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| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Pilot: And, as we begin our descent, you'll notice the little houses getting bigger and bigger...
/ And bigger...
/ Duuude... http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=60 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Dwarf: What are you doing?! Sleeping Beauty's over there! You're kissing Ralph, the dead leper! / Prince: Urgh. I always do this. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=61 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Son: You know, I like you almost as much as 9 to 5 dad. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=62 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Snake in Woman's Eye: You can't trust her! / Caption: Something in her eyes told me I couldn't trust her. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=63 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Giant Robot: LOVE EACHOTHER! / Dog: ARF? / Caption: Weiner dog breeding just hasn't been the same since giant robots conquered Germany. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=64 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Moloch:I am Moloch! Destroyer of worlds! / Old Woman: This coupon for veggie wieners is expired Moloch. Would you mind paying full price? / Moloch: Would you mind the death of your FIRST BORN?!! / Old Woman: I've...never been married. / Moloch: Oh...I'm sorry... / Old Woman: ... / Moloch: ... / Old Woman: ... / Moloch: GAHAHAHAHA! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=65 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: You know, it might just be the medication talking, but you're looking pretty ashtray cranberry octo baxopopopooophbfff... / Caption: And then she kissed me. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=66 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Caption: I think I'll pick...the red one. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=67 |
| Valentine's Day | Man: You shot me with a crossbow! That's not what you do on Valentine's Day! Don't you know anything? http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=68 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: What have I done?! / Note: (Note to self: Don't kill Steve) http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=69 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Son: Parents, I just killed your only daughter. Oh, also I'm gay. / Just kidding! Only half of what I said is true! Can you guess which half? http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=70 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Student: Professor, why are there trap doors under our chairs? / Caption: Ahh, the first day of teaching Natural Selection is always the best day. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=71 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Lawyer: You people are all crazy! / Caption: Steve's lawyer tries the insanity defense. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=72 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Alan: But science proves nothing! We only see what we're programmed to see! That's why poetry is the only way to transcend reality, and understand truth. / Caption: Beth's "Sonnet on how Alan doesn't know what he's talking about" was surpassed only by her later work, "Ballad of shut your trap Alan, or I'm dumping you." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=73 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Father/Husband: Well, I'm off to have another battle with the toilet...
/ Woman/Wife: ...okay honey...
/ Daughter: Why is daddy always so gross?
/ Baby: Goo? / Caption: We thought he was joking about constipation, until we found his body on the bathroom floor, a porcelain dagger in his back. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=74 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | CAM 1: Main Hall
/ RECORDING / Caption: "Hey Jon! There's cameras on the ceiling! Should we steal them too?" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=75 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | SMBC PRESENTS: Times when you should have elaborated / What was SAID:
/ Woman: I think we should consider putting my mother in a home.
/ Man: Maybe you're right honey... / What was THOUGHT:
/ Nursing Home
/ Funeral Home http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=76 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Sign: Happy Birthday / Man: Thanks Mom! / Mother: Oh, I'm sure it's horse pee compared to the other gifts you got. / Caption: Ten seconds later, wrist-deep in horse urine, I realized it wasn't even my birthday. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=77 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Father: Dude! Can I get a high five up in here?!
/ Son: *snicker* Whatever you want Dad... / Caption: It was the best practical joke I ever played. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=78 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Rachelle: I love you Chason.
/ Chason: Aww, I love you two. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=79 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Angel: Quick! Give your soul to me! / Man/Last Soul: Oh no, I'm not falling for that one again. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=80 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Pac Man: OMP-OMP-OMP!*
/ Mrs. Pac Man: OMP-OMP-OMP!** / Caption:
/ Translations:
/ * I love you!
/ ** OMP-OMP-OMP! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=81 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Painting: ANGST / Woman: Wow, he's so deep! / Man: What are you talking about?! It's poop on a canvas! It's literally poop on a canvas! / Woman: But look what it spells! Did you see what it spells? It spells something! / Caption: Later on in our date, she tripped on a branch and scraped her knee.
/ I didn't help her up. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=82 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man/Father: And this is for probably growing up to be an abusive father! http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=83 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Old Man: Is it Halloween already? Gee kids, I must have forgotten to get candy. You see, I have this condition where I -
/ Boy 1: We're Orphans.
/ Old Man: Well, I guess I could walk to the store... though my cane just broke and I -
/ Boy 2: ORPHANS. / Caption: Our parents called him "mentally handicapped."
/ Every friday afternoon, we called him "candybox." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=84 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: Hey! You're ugly! ... NOT! / Woman: That wasn't funny the ninth time, and it's not funny now! / Caption: It was definately funny the seventeenth time, and she still didn't laugh. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=85 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Doctor: His condition is serious, but its location is hilarious! / Caption: The lighter side of colorectal cancer. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=86 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman/Wife: Mmm, orange juice. / Caption: So I divorced her. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=87 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Scientist/Doctor: Interesting... / Baby: Gah! / Notepad: Babies are stupid http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=88 |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: Oh, sorry, that must have been taken before I had the pig grafted onto my face. Wheee! / Caption: The trouble with Internet dating. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=89 |
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