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Irregular Webcomic! #1531 [[scene: The seedy side of the Bune starport town.]] / Serron: You're the Streetwise expert. What's the first step? / Iki Piki: We go into a bar and make some discreet inquiries. / Serron: Sounds good. / Iki Piki: Here's one. Now, leave the talking to me. {they enter} / Iki Piki: [[shouting]] Anyone...
Irregular Webcomic! #1532 Stud: [[lying on the floor of a cell in Dr No's secret headquarters]] Well, that's it then. / Stud: There's no way anyone could escape from one of these cells. / [[silence]] / Honey: [[poking her head out of a duct above Stud]] James? What are you doing lying there? Come on, let's escape through these...
Irregular Webcomic! #1533 [[scene: The far end of the Bridge of Khazad-Doom, the party having crossed over it.]] / Kyros: Stand back. I'm going to destroy the Bridge. / Dwalin: Nayyy! [[translation: Nooo!]] / Dwalin: 'Tis living stoone! Thu heart und soul o' Dwergenberg! 'Twould be akin tae murder tae harm it! I cannae alloow...
Irregular Webcomic! #1534 Erwin: Die tracking device says Ginn- Fraulein Doktor Smith is heading to die Vatican. We can take a shortcut across die Roman Forum. / Haken: Sehr gut! / Erwin: [[walking through the magnificent ruins of the Roman Forum]] It is funny. Die Romans planned to build an empire to last a thousand years....
Irregular Webcomic! #1535 Shady black market weapons dealer: I might know someone who might have access to some merchandise that may be of interest... / Iki Piki: What have you got? / Shady black market weapons dealer: What do you want? / Iki Piki: Depends. How much is it? / Shady black market weapons dealer: How much you got?...
 
Irregular Webcomic! #1536 [[scene: A single panel showing a worm relief teacher sitting at a desk in front of a class of worm kids, reading a note from the sick teacher]] / [note]: To: Relief Teacher / [note]: Re: Notes on students / [note]: Annie Lid - well rounded / [note]: Nina Tode - copies other students' work / [note]:...
Irregular Webcomic! #1537 [[scene: The Infinite Featureless PLane of Death]] / Spanish Merchant: ¿Dónde estamos? / [subtitle]: Where are we? / Death of Being Stabbed By A Cutlass: YE'VE BEEN STABBED BY A CUTLASS. / Spanish Merchant: Ah, habla inglés. So then, we are killed? / [subtitle]: Ah, English. So then, ... / Death of...
Irregular Webcomic! #1538 Alvissa: How are you going to destroy the Bridge? / Kyros: The Balrog is a creature of elemental flame. By channelling its essence I can conjure a fireball the likes of which have never been seen before! / Kyros: Enough to crack the Bridge and send the Balrog plummeting to its doom! / Lambert: Oh...
Irregular Webcomic! #1539 [[scene: Ishmael's college dorm room.]] / [sound]: Knock! Knock! / Ishmael: [[opening the door]] The Martians! / Martian 1: Step aside, elite Earthling combat warrior. We're armed. / Ishmael: I told you on the phone: I can't help you access Earth's defence systems! / Martian 1: Your moral fortitude...
Irregular Webcomic! #1540 Yeti: [[bursting into Cthulhu's secret lair in Kathmandu]] Cthulhu! Hands off that human! / Cthulhu: Migou! Fhtagn! / [[they wrestle]] /Terry: [[running into the chamber]] Steve! / Steve: [[chained to the wall]] Terry! / Terry: [[watching the yeti wrestle with Cthulhu]] Just when you think you've seen...
 
Irregular Webcomic! #1541 [[scene: Outside the Vatican City, at night. The Joneses and Dr Smith are partially concealed behind a barrier, watching the Swiss Guards.]] / Ginny: The guards change shifts at midnight. That's our time. / Prof. Jones: Can't we just go to sleep? / Ginny: We may be on the verge of one of the greatest...
Irregular Webcomic! #1542 Iki Piki: So, this merchandise, is it ex-military? / Shady black market weapons dealer: You want it to be? / Iki Piki: How much power does it use? / Shady black market weapons dealer: How much you got? / Iki Piki: Are parts easy to find? / Shady black market weapons dealer: How easy you want? / Iki...
Irregular Webcomic! #1543 [[scene: interior of air conditioning ducts]] / Stud: [[crawling]] Clever of me, finding these ducts. / Honey: [[crawling behind him]] Uh-huh... / Stud: Oww! The metal is getting scorchingly hot. / Honey: You could take your dinner jacket off. / Stud: Is that a proposition? / Honey: To pad our hands! / Stud:...
Irregular Webcomic! #1544 [[scene: Outside the Oval Office, in the White House.]] / Loren: I need to see the President. / Secretary: He's in a meeting with the Cabinet. / Loren: It's urgent... / Secretary: Let me check. [[checks the door]] / Secretary: Okay, he's done with them. You can go in. / [[Loren enters the Oval Office...
Irregular Webcomic! #1545 [sound]: Fwackoom! / [[The Bridge breaks, the Balrog falls]] / Kyros: Ha! Take that, you stupid Balrog! Let's see you try to harm us now that you're plummeting to your doom! / [[Balrog's whip grabs Kyros around the leg]] / Kyros: Okay, not bad.
 
Irregular Webcomic! #1546 Crows Nest: Sail off the port bow! She's flying the Jolly Roger! / Ponsonby: Now, Captain Long Tom Short, let's see how you do against the firepower of this fully armed and operational battle station! / GM: [[glare]] / Ponsonby: Erm... against the cannon of a fully gunned and crewed British galle...
Irregular Webcomic! #1547 Ginny: They're leaving. Let's go! [[runs across the square to the front doors of the Vatican as the guards move off to be relieved]] / Monty: Right... So what are we going to do? Walk straight into one of the most secure buildings in the world? / Minnesota Jones: [[trying the door]] It's unlocked. / Prof....
Irregular Webcomic! #1548 Yeti: Cthulhu is defeated! Now, to complete the binding ritual and banish him from Earth for 99 years, we need a drop of mercury. / Steve: There's a thermometer over there; I'll go break it open. [[walks over to a nearby desk]] / Steve: Crikey! There's a rare giant Nepalese poisonous mountain frog here!...
Irregular Webcomic! #1549 [[scene: The bridge of the Legacy]] / Paris: I'm back. Has the cargo been delivered yet? / Spanners: Another few hours. / Paris: Okay. I'll prep the ship for departure. / Spanners: Iki Piki and Serron aren't back yet. / [[beat]] / Paris: I won't tell if you won't.
Irregular Webcomic! #1550 [[scene: The Oval Office]] / Loren: Mr President, we have a situation. Martians are invading Earth. / Allosaurus: Raaarrrhh? / Loren: They have superior technology and intellects. Humanity doesn't stand a chance, sir. / Allosaurus: Raaarrrhh? / Loren: They're demanding total dominion over Earth and...
 
Irregular Webcomic! #1551 [[James Stud and Honey reach a vent at the end of the duct they are crawling through.]] / [[Stud pushes the vent open.]] / [[They climb out of the vent and down into an empty room.]] / Stud: So. Now what? / Honey: Save the world! / Stud: Oh, right...
Irregular Webcomic! #1552 Kyros: [[hanging on precariously to the edge of the shattered Bridge as the flaming whip of the Balrog drags him down]] Fly, you fools! / [[Kyros falls.]] / [[The others look on in shocked silence.]] / Lambert: [[turning to Mordekai]] I always knew Kyros would go out with an insult.
Irregular Webcomic! #1553 Minnesota Jones: [[leading the way through the Vatican]] The library is this way. / Monty: I suppose you've been here before? / Minnesota Jones: I helped Leo XIII catalogue part of the Vatican antiquities collection. / Monty: Of course you did... / Minnesota Jones: I snuck out one or two pieces for...
Irregular Webcomic! #1554 Shady black market weapons dealer: [[showing off an imposing looking heavy weapon]] This plasma cannon is a quantum leap ahead of its competitors! / Iki Piki: That little difference, huh? / Shady black market weapons dealer: What? / Iki Piki: A quantum is the smallest possible unit of change. It's...
Irregular Webcomic! #1555 [[scene: Head Death's desk]] / Head Death: SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. / Head Death: HE WRESTLED THE FROG WHILE BREAKING THE THERMOMETER AND INHALING THE MERCURY FUMES. / Head Death: WHEREUPON THE FROG STUCK ITS HAND DOWN HIS THROAT, CAUSING HIM TO LICK ITS POISONOUS SKIN MUCUS... / Head Death: ......
 
Irregular Webcomic! #1556 Lambert: [[staring over the shatterd Bridge of Khazad-Doom, where Kyros has fallen]] Oh no! The Balrog killed Kyros. Wait... Hooray, the Balrog killed Kyros! / Alvissa: Lambert! How can you talk about our fr-... our companion like that? / Mordekai: Oh, come on, Alvissa. Can you honestly think of anyone...
Irregular Webcomic! #1557 Ishmael: The easiest way to invade Earth is by fiat. / Martian 1: Fiat? / Ishmael: Watch. [[aims a camera at the Martians]] / [sound]: Click! / Ishmael: [[sitting at computer]] First I post your photo to Flickr. Second, I blog on LJ that Martians have landed on campus. Third, I put a genuine Martian...
Irregular Webcomic! #1558 Honey: Quick! Into this radiation suit. You have to stop Dr No from toppling the imminent US rocket launch! / Stud: [[putting on radiation suit]] How do you know so much about it? This is highly confidential information. / Honey: You told me earlier when you were trying to impress me. / Stud: You...
Irregular Webcomic! #1559 Minnesota Jones: I say, how did the Vatican get hold of that?! [[pointing to a large bronze statue of a wild cat]] / Monty: The snow leopard statue? / Minnesota Jones: This came from my dig at Troy! It's a likeness of Priam's favourite pet, one of a dozen snow leopards that Dymas gave as a wedding gift. / Minnesota...
Irregular Webcomic! #1560 Jamie: There have been several unsubstantiated rumours on the net that Martians have invaded Earth. This myth is a complete load of... / Adam: [[on a computer]] Jamie! An e-mail just came in from a viewer. / Jamie: What does it say? / Adam: "We wish to use your bank account to transfer the entire treasury...
 

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