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| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "I wish you wouldn't shake that around after we make love." / Caption: [ A picture with a tip jar ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1233#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Superman (thinking): "I must stop Lex Luthor at any cost. Even if it means my own life." / Caption: The costume made my suicide way more fun. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1234#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A man runs from flying weapons ]
/ Man: "She means nothing to me! Nothing!" / Caption: Most men are aware of Women's Intuition.
/ Most men are not aware of Women's Telekinesis. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1235#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: It's not a problem, it's performance art! / Man (holding a beer in each hand): "Who wants to see my impression of a lousy father?!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1236#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Oh yeah? Well YOUR mama's so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1237#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man #1: "You can't just mix and match slogans and images."
/ Man #2: "Hey, they're all positive messages." / Caption: [ An advertisement shows a little boy smoking from a hash pipe with the slogan "Be yourself." ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1238#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "Before we start...are you sure you aren't mad?"
/ Man: "I'm not mad."
/ Woman: "That sounded mad. I think you're mad."
/ Man: "I told you, I'm not mad."
/ Woman: "*sigh*...okay..." / Caption: My relationship with the Incredible Hulk was brief. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1239#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | header: Nature is Unfair. Case in point:
/ The unprotected sex talk / Header: Female sign / Mom: "And then, a living human will explode out of your genitals while loved ones watch and tell you how great it is." / Header: Male sign / Dad: "High five!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1240#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Couples therapy got off to a bad start... / Woman: "Here's my impression of sex with J-oops! No more impression tonight." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1241#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Mayonnaise gun! Mayonnaise gun!" / Header: Earlier...
/ Man: "Oh, hey Ted. You know what's weird?" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1242#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Batman: "Oh...h-hey...wow...hi, Riddler. I, uh...I haven't solved your riddle yet...maybe...maybe we just shouldn't discuss it at all for a few months..." / Caption: [ A note from the Riddler reads "Do you still love me? heart, Riddler" ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1243#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Smiling earns you many friends...and I f--ked your mom."
/ Woman: "I think maybe 'in bed' works better..." / Caption: Nobody likes me new version of the fortune cookie joke. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1244#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man #1: 'I demand a threesome!"
/ Man #2 (thinking): "Okay...this practical joke has gone on long enough." / Header: One week earlier... / Man #2: "Is he hypnotized?"
/ Therapist: "Yes."
/ Man #2: "Tell him he's Jesus Christ!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1245#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A graph with a y-axis labeled "specialness of individuals" and an x-axis labeled "world population" has a downward sloping curve and an arrow pointing to a low point towards the end labeled "you" and another further down the line labeled "you next year." ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1246#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: The problem with dogma:
/ Unintended consequences / Priest: "Oh, I'd like to set you free to being Heaven on Earth, but you see...after all these years eating the Eucharist...I've developed A TASTE..."
/ [ He flicks open a knife in front of a tied-up Jesus ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1247#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Magician: "Yeah, and I did that while walking. That's like two magic tricks to you guys." / Caption: I'm no longer allowed inside the school for the disabled. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1248#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Hey! You know how you love bunny rabbits and ant farms?!"
/ Woman: "Y-yes..."
/ Man: "Well, I got your two favorite - uh...uh..." / Caption: "I got you ants." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1249#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Man: "Whaddya say we...get a little house on a cool stretch of beach in the northwest, and live together, just you and I."
/ Woman: "Oh, Tom!" / Header: Soon... / Man: "I call top half!"
/ [ He stands on a staircase with a sign that reads "no girls allowed." ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1250#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Dad: "You know that thing you do in the shower every morning? Well, you do it in a vat of phospholipids." / Caption: In the future, the sex talk is a lot shorter. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1251#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Scientist #1: "You...y-you..."
/ Scientist #2: "Atomized him." / Caption: August 9:
/ Our wedgie research grant may be in danger. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1252#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "Me date you? When pigs fly!" / [ Man ponders ] / [ Man tinkers in a lab ] / [ Man reads "Pig/Bird Genetics." ] / [ Man performs surgery. ] / [ Man looks happy as he sees his flying pig. ] / [ Man releases his flying pig out the window. ] / [ Woman looks scared as she looks to the sky. ] / [ Newspaper headline reads "Woman Crushed by Mutilated Pig." ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1253#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "I want you to know that the following burst of laughter has nothing to do with the size of your genitals, and in fact relates to an amusing comic strip I read this morning." / Caption: "BAHAHAHA! What a tiny penis...has Garfield." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1254#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | [ A woman holds a Soldermaster and a hammer, but her speech bubble is empty. ] / Caption:
/ Best Case Scenario:
/ "I finished your supercomputer!" / Worst Case Scenario:
/ "I invented a new kind of sex!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1255#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Urban Legends:
/ Love is beautiful / Woman: "Wow! You're a racist too?!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1256#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Son: "Mom, dad, I have a confession! None of this is real! You're both in a virtual reality machine in my basement! I'm using your body heat as a power source! I'm a monster! A monster!" / Dad (to his son in a virtual reality machine): "Uh...that's...that's horrible, son..." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1257#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Doctor: "Hey, it's the expectant parents! Would you like to see pictures of the baby?!" / Caption: The Andersons almost immediately agreed to the ransom. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1258#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Boy (wishing on a shooting star): "I wish everyone was happy." / Doctor: "You children are all dead."
/ Parents (looking happy): "NOOOOOOO!" http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1259#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Header: Natural Selection: Hard at work / Header: The cheetah...
/ [ A cheetah running across the panel ] / Header: The bear...
/ [ An angry bear growls. ] / Header: The human...
/ Man: "Are you on the pill?"
/ Woman (holding a bottle of Aspirin): "I'm on A pill." http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1260#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Woman: "We've done it! A grand unified theory! Physics is complete!"
/ Man: "So...what do we do with all the physicists?" / Woman: "Hahaha! It's not as if there's suddenly no use for thoughtful, intelligent people." / [ People sit on a conveyor belt that takes them through flames and makes them hamburgers. ] http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1261#comic |
| Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal | Cavewoman: "No...no...it can't be..."
/ Caveman: "The gods wouldn't be so cruel..." / Caption: 12,242 BC:
/ The sex-pregnancy connection is discovered. http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1262#comic |
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