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time has become unglued! Narrator: A FAILED EXPERIMENT HAS CAUSED TIME TO BECOME UNGLUED! / T-Rex: Oh no! / Narrator: EFFECT PRECEDES CAUSE! / T-Rex: It's a disaster! / Narrator: CAN NOTHING BE DONE TO RESTORE THE NATURAL ORDER? / Dromiceiomimus: T-Rex, this is no time to begin stomping on houses! / T-Rex: What? I already stomped...
time has become unglued! Narrator: A FAILED EXPERIMENT HAS CAUSED TIME TO BECOME UNGLUED! / T-Rex: Oh no! / Narrator: EFFECT PRECEDES CAUSE! / T-Rex: It's a disaster! / Narrator: CAN NOTHING BE DONE TO RESTORE THE NATURAL ORDER? / Dromiceiomimus: T-Rex, this is no time to begin stomping on houses! / T-Rex: What? I already stomped...
time has become unglued! Narrator: A FAILED EXPERIMENT HAS CAUSED TIME TO BECOME UNGLUED! / T-Rex: Oh no! / Narrator: EFFECT PRECEDES CAUSE! / T-Rex: It's a disaster! / Narrator: CAN NOTHING BE DONE TO RESTORE THE NATURAL ORDER? / Dromiceiomimus: T-Rex, this is no time to begin stomping on houses! / T-Rex: What? I already stomped...
we can sexy all night long T-Rex: Man, forget verbs! / T-Rex: You heard me! / T-Rex: From now on, I am all about other, less complex parts of speech. Verbs don't understand me! / Dromiceiomimus: Maybe you don't understand verbs? / T-Rex: Maybe ADJECTIVES wouldn't force us to have such conversations! / Utahraptor: Okay T-Rex,...
canadians drink bags of milk, i guess you should know this T-Rex: Someone at my house finished off a bag of milk, and then put it back in the fridge without replacing it with a new bag! / T-Rex: That's so annoying! / T-Rex: Also, it's very confusing since I live alone! / T-Rex: What do you think, Dromiceiomimus? Am I going crazy? Am I finishing off the milk...
SECRETS OF THE MEDICAL PROFESSION T-Rex: Ssh! Come closer! / T-Rex: I know secrets! / T-Rex: SECRETS OF THE MEDICAL PROFESSION! / Narrator: T-REX IN: SECRETS OF THE MEDICAL PROFESSION / Dromiceiomimus: Oh, is this one of those dumb Conspiracy Secrets, wherein fluoride is actually designed to induce pregnancy in freshly married women...
chicks dig a guy who eats a lot T-Rex: Oh man, I ate too much last night. / T-Rex: Ooooh man! / T-Rex: I had SO much food, Dromiceiomimus. I thought I'd be smart and cook enough food for lunch the next day, but then I ate it all. / Dromiceiomimus: G-great? / T-Rex: Ooooh man! / Utahraptor: Hey, here's a friendly tip: you shouldn't...
 
fifty-two movies in fifty-two days Narrator: "FIFTY-TWO MOVIES IN FIFTY-TWO DAYS" / T-Rex: I challenge myself to watch fifty-two movies in fifty-two days! / Narrator: FIFTY-TWO DAYS LATER: / T-Rex: Some of them were pretty okay, I guess. / T-Rex: *sigh* / Utahraptor: Hey, YOU look like you're feeling a little disillusioned about film! / T-Rex:...
no more secrets of the medical profession T-Rex: Man, my source for medical secrets won't tell me anything now, because I "broke her confidence" when I told everyone about the breathing thing! / T-Rex: Hah hah! / T-Rex: Oh well! / T-Rex: I know tons of secrets about other professions anyway! Dromiceiomimus, did you know that restaurants want...
quite adequate for a man of my racial denomination T-Rex: Submit it to me, youngster! / Indeed, indeed! / Submit it to me youngster! / Indeed, indeed! / Submit it to me, youngster! / Indeed, indeed! / T-Rex: And all the ladies proclaim that I'm quite adequate for a man of my racial denomination! / T-Rex: You are aware of the difficulty entailed in simply...
everyone always talks so classy-like T-Rex: I'm tired of movies and plays and radio dramas in which all the characters have such snappy dialogue! / T-Rex: It's unrealistic! / T-Rex: It really yanks me out of the moment. How am I supposed to imagine myself being there, when everyone talks like they know their lines? / T-Rex: And also, sometimes...
the laws of thermodynamics, personified for reals T-Rex: The first law of thermodynamics: / T-Rex: Important! / T-Rex: The second law of thermodynamics: somewhat less important. / T-Rex: If the laws were personified, I'd feel sorry for the second law! He'd be the affable loser, dressed in his brothers second-hand patchy tweed. Aww! / T-Rex: Well,...
 
clap clap clap The Devil: T-REX WHAT'S GOING ON MAN THINGS ARE PRETTY GREAT EH / T-Rex: What?! Who is this? / The Devil: IT'S ME THE DEVIL / T-Rex: Leave me alone! / The Devil: HEY / The Devil: I HAVE MY OWN PLAYSTATION / T-Rex: So?! / T-Rex: I have my own refrigerator, and you don't see me bragging! / Utahraptor: Who...
best friends edit each other's work T-Rex: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh! / T-Rex: There's water in the basement and I don't know what to do! / T-Rex: If the basement keeps on flooding, then I'll certainly be blue! / T-Rex: The water heater's leaking and my showers are all cold! / T-Rex: I wouldn't mind so much, but it makes me feel so old! / Utahraptor:...
Time to discuss my lovemaking technique! T-Rex: So! / T-Rex: Time to discuss my lovemaking technique! / Dromiceiomimus: whoa whoa whoa! T-Rex! Nobody wants to hear about your lovemaking 'technique'! / T-Rex: Okay, how about my lovemaking strategy? / Dromiceiomimus: No! Good gosh, this talk belongs in the bedroom, IF ANYWHERE! / Utahraptor:...
profits!! T-Rex: By mining the Earth's outer (liquid) core, I can sell precious iron, thereby giving profits to myself and my business partners! / T-Rex: Profits!! / T-Rex: Would you like to buy some PRECIOUS IRON, featuring nickel and trace amounts of lighter elements, Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: No thanks! / T-Rex:...
the best science fiction story idea ever T-Rex: I have come up with the best science fiction story idea ever! / T-Rex: It's about a man... / T-Rex: A man who can only see well when a light is turned on! / Dromiceiomimus: Most guys I know are like that, T-Rex. / T-Rex: But this guy can only see ANYWHERE when a particular light is turned on!...
 
the fallacy of balance Narrator: TALKING DINOSAURS IN: "THE FALLACY OF BALANCE" / T-Rex: The fallacy of balance occurs when news agencies claim truth by reporting "both sides of the story"! / T-Rex: In most cases, that's not balanced at all! / T-Rex: For instance, if you're doing a story on how the sun is hot (assuming it's...
FRIENDS SHOUT THEIR THOUGHTS AT FRIENDS T-Rex: Such a nice day! YES, MAYBE A LITTLE BRISK BUT THAT'S OKAY! / T-Rex: Yes indeed, it is a nice day, to be sure! / Dromiceiomimus: What's with all the shouting, T-Rex? / T-Rex: I THINK THAT'S PRETTY CLEAR, BUT I GUESS I SHOULD ANSWER HER QUESTION. I figure our innermost thoughts are kept privae...
mmmmmmm an excellent game indeed Devil: HEY / Devil: T-REX / T-Rex: ?! / Devil: IT'S THE DEVIL / T-Rex: Leave me alone you crazy bastard! / Devil: HEY / Devil: HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED THE VIDEO GAME "COMMAND AND CONQUER: RED ALERT" / T-Rex: No!! / Devil: THE MAMMOTH TANKS ARE ONE OF THE MORE POWERFUL UNITS IN THE GAME / Devil: THEY PRESENT...
sisterhood T-Rex: So what's the deal with SISTERHOOD? / T-Rex: Hah hah! / T-Rex: Am I right? / Dromiceiomimus: Oh, T-Rex! Are you upset because as a male, you'll never be able to know the small joys and frustrations of having and being a sister? / T-Rex: No way! I know all about sisterhood! I know all about all...
freezing time to live longer T-Rex: I no longer wish to die someday! It's true! I have decided that aging is for CHUMPS. / T-Rex: And as a non-chump, this means I must find a way to be immortal! / Dromiceiomimus: T-Rex, we've gone over this before! Remember? Immrtality could violate conservation of energy laws? Science means that...
 
our first look at the french rap universe T-Rex: There are a few moments in my life at which, I can now see in hindsight, critical events took place. / T-Rex: These events set in motion other events which finally led to the person I am today! / T-Rex: For instance: Dromiceiomimus! Had you and I never met, I would never have become so good...
amusing observations about everyday life T-Rex: Here are some amusing observations about everyday life! / T-Rex: 1) Men stereotypically leave the toilet seat up! / T-Rex: 2) Parking spaces can be rare. / T-Rex: 3) Airplane food? / T-Rex: Well... that's it! / Utahraptor: The first of your "amusing observations" seems almost reverse sexist! / T-Rex:...
sexualized bikes T-Rex: I discovered some bad news yesterday: my bicycle needs a new seat! / T-Rex: The SHAFT upon which the seat is MOUNTED has become bent! / Dromiceiomimus: Whoah, T-Rex! Such sexualized language! / T-Rex: I'm sorry! It's just hard to talk about bicycles without sexualized language. That's the...
spring break!! T-Rex: Spring Break!! / T-Rex: Woooo! / T-Rex: Wooo! / T-Rex: SPRING BREAK! / Dromiceiomimus: Woah, hold up! WHICH spring break, T-Rex? You don't go to school! / T-rex: Nevertheless, I feel I am entitled to one! / T-Rex: Woooo! / T-Rex: Spring break WOOO!! / Utahraptor: You think that if you shout "woo!"...
spring is my favourite season T-Rex: Yes my friends, spring will be coming soon! / T-Rex: Hooray!! / T-Rex: Spring is my favourite season, Dromiceiomimus. Do you know why? / Dromiceiomimus: Nope! / T-Rex: It is my favourite season because it is so pretty! / Utahraptor: Wait - just a few months ago you told me summer was your favourite...
 
you cannot step into the same river twice T-Rex: Today I believe in temporal presentism! Only the objects around me are real. They exist in space, but not in time! / T-Rex: Neither the past nor the future actually exists! / T-Rex: Each moment is unique, and life is but series of moments, connected by our memories! We speak of events occurring...
valentine's day: personal politics T-Rex: Today is Valentine's day! / T-Rex: Hah hah! Sucks to THAT! / T-Rex: I believe it to be a MANUFACTURED HOLIDAY. Last year it brought me nothing but trouble, so this year I am going out of my way to make sure that everyone knows they don't have to celebrate their love if they don't want to! / Utahraptor:...
dinosaur laffs featuring t-rex the dinosaur Narrator: "DINOSAUR LAFFS" featuring t-rex the dinosaur / T-Rex: Hey God! Check this out! / God: OKAY / T-Rex: A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" / God: T-REX I'M GOD AND I SAY THAT IS NOT A VERY GOOD JOKE / T-Rex: What?! It was awesome! / T-Rex: HORSES have long faces! / T-Rex:...
facts which may or may not be true about motorcycle enthusiasts Narrator: FACTS WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT BE TRUE ABOUT MOTORCYCLE ENTHUSIASTS COMICS / T-Rex: Motorcycle enthusiasts call cars "cages"! / T-Rex: Motorcycle enthusiasts enjoy "souping up" their rides almost as much as anime fans enjoy the classic "Battle Angel Alita" graphic novels! / T-Rex: Wow! / Utahaptor:...
happy dog the happy dog T-Rex: My friends, I have written a new book! / T-Rex: A book for CHILDREN! / T-Rex: My book is called "Happy Dog the Happy Dog" and it mixes the story of Happy Dog with important lessons I've chosen about life! It also features adorable drawings of happy dogs. Amazing! / Utahraptor: So let's hear...
 

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