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| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Astronaut 1: Wait a minute! This isn't the moon! This is Mars! / Astronaut 2: Oh no! How are we going to break it to the public? / Caption: That's right!
/ The moon landing was a fake! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=120 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Nike Orphanage / Sign: "Just dead parents it!" / Man: I'd like to try out one of your kids. / Reverend Sanders: Sir, these are children! Not...used cars! / He knew Reverend Sanders meant well, but every time this conversation occurred, Chevy died a little inside. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=121 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Sign: POLITI-TALK / Mr. Leeman: Oh come on Mr. Leeman! Are you actually arguing that TV forces people to be violent?! / Pundit: Listen, all I know is I ran down six kids on the way to work today. Do you wanna be the one to explain that to their parents? http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=122 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: I'm sorry Jim. You're nice and all, but these readings are just all wrong. / Jim: Baby! I can pressure change! I swear! / Caption: In the future, love is determined by barometric pressure. Think it's silly? Well, look how well your system is working out. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=123 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Fireman: Captain! We've run out of water!
/ Fire Captain: Well isn't there any liquid we can use?!
/ Fireman: Sigh. Nothing but the gas in the tank.
/ Fire Captain: LET'S DO IT! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=124 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man/Husband: Do you ever lie awake at night wondering if marriage was a complete mistake?
/ Woman: ...no...
/ Man: ...Me neither. 'Night! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=125 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Homeless Man: Mr. Pennybags, could you please not run over my legs today? / Mr: Pennybags: Sorry m'boy, but beggars can't be choosers. / Car Sound: vroom vroom!!! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=126 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Cowboy: I'm lookin' for a feller named Tumorneck! / Bartender: I don't know how to tell you this, son, but Tumorneck is...Dead. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=127 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: Oh sweetie!
/ What would you say love is like?
/ Man: Probably a lot like shuttin' up. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=128 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman's Sign: (Greenpeace Save Earth Now!) / Man's Sign: (Burn Greenpeace Now!) / Man: We're a small organization, but we have big plans. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=129 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Professor: Please fill out these professor evalutaion forms. Feel free to express your feelings, as these are completely confidential. / Chason: Wait a minute! If these are confidential, how come there's a line that says "name" next to it? / Professor: That's... uh... so we know which line not to... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics_old&id=129 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Movie Screen: Coming this easter
/ A mel Gibson film
/ Passion of the christe II: / Zombie Jesus! / Caption: "Do unto others as you would have them BRAAAAINS!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=130 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | James: I have a theory that the average college student doesn't know what clean is, but merely recognizes the scent of soap. / James: To test, I'm secretly replacing Zach's laundry detergent with fabric softener. / Title bar: 3 months later... / James: That's funny the detergent container is still... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics_old&id=130 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: This is the last time I go out with you! / Caption: She'd been saying that all night, ever since she found out that I'd poisoned her drink. YES. I GET IT. YOU'LL BE DEAD. HA HA HA.
/ Geez! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=131 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Zach: I hate professional advisement mettings.
/ James: Why? Because they're boring? / Zach: No. It's just that I always feel like they're talking over my head. / Professor 1: Hey, are your students D-U-M-B like mine?
/ Professor 2: Ugh! They're at it again...
/ Professor 3: What the heck is a deeyoo... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics_old&id=131 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Yogi Bear: Hey Booboo! I stole another pic-a-nic basket! / Booboo bear: Sorry Yogi. There's nothing in here but insulin shots. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=132 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Satan: Welcome to hell, Mr. Johnson. / Caption: Of course, in the real Hell, there are no devils, no pitchforks, no fire and brimstone - no, nothing so simple..
/ Sadly, you'll be going to the fake Hell where they do have all that stuff. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=133 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | SMBC PRESENTS "DATING TIPS" / Man: Sandy, will you go to the prom with me? / Sandy: Me? Really? Of course I will! / Caption:
/ Dating Tip#1:
/ If you take a girl with polio to the prom, you leave with a cheerleader who thinks you're sensitive! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=134 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Father: I'm sorry, son. Mr. Ted is... deceased / Son: Yeah, it was just great being a doctor's kid. Thanks for asking. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=135 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Caption: Being a brain in a pan is a lot less glamourous than my life as a movie star. But hey, I can't complain. I mean, apparently I can still talk or write or something. That's pretty cool, right? http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=136 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Grandpa: I have a confession to make! I've been faking Alzheimer's Disease! / Caption: Every morning for fifteen years, grampa woke up and said the same thing. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=137 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Father: Good morning breeders! / It was becoming increasingly apparent that Gary would have preffered a son. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=138 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Dr. Stern, DDS.
/ Marriage Counselor / Man/Husband: I really don't see why we need this. I told you I'd pay for a facelift! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=139 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman/Mother/Wife: For Jonny, waffles. For Susie, Pancakes. And, for daddy, a bucket of skunk placentas! / Caption: So, I guess my infidelity was out of the bag. On the plus side, the skunk placentas were remarkably tender. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=140 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: Son! You should listen to your mother. / Son: Which mother? Barely three months dead mother, or new mother who looks eerily similar to old mother, and even has the same first name, but who, deep down, you know can never fill the empty space where your heart used to be? / Caption: "...the second... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=141 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Boy 1: I'll be an elven wizard! / Boy 2: I'll be a dwarven warrior! / Father: I'll be a guy who can put down the Jack Daniels for just one goddamned day! / Caption: This was the last time we let dad join our "Dungeons and Dragons" game. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=142 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | God: GRAHHH! I AM GOD-BLOR! / Caption: In more recent versions of the Bible, this episode has been omitted. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=143 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: Not tonight honey! I just started..."raising the red flag..." / Caption: "Oh great. First she's frigid. Now she's a commie." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=144 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Dr. Manklow: Yes! Yes! Soon they'll all be dead! / (a vat labeled "Toddler Poison") / Caption: Dr. Manklow's toxic formula killed off all the children in the world. But, as luck would have it, he released the poison on the same day that aliens secretly took over the bodies of all Earth's children.
/ His... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=145 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Sign: Today: Orphan Skeet! / Caption: Admittedly, your honor, I occasionally wondered if I was doing the right thing. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=146 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Grandma: Aww. She has her grandfather's eyes! / Father: So ya slept with my wife, eh? / Grandpa: Damn! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=147 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: Can I take the hook out of my eye yet? / Woman: Nope! / Man: Man she's lucky she's hot... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=148 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man 1: She's got a real hourglass figure. / Man 1 and 2: Chortle chortle! / Caption: What was less funny was how Cynthia died alone at age 35 due to a congenital heart defect. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=149 |
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