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| #241 - Taxing | Dr. Eldritch: See here: "Trolls earning less than $14,500 are exempt from filing." How much did you make last year?
/ Trevor: Four dollars and thirty-seven cents.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Ah. I should have asked that an hour ago.
/ Ping: What are you guys doing? / Dr. Eldritch: Determining that Trevor doesn't owe any income tax.
/ Ping: Oh no! It's Tax Day! I haven't filed!
/ Dr. Eldritch: How much did YOU make last year?
/ Ping: $215,483.92. From my novel. / Dr. Eldritch: Well, this says you're exempt if you're a cryptid, robot or... PANDA?
/ Ping: Excellent! Our lobbying bloc worked! / Dr. Eldritch: You've got to be kidding.
/ Ping: Everybody loves pandas! / {{Seriously, who's going to vote against Pandas?}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic241.html |
| #242 - NLW 2007 | {{comic title= NLW 2007 }}
/ {{comic number= #242 }} / [[Library Reference Desk]]
/ Librarian: Reference Desk!
/ Trevor: Happy Library Week!
/ Librarian: Er... Thank you! What's todays question? / [[Trevor's basement]]
/ Trevor: I don't have one. You've always been so nice and helpful, I'd thought I'd just call and say thanks!
/ Librarian: Really?
/ Trevor: Yup! Have a great week!
/ TV: Disturbingly, 95% of all people are now below-average intelligence! / [[Library Reference Desk]]
/ Silent Penultimate Panel / [[Library Reference Desk, but now with a smiling librarian!]] / {{Have you thanked a Librarian lately?}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Ping}} {{Trevor}} {{Librarian}} {{Reference Desk}} {{TV}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic242.html |
| #243 - Games | {{comic title= Games }}
/ {{comic number= #243 }} / [[In the basement, Trevor, Ping and Byron play cards]]
/ [[Trevor looks at Ping]] / [[Trevor looks at Byron]] / [[Trevor looks at Ping, again]] / Trevor: No, I can't tell which of you has the prettier eyes.
/ Ping and Byron: DRINK! / {{Hey, it's the rule.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Ping}} {{Byron}} {{Trevor}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic243.html |
| #244 - Clever Ploy | {{comic title= Clever Ploy }}
/ {{comic number= #242 }} / [[In the Entrance Hall]]
/ Trevor: I've been thinking about Val doing it with Ping.
/ Kari Proctor: Yeah, about that...
/ Trevor: You know what would really mess with them? / Trevor: If WE had sex! Too funny, right? We'd all laugh and...
/ Kari: Stop. Aren't you just trying to trick me into sleeping with you by pretending that we'd be doing it to play a joke on them? / Trevor: Maybe. / Trevor: Is it working?
/ Kari: You'll be the first to know.
/ Trevor: Cool!
/ {{You have to admire Trevors' optimism.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Kari}} {{Trevor}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic244.html |
| #245 - No, Trevor | {{comic title= No, Trevor }}
/ {{comic number= #245 }} / [[In the living room, Valeria Steele is lounging on the sofa]]
/ Kari Proctor [can be heard, although she is still in the hall]: NO! BAD TROLL! {i}SIT{/i}! / [[in the hall, Val has just arrived there]
/ Val [to Kari]: You okay?
/ Kari: Yes. Trevor was just telling me... something he thought he and I should do together. / Val: Um.. Sit?
/ Kari: Force of habit.
/ Trevor [sitting on the ground next to the door]: I better get a cookie for this. / {{Most Trolls do not sit on command.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Val}} {{Kari}} {{Trevor}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic245.html |
| #246 - Tulips | {{comic title= Tulips }}
/ {{comic number= #246 }} / [[In the park]]
/ Valeria Steele: So, THAT'S what Trevor wanted to do?
/ Kari Proctor: Yeah.
/ Val: I did that with a boyfriend once. It´s not so bad.
/ Kari: True. But you know what happens if you let a guy know you´ve done it before. / Val: Sure. He begs and begs and begs for it until you can't stand it and finally give in....
/ Kari: And afterwards, he wants you to say that with HIM you enjoyed it.
/ Val: Exactly! / {{So I've heard anyway...}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Val}} {{Kari}} {{Pink Tulips}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic246.html |
| #247 - What's Goo With You? | {{comic title= What's goo with you? }}
/ {{comic number= #247 }} / [[Two gnomes are talking, something pink is forming on the ceiling]]
/ Oliver: Turns out, her twin sister is TOTALLY into it!
/ Gerard: Nice!
/ [[Nigel, a third gnome, enters the room]]
/ Nigel: Hey, guys!
/ Oliver: Crap on a biscuit! It's Nigel! I'm sick of him whining about his divorce.
/ Gerard: Didn't Charlene catch him cheating in her?
/ Oliver: Yeah. With a Turquisie.
/ Gerard: EWWW! / Nigel: Have I got news!
/ Oliver: Hi, Nigel! We were just leaving...
/ Gnome Nigel: Did you hear about the letter I got from Charlene's lawyer?
/ Oliver: Wow, is that the time? Maybe later....
/ Nigel: Apparently the Mega-Bitch isn't satisfied with HALF of the condo... / [[That pink stuff drops from the ceiling and drops on Nigel, immediatly starting to dissolve him]]
/ <<*PLOP!*>>
/ Gerard: WHOA!
/ Nigel: AAUGH! AAUUGHH!! IT BURNS!!
/ Oliver:What the Frak!?!
/ Gerard: Don´t worry, Nigel! We'll... go for help! / [[The other two gnomes run away]]
/ Gerard: Damn, that was lucky!
/ Oliver: Tell me about it! /
/ {{Based on a true story.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Gerard}} {{Gnome Nigel}} {{Oliver}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic247.html |
| #248 - We Hardly Goo Ye | {{comic title= We Hardly Goo Ye }}
/ {{comic number= #248 }} / [[In the hallway, Dr. Eldritch and some Gnomes are talking about the goo forming on the ceiling; Nigel's hat is lying on the floor with some remnants of the goo which dripped from the ceiling]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: Yeah, that can't be good. Thanks for telling me.
/ Oliver: Sure thing!
/ Gerard: We figure it must be female. / Dr. Eldritch: Why's that?
/ Oliver: Nigel never did have any luck with women!
/ Oliver and Gerard: HAHHAHAHAHAHA! / Dr. Eldritch: Hey, have some respect! He's right there!
/ Oliver and Gerard: Sorry! / Dr. Eldritch: At least I think so. I hardly recognize him when he's not complaining about Charlene.
/ Gerard: Hahahahaha!
/ Oliver: Yeah! / {{Well, we know who's going to get the condo.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Gerard}} {{Oliver}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Pink Goo}} {{Charlene}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic248.html |
| #249 - Goo Attitude | {{comic title= Goo Attitude }}
/ {{comic number= #249 }} / [[In the floor, the Gnomes and Dr. Eldritch are standing beside a bucket which is placed on the floor under the spot of goo dripping from the ceiling, Val and Kari are passing by]]
/ Dr. Eldritch [[to the Gnomes]: ...but by THEN, we were already coated with oil...
/ Oliver: Bigs!
/ Gerard: RUN!!
/ Kari Proctor: EEEK!
/ Valeria Steele [[to Dr. Eldritch]]: Who are you talking to?
/ [[the Gnomes are running away, FAST]] / Val: A bucket of hair gel?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Careful, don't let it get on you!
/ Kari: You saw them, didn't you? / Dr. Eldritch: No, it's a corrosive viscous mystery solution. We're calling it Charlene.
/ <<*PLOP!*>>
/ Kari: I hope, they weren't Pika. / Val: CHARLENE?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Long story.
/ Kari: I had an uncle who was eaten by Pika. / {{This is for everyone who has ever contemplated making a comic where all you see is the characters' feet.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Gerard}} {{Oliver}} {{Kari}} {{Val}} {{Charlene, the Goo}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic249.html |
| #250 - Getting Comfortable | {{comic title= Getting Comfortable }}
/ {{comic number= #250 }} / [[Living room, Val and Kari are lying on the couch, Val has her arm around Kari]]
/ Valeria Steele: See? isn't this more comfortable?
/ Kari Proctor: What if someone walks in on us?
/ Val: What? We're just watching a movie. / [[Ping walks in on them]]
/ Ping: Oh yeah! I've gotta get me some of that! / [[Silent Penultimate Panel; The women look at Ping]] / [[Ping has moved to the feet of the sofa and sits on the ground]]
/ Ping: I'll just sit over here.
/ Val: See? No problem.
/ Kari: Yeah, that wasn't awkward or anything. / {{Apparently, Ping was still in the Hanging Out With The Guys mode.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Ping}} {{Kari}} {{Val}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic250.html |
| #251 - Art Imitates Art | {{comic title= Art Imitates Art }}
/ {{comic number= #251 }} / [[In the living room, Kari and Val are lying on the sofa, Kari in Vals arm]]
/ Kari Proctor: The movie was so sweet! I wish real life was like that.
/ Valeria Steele: What, couples almost breaking up because of stupid misunderstandings? Or the thing with the melon?
/ Kari: No! Not assuming that the other person can't be THEIR person!
/ Val: Huh? / Kari: Romcoms start with the couple not seeing that they could be perfect for each other. In the movies, they figure it out, but in real life they don't. People shouldn't let those assumptions keep them from taking a chance!
/ Val [[with shining eyes]]: Yeah?
/ Kari: Yeah! / [[Val leans over Kari to kiss her]] / [[Kari embraces Val in the kiss]]
/ [[caption: to be continued...]] / {{Romcom: Romantic Comedy, but you knew that, right?}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Kari}} {{Val}} {{lesbian kiss}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic251.html |
| #252 - Or Not | {{comic title= Or Not }}
/ {{comic number= #252 }} / [[In the living room, Kari and Val have just disconected from their kiss]]
/ Valeria Steele: How was that?
/ Kari Proctor: It was... nice.
/ Val: Just NICE? I could try for "naughty."
/ Kari: No, I should go to bed. / [[Kari is sitting up]]
/ Val: Don't you mean WE?
/ Kari: Sorry, I'm not ready.
/ Val: Give me five minutes and you will be! / Kari: You know what I mean.
/ Val: But you were saying...
/ Kari: I know. It's just... more complicated than in a movie.
/ [[Kari leaves]] / [[Val stands up and looks at Ping, who is still next to the sofa]]
/ Val: Robot! My room! Now!
/ Ping: Okay! / {{Well, Ping's glad he stayed through to the end of the movie.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Ping}} {{Val}} {{Kari}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic252.html |
| #253 - The Goo Thickens | {{comic title= The Goo Thickens }}
/ {{comic number= #253 }} / [[In the hallway, Trevor and Dr. Eldritch are walking]]
/ Trevor: Wouldn't Charlene be at Nigel's condo?
/ Dr. Eldritch: We're not looking for THAT Charlene.
/ Trevor: Oh, good! She scares me. / [[They stop at a vase, which has turned pink, covered in goo]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: The pink Charlene seems to be seeping through the floor above, so all we need to do is find the source, which seems to be right... UH OH.
/ Tervor: What? / [[Both are looking at the ceiling]]
/ Trevor: Oh. Upstairs? / [[They are looking into the Pool Room upstairs, where everything is covered in goo]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: Now, THIS is a problem. We'll have to... Are you drooling?
/ Trevor: Looks like JAM! / {{I suspect, Trevor would eat a pool table if it was covered in gravy.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Trevor}} {{Charlene, Goo}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic253.html |
| #254 - Good Question | {{comic title= Good Question }}
/ {{comic number= #254 }} / [[Kari knocks at Vals door]]
/ < http://askdreldritch.com/comic254.html |
| #255 - Sharing | Val: So I'm supposed to be celibate until you make up your mind, like maybe someday?
/ Kari: You're a woman, I shouldn't have to explain that even though I can't ASK you to do that, I want you to WANT to do that for me without me saying I want you to.
/ Val: HUH? / Kari: Plus, it felt like you two were sneaking around behind my back.
/ Val: Damn, girl! You're acting like I slept with your boyfriend.
/ Kari: URK! No, we're not...
/ Val: Whoa, you're blushing? Like you... No!! You DID IT WITH PING!?! / Kari: SHHHH! You don't have to yell!
/ Val: What? You're not ashamed, are you?
/ Kari: No! But it's personal! / Val: He's just a MACHINE!
/ Kari: No, he's SOMEBODY!
/ Ping: [[hugging Kari's calf]] That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me!
/ Dr. Eldritch: You know what would be FUN? If you had this conversation SOMEWHERE ELSE! / {{I know; Val comes across as a bit of a Cyberist.}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic255.html |
| #256 - Testing | Kari: I have to go to work. You two can... whatever.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Mustard... No. / Val: What are you doing?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Experimenting. There's always some substance that nullifies a dangerous blob like this, so I'm trying everything I can think of. This is mostly recreational, though. The answer's always found right before it's too late, so all I'm doing now is reducing the number of substances I have to try at the last minute. / Val: What if you PRETEND we're out of time?
/ Dr. Eldritch: That's worth a shot.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Oh, no! If this doesn't work, we'll be destroyed FOR SURE! / Dr. Eldritch: Oh, well. Dish soap... no.
/ Val: Wait, you call that ACTING?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Hey, I got rave reviews for my performance in our high-school production of "Oh! Calcutta!"
/ Val: And why would I believe THAT?
/ Dr. Eldritch: "OHHHHH, CALCUTTA, WHERE THE WIND COMES SWEEPING DOWN THE PLAIN!" / {{Which makes me think of a way to make the musical 'Oklahoma!' a LOT more interesting.}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic256.html |
| #257 - The Straw | [[Kari at her wardrobe, discovering its been overrun by Charlene.]]
/ Kari: AAAUGH! I can't take it anymore! / [[Kari standing thoughtfully, and somewhat petulantly...]] / [[Kari striding down the upstairs hall...]] / [[Kari in the kitchen, where Ping, Val, and Dr. Eldritch look up from their current anti-Charlene-experimentation...]]
/ Kari: AAAUGH! I can't take it anymore!
/ Dr. Eldritch: Hot dog? / {{Like Shakespeare said: Histrionics are a Dish best served to an Appreciative Audience.}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic257.html |
| #258 - Going-Away Present | [[Kari with dufflebag over her shoulder, heading for the door.]]
/ Trevor: Taking a trip?
/ Kari: No, I'm moving out.
/ Trevor: What!? You can't!
/ Kari: I'm pretty sure I can. / Trevor: Bet we haven't... I mean, I never... If you leave, we won't... / Kari: Are you trying to find an argument that isn't based on us not having had sex yet?
/ Trevor: Yeah. / Kari: I'll miss you, too.
/ Trevor: Then how about a quickie?
/ Kari: But not that much. / {{It's the thought that counts. Supposedly.}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic258.html |
| #259 - Choice | Kari: Are you here to talk me out of going?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Do you want me to?
/ Kari: Kinda.
/ Dr. Eldritch: I probably could, but you need to own this decision completely. / Kari: You're doing that "making me function as a grown-up" thing again.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Yeah. Force of habit.
/ Kari: I should tell you the REAL reason I'm leaving. / Dr. Eldritch: Yes?
/ Kari: I want you. Desperately. Frantically. I can barely stand not taking you RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW! / Dr. Eldritch: Buh... WHAT?? REALLY!?!
/ Kari: No. But the look on your face was totally worth it. / {{When people say you should do something unpleasant because it 'Builds Character,' they never explain why you need more Character.}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic259.html |
| #260 - More Character | {{comic title= More Character }}
/ {{comic number= #260 }} / Kari Proctor: Tell Val goodbye for me.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Wouldn't it be better if YOU did that?
/ Kari: No. You saw. Things are ... complicated. It would be awkward. / Dr. Eldritch: Uh huh. How did you feel when she went away, and just left a note?
/ Kari: I was really... oh.
/ Kari: DOOTS! / Kari: Couldn't I just text her? Or send an email?
/ Dr. Eldritch: The way you ask that question tells me you already know the answer. / Kari: Darn it. You're right. It's got to be at LEAST a Singing Telegram.
/ Dr. Eldritch: I'm so glad we had this talk. / {{ The singing telegram company I use does a really rendition of "Sorry I Accidentally Slept With Your Sister". It's surprisingly popular. }} / {{Appearances:}} {{Kari}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic260.html |
| #261 - It's Not Goodbye | {{comic title= It's Not Goodbye }}
/ {{comic number= #261 }} / Kari Proctor: Look, I just need some space, so I can figure out what I want.
/ Valeria Steele: Sure. Fine.
/ Kari: Don't say that if you don't mean it!
/ Val: Why? Does it make any difference? / Kari: It does. I know this looks like rejection and me avoiding everything by running away. Maybe it is. But I really am trying to do what's right. I'll understand if you can't, or won't, wait. If we hooked up now, it would be a fling for you and an experiment for me.
/ Kari: While that's not a bad thing, it seems important that if we go beyond platonic, I shouldn't be doing it mostly because someone else wants me to. / Val: <<*SIGH*>>
/ Val: I'm still really pissed at you.
/ Kari: Okay.
/ Val: Damn, Girl! I'm trying to pick a fight here! / Kari: Sorry! Um... I'M LEAVING AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!
/ Val: I can tell you're faking it! / {{I'm confident that no women I've ever fought with was faking it.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Kari}} {{Val}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic261.html |
| #262 - Sans Pudding | Val: Okay, troll, you and me. Right now!
/ Trevor (vacuuming gnomes): We're going to have sex? / Val: No, the thing you want SECOND MOST to do with me.
/ Trevor: Have sex?
/ Val: Wait.... If that's #2, what's #1?
/ Trevor: Have sex!
/ Val: That's one AND two?
/ Trevor: It's my top 14. / Val: Fine. What's #15?
/ Trevor: *GASP!* Pudding wrestling! / Val: Sure. Without the pudding. Bring it, Troll!
/ Trevor: You are SO ON, cat girl! / {{Which of your friends would be willing to wrestle you in a wading pool filled with pudding?}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic262.html |
| #263 - Après Wrestling | {{comic title= Après Wrestling }}
/ {{comic number= #263 }} / [[In the basement, Trevor and Val are wrestling]]
/ Valeria Steele: YEOWWWW!
/ Trevor: No Biting! {I}NO BITING!{/I} / Caption: Later:
/ Trevor: Oh, man! That was GREAT!
/ Val: Yeah!
/ Trevor: This isn't going to change anything, is it? I don't want things to get weird.
/ Val: What are you talking about? / Trevor: I won.
/ Val: The hell you did! You never pinned me!
/ Trevor: You didn't pin me.
/ Val: So we TIED.
/ Trevor: No, I won on POINTS. / Val: Okay, again! Right now!
/ Trevor: i need twenty minutes and a gallon of ice cream.
/ Val: Men! / {{I hate it when things get weird.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Val}} {{Trevor}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic263.html |
| #264 - Gary And Walter, Part 1 | {{comic title= Gary And Walter, Part 1 }}
/ {{comic number= #264 }} / [[in the living room, nobody there but the furniture]]
/ Clock: She SAYS she's not prejudiced against joinery, but has she ever dated anyone who wasn't upholstered?
/ Walter, the Drawer-Desk: Ha! Ain't that the truth!
/ Kevin, the Plant: But didn't she go out with a china hutch last year? / Clock: Oh my god! A talking plant! / {{silent penultimate panel}} / Walter: Dude, that's like the fifth time you've done that joke.
/ Kevin: It's fine Walter. I can tell when I'm not wanted.
/ Walter: And you've hurt Kevin's feelings!
/ Clock: Hey, I've just gotta go with what's funny! / {{Risibility is generally inversely proportional to repetition.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Kevin, the Plant}} {{Walter, the Drawer Desk}} {{Gary, the Clock}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic264.html |
| #265 - Robo-Therapy | {{comic title= Robo-Therapy }}
/ {{comic number= #265 }} / Ping: Can we talk?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Sure. Walk with me while I look for more outbreaks of Charlene.
/ Ping: Okay. I feel bad about what's happened.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Tell me more about feeling bad. / Ping: ..so when I hooked up with Kari and Val, it was just for fun. No strings. I'm fine with that. Sure, maybe someday I'll want to settle down and start a family, but not now.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Uh huh. / Ping: I didn't think Kari would feel threatened by me. I mean, I only wanted to make them both happy! But I think I made things worse.
/ Dr. Eldritch: I understand.
/ Elevator: <<*Ping*>> / [[The elevator door opens and Charlene swaps out.]]
/ <<*BLUB!*>>
/ Ping: And my problems are being eclipsed by pink goo!
/ Dr. Eldritch: Life is like that. / {{It's not an Easter Egg per se, but feel free to point out the movie reference}}
/ {{Appearances:}} {{Ping}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Charlene, the pink goo}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic265.html |
| #266 - Desperate Measures | {{comic title= Desperate Measures }}
/ {{comic number= #266 }} / [[In the kitchen, Val hears a high and squeaky voice reciting Coleridge]]
/ Dr. Eldritch:
/ The very deep did rot: O Christ!
/ That ever this should be!
/ Yea, slimy things did crawl with legs
/ Upon the slimy sea! / [[In the living room, Dr. Eldritch sits on the sofa and reads from a book to a bucket for of Charlene, the pink goo. Val has just come in to see what he's doing.]]
/ Valeria Steele: What the hell are you DOING?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Still trying to neutralize Charlene.
/ Val: Got that. But what's with the screeching?
/ Oh. I'm reading Coleridge in a high, squeaky voice. / Val: It's horrible!
/ Dr. Eldritch: I know! Unfortunately it only stuns the goo, but doesn't kill it completly.
/ Val: Please tell me you're stopping now. / Dr. Eldritch: I still have to try Melville with a Scottish brogue and a leet-speak version of "Grendel."
/ Val: I'll be out drinking.
/ Dr. Eldritch: That's a common reaction. / {{Listen! You can hear the Coleridge Scholars chortling!}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Val}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Charlene, the pink goo}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic266.html |
| #267 - Desperate Times | {{comic title= Desperate Times }}
/ {{comic number= #267 }} / [[In the kitchen, Dr. Eldritch is experimenting how he can defeat Charlene, Val is watching]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: The answer was so obvious, I almost overlooked it. You know those genetically-engineered microbes that eat oil spills? All we need are some to eat Charlene! / Valeria Steele: That's drain cleaner.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Well, yes. But it's based on microorganisms that produce clog-dissolving enzymes. Watch!
/ [[Dr. Eldritch opens the bottle of drain cleaner he is holding,...]] / [[...and pours some of the drain cleaner into the bucket containing a part of Charlene...]]
/ <<*shook* *shook*>>
/ <<*GLUB*>> / <<*FLOOP!*>>
/ [[... who immediatly expands to spill over the bucket onto the kitchen working space.]]
/ Val: Oh, yeah. That's SO much better.
/ Dr. Eldritch: Crap, I forgot to say "IF THIS DOESN'T WORK, WE'RE ALL DOOMED!"
/ Val: Looks like you're right, though. / {{Hey, this isn''t an Exact Science.}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Val}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Charlene, the pink goo}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic267.html |
| #268 - Desperate Measures | {{comic title= Desperate Measures }}
/ {{comic number= #268 }} / [[The residents stand in front of the mansion]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: At this rate, we only have a few hours before the mansion fills up with Charlene. The structure will either dissolve or collapse under the weight.
/ Valeria Steele: Sucks either way. / [[the big window shows Charlene filling the mansion, from top to down]]
/ Dr. Eldritch: Indeed. What's worse, the whole world could eventually be covered by pink goo. The lives of all humans and celebrities are at... Are you drooling again?
/ Trevor: Can't... help... it. / Dr. Eldritch: Wait, that gives me an idea! A crazy idea! One so crazy, it...
/ Val: Less talk!
/ Dr. Eldritch: Right. Trevor, you're with me. Val, get the hand spreader from the gardening shed, and meet us back here. / Val: Is this going to work?
/ Dr. Eldritch: I think the situation is sufficiently desperate.
/ Val: Cool.
/ {{Someone think of the Child Celebrities!}} / {{Appearances:}} {{Charlene, the pink goo}} {{Trevor}} {{Val}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic268.html |
| #269 - When Life Gives You Pink Goo... | {{comic title= When Life Gives You Pink Goo... }}
/ {{comic number= #269 }} / Dr. Eldritch: I tried these two substances separately, but neither was sufficient on its own. if they're MIXED TOGETHER, however...
/ Valeria Steele: Is it supposed to get all lumpy like that?
/ Dr. Eldritch: Let's see if I'm right. / Dr. Eldritch: Perfect! The pectin and acidity combined reacts with the sugar to neutralize her enzymes. We just need to coat all of Charlene with this mixture.
/ Val: That's going to make... / Dr. Eldritch: Yes: several thousand gallons of pink jam.
/ Dr. Eldritch [[to Trevor]]: Dude, are you crying?
/ Trevor: So... HAPPY! / {{You're supposed to make Lemonade when Life Gives You Lemons, but where do you get the SUGAR?]] / {{Appearances:}} {{Dr. Eldritch}} {{Byron}} {{Val}} http://askdreldritch.com/comic269.html |
| #270 - Mission Accomplished | {{comic title= Mission Accomplished }}
/ {{comic number= #270 }} / Dr. Eldritch: Another crises averted! Who wants ice cream?
/ Trevor: Not me! I have a job to do.
/ Dr. Eldritch: The world is in your debt. Now, go eat jelly! / [[Val and Dr. Eldritch walk away, while Trevor starts his crusade]]
/ Valeria Steele: I just gotta say, that's totally disgusting.
/ Dr. Eldritch: One of the key skills for saving the world is not thinking about it afterwards.
/ <<*SLUUURRRP!*>>
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