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| Lesson #571 - Pluralization | Blackboard: Fetus. Fetuses. Fetodes. Fetii. Fetoa. Fetice. Communication may go to hell, but pluralization is much more fun when you make up your own rules.
/ Pose: Dante to the right of blackboard with back to viewer and hand under chin in a pondering manner.
/ File Under: Chaos, Language
/ Caption:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson571.html |
| Lesson #572 - Territorial Disputes | Blackboard: In 1859, Britain and America almost fell into armed conflict with each other over territorial disputes because of a trespassing pig in what is now known as "The Pig War." So if you're still wondering why global warming is a major issue, think about how the arctic ice is melting, and how countries... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson572.html |
| Lesson #573 - Valentine's Day Rebuke | Blackboard: It's a great thing if your significant other tells you that he/she doesn't celebrate Valentine's Day. It's even better if he/she refers to it as "Old People Sex Day."
/ File Under: Commercial Holidays, True Love
/ Caption: Don't let anyone tell you when to love. Unless, of course, it's your... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson573.html |
| Lesson #574 - The Olympics, Part II | Blackboard: There are so many fewer countries participating in the winter olympics than the summer games, partly because there are not as many events, but also because the climate in many parts of the world do not expose athletes to conditions where they can train and prepare. But don't worry - that... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson574.html |
| Lesson #575 - Definitions, Part IX | Panel 1
/ Blackboard: Burrito - A male sleeping style which involves wrapping the covers all around you and cocooning yourself inside
/ Pose: Dante to the left of the blackboard pointing at 'cocooning'
/ Panel 2
/ Blackboard: Tortilla - The female version
/ Pose: Dante to the left of the blackboard pointing... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson575.html |
| Lesson #576 - What Are Friends For | Blackboard: Friends. Because if you're going to give in to human nature and take advantage of people, don't you want to do it to people who will be able and willing to share the experience?
/ Pose: Dante to the right of blackboard shrugging with hands out.
/ File Under: Hey Can You Do Me A Solid
/ Caption:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson576.html |
| Lesson #577 - Meetings, Part II | Blackboard: What's worse? Having a meeting in a room without a clock? Having a meeting in a room with a clock? Or having a meeting in a room where the clock is broken at precisely the time that the meeting started?
/ Pose: Dante to the left of blackboard pointing with chalk at 'or'
/ File Under: Meetings,... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson577.html |
| Lesson #578 - Artistic Classifications | Blackboard: Realism is a branch of the arts that strives to depict characters, places, and occurrences as they truly exist in the real world. So the development of other branches of art where "realism" is reduced to a suffix - like "magical realism" - might be missing the point.
/ Pose: Dante to the... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson578.html |
| Lesson #579 - Blasphemy | Blackboard: You know his name wasn't really Jesus Christ, right? Jesus is just the Greek translation of Yeshua, which translates from Hebrew to Joshua. But his name wasn't Josh Christ, either, since his parents weren't Joseph and Mary Christ. So it's really not blasphemy to say "Jesus Christ," because... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson579.html |
| Lesson #580 - The Original Story | Blackboard: Movie studios will frequently "update" traditional works or put a fantastical spin on a well-known story in order to expand it for a wider audience. With this thought in mind, have you ever considered that "The Planet of the Apes" may have originated as Jane Goodall fan fiction?
/ Pose:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson580.html |
| Lesson #581 - Planning Your Future | Blackboard: Honestly? There are worse ways to go about planning out your future.
/ Pose: Dante to the left of blackboard holding a box for the board-game "Careers"
/ File Under: Careers
/ Caption: Careers really is the best non-trivia, more-luck-based board game there is. I don't think it's even close.... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson581.html |
| Lesson #582 - Wine | Blackboard: There is a fine but distinct line between wine and hobo vintage. Ignore presentation, color, smell and everything else but taste. If, after taking a sip, you say "woo," You're not drinking wine.
/ Pose: Dante to the left of blackboard pointing with chalk at third sentence.
/ File Under:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson582.html |
| Lesson # 583 ? Scandals | Blackboard: Can we please stop using ?-gate? s scandal suffix? Nixon and Watergate occurred over 35 years ago. We can find another scandal suffix word. All it has to be is a simple, one syllable word. So, here are some suggestions: goat; pow; pill; face; scar; slush; screw; slap; fist; blood; break;... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson583.html |
| Lesson # 584 ? Snow, Part II | Blackboard: Snow. Proof that mother nature secretly hates the color spectrum. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, neutral expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson584.html |
| Lesson #585 ? Meat Additives | Blackboard: Thrombin is a product that can glue pieces of meat together to create a single slab. Thus giving further credence to the theory that a the meat-containing dinners served in cafeterias originate from the same batch of random meat, and is just laced in different meat mold to create different... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson585.html |
| Lesson #586 ? Trust | Blackboard: They say you should only trust people as far as you can throw them. Which makes no sense, since anyone can throw most cats further than most dogs. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, with quizzical expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson586.html |
| Lesson # 587 ? Commenting | Blackboard: Chart. As the degree of anonymity decreases the probable range of the commenting degree of rationality decreases greatly. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, neutral expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson587.html |
| Lesson #588 ? Amputation | Blackboard: It is unfortunate that it is impossible for someone's head to survive if the rest of their body was amputated away, as there are far too many head-related puns going to wast that would help an amputee in terms of self-deprecating humor as medicine. When it comes to other lost body parts,... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson588.html |
| Lesson # 589 ? The Relationship Commandments | Blackboard: The Relationship Commandments: I.) I am thy significant other. Thou shalt have no toerh significant others besides me, unless we previously agreed on it, and honestly, probably not even then. II.) Thou shalt not make wrongful use of my name. Especially with a name of one of thy ex-es,... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson589.html |
| Lesson #590 ? Slogans | Blackboard: The Perfect Slogan → ?Upset everyone.? Great for a complete sports underdog. Great for someone just entering politics. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, neutral expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson590.html |
| Lesson #591 ? Student-Teacher Interactions | Blackboard: You should never be afraid to politely but bluntly tell your teacher what you truly think of his/her class. Just don't do so when he/she is looking for volunteers. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, neutral expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson591.html |
| Lesson # 592 ? Lost Friends | Blackboard: Old lost friends can be kind of like your appendix. At one point, they were probably really important to you, but over time your interaction with them decreased, and eventually, while they still may be present on the periphery of your daily life, you can often forget they are even there.... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson592.html |
| Lesson #593 ? Dubbing | Blackboard: Sometimes, the best and worst part of watching a movie on television is how they dub over the swear words and how that affects your memory of the movie. For example, it is bot hilarious and entirely wrong to remember ?Die Hard? for its catchphrase,? yippie-ki-yay, mister falcon.? / Pose:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson593.html |
| Lesson #594 - Global Warming (Bracket week II) | Blackboard: Bracket. People who believe in/know that global warming exists. People who deny that global warming exists. Winner. Not polar bears.
/ Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing at the board with chalk, neutral expression on face. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson594.html |
| Lesson #595 - Breakfast Foods (Bracket Week II) | Blackboard: Bracket. A muffin. A donut. Winner. A very contented but bloated stomach.
/ Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing at the board with chalk, neutral expression on face. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson595.html |
| Lesson #596 - St. Patrick's Day (Bracket Week II) | Blackboard: Bracket. Celebration of Irish Culture. Ignorance of Irish culture. Winner. Stereotyping.
/ Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing at the board with chalk, neutral expression on face. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson596.html |
| Lesson #597 - Unique College Nicknames (Bracket Week) | Blackboard: 9 boards. You wouldn't know what they are unless you looked it up regional. (1) Eutectic versus (8) zips. (4) chanticleers versus (5) chaparrals. (3) billikens versus (6) javelinas. (2) gorloks versus (7) ephs. Careers regional. (1) claim jumpers versus (8) medics. (4) mound builders versus... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson597.html |
| Lesson #598 - Everyone's opinion of someone on the internet (Bracket week II) | Blackboard: Bracket. Self-loathing versus boredom. Winner. Hey! Let's go be dicks on the internet!
/ Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing at the board with chalk, neutral expression on face. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson598.html |
| Lesson #599 - God | Blackboard: you know, God spelled backwards is Dog. Just mull that one over for a little while.
/ Pose: German, right side of the board, staring to the left, wearing a lab coat. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson599.html |
| Lesson #600 - Poachers | Blackboard: It's scary to think that there might be poachers out there with a literal interpretation of "Houndstooth Pattern".
/ Pose: German Shepherd, dog http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson600.html |
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