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| Lesson #181 - Hair Dye | Blackboard: Grey hair Dye! Helping you get carded less and giving you that gravitas that you'll never have otherwise! / Pose: Dante, right side of board, gesturing to the board with both hands palms open, open mouthed expression. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson181.html |
| Lesson #182 - Posture | Blackboard: Excuses for bad posture, Age 5 to 10 - Not knowing better, Age 11 to 14 - too many video games, Age 15 to 18 - rebelling against parents, Age 18 to 30 - Crushing weight of parents' expectations, Age 31 to 45 - Crushing weight of spouse's disappointment, Age 46 to 55 - Trying to exercise like... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson182.html |
| Lesson #183 - Baby Names | Blackboard: Baby names inspired by books (rankings for U.S. only) Holden- 382nd in 2007, peaked at 357th in 2005, entered the top 1000 in 1987. Atticus - 683rd in 2007, peaked in 2007, entered into the top 1000 in 2004. Ishmael - last ranked 952nd in 1998, peaked at 788th in 1912, only eight years in... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson183.html |
| Lesson #184 - Shoe Sizes | Blackboard: Line graph showing a relationship between shoe size and availability. The graph shows three peaks: at average sizes 8-11, at size 14-15 and at size 19. It is further explained that the second peak is created by NBA players (anything's available to them) and that the third peak is created... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson184.html |
| Lesson #185 - Presidential Nicknames | Blackboard: Graph with four quadrants. X axis ranges from Bad President to Good President. The Y axis ranges from good nickname to bad nickname. Nicknames are placed on the plane. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, neutral expression to camera wearing two hats. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson185.html |
| Lesson #186 - Final Exams | Blackboard: Graph with four quadrants. X axis ranges from 'Need to study study study' to 'might as well go drinking, you will get the same grade'. Y axis ranges from liberal arts to science. Subjects are placed on the plane. / Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing with chalk to graph neutral... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson186.html |
| Lesson #187 - Break-Up Songs | Blackboard: Graph with four quadrants. Y axis ranges from 'sorrow' to 'angry'. X axis ranges from 'My fault' to 'His/Her fault'. Songs are placed on the plane. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, partially out of photo. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson187.html |
| Lesson #188 - Creative Ideas | Blackboard: Graph with four quadrants. X axis ranges from 'Bad Idea' to 'Good Idea'. Y axis ranges from 'Comedy' to 'Serious'. Ideas are placed on the plane. / Pose: Dante right side of board, both hands on top of head. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson188.html |
| Lesson #189 - Fertility Rate | Blackboard: Graph with four quadrants. X axis ranges from 'Barren' to 'Fertile'. Y axis ranges from 'High Satisfaction of Life' to 'Low Satisfaction of Life'. Countries are placed on the plane. / Pose: Dante, right side of board, partially out of photo. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson189.html |
| Lesson #190 - Winter Driving | Blackboard: Winter driving thought process
/ 1)Alright, let's drive slow and safe.
/ 2) Man. this guy is being too safe, we can pass him just fine.
/ 3) Oh god, we can't stop sliding to the left and what's that oh god it's a ditch we're going to fall into the
/ 4) Goddamnit / Pose: Dante, right sid of the... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson190.html |
| Lesson #191 - Explanation of DEFCON Status | Blackboard: DEFCON 5 -> All's cool, guys, go get a beer. DEFCON 4 -> Intelligence is saying to be a bit more on your toes, but stay relaxed, gang. DEFCON 3 -> Alright, something fishy is going on, time to get classified. DEFCON 2 -> Oh God Oh God Oh God. DEFCON 1 -> GO GO FIGHT DO SOMETHING ATTACK FIGHT... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson191.html |
| Lesson #192 - Stupid Ideas | Blackboard: Want a surefire way to scratch yourself up? Either belly-flop into a large briar patch, Or try to teach your cat how to tango. / Pose: Dante, right side of board, with chalk pointing at board, serious expression looking at camera. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson192.html |
| Lesson #193 - The Quality of Movies | Blackboard: A line graph depicting the relationship between the quality of a movie and ones enjoyment of said movie. / Pose: Dante, right side of board, neutral expression pointing with chalk to the board. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson193.html |
| Lesson #194 - Raking | Blackboard: How to rake (if you live in the right area): Wait for the last tree to drop its leaves, immediately get hit with snow, snow melts another snow storm hits (this happens repeatedly), eventually spring arrives and use the lawn mower. / Pose: Dante, right side of board, neutral expression with... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson194.html |
| Lesson #195 - Exercising With Animals | Blackboard: Should you go running with your dog? Depends on the type of dog. An overly energetic dog ("Let's run Let's run Let's run") - Yes. A fat Lazy Lump ("Here's an idea, how about YOU go for a jog, and I sneak up on the couch") - no. A scent addict ("Hey, a smell! Let's stop. Wait, another smell!")... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson195.html |
| Lesson #196 - Confusing Things | Blackboard: A list of confusing things: Quantum foam, Keanu Reeves' Successful career, the policeman-donut relationship, the afterlife, cryptic crosswords, the shows that DO make it on tv, kabaddi, hawaiian pizza, and the lizard people conspiracy. / Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing with... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson196.html |
| Lesson #197 - Moss | Blackboard: Contrary to popular belief, moss grows on whatever side of the tree it damn well feels like growing on. / Pose: Dante, left side of the board, pointing with chalk at the board. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson197.html |
| Lesson #198 - The True Meaning of Christmas Songs | Blackboard: "Baby it's cold outside" is an ode to date rape drugs. / Pose: Dante, left side of board, pointing to the board with chalk. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson198.html |
| Lesson #199 - The True Meaning of Christmas Songs, Part II | Blackboard: "All I want for Christmas is you" is a holiday toast to cannibalism. / Pose: Dante, right side of board, only upper torso and head are visible in photo. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson199.html |
| Lesson #200 - Year In Review | STW Lesson #200 - Year in Review (http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson200.html) / Panel 1 / 'Twas the night before Christmas,
/ And all through the class,
/ Only seven days remained
/ In the year nearly past. / Children were sleeping,
/ Most parents in bed,
/ But Dante remained awake,
/ Rest not in his head / Pose:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson200.html |
| Lesson #201 - Christmas Truth | Christmas is all about Jesus, / And rightfully so.
/ But don't forget one key part of the story, one vital part - / Who heard the angel chorus, who were the first outsiders to visit the Manger,
/ Who were called upon to share the good news and spread the truth to everyone else? / The Shepherds. / Pose:... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson201.html |
| Lesson #202 - Things You Hope To Never Say . . . | ... To your dog on the day after Thanksgiving or Christmas
/ ---------------------------------------------------------- / "Why does your breath smell like turkey?" / Pose: Looking at camera surprised while chalk points towards board. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson202.html |
| Lesson #203 - Musical Repetition | Graph. / Values: / Delightfully quirky / Normal
/ Obnoxious / Other axis: / # of variations of the same Christmas song you are willing to play in a row in the listening range of others / Pose: Body facing board, head turned left and facing the camera. Mouth opened, chalk pointing at board. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson203.html |
| Lesson #204 - Snowball Ettiquette | Blackboard: If you want to get in a snowball fight, and your desired target is too far away for you to hit him or her,
/ while it is proper ettiquette for you to say, "Excuse me, but I am trying to hit you wiht a snowball, would you mind coming closer so you will be in rages?"
/ it will liekly not being... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson204.html |
| Lesson #205 - Bed Contentment | Graph. / Vertical value:
/ Contentment / Horizontal: / Fraction of bed you have to yourself(graphed in reverse numerical order) / 1 - 1/2 - 1/3 - 1/4 - 1/5 / Values in graph: / Stretched out
/ Together, sharing warmth
/ Cat hops onto the bed
/ Dog hops onto the bed
/ Dog stretches out while sleeping
/ Cat... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson205.html |
| Lesson #206 - Romantic Movies | Blackboard: Cause: Watch Romantic Movie. Immediate Effect: increased belief that mind-reading is expected in romantic relationships. eventual effect: telepathy still not proven. relationship crashes and burns. Non-scientists. Scientists. Long-term effect: Keep trying to find that perfect, romantic, mind-reading... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson206.html |
| Lesson #207 - New Years' Parties | Blackboard: Thoughts You're Better Off NOT Starting the New Year With
/ - "That was my spouse I kissed right after the ball dropped, right?"
/ - "Drank too much... hope I can make it to the toilet in time, this time!"
/ - "Has my fly been open all night?"
/ - "Hey, let's go find a chapel!"
/ - "Alright,... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson207.html |
| Lesson #208 - Resolutions | Blackboard: Pot of Commitment versus Time. Reduce stress. Dieting. Exercise. Get better grades. Revenge.
/ Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing at the board with chalk, neutral expression on face http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson208.html |
| Lesson #209 - Supernames | Blackboard: Actual Superhero/Supervillain Names Already In Use
/ - Madame Ovary
/ - Antenna Lad
/ - Ghetto Blaster
/ - Flamesplasher
/ - Rainbow Raider
/ - Angar the Screamer
/ - Bert Day
/ - Madame Xanadu
/ - Animal-Vegetable-Mineral man
/ - Mr. Banjo
/ - Congorilla
/ - Woodgod
/ - Her
/ - Pyra
/ -... http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson209.html |
| Lesson #210 - Local News | Blackboard: Local News
/ Everyone has to start somewhere.
/ In no job, however, is it so public that you're going nowhere. / Pose: Dante, right side of the board, pointing with chalk to the board, raised eyebrows at camera. http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson210.html |
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