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Mountain Time 59 Bear: I have 31 hammers. / Guy: That's a significant number of hammers. / Guy: A few more hammers, and you'll be the king of Hammerland. / King Bear: People of Hammerland... / Peasant 1: King Bear is about to speak! / Peasant 2: Raise your hammers to the king! / King Bear: I hereby decree there be four hammers...
a class="searchlink" href="http://mountaincomics.com/2009/06/29/mountain-time-61/">http://mountaincomics.com/2009/06/29/mountain-time-61/ [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!]
Mountain Time 62 [[There are two kids, and there are two kites]] / Woman: It's so nice to see kids flying kites. / Man: Huh? No, those are wild kites. The kids are trying to lasso them. / [[Indeed, a kid tries to lasso a kite]] / Man: They're acting on the instinctive drive to tether anything that soars free. / Woman:...
Mountain Time 75 Scientist: I just invented the pogonoose! / Scientist: It has the properties of a pogo stick and a noose. / Guy: No way can that thing function as a pogo stick. / Glass Cleaner (thinking): That's what she said. / Scientist: Wanna test its noose capabilities? / Guy: No! Help! Surf Rat! / Serf Rat: You...
a class="searchlink" href="http://mountaincomics.com/2009/08/07/five-part-special-part-10/">http://mountaincomics.com/2009/08/07/five-part-special-part-10/ [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!]
 
Mountain Time 81 COUNTING TO ONE / Guy: Uh... six? / MATH IS NOT SUBJECTIVE / Host: On my panel tonight are: / Host: Socrates the Turkey, / Socrates the Turkey: What is a panel? If it's wood, should it go on a station wagon? / Host: Bertram, a horseman of the Apocalypse / Bertram: Howdy. / Host: and Agoraphobic Hamster,...
Mountain Time 82 Indianacorn Jones & Shortround the Acorn, in unison: WHOA! / Indiana & shortround, again in unison: Oof! / Shortround: What's going on down there? / Acorn Priest: Now I will read from the Necronomacorn to summon Diabloak. / Indiana: We've gotta get outta here! / Acorn Priest: ...absentum laedit cum...
Mountain Time 83 Dude 1: This is a tape dispenser. / Dude 2: Yes. It is. / Dude 1: It is the Tape Dispenser of Verisimilitude. / Dude 2: Yes. It is. / Dude 1: It will guide our spirits to their eternal destination. / Dude 2: Yes. It will. / Dude 1: Our spirit guide is changing forms. / Dude 2: Yes. / Dude 2: It is now...
Mountain Time 84 [[Dave and some other guy are just standing around]] / Guy: What's the deal with moths and lightbulbs? / [[Dave's head comes off]] / Guy: Uh, Dave, your head's come off. / [[Yeah, I just said that...]] / Dave: Ouagadougou! / Guy: The capital of Burkina Faso? / [[Dave's head is flying!!!]] / [[Dave's...
Mountain Time 85 King: Slay the dreadful dragon, and you may marry my daughter, Princess Online Dating. / [[Knight gallops away on his horse]] / Cowboy: Whoa, there, pardner. There ain't no such things as dragons. / Cowboy: Why, the very notion of knights an' kings is as outdated as the powdered wig. / Cowboy: In...
 
Mountain Time 86 [[A pine candle in a jar is resting upside-down on a couple of blocks]] / Guy 1: What are you doing? / Guy 2: I'm testing to see if the sun can melt this candle. / Guy 1: Why? / Guy 2: Why did man go to the moon? / Guy 1: That was a response to a challenge mankind has felt since he first walked the...
Mountain Time 87 Fly: This second is the first second of the rest of this minute. This second is the first second of the... / AGORAPHOBIC HAMSTER / ANSWERS THE DOOR / Agoraphobic Hamster: Hey! Get out of my title shot! / <> / Agoraphobic Hamster: I'm coming! / <> [[A Wizard appears]] / Agoraphobic Hamster:...
Mountain Time 88 Guy: Have you gotten the latest edition of AYTAC magazine? / [[Magazine cover: Are You Thinking About Cows? August 09 // What your cow thoughts say about you...p.46]] / Otto: Yeah. I took the quiz on page 33, and it said I was moderately thinking about cows. / Guy: So you're a mediocre moo-moo muller? / Otto:...
Mountain Time 89 Dude: Paul, I'd like you to meet Donna the Bears. / Paul: Bears? She looks like a single human to me. / Dude: She has multiple personalities, but they're all bears. / Donna: Rarr! / Paul: Better not tell her where Salmon-arms Johnny lives. / [[Donna sniffs her hand]] / Meanwhile / Salmon-arms Johnny:...
a class="searchlink" href="http://mountaincomics.com/2009/09/07/mountain-time-93/">http://mountaincomics.com/2009/09/07/mountain-time-93/ [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!]
 
Mountain Time 95 TODAY'S COMIC: / How accidental mispronunciation can be caused be light-speed hover gremlins. / L.S.H.G.: Like me! / Man: I have to pee. / [[A light-speed hover gremlin shows up with a u and an accent, and throws them into the man's speech to make:]] / Man: I have toup?e. / Someone offscreen: Thank God!...
Mountain Time 96 [[There is a crane]] / Guy: Oh, uh, here comes the crane again. / [[The crane grabs him]] / Guy: It keeps picking me up. / [[It picks him up]] / Guy: Hey crane! I'd really rather be stationary. On the ground. / Guy: No -- don't put me down there! / Later / Guy: And so it dropped me in the part...
The Unstartled Giraffe 10 3 DAYS LATER / 2.4 BILLION PEOPLE DEAD / TOOTHPASTE / TRASH BAGS / EGGS / BUTTER / ROCKET SAUCE / Spear Guy: So have you thought of any -- um, what's that? / Un-Sweaty Guy: I stole a rhino from the zoo. / Spear Guy: So the cops are after you like crazy now, huh? / Un-Sweaty Guy: Yeah. / Spear Guy: How are...
The Unstartled Giraffe 11 Un-Sweaty Guy: Ok, you look like a dapper seahorse. Now go woo Helen Hunt and inject her with enough ketamine to drop a brachiosaurus. / And so / Spear Guy (dressed as a dapper seahorse): Oh Helen! / Helen Hunt: ?! / Spear Guy: Why don't you take a break from killing everything in sight and dance with...
The Unstartled Giraffe 12 Spear Guy: Well, we tried sedating Helen Hunt with drugs from the zoo, but it only made her stronger. / Spear Guy: Her death toll is over 8 billion. She's killed everyone in the world at least 1.15 times. / Un-Sweaty Guy: Traffic is still bad. / Construction Barrel of Justice: Take me to this "zoo." / At...
 
Mountain Time 235 Dude: Hey Dave, check out my new heavy-duty stapler. / Dave: The mind is the most powerful stapler of all. / Dude: Oh yeah? This one can do 215 sheets and -- EERGH! / Dude: Are you stapling me with your mind?! / Dave: No. / (Other) Dave: But I am. / Dave: NOW would you agree that the mind is the most...

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