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| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Batman: "Bat-rope!" / Bruce Wayne: "Man, this works great. I wonder if we could use it to fight crime." / Header: Earlier...
/ Woman (to Batman): "So, we need to talk about our relationship." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1720#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Bad Social Move:
/ Making puns that don't relate to the situation / Man: "My wife just died."
/ Woman: "It's a CAT-tastrophe!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1721#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "I'm a vegetarian, sir, because I don't need to murder to eat." / Header: Somewhere...on a soybean farm...
/ Mouse #1: "Run! Tractors!"
/ Mouse #2: "Where's mama?!"
/ Mouse #3: "I don't know! Just run!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1722#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man #1: "Sir! Sir! There's a problem with the funs we jsut shipped!"
/ Man #2: "They get extremely hot when fired!"
/ Man #2: "Oh dear God." / Caption: There was a bit of a snag in the heat-seeking bullets program. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1723#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Oh! Oh, yeah! That's fairly good! That's not so bad. You're the third best sex partner I've ever had!" / Caption: Wonder Woman no longer uses The Lasso of Truth for bondage play. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1724#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "I was a really good restaurant patron today. I mean REALLY good. Polite? Friendly? Outgoing?" / Caption: Social Faux Pas #12:
/ Trying to get a waiter to tip you. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1725#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Each generation has had some form of bigotry to reject, but then ironically harbors a bigotry that the following generation must reject."
/ Woman: "What sort of bigotry do you think our kids will see in us." / Man: "I think we may be the last. We accept gender, race, sexual orientation..."
/ Woman:... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1726#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Alien: "People of Earth! We bring you a challenge! If you fail, your civilization is forfeit!" / Alien: "Behold! Mindless point-and-click video games!" / [ Humans look stupefied ] / Alien: "I just...I just..."
/ Alien #2: "It's okay, man. Don't let it upset you."
/ Alien: "What the hell do they do all... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1727#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Pinocchio with his nose attached to the trigger of a rifle, which points at his face as he says, "I want to live!" / Caption: The "Most Horrific Image" contest came to an early conclusion. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1728#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Oh, yeah. Sorry. It's a bet. I have to do that whenever you say "Oh, wow! Me too!" / Caption: Shirley was not impressed by The First Date Drinking Game. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1729#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Grandpa: "And so good children get presents and naughty children get lumps of coal." / Granddaughter: "Wait. Wait, so all the worst kids in the world are given flammable rocks at the same time?" / [ Grandpa looks stunned ] / [ A neighborhood is ablaze ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1730#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A beanstalk grows out of a man's stomach ] / Caption: In Jack's defense, "Magic Beans" sounds like an awesome drug. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1731#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "I'll spin this globe, and you throw the dart. Wherever it lands, we'll cast away our cares, and go there tonight. For love, my darling. For love." / Caption: [ Magnetic Dart and Globe Kit! Look Romantic! Always hits cheap part of Utah! ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1732#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A spaceship flies away from Earth ] / [ The top of the ship breaks away and goes to Enceladus ] / [ The top lands on the surface ] / [ The ship drills into the surface ] / [ The ship drops into water ] / [ The ship encounters some three-eyed alien fish ] / [ A fast-food restaurant has a sign... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1733#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "Oh hey, have you seen my watch?" / Caption: Bumping into my gynecologist outside her office suddenly got a lot more uncomfortable. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1734#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Friday.
/ Man: "So, senators, that report we released was fake - a test of your true feelings. And, well, we're not exactly floored over here." / Header: Thursday.
/ [ A newspaper headline reads "Senate revokes all funding for medical research" ] / Header: Wednesday.
/ [ The Journal of Epidemiology... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1735#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A man shows another man a piece of paper that reads, "mmm, that feels nice, young lady." ] / Caption: One of the hardest things to recreate on the desert island was cybersex. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1736#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Debunk internet ads while teaching mathematics / [ "Question:
/ If a pill could actually double your penis, how many pills would it take to reach the edge of the solar system? (answer on bottom)" ] / Caption: ~4.65 pills http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1737#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Eugonia strikes again!"
/ Woman: "There's no goddess of ejaculation."
/ Man: "How do you know?" / Caption: Life was better before monotheism. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1738#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: 0 years dating:
/ [ A piece of paper reads, "do you like me?" and has boxes for "yes" and "no" ] / Header: 1 year dating:
/ [ A piece of paper reads, "do you like me?" and has boxes for "yes," "no," and "no, but I pity you, which is similar" ] / Header: 2 years dating:
/ [ A piece of paper reads,... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1739#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "World pe-" / [ Her boobs start to grow ] / [ Her boobs get even bigger ] / Woman: "You're a dick." / Header: Earlier...
/ Man: "And the genie said I could wish for anything!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1740#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Caveman #1: "Hey, I bet I can draw 1,000 dicks before you can draw 1,000 boobs."
/ Caveman #2: "A game of dick-boob, is it?" / Header: 10,000 years later
/ Man: "We believe we've discovered a Neolithic fertility cult." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1741#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A venn diagram has one circle labeled "acceptable pet names," another labeled "professional titles," and the intersection labeled "most irritating things you can call your wife: examples: Dr. Sweetie, Sergeant Cutiepie, and Her Honor, Judge Sexypants." ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1742#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: It was a mistake to intervene in my brother's suicide / Man: "Oh my God! We look exactly alike! Which twin do I kill!?" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1743#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Wait...you want to fund math education with a program that only makes money because poor people aren't taught statistics?" / Caption: Mathematicians are no longer allowed at the state lottery funds debate. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1744#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ Cupid shoots an arrow ] / [ A man gets shot by the arrow ] / Man (to woman): "I love you." / [ Friendo shoots wet mashed potatoes ] / [ The woman gets hit by the potatoes ] / Woman (to man): "You're a nice person." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1745#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Movie Phrases Don't Work in Real Life
/ Man: "Don't you see? There is no alimony. The alimony...why...it's in your heart." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1746#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man #1: "This product needs a new name. Nobody wants a product that by definition does nothing!"
/ Man #2: "Wait! I've got an idea!" / Caption: [ The product formally named "Placebo!" is now "Herbal Placebo!" ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1747#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Debate Tips:
/ Slippery slope arguments usually slip both ways / Man: "We can't! If we illegalize gay marriage, all marriage is in danger! Next thing, we'll have to illegalize straight marriage, and then marriage to Jesus!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1748#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "STUCK!? STUCK!? COME UNSTUCK YOU SON OF A BITCH! COME UNSTUCK! AAUUAUAAAAUGH! AAAUAHAAGH!" / Caption: Cocaine vending machines were a bad idea. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1749#comic |
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