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Why would my answer matter Would you take my word at face value Would that not require faith in its veracity / I I just need to know / I don't want to have to throw away my life for what may or may not be true / The greater part of hope is patience I cannot tell you the ending or I will be cheating you the growth of your character / But / But what if I'm wrong / Then the decision was at least your own |
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Spread out an' search troops an' keep in touch There's a temporal anomaly 'round here somewhere an' we'll search all of Canada if we got to / Your mom was right It is like spring here / Feeling better / No / 7 Banana Republic / 6 km / We'll be here in the battleship if you need us 128 / Daisy's right We don't know what's behind this anomaly Could be the Cheese or British ninjas or who knows / I hope it's the Head Alien / He's the least threatening / He's funny |
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Intelligence reports that this area is subject to bursts of chrono inactivity Intelligence needs to use smaller words / Did he see you next to the couch in the morning / I got up first he woulda been angry with me anyway / One of Big Boss' concerns is that we might get all frozen too just like the natives / Not unlike the communism that has kept a python like death grip on this country / Canada isn't communist / As Tony demonstrates its seduction strikes swiftly and unseen |
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'Kay Robin you're fast right Check out all the stores downtown / You fly up an' check out the school / Joe an' Tony you check out the houses along this street / Where you headed / Canadian Taco Bells got french fries man / No fair / Call me a connoisseur of foreign cuisine |
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I want to know how this small town barely gots a mall but it can support fourteen Tim Horton's / An' it sucks to see all these donuts go to waste just sittin' in those time frozen palms for months / Whoa / You know some of us are too busy breaking and entering to steal all the food / mmmm / Tastes like May |
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Guys I think I found it There's a big hole in the roof of the school / Robin can you get there fast / Uh I just ate 1873 donuts / Goin' down / Fine I guess that means I'm closest / I'm inside the roof and it's pitch black / I'm gonna get my flashlight / AAEEIE |
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Allow me to shed some light / The Cheese is mine now I froze him this morning / I'd say it's about time / I've been here for freakin' ever testing out this nifty new gun I built from info I gleaned from those sci fi fans I was starting to think you'd forgotten about me / You can stop time / It's still in beta stage Results may vary / Why Canada / I figgered who'd #in' notice / Goddamn was I right / Seriously how've you been |
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Prepare to join the Cheese in permanent lights out / Darkness suits me fine / No You foo / PUNT / BRZZAPP |
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What happened / Heck if I know Where's the Head Ali / What's with your voice / Get the light |
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Oh oh my god / hrrgh / I'm a / Okay Ultimate test / EEEEEE / All right / Who stole Lil' Walky |
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Hey wasn't there a giant monkey here too / Giant ape / Giant robot ape / Please tell me my mindlink with my jetpack still works / C'mon / And get your hand outta your pants / Oh right |
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Walky / Um Walkette / WHAM / This is too much to deal with / We'll regroup / Hey / and return for the Cheese / Yeah um Walkie while I got a captive audience I want to talk about our relationship / Talk about our / You're the girliest guy / I got more body hair than you did / Okay I think I'm going to be sick |
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Aw geez my whole dang balance is off / Food / Yer tellin' me I'm glad I can fly / That's why I had to get us out of there We need to get accust / tummm / What / N nothing / Just distracted / So do you think my boobs are more or less shapely than yours were / I don't know |
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Walkie we need to talk / I've had enough talking outta you from the last 24 hours / Maybe this whole deal is to remind us how much we depend on each other Maybe god / Okay fine The following is translated for the religion impaired / We need to talk apologize and be happy again Not only for our sake but for the good of the team / The problem Joyce is you don't realize that this was never ever about us |
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We don't have to be angry Walkie just let us talk / I'm not makin' up with no guy / Maybe I'll call you Jayce / In case you haven't noticed we may have been gender swapped but we're both still heterosexual / Heck no I ain't never liking no guys I'm gonna be the most lesbian girl you've ever seen / Wait Joe radios that he and Tony are on their way here / Ohmygosh / Does my hair look okay |
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Finally / You're all mine / After decades of playing second banana under your nigh omnipotent reign I've got you here / Just for me / I wonder should I crack open Pandora's box Explore the you that exists inside Reveal the ghost in the machine / I'd know all your secrets / Life's so rad / Because of course my questions are rhetorical I've already done that and more I own you I know you and I will exploit this knowledge like only I know how / As the saying goes / Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned |
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Do you see Joyce or Walky anywhere Their locators said they were here / Let me look over there / Well what have we here / Time to sample the frozen natives / AAAAAAGH / AAAAIEEGGH |
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Huh And so the screaming starts / FWAM / Whoa I'm totally sorry I didn't see y / You're not frozen You're SEMME / It's me Robin / Holy s# Joyce you're a guy / What's it like / Like keeping a little dog around that barks at everything |
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This must be punishment for inviting those hookers to my bar mitzvah / Wow Joe you've got a firm grip / Sal / Heck no Mr. Muscles The Head Alien shot Joyce and I with some kinda gender ray / Um / What's it like / Like all the voices in my head are gone 'cept for one / And that voice wants matching shoes / Sal |
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Joyce Holy crap What did they do to you / Hey lay off / I don't think he looks half bad / It sorta helps that I haven't seen myself in a mirror yet I'm rather afraid to / That's about all that's keeping me from freaking out right now / Speak for yourself I'm castrated / I'm assuming command |
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What 'cuz I'm a girl now / No Because you're disoriented / 'Cuz I'm a girl / Because you're freaking out / Am I / Maybe the problem is ya jus' want a kiss from yer ol' ex girlfriend hmm / You stop freaking out And keep your issues to yourself / Yes sir / Just following your example sir |
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Walkie Tony's concerns do have some merit / Fine / Well since you asked nicely I'll appoint one of you to keep me from freaking out / Joe's master of macho 'round here right It'll be his job to make sure I'm still my ol' manly self / 'Kay / Okay now Joe and I are gonna scope out the van You Scooby and Shaggy look for the aliens |
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All right all right so maybe I am distracted a little by my gender change / B. Parks / And Joe was right for pulling me back to you guys / And maybe we should infiltrate the school and stop the Head Alien / And maybe we should try to do this in disguise / R. Smith / But / I'd feel so angry if I didn't feel so pretty / I've finally decided that he creeps me out more than you do / Finally / Transgendered schoolgirls huh I think I've been this spam |
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Crap here come some aliens Everybody pretend to be time frozen / Man this place is boring We've been stuck in the eighties like forever / What / The eighties This is Canada you loser / Well then explain the big hair and the eccentric music and the Michael J. Fox |
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Sensitive Scanner squad 128 must be regrouping Surely you can pinpoint their position in town / Bitch you're such a nag / Nag Scanning is your job You're a computer You do as I say when I tell you to do it / Look save your oxygen and go fix me some damn pie toots / I / Heavens Curse this gender bender / I don't suppose this might be some sort of karma at work / Baaalls |
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BOOF / What the / I thought I sealed the roo / Cute / But you're out of your league now 128 You're messing with Hedy Alien / That's Hedley / Shut up Scanner |
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Go / What no go Man I'd heard stories about your lousy leadership but I guess you really do have to be there / Change us back Head Alien Get your gun thing and change us both back / Seriously Don't you think that if changing back were possible I'd have already fixed myself I don't walk in heels for my health / Sad to see those poker faces die though |
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What / It's true Instead of merely messing with time the cannon I created jumbles with the fabric of the universe The localized overuse has turned the cannon's results completely random / For example when I tried to un girl myself it changed one of my vestigial organs into a Far Side calendar / WAAAHHH / I don't wanna be a stupid loser girl the rest of my life / I do |
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Heh I still got it / Not all of us are so easily distracted / Y you wouldn't hit a lady would you / Well no wait I guess you would / NO |
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