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| It's Actually Pretty Funny | Athena: HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA / Athena: HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA HA HA / Athena: HA HA HA HA / The joke's on me.
/ Fuckin' ALWAYS. http://actionathena.com/2008/09/15/jokes-on-me/ |
| Cheese is Delicious, Though | Seasons. / FALL.
/ Chick Outside Athena's Window: Hey!
/ Dude Outside Athena's Window: Hey! / WINTER.
/ Chick Outside Athena's Window: ha ha
/ Dude Outside Athena's Window: ha ha / SPRING.
/ Chick Outside Athena's Window: HEY! / SUMMER...
/ Athena: hey!
/ Chick: hey!
/ Dude: long time no see! / SUMMER...
/ Athena:... http://actionathena.com/2008/09/17/seasons/ |
| Get On Skype So I Can Flash You | Oh, the hand-writ letter!
/ And the noble quill dip pen!
/ Man: My angel, my all, my very self...
/ Woman: le swoon! / As good (but not quite better)
/ is the darling telegram! / Oh the old tyme telephone!
/ And sweet typewriter's notes!
/ Man: Doll, I'm writing you a love letter as we speak!
/ Woman: le... http://actionathena.com/2008/09/19/get-on-skype-so-i-can-flash-you/ |
| Small Press Expo | Sandra: I'm sorry, Kenneth, but...it's over! I don't love you anymore.
/ Kenneth: What! / Kenneth: But--but Sandra, we're engaged! Whatever shall I tell my parents? / Sandra: Tell them what you like--I'll be in Bermuda with the pool boy!
/ Kenneth: GASP! / Kenneth: WE DON'T EVEN HAVE A POOL! / [[Sandra... http://actionathena.com/2008/09/22/small-press-expo/ |
| Hooked | John: Sigh... / Mimi Pontoon: 2 minutes and 16 seconds. Better than last time. / Mimi Pontoon: Too bad you're paying me by the hour. http://actionathena.com/2008/09/24/hooked/ |
| Let's Do the Time Warp | The Member of Mod 71:
/ Sam
/ Daniel / Andrew
/ Simone
/ Alicia
/ Kristen / Kristian
/ Me http://actionathena.com/2008/09/29/lets-do-the-time-warp/ |
| Product Placement | Sam: Oh Ben? We found it last night. "Death at a Funeral"'s playing at--
/ Ben: Yeah. / Sam: Amherst Cinema. So we should go see it.
/ Ben: We should go see it. / Sam: We should take this guy, 'cause he needs to guide us through gay British comedy. / Daniel: TITTER! / [[Ben SLAMS the door as he... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/03/product-placement/ |
| Will You Hate Me Forever? | Bera: LOOK! / Bera: COMIC! MARVEL ZOMBIES! BRUCE CAMPBELL! / Bera: MARVEL ZOMBIES! BRUCE CAMPBELL! / Boy on Bed: ... / Boy on Bed: Well, I have to go to class now. / Bera: OKAY, BYE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! / [[Boy on Bed observes Bera run crazily down the path outside Boy on Bed's window.]]
/ Bera:... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/06/will-you-hate-me-forever/ |
| David and the Cauliflower | CAULIFLOWER / [[David tosses a bunch of cauliflower bits toward a garbage can. They fall to the ground.]] / David: grumble grumble / [[Again, David tosses a bunch of cauliflower bits toward a garbage can. Again, they fall to the ground.]] / David: Damnit! / Athena: What? / David: Oh, I had bits... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/08/david-and-the-cauliflower/ |
| Maine's All Right, But... | BEN IS IN MAINE / GRAVEROBBINSMITH: i want space money. / KRISTIANENERGIZE: for battles? / [[GRAVEROBBINSMITH pauses.]] / [[KRISTIANENERGIZE pauses.]] / KRISTIANENERGIZE: how is maine? / GRAVEROBBINSMITH: it's pretty. http://actionathena.com/2008/10/10/maines-all-right-but/ |
| Another Bacon-Related Fire Alarm | MOD 71 LEAVES THE LIVING ROOM / Ben: sex, sex
/ Daniel: ha ha, penis!
/ Sam: heh, sex / [[Bacon smokes in a pan. Fire alarm goes off BEEP BEEP!]]
/ Sam: oh shit! / [[The members of Mod 71 go outside.]] / [[Athena wanders through Enfield, a large book under her arm, looking up toward the sky.]] / [[Athena... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/13/another-bacon-related-fire-alarm/ |
| Pizza Night (was ages ago)! Vassar (was this weekend)! | Julia and Joe = in a serious relationship. / Chris and Suzanne = hooking up. / David and Kate = it's totally a thing. / Lindsay and Kristian = enjoying polyamory together. / Elizabeth = boyfriend of 2 years is away this weekend. / Tabitha = has a long-distance boyfriend. / Athena: Hey, I'm Athena.
/ Boy... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/20/pizza-night-was-ages-ago-vassar-was-this-weekend/ |
| I Obscenity in the Milk of Thy Mother | At the MOVIES with ATHENA
/ Athena: burp. / Athena: Oh wow, she picked the more attractive guy. / Athena: Huh, turns out his repeated assholery was all just a big misunderstanding. / Athena: Oh look, they just had sex, and her bra's still on. / Athena: Oh oh, here comes a problem. / Athena: Whew.... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/22/i-obscenity-in-the-milk-of-thy-mother/ |
| They're Such Nerds | Hipster Chick 1: OH MY GOD!!! Is that "Dirty Dancing?!" / Hipster Chick 2: Um, yeah, I love this movie.
/ Hipster Chick 1: Oh my god, me too! / Hipster Chick 2: Isn't Patrick Swayze SO CUTE?
/ Hipster Chick 1: Um, YES, even with the bad hair! / Both: ha ha We are SUCH NERDS! ha ha ha / [[They wander... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/24/theyre-such-nerds/ |
| Happy Anniversary | Baby Athena: I will never be old. / Child Athena: I will never be old. / Adolescent Athena: I will never be old. / College Athena: I will never be old. / Young Lady Athena: I will never be old. / Mother Athena [[to her new baby]]: YOU will never be old. http://actionathena.com/2008/10/27/happy-anniversary/ |
| Grocery Shopping with Athena and Chris | GROCERY SHOPPING WITH ATHENA AND CHRIS
/ Chris Semple: "Fruit Flavored Drink?" That's bad...they're not even calling it juice. / Athena: Oh man, this is even worse: "yogurty-covered fruit-flavored bits."
/ Chris Semple: Shame on you, Kellogg's. / Athena: So anyway, Alan Greenspan says-- / [[Old Man... http://actionathena.com/2008/10/29/grocery-shopping-with-athena-and-chris/ |
| Happy Halloween! | DRAGON
/ PRINCESS
/ WITCH
/ SEAHORSE
/ M&M
/ MAGICIAN
/ OLD LADY
/ GODDESS ATHENA
/ KILLER PROM QUEEN / COSTUMES OF HALLOWEENS PAST http://actionathena.com/2008/10/31/happy-halloween/ |
| Monday, Monday, Monday | ACTIONATHENA.COM
/ Rocking Guitar Solos?
/ Not So Much.
/ Comics?
/ Heck yes! 3 days a week!
/ (Dude, it's a website.)
/ (actionathena.com)
/ Don't bring the kids. http://actionathena.com/2008/11/03/monday-monday-monday/ |
| My President's Name is Barack Obama. | Lansing's True Value Hardware Store http://actionathena.com/2008/11/05/my-presidents-name-is-barack-obama/ |
| When I am Old I Shall be a Fucking Asshole | The (Old) Woman Question http://actionathena.com/2008/11/07/when-i-am-old-i-shall-be-a-fucking-asshole/ |
| Package o' Care | Athena: Want some cookies my mom sent?
/ Chris Semple: I love you! / Athena: I love you too. But only if you make me cookies.
/ Chris Semple: Aw, but why? You already HAVE cookies. / Athena: No, I'm just saying, my love is conditional on you giving me things.
/ Chris Semple: So that's why you love your... http://actionathena.com/2008/11/10/package-o-care/ |
| I Am Never Getting Naked in Front of a Boy Again | COMMENTS I HAVE HEARD AT MY HIPPIE COLLEGE FROM (FAIRLY) STRAIGHT, INFORMED MALES.
/ ATHENA "PUSSY HAS NO FACE" CURRIER / Ew! Vaginas are SO gross!
/ I just...REALLY don't like vaginas. / Look at that girl!
/ Who, her? Fattie.
/ No fat chicks. / I just don't think I could be attracted to anyone with... http://actionathena.com/2008/11/12/i-am-never-getting-naked-in-front-of-a-boy-again/ |
| He's Glad They Didn't Hook Up | Chris Semple: Y'know, I'm glad we didn't hook up. / Girl: What?
/ Chris Semple: Nothing. / Chris Semple: Y'know, I wish I had some caramel to go with this apple. / Girl: Who ARE you? http://actionathena.com/2008/11/14/hes-glad-they-didnt-hook-up/ |
| Obama Hives | On Saturday, November 1, I broke out in hives. / They were all over my right leg. There were several large patches of bumps and a general itching everywhere. / What was it?? Spider bites? Allergic reaction? It both itched and stung. Stung BAD wheN I was trying to go to sleep.
/ Athena: I'm gonna... http://actionathena.com/2008/11/17/obama-hives/ |
| Caffeinated Tea | CHRIS!
/ Chris Semple: Hey Athena-- / ATHENA.
/ Athena: Hey fatty, wanna learn how to talk without food in your mouth, fatty? / SEAN!
/ Sean: You're spicy today! / YAY!
/ Athena: I know! It's 'cause I was away all weekend, and then I had some caffeinated tea! http://actionathena.com/2008/11/19/caffeinated-tea/ |
| Apparently Masturbation is NOT a Cure-All | MASTURBATORY PROMPTS:
/ Alternatives to Skeezy Internet Porn. / COMICS
/ * Dykes to Watch Out For / MUSIC
/ * Carol of the Bells / TELEVISION
/ * Buffy the Vampire Slayer / FACEBOOK
/ * Anonymous Hottie / ALTERNATIVE PORN
/ * Pink & White's "The Crash Pad" / OR
/ You can make a challenge of it! What... http://actionathena.com/2008/11/21/apparently-masturbation-is-not-a-cure-all/ |
| Oh, Hollywood! | THE MATING DANCE / Hate / Debate / Bait / Date? / Hey Wait / Fornicate http://actionathena.com/2008/11/24/oh-hollywood/ |
| Gobble, Gobble. | Bera: Can I come in?
/ Athena: Yes. / Chris Semple: No! You can't! We're naked!
/ Bera: No, you're not. / Chris Semple: We're naked!
/ Bera: No, that's not happening. / Chris Semple: Naked...
/ Bera: Unless you have a cock made of corduroy... / [[Intense stare.]] http://actionathena.com/2008/11/26/gobble-gobble/ |
| Shameless. | ACTION ATHENA / A SOLID investment / Bringing quality webcomics to your local internet. / Free! 3 Days A Week! http://actionathena.com/2008/11/28/shameless/ |
| The Rattail | Boy: No, I am incapable of growing long hair. I once tried to grow a rat tail for a YEAR for a costume.
/ Girl: What was the costume?
/ Boy: Obi wan keno--
/ Hannah: I KNEW it! / THIS IS WHAT HE'S MISSING:
/ [[Drawing of Boy with a rat tail.]] http://actionathena.com/2008/12/01/the-rattail/ |
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