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| Real Life comic strip from January / 02 / 2004 | Advil: / Cup: / Text: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
/ ...oog.
/ I really need to learn to take holidays into account more when planning the comic. Sure, I did a comic for New Year's Day, but I thought I would do today's comic when I got home from Cliff's New Years Party. / This may have worked, if not for the fact that due to the nature of New Years parties, I have a relatively vicious hangover. I have a headache that would kill an African bull elephant. And to top it all off, I'm more or less sleep deprived. It's like, even though I slept, my body says, "No, doesn't count if it was on the floor, dude." Friggen' body. / On the bright side, I managed to invent a new drink, which I call "Melon Rhind", though upon further consideration, it probably tastes more like a lemon rhind. I suppose everyone invents new drinks when they have that much alcohol on hand. :) / I'll do my best to work on the comic tomorrow at work though, so I can get back in the swing of things. Thankfully there's no holidays coming up anytime soon. Sorry 'bout all that. Have a good weekend, guys. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040102.html |
| Real Life comic strip from January / 05 / 2004 | [[Car (Volvo)]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: / / [[Car (Volvo)]] / Papers: / Pile of Trash: / Greg: / / [[Car (Volvo)]] / Container(s): / Pile of Trash: / Greg: / / [[Car (Volvo)]] / Pile of Trash: / Liz: How can you have more trash in your car than actual SPACE in your car!? / Greg: I dunno. I found a scientist from M.I.T. studying it in here not too long ago. Ask him. / M.I.T. scientist: Inconceivable! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040105.html |
| Real Life comic strip from January / 06 / 2004 | [[In front of U-Haul truck]] / Truck: / Greg: / Narration: The following conversation took place verbatim in Oakland, California at approximately 1:14 pm on January 3, 2004. No names have been changed. / Cliff: We should probably go back in and get something to tie down the dolly with. / / [[In front of U-Haul truck]] / Truck: / Greg: Naah. It'll be fine. / Cliff: But the back's empty...it's gonna bang around back here. / / [[In front of U-Haul truck]] / Truck: / Cliff: / Greg: So? What's it gonna hurt? It's a truck. It's made of TRUCK. / / [[In front of U-Haul truck (Black & White)]] / Truck: / Greg: / Cliff: / Narration: Greg Dean was found guilty of one count of extreme stupidity and sentenced to three smacks upside the noggin. / Narration: During sentencing, Greg insisted that "truck" was an element which appeared on the periodic table between beer and pretzels. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040106.html |
| Real Life comic strip from January / 07 / 2004 | [[Back Drop (Orange)]] / Greg (Artist): Today we answer another of your letters! / Letter: Dear Greg,
/ When you open your closet, is it all full of the same shirt, or do you have lots of different ones?
/ Sincerely,
/ Bob Farngold
/ Aberdeen, SD / / [[Closet]] / Clothing: / Greg (Artist): It's actually a little bit of both. I have lots of the main character shirts, but I also keep old ones, like this one from when we were black and white. / / [[Closet]] / Clothing: / Greg (Artist): I also have the shirt I wore back in the early days of Real Life. Fits a bit snug these days, though. / / [[Closet]] / Clothing: / Greg (Artist): Don't forget this outfit. Look out ladies...here I come. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040107.html |
| Real Life comic strip from February / 27 / 2004 | [[Dining Table]] / Chair: / Greg: FUEGO! / Tony: What the almighty hell?! / / [[Dining Table]] / Chair: / Tony: / Greg: FUEGO! / / [[Dining Table]] / Chair: / Greg: FUEGO! / Tony: FUEGO! / / [[Dining Table]] / Chair: / Tony: FUEGO! / Dave: What the hell is *wrong* with you people?! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040227.html |
| Real Life comic strip from March / 16 / 2004 | [[Dining Table]] / Greg: FUEGO! / Tony: FUEGO! / / [[Dining Table]] / Greg: / Tony: / Liz: CALIENTE! / / [[Dining Table]] / Greg: / Tony: / Liz: / / [[Dining Table]] / Greg: / Tony: / Liz: http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040316.html |
| Real Life comic strip from August / 11 / 2004 | [[Empire State Building (Top)]] / Narration: We've asked Spider-Man here to come to the top of the Empire State Building to help demonstrate the single most enjoyable thing in the history of gaming, made possible by the Spider-Man 2 game. Spidey, please commence the demonstration. / Spiderman: Can do. / / [[Empire State Building (Top)]] / Spiderman: Yee-hah! / / [[Empire State Building]] / Spiderman: And the French judge gives it a 3. / / [[Empire State Building]] / [[Outside (Urban)]] / Spiderman: / < http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040811.html |
| Real Life comic strip from September / 10 / 2004 | [[Living Room]] / Q-tip: / Greg: / Dave: What in the allmighty hell are you doing? / Correction: almighty / / [[Living Room]] / Q-tip: / Greg: I'm cleaning out my ear with a Q-tip. What does it look like? / Dave: Greg, you know that can cause severe damage to your ear canal, don't you? / / [[Living Room]] / Dave: / Greg: HOLY CRAP! I DROPPED IT! THE Q-TIP FELL IN!! / / [[Living Room]] / Pliers: / Greg: Wait... I'll just pull it out with these needle-nose pliers... / Dave: On second thought, you're fine. Nothing to damage in there, anyway. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/040910.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 07 / 2004 | [[Dining Table]] / Box: / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: OH yeah... CHECK IT. Got me a copy of the Chains of Promathia expansion. / Cliff: Umm...okay? / / [[Dining Table]] / Box: / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: If anyone needs me, I'll be busy exploring the Tavnazian Archipelago, or perhaps delving into Movalpolos. Who knows. / Cliff: Yeah... I got that a few weeks ago. It's pretty cool. / / [[Dining Table]] / Box: / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: / Cliff: / / [[Dining Table]] / Box: / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: You're like some kind of giant black hole that only sucks out JOY. A BLACK HOLE OF JOY. That's what you are. / Cliff: Glad to be of service. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041007.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 11 / 2004 | [[Dining Table]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Cliff: So, how are you enjoying all the new stuff in the expansion? / Greg: Oh, man... Are you kidding? It's awesome! I mean, what I've seen, anyway. / / [[Dining Table]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Cliff: How much have you seen so far? / Greg: Well, not a whole ton. I only really go on and play when Liz is on, so we stay at the same level. / / [[Dining Table]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: Trouble is, she's been so busy with schoolwork that it's been really tough to get on much. / Cliff: Okay, so, how much have you seen? / / [[Dining Table]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Cliff: / Greg: Umm...well, I noticed they have new loading music for the title screen! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041011.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 12 / 2004 | [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: / Cliff: So, now that you've seen a few episodes of Stargate SG-1, what do you think? / / [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Cliff: / Greg: Meh. I mean, it's a good enough show and all, but the premise just isn't really far enough out there, you know? / / [[Living Room]] / PADD: / Monolith: / Greg: / Cliff: What?! Greg, they walk through a freaking wormhole to other planets. In completely different galaxies! That's about as far out as you can go! / Tony: Hey Greg, I re-calibrated the dimensional remote to more accurate locate... / / [[Living Room]] / PADD: / Monolith: / Cliff: / Tony: What? What'd I do? / Greg: Blame him. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041012.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 14 / 2004 | [[Outside]] / Liz: I have to say, I really do enjoy the weather down here in the valley. / Greg: Meh. / / [[Outside]] / Greg: / Liz: Up in Tahoe, it goes from beautiful to freezing at the drop of a hat. / / [[Outside]] / Greg: / Liz: But it's nice to be able to take a walk in the middle of October and enjoy a wonderful summer day. / / [[Outside]] / Greg: Uh, Liz... It's FALL, not- / Liz: Greg, it's Sacramento. Don't try to act like there's a difference. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041014.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 15 / 2004 | [[Outside]] / Chair: / Greg: So, this is interesting. / Tony: That it is. / / [[Outside]] / Chair: / Greg: Nothing like the smoke and ash from forest fires 40 miles away to really make the day, eh? / Tony: It brings back some fond childhood memories. / / [[Outside]] / Chair: / Greg: / Tony: / / [[Outside]] / Chair: / Greg: Tony, you are seven shades of screwed up, do you know that? / Tony: I am aware. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041015.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 18 / 2004 | [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: / Tony: What'cha watching? / / [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: "Black Sky". It's a documentary on the building of Spaceship One. / Tony: Bah! HACKS. / / [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: / Tony: So they built a rocket-powered ship that flew past the edge of space, and was re-useable. BIG DEAL. / Correction: "...the edge of space and was reusable. BIG DEAL." / / [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: Tony, that was the entire POINT of the X-Prize! / Tony: But they didn't do it with STYLE!! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041018.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 19 / 2004 | [[Living Room]] / Monolith: / Greg: So what if Spaceship One was just a little rocket. That was the whole idea. Besides, it's not like you were competing with them or anything. / Tony: You bet your ass I was! Come on, I'll show you! / / [[Inside]] / Greg: What?! Tony, you built a spaceship!? / Tony: Damn skippy. And, true to the nature of the X-Prize, I built it entirely out of currently available parts. No fancy futuristic technology or anything. / / [[Inside]] / Greg: But, but... Tony, it's you. Why didn't you beat them to the X-Prize?! You could have had 10 million dollars! / Tony: Well, you know how Spaceship One's rockets ran on nitrous oxide and solid rubber? I designed an engine that ran on Dr. Pepper and sour cherry Bubble Yum, just to be a smartass. / / [[Tony's Workshop (Entrance)]] / Greg: / Tony: The bastards at the store only had original flavor Bubble Yum. They will rue the day. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041019.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 20 / 2004 | [[Tony's Workshop (Entrance)]] / Greg: / Tony: You thought Spaceship One was cool? Feh. CHILD'S PLAY. / / [[Tony's Workshop (Entrance)]] / Tony: Feast your eyes on THIS! / < http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041020.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 21 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: Holy crap, man. You really went whole-hog on this thing! / Tony: Of course. Why screw around? / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: It's fairly obvious you weren't just going for the X-Prize, though. / Tony: Oh? What makes you say that? / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: I don't remember the X-Prize requiring you to have five large plasma cannons on the spacecraft. / Tony: Two of 'em are ion cannons, but no point in arguing semantics. Yeah, I figured as long as I was gonna built a spacecraft, may as well use it to take over a planet or two. Mars is quite nice. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: Is it your goal in life to just keep outdoing yourself? / Tony: Hey, a man's gotta have a hobby. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041021.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 22 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: / Greg: Well? Come on! Let's get this bird in the sky! / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: Greg, we can't. I told you. The store is out of sour cherry Bubble Yum, and they won't get a new shipment for a month. / Greg: So, order it online. Duh. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: / Tony: / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: Your ideas intrigue me. I would like to subscribe to your newsletter. / Greg: So does that mean I get to be First Officer? http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041022.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 25 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Clipboard: / Greg: / Tony: All right... Let's make sure everyone's here. Helmsman Dave. / Correction: Alright... / Dave: Yo. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Clipboard: / Greg: / Dave: / Tony: Gunnery Sergeant Cliff. / Cliff: Here. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Clipboard: / Cliff: / Greg: / Dave: / Tony: Communications Officer Liz...? / Liz: Present and reporting for duty, sir! / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Clipboard: / Cliff: / Dave: / Liz: / Tony: Uh, Liz, you know you didn't have to- HURK! / Greg: Don't you DARE ruin this for me, you son of a bitch. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041025.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 26 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Box: / Greg: Hey bro! The gum just came in! / Tony: Hoy-! How much gum did you BUY?! / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Box: / Greg: I dunno, 12 cases. I figured this would be enough for a test run. / Tony: Test run? Heh, check this out. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Box: / Greg: / Tony: (tosses a piece of gum into the fuel receptacle) / < http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041026.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 27 / 2004 | [[Outside]] / Space ship: / < http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041027.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 28 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: Man, this SUCKS. / Tony: What? I thought you were crazy about going into space! / Greg: I AM... / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: / Greg: ...But with the inertial dampeners and gravity generators you installed, it doesn't feel like space at ALL. I wanted to be floating around and all that! / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: Well, come to think of it, there IS one place where there should still be zero-G's. / Greg: Ooh, really? Where at? The cargo bay? the engine room? / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: The outside of the ship. / Greg: Hoo-boy! Man, I sure do love all this gravity we have here! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041028.html |
| Real Life comic strip from October / 29 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: Wow... Did you ever imagine you'd be on a spaceship looking down on the planet Mars? / Dave: Yes. / Greg: Oh. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: Tony, do you realize we're about to be the first human beings ever to set foot on Mars? / Tony: The thought had occurred to me, yes. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: / Greg: Are we bringing down stuff to build an outpost? Terraformers to melt the ice caps? / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: If by terraformers you mean an army of evil robots to do my bidding while claiming the planet for my own...then yes. / Greg: Yes. That's EXACTLY what I meant. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041029.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 01 / 2004 | [[Mars]] / Flag: / Tony: All of Mars, hear my voice loud and clear! / / [[Mars]] / Flag: / Tony: I hereby proclaim myself first emperor and ruler supreme of the planet Mars! / / [[Mars]] / Flag: / Tony: / / [[Mars]] / Flag: / Tony: Glad that's all settled. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041101.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 02 / 2004 | [[Mars]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Tony: You know, all things considered, Mars is actually quite a nice planet as is. / Greg: How do you figure? / / [[Mars]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Tony: Well, it's fairly temperate, the red sky is kind of a nice change, and there's really nobody else here to annoy me. / Greg: Yeah, and no pesky breathable atmosphere to worry about it. / / [[Mars]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Tony: Details. I supposed I could terraform the place, but that would just be an invitation for more people to come colonize it. / Greg: (clunks Pepsi can against space helmet) / / [[Mars]] / Pepsi Can(s): / Greg: Are we really having this discussion? / Tony: I'm thinking of building a summer home with a nice view of Olympus Mons from the living room. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041102.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 03 / 2004 | [[Mars]] / / [[Mars]] / Car: / / [[Mars]] / Car: / / [[Mars]] / Remote Control: / Car: / Greg: Ha! I TOLD you I could jump it over the Mars rover! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041103.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 04 / 2004 | [[Mars]] / Cliff: So are you gonna name any of the geographical features now that you're running the place? / Tony: Yeah, I suppose so. They sound too scientific for my tastes. / / [[Mars]] / Dave: / Tony: Sure, knock yourself out. / Cliff: Hey, can I name the first continent? / / [[Mars]] / Tony: / Dave: Tony, Mars is a barren planet. Technically, there only IS one continent. / / [[Mars]] / Dave: / Tony: Actually, based on topographical data, as soon as I melt the ice caps, this spot will be an island roughly the size of New Hampshire. / Cliff: I dub this planet "Clifftopia!" http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041104.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 08 / 2004 | [[Mars]] / Greg: / Dave: / Tony: Allright guys, I've got the terraformers all set and working, the dimensional door beacon placed, and all kinds of sensors and other equipment placed. Everyone, back on the bus. / Correction: Alright / / [[Mars]] / Tony: / Dave: / Greg: Ooh, wait! One sec... There's one more thing I have to do! / / [[Mars]] / Tony: / Dave: / < http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041108.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 09 / 2004 | [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Greg: So, you're really gonna do it? You're gonna terraform Mars? / Tony: Meh... Sure, why not. If I'm going to own the planet, I may as well make it someplace I'd like to spend the weekend. / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Tony: / Greg: How long will it be until it's got a breathable atmosphere? / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Calculator: / Greg: / Tony: Well, I've got some pretty slick equipment down there, so hardly any time at all, relatively speaking. At the current rate, it will take only... / / [[Space ship (Intergalactic Cruiser One)]] / Calculator: / Tony: ...2,342 years. Not bad, by celestial standards. / Greg: Well hot damn... Pack my bags, I'm moving to Mars. http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041109.html |
| Real Life comic strip from November / 10 / 2004 | [[Tony's Workshop (Entrance)]] / Tony: / Greg: Aaah! It sure feels good to be home! / / [[Tony's Workshop (Entrance)]] / Greg: I'll be back. I'm gonna go check the mail, see if anything came. / Tony: Allright. / Correction: Alright / / [[Outside]] / package: / Greg: *GASP!* Grand Theft Auto San Andreas came while we were gone!! / / [[Living Room]] / package: / Greg: I could have been playing this last week!! / Tony: ...Except you were ON MARS! http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/041110.html |