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Anywhere But Here - Monday, May 1, 2006 The Dude: Chris, I chose to have sex with her. We had sex for a few hours. / / [[Flashback, Mandy lies on top of the Dude as he lights a cigarette]] / The Dude: And after she got her cookie I lit up a fag and she said... / / Mandy: God, you were incredible. / / The Dude: Well good, does this mean...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, May 2, 2006 [[Back in the bathtub]] / / Chris: When you say "a few hours" just how long are we talking about? / / The Dude: <> / / The Dude: I don't know ... counting foreplay, probably like ... four ... ish. It's not like I made a point to time it. / / The Dude: What? / Chris: I ... I just ... WOOF / The...
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, May 3, 2006 [[The Dude's narration here is in the background as Chris just stares at him with a dreamy look on her face]] / / The Dude: Look, it's not like I was really into it. I was tired, I didn't want to be there. And she just kept pushing. After a little be I just figured that the only way I'ld get some...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, May 4, 2006 Chris: Well, it sounds like you two had a good time... / / The Dude: Actually, that's ... uh ... well honestly. / / Chris: Oh come on! You're telling me that after four hours... / / The Dude: What's the big deal about four frigging hours anyway? I mean you figure a good hour of foreplay and... / / Chris:...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, May 5, 2006 The Dude: Look, four hours may sound like something mind-blowing, but honestly it just ... / / Chris: Oh come on, after something like that, you weren't screaming like a rhesus monkey? / / The Dude: Honestly Chris ... / / The Dude: It was probably the most boring thing I ever did in my life.
 
Anywhere But Here - Monday, May 8, 2006 The Dude: We finished up, she got her biscuit, and I could finally get some sleep. / / The Dude: But I wound up just laying there for awhile. Trying to sleep, / / The Dude: But one thing just kept running through my head. / / The Dude: That's :explitive deleted:ing it?!? What a crock of HORSE :EXPLITIVE...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, May 9, 2006 [[Bathtub]] / Chris: OK, well, I've never heard a guy react THAT way after his first time. / / The Dude: Honestly, I didn't expect my reaction to be like that either. In the movies they do the dirty and the guy's like ... / / {{scene from There's Something About Mary}} / Dom: These pipes ... ARE CLEAN!!! / / The...
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, May 10, 2006 [[Bathtub]] / Chris: So you had bad sex your first time. What's the big deal about that? / / Chris: I mean, I was twelve when I lost my virginity. He was done in under a minute. / / Chris: But it got better after that ... maybe you just need a new perspective on how everything works. / / The Dude:...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, May 11, 2006 [[Still in the bathtub]] / Chris: So, how many partners HAVE you had? / / The Dude: Counting Mandy? Only two. And she ... uh ... just two. / / Chris: Ohhhh ... kay. / / The Dude: Yep. / / <> / / The Dude: <> / / <> / / The...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, May 12, 2006 [[In a cafe, Dude reading at a table]] / The Dude: {{narrating}} So about a week after the whole Mandy thing. / / [[from behind the Dude]] / Steph: Hey there hipster, that seat taken? / / The Dude: {{narrating}} I was a lot warmer to Steph. / / The Dude: Go right the :explitive deleted: ahead. / Steph:...
 
Anywhere But Here - Monday, May 15, 2006 [[In the bathtub...]] / Dude: I knew from the start that it just wouldn't work between us. / Dude: And yet I still persued it... / [[Outside, a beautiful rainy day in vibrant color. Steph jumps and skips along the hills, completely dry despite the heavy rain.]] / Steph: April showers... bring May flowers!!! / Dude...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 The Dude: To be honest, I don't think I was ever attracted to her. Most of the time, I couldn't even stand to be around her. / / Chris: So why did you date her? / / The Dude: Because ... Because it was nice to be wanted. It was nice to just have someone to care about. / / The Dude: And the fact...
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 The Dude: It's just that I feel like an idiot. I feel like I've done some really stupid things because of sex. And it's not easy for me to just shut it off. / / [[In the mental plane]] / Brain: HOLD HIM DOWN!!! / Heart: I'M TRYING! I'M TRYING!! / / [[back in reality]] / The Dude: But at the same time,...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, May 18, 2006 The Dude: Do you know what I want? I want someone I can feel absolutely comfortable with. I want the magic that you feel when someone just feels "right." I want something ... something deeper. / / The Dude: Sex just feels ... cold ... empty ... animalistic. / / The Dude: And that's not what I want,...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, May 19, 2006 Chris: So, Let me see if I understand all of this. The reason why we haven't had sex isn't because you're a virgin, / / Chris: or because you were taken advantage of ... or because your first time was crap ... / / Chris: The reason we haven't had sex is you want to "find" something "deeper." / / Chris:...
 
Anywhere But Here - Monday, May 22, 2006 The Dude: What, I--no, that's not it at all ... I mean, I just ... / / The Dude: When we were first ... up till, I mean, it wasn't until / / The Dude: Look, yeah, for the longest time I just couldn't figure out ... But then ... / The Dude: God, why is it that whenever I try and explain this I feel...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 The Dude: God, why does this... why can't... ROUGH!!!! / / The Dude: Look, I'm not feeling that tactful, right now. So I'm just going to talk. / Chris: Knock yourself out. / / The Dude: It's not that I didn't think that you were... / / The Dude: No... / / The Dude: Chris, I hate it here. / / The...
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 The Dude: Chris, I wasn't with Steph because I wanted sex. I just hated being alone. / / The Dude: It just felt so good just to ... just to be wanted. / / The Dude: We had NOTHING in common. NOTHING. / / The Dude: And I hate that I did that. I knew what I was doing, and I just didn't care. / / The...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, May 25, 2006 The Dude: I, uh... / / The Dude: I haven't been in a serious relationship with someone for almost two years. / / The Dude: And it's not as if I wasn't trying... / / The Dude: At first I'd just go on dates, but there would always be something wrong with them... and then, for like a year... I just gave...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, May 26, 2006 The Dude: No, not at all. / / The Dude: Chris, you were... / / The Dude: You were completely unexpected. / / The Dude: I mean I got home that night and the next thing I know we're sucking face. / / The Dude: I kinda figured that you like me, and I was a bit attracted to you. / / Chris: Just a "bit"? / / The...
 
Anywhere But Here - Monday, May 29, 2006 The Dude: You know, I think I didn't smile for almost two full years. / / Chris: Well, what was your goddamn problem? / / The Dude: I donno... / / The Dude: Maybe I was just getting in touch with my inner emo. / / Chris: Oh please! / / Chris: You're the least emo person I've ever known. / The Dude:...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 The Dude: So... / Chris: So... / / Chris: We get to have sex now? Right? / / Chris: Oh COME ON! / / Chris: WHAT... ARE YOU FRIGGING CATHOLIC OR SOMETHING?!? / / The Dude: No. / / The Dude: I mean I was... but now I'm more of a Buddhist. / Chris: Is this EVER going to end?!?
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 The Dude: Chris, it's not that... / / The Dude: I mean I want to ... but ... / / Chris: shhhh... / / Chris: ok. / / The Dude: Oh ... kay? / / Chris: Ok. / / Chris: Look, clearly you have issues. And I know something about "issues." / / Chris: And if you're not comfortable, I don't want you to...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, June 1, 2006 [[shower curtain drawn back]] / C1: NO SEX IN THE BATH TUB!!! / Chris: Oh-kay! / C1 [confused]: OK? / Chris: A-OK! / [[The Dude furiously nodding with thumbs-up sign]] / C1 [borderline bewildered]: Oh...allrighty then. / [[lights switch off]] / The Dude: So...do you want to fool around? / Chris: It's about time...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, June 2, 2006 [[Chris and the Dude drift off to sleep in the bathtub]] / [[Chris enters dreamland, comfortable in the Dude's arms]] / [[There is a shadowy figure in a hat and serape lighting a cigarette]] / [[Chris is in dreamland, pondering the scene]] / [[The shadowy figure turns and walks into darkness]] / [[Chris...
 
Anywhere But Here - Monday, June 5, 2006 [[Mary asleep in bed. Uncle Jay wakes her with a slap on the ass.]] / <> / Uncle Jay: Rise and shine sweet cheeks... / / Mary: <> What time is it? / Uncle Jay: About six thirty. / / Uncle Jay: The kids got locked out last night, I'm going to run and pick them up. / Mary: Go right ahead...
Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, June 6, 2006 Beth: Hey, I think your dad is here. / Dude: My dad? / Beth: I think it's your dad. / [[Uncle Jay appears, staring at Dude and Chris in tub]] / Uncle Jay: I am so very disappointed in you. / Beth: Why, they behaved themselves. / Uncle Jay: And that's what disappoints me.
Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, June 7, 2006 Dude: Thanks for driving over here.But how did you know we were here? / Uncle Jay: Kid... you'd be amazed what us old farts can figure out with caller ID and a wireless connection to Mapquest. / Dude: Well, I appreciate you coming to pick us up / Uncle Jay: No problem... / Dude (off-panel): Now can...
Anywhere But Here - Thursday, June 8, 2006 The Dude: Thanks again for picking us up. / Uncle Jay: No problem, kid. / / Uncle Jay: Are you sure you don't want me to drive her home? / The Dude: Nah, now that we've got our stuff I'm sure we can fend for ourselves. / Uncle Jay: Suit yourselves. / / The Dude: Besides, I think Chris could use a little...
Anywhere But Here - Friday, June 9, 2006 The Dude: Look, last night... I don't know what happened to you... I know it must have been some pretty heavy crap for you to start crying like that... / / The Dude: And I just want you to know... that whatever it was... I'm here. I don't want you to hold back, I don't want you to feel like... / / The...
 

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