You're browsing the archives of Hyper Death Babies.
You can search these comics too.

show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]

Anomaly - Hard at Work Mister Willington: Hank! Get the FUCK in here! / Hank Cox: I've been standing here for ten minutes, sir. / Mister Willington: What the FUCK is this?! / Hank Cox: It appears to be a drawing of a pig. / Mister Willington: Mind explaining to me how a drawing of a pig got on my desk? / Hank Cox: You drew one, sir. With crayon. While I was standing here.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=121
The Charles Era - Harvest Season i am a farmer. it's all i can do because my feet are made of rocket ships. / just kidding. / they're actually made of jet packs.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=121
Anomaly - Tripping Balls Sam! Shit! Sam! I'm tripping balls! / Take it easy, man. First off, I'm going to need you to tell me how many fingers you see me holding up. / Four! No, wait! Twelve! / You're way off. It was fourteen. But I think you'll be just fine. / You mean it? / {{Goat head}} / Yes.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=122
The Charles Era - Power Person Team TROUBLE!! POWER PERSON TEAM ASSEMBLE! / yeah, Super Thing, you'd better get to the Power Mobile. / good idea, Can't-Fight-Very-Well Man! / see, Jim? we don't really have a Power Mobile. i just tell him that so i can laugh at his underwear while he's gone. / later... / hahahahaha!! / why do you people always laugh at me?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=122
Anomaly - Robot Do's and Don'ts [[Robots don't say...]] / Can you pass the salt, please? / [[Robots do say...]] / Terrax 5000: TERRAX 5000 SHALL DESTROY YOUR PUNY SALT!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=123
The Charles Era - Friendship man, i do love sailing the Great Elven Seas! / don't you, Perkins The Unicorn? / i sure do, Sir Graham! almost as much as i love snuggling with fairies. / but remember, we are on a mission from the queen. / right. we must get to the Muddy Foothills past the Field of Corn! / onward! / mom! there's tiny people playing in my poo again! / WE MADE IT! ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE WITH FRIENDSHIP!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=123
Anomaly - It Could Be Ketchup Thomas the Mailman: Why hello there, everybody! Thomas, here. Just illegally reading your mail on live television as usual. / Thomas the Mailman: Today's letter is from someone named "Back Road Killer". / samantha everette, / if you ever want to see your daughter again, leave twenty thousand by the swings in the playground. / - back road killer / Thomas the Mailman: Well, Mr. Killer, if you ever want your letters to get to the proper destination, USE PROPER POSTAGE! / Thomas the Mailman: Hahaha! / [[Next week: Police investigations!]]
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=124
The Charles Era - Anomaly i hate being a nipple! / ... except carrots can't breathe. / colonels... two colonels ride bikes in the sunset. / oh my! / my beloved hands can fish all on their own. / two hours earlier... / why do my armpits taste like LSD?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=124
Anomaly - VGA Creativity Terrax 5000: Terrax 5000 has found a new way of dealing with humans that does not involve the use of a death ray. / Terrax 5000: Terrax 5000 noticed that humans are not educated in a way that permits them to understand VGA graphics. / Off Panel Man: Hey, Terrax 5000, I'm glad you came! There certainly isn’t enough pussy-ass robots at this party! / {{Pixelated middle finger}}
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=125
The Charles Era - The Lonely Giant it's really hard being a giant. we aren't welcome in most towns. / hey! / you also have to watch out for little people or else they go squish. it's a terribly lonely life. / damnit, Tom! / you're not a giant, and can you please pull my head out of your ass?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=125
 
Anomaly - Motorcycle Safety Kip: Buppo, that motorcycle stunt you did at the stadium didn't turn out as good as we had hoped. / Mr. Buppo: What are you talking about? I jumped over all twelve babies! / Kip: Yeah, but it doesn't count when you land on the thirteenth. / Mr. Buppo: Well I needed some kind of landing pad! I could've gotten hurt!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=126
The Charles Era - The Happiest Story Ever Hyper Death Babies presents... / The Official Happiest Story Ever!! / sit down, son, and listen to the Happiest Story Ever. / wow! Happiest Story Ever? gotta listen! / there was a boy once. / the boy's arms were made of celery. / of celery? / shut the fuck up. / no one liked this Celery-Arm Boy. / so one day he decided to leave town. / town / a week later he came across a town made of Celery-Arm People. / and everyone was happy. / we're really happy. / golly gee! that WAS the happiest story ever! / then they murdered him in his sleep because he smelled like ass. / RIP / but how is that happy? / because people who smell like ass are retarded.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=126
Anomaly - Stop In the Name of Love Stop! In the name of love! / and because you are hiding six kilos of cocaine in your pussy.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=127
The Charles Era - Butt Questions Psychic Dragon, where do butts come from? / from an even larger butt that produces butts. / where does the even larger butt come from? / from an even bigger... / it's a secret.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=127
Anomaly - Hiring Day [[Hiring Day]] / Mr. Willington: Do you have any particular skills? / Karate Ken: I can karate chop the living fuck out of your desk. / Mr. Willington: Can you work on weekends? / Terrax 5000: Terrax 5000 will destroy your weekends! / Mr. Willington: I'm sorry, cow, we just don't have the resources to hire you right now. / Cow: Did I mention I am an African American cow? / Mr. Willington: Hired!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=128
The Charles Era - Robot Life being a robot is hard sometimes. / every time things start looking up, something bad always happens. / hey, robot! / what is it, kind human? / i have some candy for you! / wow! really? / no. you're dumb!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=128
Anomaly - Species Equality Cow: I believe in equality for all creatures. / Cow: There's not a single day that a little boy or girl sees me for what I am on the inside. / Cow: But I have hope in humanity... / Cow: I think one day humans and cows will be able to walk hand-in-hoof together as one. / Cow: Thank you. / <> / [[comic sponsored by Bernie's Burgers]] / [[Best mutilated cow in town!]]
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=129
The Charles Era - Call *ring* *ring* *ring* / hello? / hey, man. what's up? / nothing... so who is this? / look behind you. / hi! / i gotta go... some ass keeps staring at me.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=129
Anomaly - Turtobot? Unfunny Jokes with Mona Lisa by Leonardo da Vinci / Mona Lisa: What do you get when you cross a turtle with a robot? / Mona Lisa: I don't know either. But you have to admit, it would be pretty fucking sweet!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=130
The Charles Era - Airplane Boy look, mom! i'm an airplane! / that's nice dear!... ... god, what a retard. / nyeeerrrrmmmmm! / NOOO! / CRASH! / why do they never listen?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=130
 
Anomaly - Punchline Kip: So, Buppo, why don't you tell the kids a few of your famous jokes? / Mr. Buppo: Okay. A long time ago there was a puppet who peed in a kid's mouth at a birthday party... / Mr. Buppo: Then his parents called the cops which, in turn, made the puppet have to kill the kid to hide the evidence. / Kip: Hahaha. Oh, Buppo, where do you get your ideas from? / <> / Police: Freeze, mother fuckers!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=131
The Charles Era - Redville the Reading Bear hey, kids! i'm glad you showed up for school today... because we have a special guest!! / it's Redville the Reading Bear! / yayyyy! / grarrrr!! / *riiip* / NOOOO! dang it! / WAAAHH! / REDVILLE the Reading Bear / reading is fun, kids!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=131
Anomaly - Adventures in Space {{Astronaut travels through space and comes to a satellite.}} / <> / <> / <> / {{World blows up}} / Lance: Fuck.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=132
The Charles Era - Harvest Season II Farmer Feet Made of Jet Packs! hurry! i need your help! / 2 hours later / oh, wait... / never mind.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=132
Anomaly - More Adventures in Space [[Adventures in Space]] / Lance: Uh oh! A tiny planet is in my trajectory! / Lance: And without my harness, I can't maneuver past it! / Lance: Ah. Oh well. I suppose a body of such small mass can't possibly support life. / {{Ass on planet}} / Oorlak: Father! Father! The great ass of retribution has finally come!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=133
The Charles Era - Heaven wow! this is heaven? / i guess. / so God is just a giant talking face? / my other form is too beautiful for mortal eyes to see. / yeah right! i bet you don't even have another form! / shut up, Timmy! i do so! / fine. BUT BRACE YOURSELF FOR THE LORD'S SPLENDOR! / BLAM!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=133
Anomaly - Even More Adventures in Space [[Adventures in Space]] / Lance: A NASA spacecraft! No! I'm going the wrong way! I'm going to miss it and I'll be lost out here in space forever with no oxygen in a few days! I'M GOING TO DIE!! / <> / {{floats away}} / Lance: Crisis averted! / [[Dear readers, The creator of Anomaly would like to specify that this is not a comic about scatological humor. It is a educational comic about the physics in space and the propelling power of methane gas, also known as "farts". He would also like to add that in space, no one can hear you shit. Thank you.]]
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=134
The Charles Era - Makeshift Prayer hello, God. can i please have a pony? i love ponies!! / Michelle, what are you doing up? it's time for bed! / KICK ASS!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=134
Anomaly - A Day at the Barber's Barber: Yes, yes... Just as I thought. / Customer: What? / Barber: Did you know that poop doesn't make very good hair gel?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=135
The Charles Era - The Forest of Fun: Part 1 hey, Tree! check out this sweet trick! / that's pretty gay, kid. but check this out. / but you're just smoking marijuana! that's not a trick! / i know. the trick is that my friend Wrabbit just killed your parents. / this forest sucks ass.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=135
 
Anomaly - All-Purpose Tool Wife: Honey! You fixed the clog in the sink so FAST! What's your secret? / Husband: Penis enlargement pills! / Wife: How did that help you with the...
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=136
The Charles Era - The Forest of Fun: Part 2 I HATE THE FOREST OF FUN! / hey, that's a pretty mean thing to say! / who are you? / i'm Stick. / they call me that because i'm a stick... made out of sticks. / you seem pretty rad, Stick! / thanks! do you wanna play? / sure! i'd love to play! / okay. put me up your butt-hole. / 2 hours later... / this game sucks. / hey, kid. what's brown and sticky? / hehehe. me! hehehe. / the sticks in this forest sure do suck, don't they.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=136
Anomaly - Zombie Awareness Week Zombie: Hurrrr... / Doctor: Well, our tests show that you are most definately a zombie. / Zombie: BRAAAINS / Doctor: You're right. It could be tuberculosis. I'll do another check.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=137
The Charles Era - The Forest of Fun: Part 3 i gotta get out of the Forest of Fun! i'm not even having fun! / hi, i'm Koala Larry! and i wanna be your friend. / you... aren't going to eat me or kill me or anything, are you? / heck no! why would i do that? i only eat leaves! / hey, Bill! check out this sweet leaf costume i bought! / no! don't touch Bill! he eats leaves! / i do not! / quick, hide in my mouth before he eats you!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=137
Anomaly - Makeshift Creativity Barber: Jake, I've got good news and bad news. / Jake: I don't like the sound of this... / Barber: The GOOD news is that I covered up the giant bloody hole in your head. / Jake: HEY, WAIT! I didn't have a bloody giant hole in my head when I came in here! / Barber: Oh, good. You already know about the bad news, then.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=138
The Charles Era - Building Character My parents used to want me to do something nice for people. so i would go down to the retirement homes every week and read to old people. but i would only read out of the obituaries section. and every time i read the name of the person who died, i would replace it with the old person's name instead. i may be going to hell, but watching scared old people crap their pants sure is fun! / News
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=138
Anomaly - Adam and Steve Jesus: Father? Some of the people are saying that you think homosexuals should be punished. / God: What? Of course not! How the hell do you think people are supposed to breed? / Jesus: Um... through vaginal insertion. / God: What?! / God: Michael, you idiot! You got their holes mixed up!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=139
The Charles Era - Disguise EYEBALL! / CIRCLE MONSTER! / these are the only two things a nipple can disguise itself as.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=139
Anomaly - How to Make Super Awesome Comics [[How to Make Super Awesome Comics]] / [[Establish the characters...]] / Kip: How are you today, Mr. Buppo? / Mr. Buppo: I am fine, Kip. How are you? / [[Then... Conflict!]] / {{dinosaur}} / <> / [[Resolution...]] / Kip: Whew! Thank god you had your dinosaur repellant on you, Buppo! / [[The outcome...]] / Mr. Buppo: I think I just shit on your lap.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=140
The Charles Era - God Damnit! dear holy God, can i have my other leg back? / dear not holy Tom... damn, Tom! / if i give you your leg, then i gotta give everyone back their legs... / and before you know it, there's people with two legs running around everywhere! / yeah? so? / so... um. hang on. / HELLO! WHO THE CRAP ARE YOU? / i'm The 6,446,131,400 Legged Monster! / aren't i cute? everyone loves me! / you know, God, your heat vision sure is getting uncomfortable.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=140
 
Anomaly - Time For a Raise Mr. Willington: Hello, Hank. I just wanted to say that I got your letter. And there's nothing to be ashamed of. / Mr. Willington: I love you too, Hank. I have always loved you. / Hank: Sir? What are you talking about- / Mr. Willington: Shhh! Don't spoil this magical moment! And about what you said in the note... I want to make love to your butt TOO, Hank. / Hank: Let me see that! / {{blank paper}}
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=141
The Charles Era - The Guy Gets The Girl In The End Tokyo... / Godzilla! / explosion! / banana taking a crap! / fiesta? / America, a wig store... / hey, you're hot! / i know!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=141
Anomaly - Attack From Above Hank: Sam! Sam! You'll never believe what just happened! / Sam: You peed off a balcony and accidently hit someone in the eye. / Hank: Yes! How did you know? / {{with eyepatch}} / Sam: And you have a urinary tract infection.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=142
The Charles Era - Pete Meets an Alien oh, my god. are you an alien? / i am not an alien. i was born and raised in the great city of Earth. / and look, i poop kittens just like the other humans. / meow! / it's my turn! kitty. get in my butt! / now teach me how to do that! / okay, now what do i do?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=142
Anomaly - They Never Come Easy Master William: Jenkens! I need baby oil! And lots of it! / Jenkens: We don't have anymore, sir. You used it all when you got that walrus stuck in the toilet. / Master William: Damn! Do you think cooking oil would be harmful to a sea lion? / Jenkens: Sir, I hate to ask this. But are you shitting semi-aquatic mammals?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=143
The Charles Era - Knight and Unicorn onward, Perkins the Unicorn! we have much to see! / oh, no! you'd better hold on to my horn! / why? you're not even walking. / just shut up and like it! / shortly... / horn juice is delicious!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=143
Anomaly - Heads Up So, I've got to warn you. The last client I had ran out screaming with his scalp on fire. / WHAT?! / Hahaha. I'm just fucking with you. I've never cut hair in my life. Only ears.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=144
The Charles Era - Harvest Season III a guy made fun of me today. it's because i'm a super hero. / called me gay. / so i porked him. i think he learned his lesson.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=144
Anomaly - Amazing Illusions! AMAZING ILLUSIONS! / Step 1: Stare at the picture of the dragon for 15 seconds. / Step 2: Look at a white wall. / Step 3: You should see the word "gullible" appear on the wall. If not, try again but grunt a little.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=145
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 1 hey, Charles. what're you doing? / sword fighting. / but those aren't swords. those are... / my legs.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=145
 
Anomaly - Cutting Edge Technology Stew, these new pots you bought me are so durable! / Yes, honey. That's because they're made out of real ground-up Chinese baby bones. / What?! / Hahaha! Relax, honey, I'm just kidding. Baby bones are too soft when you grind them up. / Whew! You really had me going there for a bit.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=146
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 2 dang, man! sorry about eating your legs! / wait, i've got an idea. / Charles's stomach / Charles? why is all my stuff down here?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=146
Anomaly - Men vs Women Men vs Women / Who tells better stories? / So I was having coffee with Tina, who was only in town for a week but decided not to tell her parents that she was pregnant... / One time I farted and blamed it on the dog. / Men: 1 / Women: 0 / Dog: -1
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=147
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 3 hey, Charles, have you seen my son? / no. / mom? i'm in his stomach! Charles ate me! help! / he could die in there! did you eat my son? / no. / ... and by no, i mean yes. / hahaha! i get it!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=147
Anomaly - Everyone Trusts a Gentleman Gentlemen DON'T say... / Everyone, run! There's a dinosaur coming! Its going to eat us all! / Gentlemen DO say... / {{Dinosaur with monacle and top hat.}} / Pish posh! Nothing but rubbish! Simple stereotypes conceived by the common mind of a lesser man.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=148
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 4 i want you to get out of there right now! / but, mom, it wasn't my fault. Charles ate me and- / i mean it mister! / hey, Charles! / hello! / well, i gotta go. later, man!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=148
Anomaly - Father/Son Moments Son, its about time I teach you about the birds and the bees. / You see, son... Sometimes when a man loves a woman... well... / He does strange things to her rectum. / Does this have anything to do with why we're escaping the police in my go cart? / You catch on quickly. Step on it, kid.
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=149
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 5 i know you ate my son! / and i want you to poop him out right now! / *pop* / look, mom! we're a pony! / rreeeeee!
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=149
Anomaly - The Atheist Within Father? Which came first, the chicken or the egg? / Neither. The chicken evolved from a single celled organism. / So evolution IS true, then? / Yes, the atheists are right about everything actually. / But that means that you can't exist! / That's not exactly true. / My name is Perry. I'm fixing your roof, remember?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=anomaly&comic=150
The Charles Era - He's Sword Fighting: Part 6 dear God, we're tired of being a two-headed pony freak. / dear Two-Headed Pony freak... i'm tired of being God. wanna switch? / HECK YES! / MAGIC HAPPENING / wow. so this is what earth is like. / hello there, little friend. what's your name? / i wanna eat your head. / Iwannaeatyourhead? that's such a cute name! / haha! wait, no it isn't! / anything is possible with friendship! / ... and a no-legged man half way in your ass. / THE END?
http://www.hyperdeathbabies.com/index.php?dir=hyperdeathbabies&comic=150
 

Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 >>