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Wanna see my trouser snake / Absolutely / God stop You're pissing all of us off Just screw already / I guess it is time to take our next step / First Date Hold Hands Kiss Goodnight First Base Second Base Third Base Hanky Panky First Argument Sleep Together Only literally Live Together Play Scrabble See Each Other Naked Meet His Parents Meet Her Parents Get a Pet Lust Openly Name Potential Children Stare into Each Others' Eyes / You're meeting my parents / As long as you leave / Since when do I call pants trousers anyway |
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Here we are / So this is where all those forged letters went / bark bark / Walkies / My parents had to 've heard the craft land They'll be out soon / Walkies / Mommy This is my boyfriend / Hi / Oh Huh. |
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So this is another one of your boyfriends huh What's his name / His name is Walky / That's the dog's name / You named him after the dog / She has some very fond memories of that dog / Dude Indiana Jones |
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I swear his name is Walky mother / His real name / Fine His real name is David David Walkerton / Yeah Walky suits him better / Rats |
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So mom and dad are preoccupied with the SEMME craft now / This is an old dog ain't it / He's probably about twelve years old now So yeah He's old / How'd you get him / When I was little I suddenly started crying a lot And I couldn't sleep So they got me a puppy / I remember when I went to college I had to bring all my stuffed animals because I couldn't sleep without something close / Sorta silly if I think about it / You might say I've traded up for something slightly more sapient / Still messy though |
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Hey can I get a glass of water sir / Certainly First cupboard on the right / You know you don't have to go along with this / What / She brings in boyfriends all the time / I am her boyfriend / Sure you are What's her favorite movie / The Sound of Music / What's she look like first thing in the morning / Like an angel / Honestly / Like Benji |
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When I told you to live your own life Joyce I never said / Mom Leave Walky alone / Well I meant the whole alien thing / But sure Walky too / Mother I love him / That's impossible / Because I know you're a lesbian / WHAT |
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Mom I do not like girls / I should have expected this All the signs / Always trying to please us by bringing in boys you weren't involved with / Mom / It all came together when you kissed that girl on tv / Mother that was Walky / Oh / Has he considered a haircut / If I weren't abducted I'd have run away anyway |
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You mean Walky is the real deal / Yes / I can have grandkids / Um well maybe later but / Thank god Let's go / What Don't I have brothers They can do that / They've all failed me You're it / All right You both know where it fits Start crackin' / Can I finish my water / No |
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Y'ain't gettin' nowhere with your pants on C'mon / Mommy no I have a job / Carol Settle down Off / B but Hank / Maybe you two should hide out in your room for a while / Gladly / Your nice soundproof room With a bed / Do it for my birthday |
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I need grandchildren Hank I'm pushing 55 / Even if that kid's the father / Yes he's short but the kids'd be cute and I'd be dead 'fore height mattered / I've just waited so long / It took her this long to get a boyfriend Can you imagine how long to reproduce / Well / Is that Barry White / Who |
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I just want to have a normal conversation with her / Is that so much to ask / Hey all my mom talks about is SEMME politics / Man the only toys you had were my little ponies / Bummer / So much for my idyllic home life Everything seemed so great before but either I changed or they changed or / I'd say you did I've found three bibles so far You don't have any of these back at SEMME huh / What I still believe in god / Oh me too / Really / Yes His name is the Cheese an' he kicked my butt / Walkerton |
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Dinner / Oh no / Don't you worry about them I shall be strength for two / 'Kay / What's for dinner / Whipped cream / fsssss / W Walky Strength for two / T t two |
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Snap out of it / Oops / Back into your room I have a plan / Good / Joyce prepare for funky monkey love / Now take off your clothes / Whose side are you on |
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No seriously Throw your clothes out the door If your parents think we did it they'll leave you alone / But / Great I'm stuck in one of those stupid teen movies / Y'know I seem to get naked now with alarming regulari / What are you / You can't just waste all this whipped cream |
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Oh Joyce you are so darn sexy / Um uh thanks / I simply must have you in the here and now / Here and now You are most generous / Oh you naughty little thing / I want your throbbing man meat / My what now / I picked it up somewhere |
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Well time to hop around on your bed / What already / What do you mean already / You should take your time / But we're just pretending / hmph / Fine How long is our imaginary foreplay 'Bout a minute or so / Half an hour |
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Squeaky squeaky / Woo / Uhhh / did I pooter or somethin' |
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This is ridiculous This is a mockery of everything we're about / Sorry / No listen / Look at what we're doing hopping up and down naked on my bed and to avoid what Why are we going through such insane lengths not to / y'know / Because we're not ready / Why is that / Because you because I'm trying to wait for when you / No Forget me Tell me what you want |
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I don't want to pressure anything / Why / I pressure you all the time To sit up straight to go to dance clubs to be the good leader I know you can be / And I'm starting to feel selfish / A relationship has to be 50/50 A give and take / So again / what do you want |
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How come you keep makin' me be serious when I'm naked / Answer the question / I feel ashamed of sayin' this but I'd really like to jump your bones / All these false starts are drivin' me nutty / But your feelings matter more than that to me It's a scary step / Just 'cuz something's scary doesn't mean it's bad Walky / I think you're just gonna have to take my hand and then we'll face it / Whatever whenever you decide I trust we'll be ready |
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Well look who's emerged / Is dinner ready / Sure Sit down while I go pick up / This is good I think she'll be normal now / Coo' / This shirt is licked dry No wonder you picked him / Eventually |
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Bye mother Thanks for the meal / Nice meetin' ya / So you really think we're ready / All I said was to pick a date / Sweet What like my birthday / Mayb / Joe What's wrong / It's like millions of hormones cried out in terror and were silenced / Supply Closet |
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You brought your old bible with you / Yeah I guess / Heh when we get back I wouldn't let Mike see that thing / Yeah You're right |
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Hmph I did fine without this for four years Why did I bring it home |
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So where we goin' anyway / East coast That's where they are / They / Ah wish you'd tell me more about what we're doing Ah feel a little uneasy You're not bein' straight with me / I'll tell you when I feel like it Not right now There's some very personal issues involved / C'mon tell me Yer drivin' me crazy What kind of person keeps these things secret / Fine then If you're just bein' contrary then ah don't care / Very well / Ah hate you |
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Have you established my alibi Doc / Joe you're just here for technical support not to traffic illegal drugs / SEMME LABS / I just don't want the SEMME honeys around here to catch wind that I'm a science geek or something I wanna get laid again in my lifetime / Science is like some sort of virgin mafia Once you get sucked in you ain't gettin' out alive / Gee thanks a lot / Doc do you see any chicks 'round here / Chicks / The prosecution rests |
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SEMME's exposure to the public has lifted many strict limits on our technology We no longer have to worry that our weaponry and vehicles are quiet and easily concealed / SEMME craft / Furthermore our budget has exploded giving us room for augmentation / Like Britney's chest / Yes / We're looking for new developments in the battleship and mech classes I've assigned Dina as your partner I trust you'll keep this professional / Oh like I'm going to be seen making moves on one of Walky's girls |
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Current technological needs must focus on combatting powerful entitites such as the Cheese / Sounds fun / Hey Joe what are you doing around these parts / Grace We're we're uh talking about our sexual conquests / I haven't had any sexual conquests / Maybe she prefers the term sexual experiences / Scientific research if you don't mind / Oooh I just learned a new euphemism |
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You have a certain way with people / I do don't I / Can you teach me / You want to seduce women too / No I just want / I can almost see that actually It'd explain a lot / Listen to me / All right you get the hot tub I'll get the coeds and I'm sure one of us can scrounge up a camera from place We'll also need whipped cream peanut butter and / LET ME EXPLAIN / Make yourself noticed Thus endeth the first lesson |
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