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| Anywhere But Here - Monday, July 24, 2006 | [[black background with white text]]
/ Due to the author's appearance at Tri-Noc Con this weekend, he has taken a dive into an alcoholic stupor and thus reeeeeealy feels like slumming it today.
/ Well, that and he hasn't been able to sit behind a computer for about a week now, and really needs to "fill." / [[more black background with white text]]
/ So, the author would like to take this slight turn in down time to ease fears that the strip has stagnated due to the romantic story.
/ While the author would tend to disagree, he is not above giving his readers what they truly want. / [[still more black background with white text]]
/ At the behest of the majority of the fan base, the author has decided to cut out three more months of dull and lifeless exposition and jump right to what everybody has been clamoring for...
/ HOT-STEAMY ACTION! / [[Dude and Chris in a big cloud of steam]]
/ Dude: I had no idea your place had a sauna in the basement.
/ Chris: I know, isn't it AWESOME!
/ [[black-background dialog box: DAMN THAT'S HOT!!!]] http://abh-comic.com/d/20060724.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Tuesday, July 25, 2006 | Mozillias: So where do you think he is?
/ Bill: I have no idea. /
/ Mozillias: Well, they better not be having sex. I've got fifty bucks riding on May eighth. /
/ Bill: I highly doubt that he'd be doing anything that you couldn't see on prime time television. Not counting Fox of course. /
/ {{Fully approved by the censors of ABC's "Desperate Housewives."}}
/ {{Disney-approved "family friendly" groping.}} http://abh-comic.com/d/20060725.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, July 26, 2006 | The Dude's Heart: BRAIN!!! HELP!!! I think I did a bad thing!!! /
/ The Dude's Brain: Good heavens man, what's wrong.
/ The Dude's Heart: Penis was getting all worked up... So I thought I should give him a sedative ... and ... and ... /
/ The Dude's Brain: And just what did you give him?
/ The Dude's Heart: 500 cc's of "Star Jones naked in Antarctica"
/ The Dude's Brain: Fat Star Jones or thin Star Jones?
/ The Dude's Heart: I ... uh... /
/ The Dude's Heart: fat
/ The Dude's Brain: Good god man!!! You've psychologically castrated him.
/ The Dude's Heart: I'm very bad at this... aren't I? http://abh-comic.com/d/20060726.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Friday, July 28, 2006 | Chris: Did I do something wrong?
/ Dude: No, I just... I don't know what happened. / Dude: But while we were making out... I just got this image in my head.
/ Chris: Of... / Dude: Star Jones naked in Antarctica / Chris: Oh, god... I'm going to be sick.
/ Dude: Just breathe baby... just breathe... http://abh-comic.com/d/20060728.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Monday, July 31, 2006 | Dude: I can't believe how calm you are.
/ Chris: Well, I won't lie to you. I AM frustrated. But it's not like this is exactly "new" to me. / Chris: I mean I've had some guys do some pretty crazy stuff. One guy couldn't get off unless I wore a mustache and talked about Quaker oatmeal. When you're comfortable with someone some weird stuff can happen... it's just that.. / [[Star Jones holding one of a group of penguins by the neck]]
/ Star Jones: You call this a **** green room, you peons!?! WHERE'S MY ******** Haagen-Dazs!!! / Chris [[grabbing the Dude, sobbing]]: OH GOD BABY!!! I CAN'T GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD!!!
/ Dude: Shhh... Shhhhhh... it'll be ok. http://abh-comic.com/d/20060731.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Monday, August 7, 2006 | Sarah: Look, I know I've told you to stay with him, but this isn't healthy for you, Chris. Maybe it's time you let him go.
/ Chris: Sarah, that's absolutely crazy. /
/ Chris: I've never had anyone treat me as well as he does. And I'm not going to risk it just because of this. I mean, do you remember the losers I used to bring home? /
/ Chris: Leave NOW!!!
/ Ethan: Look, I'm sorry I trashed your DVDs... and burned all your books... and raped your cat... But, I mean, technically it's not rape... I mean, I'm pretty sure she was getting into it by the end... So it's like she WANTED it, and that's like... consent... so I don't see why we can't have sex--
/ Chris: ETHAN!!! GET THE :EXPLITIVE DELETED: OUT OF MY DORM ROOM!!! / {{Ethan is a character from Tim Buckley's Ctrl+Alt+Del; ctrlaltdel-online.com}} http://abh-comic.com/d/20060807.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 | Ken: If Chris is alright with the performance issues, don't worry about it. Take your time... and just relax. If you try and force it, it'll just get worse. In fact... if you feel like you need to wait till ... say... October before you're ready, that's great. /
/ Ken: Seriously... If you can hold off until October 11th there's a cool hundred in it for you. http://abh-comic.com/d/20060816.html |
| Anywhere But Here - Thursday, August 17, 2006 | The Dude: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?!?
/ Druid: My brothers and I couldn't help but overhear your lament, and we have agreed to bestow upon you our most ancient and secret of cures to help you cure you problem. /
/ The Dude: But these are just naked pictures of Debbie Gibson
/ Druid: May they serve you well. http://abh-comic.com/d/20060817.html |
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