like a real *challenge.* I figure I might as well attempt the difficult task first, and then move onto the sure thing. Best case scenario, I win twice. Worst case, a most enjoyable consolation prize. / [[Araceli, looking annoyed, stares at Rod]] / Rod: Oh, you probably shouldn’t tell either one of them I said that. / Araceli: This seems like an excellent time to discuss my raise.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090114.html
Out There - Thursday, January 15, 2009 Araceli: I really like Miriam, Rod. *And* Sherry. If you hurt either one of them, I’d be *really* mad at you. / Rod: Don’t worry, hon. I’d never risk not having *you* on my good side. / [[Rod motions towards the couch, Araceli, looking irritated with arms folded, looks at him]] / [[Rod and Araceli have moved to the couch, Rod’s arm around her]] / Rod: We should be married, Ar. Why the hell did we break up? We’re so good together. / Araceli: Uh, I think you remember why. / Rod: A wife who prefers my secretary to me? I could have *worse* problems. / Araceli: Actually, she’s a little butch for me. But I kinda like the new intern.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090115.html
Out There - Friday, January 16, 2009 Rod: The way *I* see it, I’m probably going to end up with someone who’s going to eventually think “I married *this* creep? What was I *thinking?*” / Rod: Now *you* would have the good taste to leave me for something *tasty* like *Sherry* or *Miriam.* Which I could *respect,* as well as *appreciate.* / Rod: But I’m probably going to catch *my* wife cheating on me with some *guy.* Ick! Where’s the upside in that for *me?* / Araceli: I don’t think there’s *supposed* to be an upside for *you* when your wife cheats on you. / Rod: Well, it’s a lousy deal, then. The wedding’s off!
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090116.html
 
Out There - Saturday, January 17, 2009 Rod: Hoo boy, too much wine. I should call a cab… unless… / Araceli: Unless you want to sleep on the couch? Do you think I’d ever kick my best friend out into the cold? / Rod: I wasn’t really thinking “couch.” / Araceli: We’re such good friends, Rod. Don’t you think we should do everything we can to keep it that way? / Rod: Everything we can and *then* some, my dear. / Rod: Funny how a lot of women are attracted to me until they get to know me. You’re *not* attracted to me, but you know me well and *like* me. / Araceli: There’s no accounting for taste, luv. Lucky for you, mine is *lousy.*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090117.html
Out There - Monday, January 19, 2009 Clayton: No kidding? You own “The Port”? Why would you be drinking *here?* / “Port” Owner: Well, I can’t spend my whole life at the “office,” can I? / “Port” Owner: Anyway, I’m always on the lookout for new talent. Like your bartender here—she’s a knockout. / Clayton: Miriam? Yeah, she’s all right. / Clayton: But she’s also the most narcissistic person I’ve ever known. So I’m not sure she’s what you’re looking for. / “Port” Owner: Have you ever *been* to “The Port?” The stage has wall-to-wall *mirrors.* / Clayton: Oh, right. She’ll be perfect.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090119.html
Out There - Tuesday, January 20, 2009 Clayton: See, the problem with Miriam is, she gets hit on *all the time.* / “Port” Owner: Oh, she doesn’t like that? / Clayton: Are you kidding? She *loves* it. Except, she’s heard all the lines. You go up there with your strip club story, she probably won’t buy it. / Clayton: She *may* think you’re legit if *I* introduce you—which I’ll gladly do for a small fee. / “Port” Owner: Ah, gotcha. Will a few passes to the club do? / Clayton: Uh, well, actually, I was just hoping you’d buy me a shot. But we can make it five shots if you think it’s worth *that.* / “Port” Owner: Two shots of whatever for my friend here! Uh, Miriam, was it?
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090120.html
Out There - Wednesday, January 21, 2009 “Port” Owner: You *sure* you’re not interested? You’re a very pretty girl—you could make a lot more money than you do *here.* / Miriam: I’m sure I *could.* But money isn’t everything. / “Port” Owner: You know, it’s not much different than what you do *here*—I see you flirting with all the guys, the only difference is— / Miriam: That I’m wearing clothes, yeah, I know. / “Port” Owner: Look it’s just not for me, okay? I don’t mean any disrespect to your girls, I just think there are some things you share with the world, and some things you only share with someone special, okay? / Miriam: By the way, you’re *really* good-looking. You doing anything later tonight? / “Port” Owner: Oh, yeah. Going home to my wife. Sorry.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090121.html
Out There - Thursday, January 22, 2009 Miriam [[thinking]]: Nice going, Miriam, get a %#@& grip, you just hit on a married man. / Miriam [[thinking]]: Of course, I didn’t *know* he was married, and it’s not like I continued to pursue it after he told me he was. / Miriam [[thinking]]: On the other hand, I *did* know he was a sleazy, creepy owner of a sleazy, creepy nudie bar and *that* didn’t deter me from hitting on him… good one there, Mir…) / Miriam: Oh, I’m sorry, did you still want something? / “Port” Owner: Yeah, to pay for my drink. You *sure* you don’t want to try stripping? You’re a *lousy* bartender.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090122.html
 
Out There - Friday, January 23, 2009 Miriam [[yelling]]: What the hell was *that* all about, Clayton? What exactly are you trying to pull? / Miriam [[yelling]]: Are you trying to get rid of me or something? What gives you the idea I’d want to be a *stripper?* / Miriam [[in Clayton’s face, yelling]]: I’d *never* leave this place to work at some creepy nudie bar!Well, it isn’t gonna happen! I *like* it here! I like my *boss,* I like the *clientele,* I even like *you,* you *@#%$!* / Miriam [[on all fours on top of bar in front of Clayton, yelling]]: So *screw you, Clayton!* I’m staying *right here! I’m not a stripper!* / Clayton: Right. Got it. Not a stripper. Now, what do I owe you for the table dance?
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090123.html
Out There - Saturday, January 24, 2009 [[Miriam is sitting on the bar, turned somewhat away from Clayton. Her arms are folded and she looks furious.]] / Clayton: I just thought you’d *consider* stripping, I wasn’t trying to get *rid* of you. Anyway, don’t you think *these* losers would flock to see you do *that?* / Clayton: Hell, I’m sure *I* would. / [[Miriam and Clayton look at each other out of the corners of their eyes]] / [[Miriam and Clayton perform Hollywood-style “grope n’ kiss”]]
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090124.html
Out There - Monday, January 26, 2009 Miriam [[sitting in Clayton’s lap]]: Um… wow. *That* was certainly spontaneous… / Clayton: Yeah, I’ve heard women *like* that. / Miriam: Well, *this* one does. But now everyone’s staring at us. / Clayton: Haven’t noticed. But I’m not really looking at them. / Miriam: Maybe we should let go of each other. / Clayton: Okay. / Miriam: Uh… letting go means *loosening* your grip.]] / Clayton: Semantics.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090126.html
Out There - Tuesday, January 27, 2009 Miriam: I don’t think I’ve ever *considered* you before, Clayton, because I know you like Sherry. / Miriam: But *she’s* not really the issue, so what I *should* be asking is how you feel about *me,* not *her.* / Miriam: Clayton? / Clayton: Sorry, I’m just trying to think of the best way not to completely blow this. / Miriam: Take your time. I’m off at two.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090127.html
Out There - Wednesday, January 28, 2009 Miriam: I’ve been somewhat attracted to you ever since I read your writings. Maybe that’s weird, but take it or leave it. / Miriam: I’d drag you upstairs right *now,* but I *can’t*—I’m stuck here until 2:00. / Clayton: It’s for the best, Miriam. We shouldn’t jump into something like this. We should take the time to make a mature, responsible decision about what our nest step should be. / Miriam: We’ve got about an hour and a half. / Clayton: Well, then we better get crackin’.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090128.html
 
Out There - Thursday, January 29, 2009 [[Sherry sitting on couch in bathrobe, reading newspaper and drinking coffee; Clayton sneaking out door behind her]] / [[Sherry quickly looking behind her; door Clayton left through is closed]] / [[Sherry resumes reading paper, with slightly puzzled/apprehensive look]] / [[Sherry jerks head up, eyes wide, as she drops newspaper and cup of coffee]]
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090129.html
Out There - Friday, January 30, 2009 [[Sherry knocking on Miriam’s bedroom door, with dazed look on face]] / Miriam [[through door]]: Wha—? what’s going on? / Sherry: Miriam, can I talk to you for a second? / Miriam [[in bed, half-awake, holding head]]: Can it wait, Sherry? I’ve got the worst hangover of my *life* right now! / Sherry [[thinking]]: Well, I should *hope* so—but *still!* / Miriam: I also had a *dream* you would not *believe!*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090130.html
Out There - Saturday, January 31, 2009 Miriam [[emerging from room, wrapped in a sheet]]: So, uh, I guess I ought to have a talk with Clayton. / Sherry: I can’t believe this.. / Sherry: What you do and who you do it with is your own business, but *Clayton?* What were you *thinking?* / Miriam [[making way towards couch]]: Actually, I’m not sure we did very much. Because I think I would have remembered if— / Miriam: Owww. / Sherry: What? / Miriam: For some reason it really hurts when I sit down. / Sherry [[running away with hands over ears]]: Uh, *shopping!* I forgot I have to go *shopping!*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090131.html
Out There - Monday, February 2, 2009 Miriam: I hate to tell you this, Clayton, but I don’t really remember much of what happened last night. / Miriam: I remember us making out, and I remember you trying to carry me upstairs. I’m sure *that* was a sight. / Clayton: You remember everything then. We went to sleep after that. / Miriam: Really? We got all the way to my bedroom, and then we just *slept?* / Clayton: Yup. / Miriam: And the bruises? / Clayton: I think I might have dropped you a couple of times. Sorry.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090202.html
Out There - Tuesday, February 3, 2009 Miriam: We went to bed together, and we just slept. That’s kind of funny, huh? / Clayton: It’s a riot. / Miriam: I’m sorry, Clayton, I probably gave you the impression you were in for a memorable night, and instead you only got to watch me pass out. / Miriam: It’s probably just as well, because you and me? Probably not a great idea. But i still feel like I owe you an apology for a disappointing evening. / Clayton: Well, I *slept* pretty good. You have a comfortable bed. / Miriam: It’s sturdy, too. Not that *that* makes any difference.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090203.html
 
Out There - Wednesday, February 4, 2009 Miriam: One thing I don’t understand is why you left so early this morning. We still coulda— / Clayton: I didn’t want to disturb Sherry. / Miriam: We wouldn’t have disturbed her, she sleeps very—wait a second, *that’s* not the real reason, it’s because you *like* her, isn’t it? / Miriam: Wow. / Miriam: Hon, you traded a “sure thing” for a “not a chance in hell.” / Clayton: you don’t reach *my* lofty position in life without choosing *that* poorly fairly *often.*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090204.html
Out There - Thursday, February 5, 2009 Miriam: In the last couple of years, Sherry’s gotten old and boring, and I’ve stayed young and fun. *Her* version of this would be *She* got smart and mature, and *I* stayed dumb and irresponsible. / Miriam: I suppose the truth is somewhere in between. Suffice to say, Sherry used to be a lot like you and me, but she’s decided she doesn’t *want* to be like you and me. / Miriam: That’s the reason Sherry’s never going to go for you. Because you remind her of all the things she hates about herself. / Clayton: Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. / Miriam: I won’t. I’ll hate you because you’re so *girly.*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090205.html
Out There - Friday, February 6, 2009 James: So Red—what’s up? The rumor mill has it that you left my man Clayton here high and dry last night. / Miriam: Not the case, James. It was actually more the other way around. And high we may have been, but dry we were *not.* / James: Wait, hold it up—*he* turned *you* down? Oh, man why wasn’t I *here?* I *needed* to see *that!* / Miriam: Turns out he only has perpetually bloodshot eyes for one girl, and it ain’t *me.* / James: Dude, where’s your *head?* *Aspirations* are *fine,* but sometimes it’s right to just *settle.* / Miriam: Oh, James, you sweet-talker, you. / Clayton: Is it happy hour yet?
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090206.html
Out There - Saturday, February 7, 2009 Miriam: I’m actually pretty impressed, Clayton. You chose not to take advantage of a drunk girl, and you were true to your heart, however misguided its longings may be. / Miriam: So, even though we’ll be putting this episode behind us, you’ve earned my respect. I hope that’s important to you. / Clayton: It is. / [[Clayton watches Miriam bend over to pick up a bottle from a shelf]] / [[Clayton smashes beer bottle over his head]]
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090207.html
Out There - Monday, February 9, 2009 [[Miriam is cutting Sherry’s hair]]Sherry: I’m sorry, Mir… but *Clayton?* To say that you can do better than *that* is to understate the point *immensely.* / Miriam: Sherry, what is it you don’t like about him? / Sherry: He’s a drunk, he’s a loser, he’s selfish… take your pick, Mir. / [[Silence, Sherry looking at Miriam out of the corner of her eye]] / Miriam: —But you like *me…* / Sherry: Yeah, but if you had the goofy moustache *too,* it might be a deal-breaker.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090209.html
 
Out There - Tuesday, February 10, 2009 [[Miriam is blow-drying Sherry’s hair]] Miriam: I wish I could be more like you, Sher. You seem to *relish* being alone. / Sherry: It’s not that, Mir, I’d just rather be alone than jump into something for the wrong reason, or with the wrong person. / Sherry: Anyway, it’s not that bad being alone. There are ways to ease the boredom or loneliness. / Miriam: Yeah, I discovered those ways when I was about 12 years old. But I’m a big girl now, I have *big girl* desires. / Sherry: …and *little girl* patience.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090210.html
Out There - Wednesday, February 11, 2009 [[Miriam is applying some gel or solution to Sherry’s hair]] Sherry: Y’know, Mir, if you focused on some of your other interests, you wouldn’t even *notice* you’re alone. / Miriam: What other interests? / Sherry: I dunno, what about poker? You’re so good at it, maybe you should be playing more. / Miriam: There are no casinos around here, and playing online is boring. / [[Miriam is looking at Sherry out of the corner of her eye]] / Miriam: You’re trying to figure out if I *have* any other interests, aren’t you? / Sherry: You’re pretty good at *smoking,* but there’s no real future in *that.*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090211.html
Out There - Thursday, February 12, 2009 [[Sherry is in the shower, Miriam is seated, talking to her]] Miriam: Remember when we first met, Sherry? You used to drink and smoke and party with the best of us. What happened? / Sherry: I dunno, adulthood? / Miriam: Certainly you’re not suggesting you can’t grow up and still have a good time. / Sherry: ’Course not, but you don’t have to have fun *all the time.* / Sherry: Plus, what constitutes “having fun” can change. I didn’t stop doing some of those things because they’re *bad* for me—they also got *boring.* / Miriam: So growing up is really just changing your position on the issue of what’s boring? / Sherry: Yeah, just pretend you’re campaigning for some office. And you just saw some startling poll results.
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090212.html
Out There - Friday, February 13, 2009 [[Sherry is blow-drying her now-blonde hair]] Miriam: It’s going to be difficult to maintain your current solitary lifestyle soon, Sher. You’re going to look unbelievably hot now, if I may say so. / Sherry: I thought I was hot *before,* Mir. That’s what you’re always telling me. You haven’t been *lying* to me, have you? / Miriam: Well, you were what was previously believed to be the hottest someone could get, until new findings indicated heretofore unheard of levels of hotness. / Sherry: Will I have to wear special clothes to keep from burning people? / Miriam: I *was* going to suggest handing out shades and sunblock, but once you get *that* close to ’em, they’re *done.*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090213.html
Out There - Saturday, February 14, 2009 [[Sherry is inspecting her new hairstyle in the mirror]] Sherry: You did a great job, Mir… I owe you a pizza or a pat on the head or something. / Miriam: Or something. ’Twas my pleasure. / Sherry: By the way, I’m working with you tonight. Expect a big crowd. / Miriam: Really? What’s the occasion? / Sherry: Steven’s doing a solo acoustic show. / Miriam: At *our* bar? Why didn’t you *tell* me? / Sherry: Because I can only handle about an hour’s worth of this kind of reaction. And we’re starting work in an hour. / Miriam [[yelling]]: *What* kind of reaction? *What kind of reaction?*
http://outtherecomic.com/d/20090214.html
 

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