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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Mailman Ed: THE...MAIL...MUST...GET...THROUGH! / Caption: Secretly, Ed wondered if there were an easier way to deliver mail-order weaponry.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=240
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Woman: How'd it go? / Man: Well, I didn't hear anything negative! / Caption: I guess my humor wasn't taking the edge off my syphillis test results.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=241
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Tunnel of Love / Woman: Oh Fred! This is SO roMANtic! / Caption: "Wait, this isn't the Tunnel of Hate. She's getting mixed signals!"
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=242
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Anchorman: AND THEIR YOUNG LIVES WERE TRAGICALLY CUT SHORT AS THE BLAZING INFERNO CONSUMED... / Caption: Not. Wearing. Pants.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=243
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man and Woman: Honey I wanted to say - / Oh, heh... / I have to tell you - / We keep saying the same - / ... / I...alright - / Okay, I - / You first! / No, you first! / ... / ... / Woman: My water broke. / Man: I think we should see other people.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=244
 
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Woman: So, tell me - what are your feelings toward your mother? / Boy: I don't think that's really a fair question... / Caption: Never get psychoanalyzed by a parent.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=245
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Explorer: I claim this land for Portug - what the?! / Dammit! Who switched the flag?! / Caption: The British Empire grew rapidly.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=246
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Professor: AS SOCRATES ONCE SAID, "MWRAURAGHGRA! MARRARR-R-RRAGH!" "MWAHHH!" / Caption: What if Socrates had been a bear?
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=247
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man 1: My head hurts a little. / Lloyd: HOW ABOUT SOME TYLENOL!? / Label: Rat Poison / Caption: It's tough having Lloyd as a roommate. On the plus side, now I know why my wife is dead.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=248
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man: HA! / Man's foot: KICK! / Dog: BARK! / Caption: I'm beginning to wonder if Fred had an ulterior motive in buying me a puppy for Christmas.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Fred: Nature is so amazing... Look at that cloud. It's shaped just like a crashing plane. / Wait a minute!. / Oh no! / Caption: Fred had forgotten his wife's birthday.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man: It's so nice to finally meet you. / Sock Puppet Rodney: Run! She's too fat! Run before she eats you! / Man: Shutup Rodney / Sock Puppet Rodney: You shutup! / Man: No you shutup! / Caption: Shirley glanced about nervously, beginning to sweat all over. "Geez, this is awkward," she muttered to herself,...
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Seniors Bingo Night / B-7! / Crowd of seniors: BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! BINGO! / Bingo caller: Oh God...they sold us a defective kit...be cool...stay calm...how many toasters do we have? / Caption: Even the most senile of...
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=252
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man: Excuse me, I just saw you walk by, and I...I just...do you believe in love at first sight? / Caption: In my excitement, I hadn't noticed the seeing eye dog.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=253
Scouts Honor Man: I didn't kill my wife! You have to believe me! Scouts honor! / Jury of girl scouts: GASP! murmur murmur... / A hush fell over the jury. Foreman Susie squinted in the defendant's direction, rolling her loyalty badge over and over in her right hand. "Alright," she whispered to herself, "I'll...
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Steve: Death! / Death: Steve! I have come for you! / Steve: Oh no! / Death: Wait...is today the 24th or the 25th? / Steve: 24th / Death: Oh...nevermind.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Father: Bobby, I think you're old enough now to know - Santa isn't real / Bobby: But he just - / Santa Claus: MMF! MMF! / Father: YOU SAW NOTHING! / Caption: No, Santa isn't real. He hasn't been real since December 24th, 1986
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=256
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man: This just in! / Newspaper: Blind date has unreasonably high standards based on own appearance.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=257
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Teacher: Class, I want you to know that I didn't use the letter-based system to grade your papers. I think it's a silly, unrealistic method. I mean, you can't just boil an individual down to an A- or a B+, can you? / Anyway, here are your papers. Billy Anderson? / Billy Anderson: Here! / Notes on...
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=258
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Johnny's Twin: Susan, Will you marry me? / Susan: Oh Johnny! Yes! Yes! / Caption: Thee-thousand dollars later, it's still the best prank I ever pulled on my twin brother.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=259
 
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Steve: I don't need you anymore... / Voices from the crowd: Alright! / We knew you could do it! / Yeh! / We're so proud of you, son! / Caption: Steve would later claim he was speaking exclusively to the third cigarette from the left.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=260
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Woman: Hi honey! What do you think of my - / Caption: Apparently, Ed wasn't very impressed with my new haircut.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=262
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Susie: Daddy! There's a monster in my closet! / Father: A monster?! / Caption: Fortunately, Susie's doors lock from the outside.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=263
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Woman: The stork! Our son is here! / Caption: We were both glad when the stork finally gave back our baby.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=264
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Doctor: Here you are, Mrs. Sanderson. / Mrs. Sanderson: Oh thank you doctor, I... Wait, didn't I give birth to a human baby? / Doctor (thought bubble): Uh oh. She can't know that you lost the baby! Oh God. She's looking at you! Quick! Say something clever! / Caption: "Uhhh... No?"
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=265
 
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Man: Doc! I'm havin' these really bad *erk* chest pains! / Doctor: Wow. Chest pains. That's Real original. / Caption: Creativty 2, Weeks to live 1, Style! 6.5
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=266
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal The Grinch: They're singing! They're singing! They're actually singing! Their carolers still caroling! Their sleigh bells still ringing! They're dancing a dance! They're singing a song! Could it be I've misjudged Christmas love all along? / Caption: The Grinch was, however still refusing to give...
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=267
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Doctor: Hey, let's not dwell on the negatives here, okay? Several parts of your surgery WERE done correctly.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=268
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Devil on the shoulder: Kill the children! / Civic: Drive a Civic! / Caption: The advent of psychic advertising was not without its drawbacks. / Fortunately, Ted soon figured out a way to combine the two view points.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=269
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal American: Damn. Heads. / Soviet: Damn. / Caption: Thus began the Cold War.
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