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|Historically Accurate||R. Washington: Hamilton! You let my subscription to the New Yorker lapse again! / R. Alexander Hamilton: Mr. President, your brusque manner is inconsistent with the historical record. / R. Washington: In case you can't read the name tag, it's R. George Washington. The "R" is for robot. So there are bound...|
|Our Lives, Our Fortunes, and Our Processed Snack Foods||R. Thomas Jefferson [typing]: Rising obesity may present the most serious danger to the America's children. As the archetypal junk food, corn-dogs are a moral obscenity and must be eliminated. / R. George Washington: But Sir, you are eating a corn-dog right now! / R. George Washington: How can a robot...|
|The Return of Aaron Burr||R. Thomas Jefferson: R. Aaron Burr, my old, other nemesis. The weather at your Parallel White House on Mars not to your liking? / R. Alexander Hamilton: How...? / R. George Washington: Masons. We got stuff that makes Moonraker look like Tamagotchi. / R. Aaron Burr: Sir, I take great offense to some of...|
|Reunion||R. Washington: Animatronic Roll call: R. Alexander Hamilton, R. John Adams, R. Henry Knox, and I'm R. George Washington. / R. Washington: R. Thomas Jefferson couldn't make it... He's busy trolling U-Haul parking lots for cheap labor to tear-down and rebuild Monticello again. Apparently the eaves need...|
|Staff Meeting||R. George Washington: Before we start, I'd like to attend to a few administrative matters. / R. George Washington: First off: Check your email during meetings if you must, but please don't leave and go home to check your actual mail. I'm looking at you, Adams. / R. George Washington: Hamilton: we all...|
|The Singularity is Coming! The Singularity is Coming!||R. George Washington: At the end of the day, the best part of robothood isn't the super-speed or the power to crack open those ridiculous Hessian helmets. / R. George Washington: It's not being sick all the time! When I was a man, I couldn't turn around without contracting smallpox or hemorrhoids or...|
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