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Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 02/20/2008	[[Two silhouettes are reaching for a globe of planet earth]] / Narrator: Come, My Friends, And i will tell you a tale of joy and despair, Love and.. / 9: You make it sound like it's going to be all dramatic and shit. / Narrator: Isn't It? What good is a story without meaning and depth? / [[Woman in background giving birth screaming "Get this thing out of me"]] / 9: I'm just sayin... / Narrator: You're the one who wanted me to narrate your story. Now are you going to let me? / [[Doctor is dropping baby while woman sleeps "Whoops, damn these things are slippery"]] / 9: Fine, Fine... Go Ahead / Narrator: Good. Now as i was saying... It Is A Story Of Intrigue / 9: If By Intrigue you mean stupidity / [[Baby is in incubator]] / Narrator: A Grand struggle between the forces of good and evil, and the choices one boy must make as he walks the path to manhood / 9:I've got your manhood right HERE. / Narrator: Would you shut up and let me narrate this Dam... / 9: WAIT. What did we miss? / [[Close up of baby]] / Narrator: You, as a baby, being born / 9: Crap http://sediverse.com/?p=13
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 02/22/2008	[[9's mother leading 9 and his brother away from his father]] / Narrator: Shortly after his birth, 9's Parents decided to go separate ways / 9: I'm sure the wife-beating had nothing to do with it / 9: Or the compulsive gambling / 9: It was probably something like table settings / [[9 in room with toys and television, his brother and two people in the background]] / Narrator: 9 was often left in the hands of babysitters / Narrator: He played by himself, avoiding the harsh reality of his world / 9: Because my brother was, like, insane / Narrator: ..And he found solace in watching television / [[9 watching people arguing]] / Narrator: But that wasn't all he watched / 9: Yeah, daytime TV sucks http://sediverse.com/?p=14
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 02/25/2008	[[9's mother standing outside a self defense academy]] / Narrator: After being beaten by 9's father, 9's mother became obsessed with self-defense / [[9's mother training in academy]] / Narrator: She trained hard, and taught her children the ancient mystical art of KUY-RAH-TAY / [[9 is playing piano while his brother is bouncing around the room]] / Narrator: She also pushed both her children to excel in the arts and sciences / Narrator: It worked well for 9, but his brother, Skitzo, seemed uncontrollable. / [[9 watches as his brother gets punched away by a martial artist.]] / 9: In fact, we got banned from the martial arts academy because of it. / 9: Ever seen a 35 year old black belt kick the crap out of an 8 year old? / 9: Funny shit, man. Funny Shit. http://sediverse.com/?p=15
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 02/27/2008	[[A broken tape sits in a VCR next to a jar of peanut butter]] / Narrator: Young 9 found it doubly amusing as Skitzo had destroyed his puff the magic dragon tape a week earlier. / Narrator: While trying to make a toasted peanut butter sandwich. / [[A close up of 9's face]] / 9: You Heathen / [[9 and his mum talking to a doctor, Skitzo floats past in the background]] / Narrator: Skitzo's attention problems continued getting worse however, no matter how many times the life was beat out of him. / 9: I thought drugs were bad for you / Shady Doctor: Nah, this is the good shit. / [[Skitzo lying on the ground]] / Narrator: And so Skitzo was given copious amounts of drugs in an attempt to make him calm down. / 9: But this story aint about him, it's about me, damnit. http://sediverse.com/?p=16
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 02/29/2008	[[view of a city street]] / 9: Thank god we're done with that prologue shit, that stuff was BORING / Narrator: The rest of 9's life was equally boring. / 9: MORE??? / [[a group of kids is standing around while one shows of flaming hands]] / Narrator: At School he was no one special. Everyone had super powers and special abilities. / [[someone is flying]] / Narrator: Some more interesting than others. / [[9 getting covered by more and more bandages]] / 9: Yeah, and my superpower was to never die, like, no matter how injured I was, I would never die. / [[9 sitting on his bed alone]] / 9: No Fireballs / 9: No eye-lasers / 9: No BLOWING SHIT UP / 9: I just wasn't flashy enough to be amazing / 9: So, Yeah. I wasn't one of the cool kids. http://sediverse.com/?p=17

Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/05/2008	[[9 is poking a hobo with a stick while kids play in the background]] / 9: When i got to school, i usually hung out with myself. / 9: I stayed away from the playground, skirting the edges of the school, playing with whatever i found lying around. / [[9 is picking some flowers]] / 9: There were alot of flowers where i hid from the kids. So, I played with those sometimes. / 9: That probably didn't help my friend situation much. http://sediverse.com/?p=18
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/07/2008	[[Nelson, 9's friend, is walking in, he has two green dots on his forehead]] / 9: The only friend I had was a kid named nelson. / [[Nelson and 9 standing under a tree, 9 holding a flower]] / Nelson: Hey!!, Did you catch the new episode of powerman? / 9: yeah / Nelson: Cool... So, what are you up to? / 9: ...Just sitting here. / [[9 now has the flower behind his back]] / Nelson: It looked like you were playing with flowers, Sally Homemaker-style. / 9: WOAH!! NO WAY!! / 9: I just... Uh... HATE them so much I.. Uh... Want to... Uh... viciously tear them apart? Uh... Yeah. http://sediverse.com/?p=19
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/10/2008	[[9 walking home from school, to forth circle apartments]] / 9: After school, It was back to the same old crap. / 9: Nobody ever came over to our apartment because it was a crappy apartment in a crappy part of town. / 9: So I learned to amuse myself. / [[9's mum is sitting on the couch in their living room, 9 is dropping off his bag]] / 9's Mum: Hey Hun, How was school? / 9: Same old, same old. I'm going to go watch TV. / 9's Mum: No you're not. You'll kill brain cells. Why dont you go play outside? Go ride your bike or something. / [[close of 9's face]] / 9: one SMALL problem with that, mum. http://sediverse.com/?p=20
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/17/2008	[[Two people are throwing 9's belt over a fence]] / Narrator: Ahhh, here we go. 9, I got you a cup as well. Two Creams.. / 9: SHH!! / Narrator: Oh, ...Crap. / Narrator: What 9's Mother had forgotten was that earlier that week, some neighbourhood boys had thrown 9's precious KUH-RAH-TAY belt over a wall... / [[9 is riding bike home with belt in hand]] / Narrator: ...And as he was returning, belt in hand. / 9: Stupid Kids. You're fine now, Sasha. They won't hurt you anymore. / <> / [[A car is speeding along]] / Narrator: But out of nowhere. / [[9 is flying of his bike, which has been destroyed]] / <> http://sediverse.com/?p=21
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/19/2008	[[9 is on pavement with blood running down his face, a black man is getting out the car]] / 9: Blakman. The Most Notorious supervillian in the world. ..Or at least in my apartment complex. / 9: Some people can dodge bullets. Well blakman could dodge felony traffic violations. / 9: He was citation proof. / Blakman: HOLY SHIT. Kid! you okay?!? You's Not gonna sue poor blakman, is you?! / 9: No I'm Fine.. I.. / 9: MY BIKE!! / [[9 is watching his bike burn, blakman is getting back into the car]] / Blakman: Imma buy you a new one, Kid!! Wit gold wheels an shit!! / 9: Just as soon as you get back from driving away really fast, right? / Blakman: You bet, Kid. http://sediverse.com/?p=22

Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/03/2008	[[SED Presents: When our generation rules the world, president speaking]] / President: Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that malboridian wall that darken my soul like a flock of ebony ravens descending on a succulent feast of rot. / [[president still speaking]] / President: Or Don't, I dont care. / [[ultimate lols]] / <> http://sediverse.com/?p=84
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/12/2008	[[SED special: Employment failures, why emplyment agencies suck]] / [[people in a meeting to discuss a bill]] / Man: Y0, iZ H4V 4 B111 U H452 P455 FTW!!1! / [[close up of the bill, it is some seriously intense leet speek]] / [[meeting adudicator close up with others in background]] / Man1: QUE? / Man2: B17ch, N0oB, Fuk3d Ur M0m! / Adjudicator: Can Anybody read this shit??? http://sediverse.com/?p=85
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/14/2008	[[SED special: Employment failures: Why employment agencies suck]] / [[classroom with some school kids in it, a latina person with a gun is at the front]] / Person: Set yo stupid asses down RIGHT MOTHERFUCKIN NOW. / [[Person is standing over terrified kid]] / Person: Der aint gon be no NAPPY TIME BITCH! Yo tryin to say sumtin bout my hair? / Person: Yo hatin on me, Cracker ass racist motherfucka? / Person: Yo wan beef wif me, mothafucka? Yo wan beef wif me? / [[Person has gun held to head of terrified kid]] / Kid: I want my mommy! http://sediverse.com/?p=86
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/21/2008	[[9 is back in his room]] / Narrator: Blakman never did buy 9 a new bike with shiny gold wheels. / 9: Fucker. / Narrator: So instead, 9 had to find something else to do. / Narrator: Poor 9's room was barren and he had few toys to play with. / [[9 is thinking]] / Narrator: And so, he thought, long and hard, about how to defeat this monster... / Narrator: This 'Boredom'. / [[9 has an idea]] / 9: And in the end, I decided to go where I always did. http://sediverse.com/?p=87
Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 03/24/2008	[[There is a picture of a nice playground, with a large red cross in the bottom corner, indicating this is the wrong choice]] / [[9 is all dirty, playing in a garbage bin, there is a green tick indicating this is the right choice]] / 9: I Was an odd kid. http://sediverse.com/?p=88

SED ? Archive ? Raging Demon	[[Demonic 9 is sitting on a rock in the forest]] http://sediverse.com/?p=370
SED ? Archive ? All Of You	[[9, Chuckles, Robin, Pip and Fort are standing in a forest]] / Narrator: They met in the forest the next day / Narrator: ...And 9 told his team of his plan / [[profile shot of 9, explaining]] / 9:We're going to do this. for real. and that means no freebies. / 9: You're going to have to prove you can handle it. / [[The rest of the group are standing there, looking tired]] / 9: All of you http://sediverse.com/?p=391
SED ? Archive ? Foo	[[9 is holding a diagram, the rest of the page is taken up by Pip and Fort]] / 9: Pip, Fort, You're up first. / Pip: Bring it on, Foo. http://sediverse.com/?p=394
SED ? Archive ? The Gizmo	[[Pip and Fort are looking at something 9 is holding in his hand]] / 9: Alrighty then... Lets see... / 8: I have here a little toy I made a few hours ago. / 9: It's fast, it flies, and it'll give ya a nasty shock if you move too slow. / [[9 holding winged ball thing with huge grin on his face, Chuckles in background checking bag]] / 9: Still Game? / Chuckles: Anybody seen my gameboy? http://sediverse.com/?p=395
SED ? Archive ? Wakey Wakey	[[9 is chuckin small winged ball in the air]] / 9: But, before i let this little baby loose on everybody, all of you need to know HOW it works! / 9: That way, nobody, you know, DIES! / 9: Sooooo, ROBIN! / 9: ...Care to show them how it works? / [[9 looking at Robin, who is asleep on the ground]] / 9: ... / 9: ...Robin? / 9: Uh... Wakey Wakey? http://sediverse.com/?p=396

SED ? Archive ? Waking Death	[[9 is poking Robin]] / 9:Hey... Robin... / [[Robin is looming over the group, looking menacing]] / 9: I think we'll let her sleep / Chuckles: I concur http://sediverse.com/?p=397
SED ? Archive ? Batter Up	[[9 about to hit the ball thingy]] / 9: Ok then... Guess I'll have the honour http://sediverse.com/?p=398
SED ? Archive ? Crack	[[toothball appears]] / 9: And on the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain! Either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow. Lets do this. http://sediverse.com/?p=399
SED ? Archive ? Hee Hee Haw Haw	<> / [[large toothed baseball monster thingy is laughing]] / [[9 looking serious]] / 9: Aim for the teeth, keep low, keep moving... / 9: Or just take the hit... / 9: or... / 9: Not? / [[Crazy catgirl is attacking weird toothball]] / Catgirl: Noooooooo!!! I wun let you hert my 9!! / <> http://sediverse.com/?p=400
SED ? Archive ? MnDB Common Cents	Title:Molly and the dough boy, common cents? what's that / Molly: Hey doughboy, I've been fighting with my boyfriend... / Molly: At first we argued a lot, and after a while, I realized he was right, but I don't want to tell him that. / Molly: So now we just keep fighting / Doughboy: Whatever you do, don't back down!! / Doughboy: I mean, you could just stop the fight by admitting you were wrong. / Doughboy: Then listening to each other and trying to work towards a solution peacefully... / Doughboy: But then you wouldn't win. ...And winning feels soooo good. / Molly: Plus you can't let those men start thinking they can win, right? / Doughboy: Right! So fight on, my friend!! http://sediverse.com/?p=401#comments

Serious Emotional Disturbances ť Archive ť 04/06/2009	[[Two Halo characters are on scene. One appears to be dead while the other does some kind of tea-bagging to the fallen one]] / Narrator: This Is a SED public service announcement / please do not attempt to adjust your computer screen / Displaying superiority over a weaker foe? / Nope. Sorry / [[Same picture is shown. This time there's a rainbow in the backgroung and a skeleton doing a peace-sign on the lower-right corner of the second panel]] / Narrator:Homosexual necrophilia? / Skeleton: uh... / rock on? / Narrator: YE-UP / {{04/06/2009}} http://sediverse.com/?p=337#comment-1621

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