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| 420. | LOUIE
/ Maybe I'm not cut out for the modern dating scene... / That's absurd. / A suave guy like you ought to have an OCEAN of lovers! / LOUIE
/ Gee, I don't think I could handle an ocean of lov- / How about ONE lover? / LOUIE
/ Does her hair smell like chloroform? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091026.html |
| 421. | LOUIE
/ Why do I feel dizzy? / That's just the smell of my conditioner. / LOUIE
/ Why is my heart beating so fast? / That's just our physical chemistry. / LOUIE
/ Why did I just feel a sudden chill? / That's just your conscience. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091029.html |
| 422. | You've done nothing but MANIPULATE and EMBARRASS me since we met! Goodbye, you miserable CHILD. / CHAZ
/ And to think... That was my second most successful relationship. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091031.html |
| 423. | Come on... I just wanna go home! / See you soon, Louie. Don't worry - I already paid my tab. / Will you be paying the young lady's tab? / LOUIE
/ Hey! I thought you said you told the truth now! / That was a lie. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091102.html |
| 424. | LOUIE
/ That girl is definitely crazy. / LOUIE
/ She lies to me, toys with me, and laughs in my face! / LOUIE
/ It's nice to get attention, isn't it? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091105.html |
| 425. | CHAZ
/ Surely ONE of these good-natured ladies will go for you! / LOUIE
/ I don't know. I think I've had my fill of rejection. / CHAZ
/ Rejection? So what! Dude, you PUNCHED AN ALPACA tonight. / LOUIE
/ I punched a GUANACO. They're much smaller... http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091107.html |
| 426. | CHAZ
/ I'd like you to meet Louie. He's studying Gerontology. / JILL
/ Really? What do you think about Cynthia Kenyon's research? / LOUIE
/ I... um... the... hem... haw... / LOUIE
/ The next time you lie about me, could you just say I drive race cars or something? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091109.html |
| 427. | CHAZ
/ WHOOPS! I'm such a clumsy drunk! / Thanks for catching me. You're such a gentleman. / LOUIE
/ Well, uhh... I... / There aren't many gentlemen left, you know. You're a total catch! / Now where's that adorable drunk guy? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091112.html |
| 428. | Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah / CHAZ
/ Louie's finally hitting it off with someone - and she's even kinda cute! / CHAZ
/ Where've I seen her before? / JODIE
/ I really want to thank you for last night! / CHAZ
/ She'll only break your heart! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091114.html |
| 429. | Last call! / LOUIE
/ It's over. Tonight has been one humiliation after another, and it's over. / CHAZ
/ Don't worry - I know a great afterbar we can go to. / LOUIE
/ ...AFTER-BAR? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091116.html |
| 430. | LOUIE
/ It's 2:30 AM. Why are we at a house party? / CHAZ
/ When was the last time you partied all night? If you're WILLING, we can DARE TO BE GREAT. / CHAZ
/ Do you want to walk in and OWN that party? / LOUIE
/ My willingness is average. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091119.html |
| 431. | LOUIE
/ I think I got my second wind! / LYNN
/ Yeah, me too! / LYNN
/ Hey, I'll be right back. / CHAZ
/ She ditched you? Tough break, man. / LOUIE
/ No, she said she'll be right back. / CHAZ
/ Dude, that's exactly what people say at parties when they abandon you. / LOUIE
/ The nerve of her! Let's go. / LYNN
/ Hey, where'd he go? JERK! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091121.html |
| 432. | Did that creepy guy talk to you? / SAMANTHA
/ The guy who keeps trying to set up his friend? / CHAZ
/ Now listen to this, Louie, and I'll make you the life of the party. / LOUIE
/ ... / LOUIE
/ STEP OFF, MAN! I've had it! / LOUIE
/ You think you're doing me a FAVOR? / LOUIE
/ You're really just being a manipulative PUSTULE! / It's about time! / You TELL him! / CHAZ
/ I told you I'd make you the life of the party! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091123.html |
| 433. | SAMANTHA
/ So what's YOUR story, Louie? / LOUIE
/ I, uh, spent most of my time in school learning gymnastics and Hungarian... / SHOW US! / Oh MY! / LOUIE
/ Egy nyelv sosem el?g! / LYNN
/ Wow, Louie, where did you learn to make a BRANDY FLIP? / Where did you learn SHIATSU? / CHAZ
/ You know, I knew Louie back when. / SAMANTHA
/ Yeah, aren't you the guy he just YELLED at? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091126.html |
| 434. | CHAZ
/ Louie, how did you grow a MUSTACHE in the last two hours? / LOUIE
/ It's just been that kind of night. / LOUIE
/ I think there comes a moment for each of us where everything just gels. / CHAZ
/ Is this a ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME thing? / LOUIE
/ Fathers, better lock up your daughters and HOPE it is. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091128.html |
| 435. | CHAZ
/ I've never had a friend this COOL before! Louie has become an AWESOMENESS GURU overnight! / CHAZ
/ Hi, Louie! How's it - / LOUIE
/ Chaz, meet Amanda. She's my new main squeeze! / AMANDA
/ Hi! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091130.html |
| 436. | CHAZ
/ You're gonna love Louie. He's like a gentleman rebel. / CHAZ
/ Louie, meet Wanda. She's totally available. / LOUIE
/ Chaz, stop. Amanda and I are serious, get it? / CHAZ
/ How come you got committed as soon as you got cool? / LOUIE
/ How come you didn't become a good wingman until I got a girlfriend? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091203.html |
| 437. | Your car is ready! / I added BLINKER FLUID and switched out your MUFFLER BEARINGS. / Normally, that would run you sixty bucks, but I'll do it for FORTY. / Wow, thanks! / It really pays to know your mechanic! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091205.html |
| 438. | NEWELL
/ I've finished the x-ray specs! / NIC
/ The girl-watcher's dream! / NEWELL
/ Check out THOSE ladies! / NEWELL
/ Do the glasses work? Are the girls HOT? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091207.html |
| 439. | LUCIA
/ Rick, I have a confession. / LUCIA
/ I'm not really pregnant. It was just a prank to prove you're a jerk. / RICK
/ I just realized - You're not pregnant! / LUCIA
/ Umm... Yeah, I just said that. / RICK
/ Whoah! It's like you say things, and then I think them! / LUCIA
/ That's called LISTENING. / RICK
/ Hmm? Who did what now? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091210.html |
| 440. | HARRIET
/ Awesome! The bakery is still open! / NIC
/ Oh no! The outside world is closed already! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091212.html |
| 441. | NEWELL
/ Well, well. I see you're interested in nerds. / JILL
/ Um... I think I like a different kind of nerd... / NEWLL
/ Don't wear the shirt if you don't mean it! / NEWELL
/ Thank you! Thank you for being honest! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091214.html |
| 442. | BIZZY
/ I just saw this poor kid get pushed down! / HARRIET
/ One boy crouched behind him, and another boy pushed him over! / MICHAEL
/ Oh, you mean they tabletopped him? / HARRIET
/ YOU HAVE A WORD FOR THAT?!? / HARRIET
/ Boys are HORRIBLE! / MICHAEL
/ You didn't know? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091217.html |
| 443. | BIZZY
/ My cousin says her family didn't invite her on their cruise because she's out of shape. / MICHAEL
/ Seriously? They'd never give that as the reason for excluding her, right? / BIZZY
/ Her mom probably said... / BIZZY
/ "We didn't think you'd want to go - 'cause, you know, we'll be wearing BATHING SUITS." / MICHAEL
/ Girls are HORRIBLE! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091219.html |
| 444. | MICHAEL
/ I even have to get up early on Saturdays now. That makes seven days a week. / MICHAEL
/ I may never get to sleep in again in my life. / CHAZ
/ What keeps you going? / MICHAEL
/ I think misery makes me a better person. / CHAZ
/ That's a surprisingly optimistic viewpoint! / MICHAEL
/ Yeah, some men see the glass as 95% empty, I see it 5% full. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091228.html |
| 445. | MICHAEL
/ Is this year TWENTY-TEN or TWO THOUSAND TEN? / CHAZ
/ TWENTY-TEN! NEVER the other way! / CHAZ
/ Last year sholda been TWENTY AUGHT NINE. Somehow, people kept using the awkward TWO THOUSAND. / CHAZ
/ But this decade it'll be different! We have to spread TWENTY-TEN as soon as possible! / RICK
/ Happy TWO OH ONE OH! / MICHAEL
/ Where'd you get that? / RICK
/ It's in a Beyonce song. Been hearing it everywhere! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20091231.html |
| 446. | HARRIET
/ Today I'm gonna go out there and show the world some kindness for a change. / GUFFAW! You're wearnin' a beanie! http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20100102.html |
| 447. | I'm so glad we decided to wait until marriage! / Yeah, me too... / I'm pretty sure that's just a rumor... http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20100104.html |
| 448. | NIC
/ So there's this woman I want to flirt with... / CHAZ
/ Just tell her how nice her corduroys look. / NIC
/ Okay... but what if she's not wearing corduroys? / CHAZ
/ ...Why would you hit on a woman who's not wearing corduroys? http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20100107.html |
| 449. | HARRIET
/ I won't be discouraged! Today I'll be the PICTURE of kindness! / HARRIET
/ Hello! Sorry I got made at you the other day! / Your mouth is a triangle. / HARRIET
/ Apparently you're a little slow, so I'm gonna be patient with you... / Your insecurity is positively Voltairean! / HARRIET
/ Must my optimism always be mocked? / Yes. http://wingmen.comicgenesis.com/d/20100109.html |
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