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| Action Scarecrow | General: Oh boy! it's Action Scarecrow! / [[Scarecrow standing near a field of corn]] / [[still standing]] / [[hasn't moved one inch]] / [[still the same scarecrow standing there]] / [[hasn't moved yet]] / [[or now]] / [[the sun is setting already]] / [[the sun is nearly set and he hasn't mo... http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/10/action-scarecrow/ |
| Mr. Magnetic Blood | [[You see a gravestone with the words: "Here lies Mr magnetic blood, the guy whose blood was magnetic to bullets" ]] / [[Earlier, you see a man sitting near a doctor who is giving two thumbs down]]
/ Doctor: I'm sorry, Mr. Magnetic Blood. You have Tuberculosis. There is nothing we can do. http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/15/mr-magnetic-blood/ |
| Mr. Magnetic Blood | [[You see a gravestone with the words: "Here lies Mr magnetic blood, the guy whose blood was magnetic to bullets" ]] / [[Earlier, you see a man sitting near a doctor who is giving two thumbs down]]
/ Doctor: I'm sorry, Mr. Magnetic Blood. You have Tuberculosis. There is nothing we can do. http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/15/mr-magnetic-blood/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/17/conservation-of-mass/?ref=nf">http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/17/conservation-of-mass/?ref=nf | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| Sick & Dying | [[A visitor stands on the other side of a patient's bed]]
/ Visitor: Listen. I know you're sick & dying, but I have to tell you something. / Visitor: I've been sleeping with your wife. / [[The visitor is having sex on the floor right next to the patient]]
/ Visitor: Right next to you. / Visitor: For... http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/22/sick-dying/ |
| The Worst Thing | [[Two guys talking to each other]]
/ Right guy: Is there anything worse than being shot with a gun that's loaded with aggressive badgers who themselves have guns, and they just go to town on you, biting and shooting like crazy? / Left guy: No, I think that's basically the worst. / [[Right guy points... http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/24/the-worst-thing/ |
| President Wobblefoot | Character One: Ha ha ha! / Character One: Yes! Today, it will be today! / Character One: Today I will expose that piece of scum, president Wobblefoot!! / Character One: Alright. / [[Later]]
/ Hey, guys.
/ Guys, check out my foot. / President Wobblefoot:
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/29/president-wobblefoot/ |
| President Wobblefoot | Character One: Ha ha ha! / Character One: Yes! Today, it will be today! / Character One: Today I will expose that piece of scum, president Wobblefoot!! / Character One: Alright. / [[Later]]
/ Hey, guys.
/ Guys, check out my foot. / President Wobblefoot:
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/29/president-wobblefoot/ |
| Wings | [[Man with wings on back opposite woman with plate of chicken wings]]
/ Man: Look! I got wings!
/ Woman: So did I.
/ Woman: They are from the local chicken wing store. / [[Man flies into the air]]
/ Man: I can fly now.
/ Woman: They are "honey barbeque" flavor.
/ Woman: It is an awesome flavor.
/ Woman: For... http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/31/wings/ |
| Wings | [[Man with wings on back opposite woman with plate of chicken wings]]
/ Man: Look! I got wings!
/ Woman: So did I.
/ Woman: They are from the local chicken wing store. / [[Man flies into the air]]
/ Man: I can fly now.
/ Woman: They are "honey barbeque" flavor.
/ Woman: It is an awesome flavor.
/ Woman: For... http://buttersafe.com/2008/01/31/wings/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/05/bears/?ref=nf">http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/05/bears/?ref=nf | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| King of the Jungle | Gazelle: When you're done sweeping, go find me some grass to graze on!! Stupid lion.
/ Lion (thinking): Why am I doing this? My life is terrible. I wish I could somehow boss him around instead. / [[The lion imagines himself laughing at the sweeping gazelle]]
/ Lion: HA HA HA STUPID GAZELLE
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/12/king-of-the-jungle/ |
| King of the Jungle | Gazelle: When you're done sweeping, go find me some grass to graze on!! Stupid lion.
/ Lion (thinking): Why am I doing this? My life is terrible. I wish I could somehow boss him around instead. / [[The lion imagines himself laughing at the sweeping gazelle]]
/ Lion: HA HA HA STUPID GAZELLE
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/12/king-of-the-jungle/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/14/the-time-traveller/?ref=nf">http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/14/the-time-traveller/?ref=nf | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| Bless You | < http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/19/bless-you/ |
| Catch | Plot: / The guys fails to catch the ball. At one point an eagle flies in and it looks like it is going to be the source of the problem, but it is not. Soon, you will become hopeful that maybe the guy will catch the ball after all, but then he thinks of spaghetti at the wrong time. / [[ These events... http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/21/catch/ |
| Catch | Plot: / The guys fails to catch the ball. At one point an eagle flies in and it looks like it is going to be the source of the problem, but it is not. Soon, you will become hopeful that maybe the guy will catch the ball after all, but then he thinks of spaghetti at the wrong time. / [[ These events... http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/21/catch/ |
| Catch | Plot: / The guys fails to catch the ball. At one point an eagle flies in and it looks like it is going to be the source of the problem, but it is not. Soon, you will become hopeful that maybe the guy will catch the ball after all, but then he thinks of spaghetti at the wrong time. / [[ These events... http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/21/catch/ |
| Water Fight | [[A boy and girl elephant are drinking from a watering hole]] / [[They playfully spray each other with their trunks]] / [[A spray of blood suddenly covers them]] / [[The boy and girl glare at a smiling, wrinkly, buck-toothed elephant with a nosebleed, his blood seeping slowly into the watering ho... http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/26/water-fight/ |
| Water Fight | [[A boy and girl elephant are drinking from a watering hole]] / [[They playfully spray each other with their trunks]] / [[A spray of blood suddenly covers them]] / [[The boy and girl glare at a smiling, wrinkly, buck-toothed elephant with a nosebleed, his blood seeping slowly into the watering ho... http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/26/water-fight/ |
| The Fireball | [[A man and a woman watching a giant fireball about to hit a city]]
/ Man: So, once that fireball hits, everyone in the city will die?
/ Woman: Actually, the impact will probably vaporize everything off the surface of the planet. / Man: So you're saying this thing is pretty hot then. http://buttersafe.com/2008/02/28/the-fireball/ |
| The Inventor | [[ A man rubs his chin whilst thinking:]]
/ Man: invent invent invent. what should I invent? / [[ A light bulb appears above his head]]
/ Man: OH, I KNOW. / {{sometime later}} / [[The man now stands in front of a group of people with a notepad next to him]]
/ Man: hey guys. guys, check out my new invention.... http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/04/the-inventor/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/06/the-massive-beard/#.TzwkW_huOBA.facebook">http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/06/the-massive-beard/#.TzwkW_huOBA.facebook | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| Cake Heaven | [[A cake]] / [[Hand cuts the cake]]
/ [[Cake's soul flies away, with an unhappy expression]]
/ Cake: < http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/11/cake-heaven/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/13/romance-on-the-floating-island/?ref=nf">http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/13/romance-on-the-floating-island/?ref=nf | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| The Awesome Tree | Man: Do you like my new tree. Is it awesome. / [[The tree suddenly sprouts question marks]]
/ Guy: Yes. I like that it's sprouting question marks. / Man: Oh dang, is that where all my question marks went. What the heck. / Man: Hmm... / [[The man climbs the tree and gets a question mark]]
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/18/the-awesome-tree/ |
| Disapproval | In this comic: You are mildly disapproved of. / [[A man stares at you, with a dull expression on his face]] / [[A man stares at you, frowning slightly]] / [[A man indicates his disapproval by tilting his head slightly and staring]] / {{Author blurb: Look at him. You look at him and think about what... http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/20/disapproval/ |
| Disapproval | In this comic: You are mildly disapproved of. / [[A man stares at you, with a dull expression on his face]] / [[A man stares at you, frowning slightly]] / [[A man indicates his disapproval by tilting his head slightly and staring]] / {{Author blurb: Look at him. You look at him and think about what... http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/20/disapproval/ |
| Waiting in Line | [[A man sweats miserably under the sun]]
/ Man: IT'S HOT. / [[A line of people stretch off into the distance next to a sign that reads DRINKING FOUNTAIN 900km]]
/ Man: Also, this is probably THE LONGEST LINE EVER. / [[A woman cheerily holds up her baby, which happily vomits on the man]]
/ Man: and now... http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/25/waiting-in-line/ |
| Someday | [[A boy looks up at the moon]] / Boy: Someday I'm going to go to the moon! / That Friday / [[A car slowly floats to the top of the moon]]
/ < http://buttersafe.com/2008/03/27/someday/ |
| Buff Dolphin | Small Child: "Gee, Buff Dolphin, how'd ya get so buff?" / Buff Dolphin: "Ha ha ha ha ha." / Buff Dolphin (not pictured): "Drugs." http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/01/buff-dolphin/ |
| Buff Dolphin | Small Child: "Gee, Buff Dolphin, how'd ya get so buff?" / Buff Dolphin: "Ha ha ha ha ha." / Buff Dolphin (not pictured): "Drugs." http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/01/buff-dolphin/ |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/03/spider-flakes/?ref=nf">http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/03/spider-flakes/?ref=nf | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| Fortune Cookie Time | [[Octopus and Saddest Turtle sit at a table holding fortune cookies]]
/ Octopus: Ok, Saddest Turtle, it's... / Octopus: FORTUNE COOKIE TIME! ...I'll go first. / Octopus: "You Will Find Your Horizons Suddenly Broadened" / [[Octopus gives a sly expression]]
/ Octopus: ...in BED, that is! / Octopus: Ha... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/08/fortune-cookie-time/ |
| Fortune Cookie Time | [[Octopus and Saddest Turtle sit at a table holding fortune cookies]]
/ Octopus: Ok, Saddest Turtle, it's... / Octopus: FORTUNE COOKIE TIME! ...I'll go first. / Octopus: "You Will Find Your Horizons Suddenly Broadened" / [[Octopus gives a sly expression]]
/ Octopus: ...in BED, that is! / Octopus: Ha... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/08/fortune-cookie-time/ |
| Punch Monster and the Mountain of Grapes | [[Two people stand next to a giant mountain of grapes]]
/ Jeff: Hey man, nice mountain of grapes. / Jeff: So what are-- Is that Punch Monster? What's he doing here? / [[Close-up of Punch monster lurking in the grapes]]
/ Mike: Oh, he just likes to hang out there. He sits around in the grapes and sometimes... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/10/punch-monster-and-the-mountain-of-grapes/ |
| Arbitrary Potato and the Most Beautiful Woman in the World | [[A man approaches a potato on a pedestal]]
/ Man: Arbitrary Potato, / Man: everybody calls my wife UGLY. / [[The man points to a dog in a dress]]
/ Man: They all say she looks like a dog. / Man: But I think she is the most beautiful woman in the world! / Man: Arbitrary Potato, tell me please, is my... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/15/arbitrary-potato-and-the-most-beautiful-woman-in-the-world/ |
| Arbitrary Potato and the Most Beautiful Woman in the World | [[A man approaches a potato on a pedestal]]
/ Man: Arbitrary Potato, / Man: everybody calls my wife UGLY. / [[The man points to a dog in a dress]]
/ Man: They all say she looks like a dog. / Man: But I think she is the most beautiful woman in the world! / Man: Arbitrary Potato, tell me please, is my... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/15/arbitrary-potato-and-the-most-beautiful-woman-in-the-world/ |
| The New Pet | [[Two people talking, one of them has a small, pink creature next to her.]]
/ Person 1: Is that a new pet?
/ Person 2: Yes. I found it in the swamp.
/ Person 1: Does it do anything?
/ Person 2: Yes.
/ Person 2: It looks at you while you sleep. / [[At night, Person 1 is shown lying in bed with a nervous expression... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/17/the-new-pet/ |
| This is for You | [[A man holds out a big gift-wrapped present]]
/ Man: This is for you.
/ Guy: REEEALLY?
/ Man: Yes. / [[The guy opens the box]]
/ Guy: OH WOW, AN EMPTY BOX. / [[The guy lifts nothing out of the box, smiling]] / [[Closeup of the guy's hands, which hold only INTANGIBLE HAPPINESS]] / {{Alternate ending:... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/22/this-is-for-you/ |
| This is for You | [[A man holds out a big gift-wrapped present]]
/ Man: This is for you.
/ Guy: REEEALLY?
/ Man: Yes. / [[The guy opens the box]]
/ Guy: OH WOW, AN EMPTY BOX. / [[The guy lifts nothing out of the box, smiling]] / [[Closeup of the guy's hands, which hold only INTANGIBLE HAPPINESS]] / {{Alternate ending:... http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/22/this-is-for-you/ |
| Dragons | [[A guys stands next to a dragon.]]
/ Guy: Everyone look at my dragon!
/ Guy: Am I a cool guy now?
/ Guy: Am I cool for having a dragon. http://buttersafe.com/2008/04/24/dragons/ |
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