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| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Giant serpentine dollar sign towers over BoxJam's house, with BoxJam with shield and sword]]
/ BoxJam: Do you ever feel like, if you finally paid off everything, a bunch of baby money monsters would grow right back? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990511.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam and Ms. BoxJam sit at a table with a Scrabble board]]
/ BoxJam: The Mrs. and I used to play Scrabble all the time. We were GOOD.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Crane? Crania? Carnie?
/ BoxJam: Peruse? Usurp? Press? Recesses? / [[BoxJam and Ms. BoxJam with Boggle game]]
/ BoxJam: Now we have kids. We believe Boggle was invented for Scrabble lovers whose attention spans are gone.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Tip Pit Bit Bits
/ BoxJam: Tar Rat Tam ?r ?rs / [[Portrait of Shakespeare]]
/ Educational Note: Shakespeare made up words when he wanted. Because he was Shakespeare, they became real words. Nobody ever beat him in Scrabble. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990512.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Man: Hey BoxJam! No, not you.
/ BoxJam Voiceover: So suddenly, there's another guy at work with my name. I hate that. / [[BoxJam throws something over cubicle wall.]]
/ Other BoxJam (Offscreen): Ow!
/ BoxJam Voiceover: OK, BoxJam pretender, defend yourself. I am highly skilled at intra-office war. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990513.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Little BoxJam: Bup-do snowman have blood?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-who raised the first people?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-are you old enough to die?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-where's that thing?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-why don't you do what Michael Jordan does?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-how do you...a binoculator?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-is poo-poo made out of food?
/ Little BoxJam: Bup-will I die before my sister? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990514.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [large, slimy money symbol with angry looking eyes, hands that look like saws and perhaps a tongue, or perhaps flame coming out of its mouth. BoxJam carrying briefcase,walking away from monster]
/ Monster: Mornin', BoxJam.
/ BoxJam: Mornin', Cemolly.
/ Narrator: The Money monster and I have forged an uneasy peace. / [same scene from further out.]
/ Monster: Ms. BoxJam bought a BMW.
/ BoxJam: Liar.
/ Narrator: It makes me nervous. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990517.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [BoxJam lying on couch, hands clasped over his chest. Mrs. BoxJam sitting on chair next to him, holding paper/book/notepad in her hand]
/ Narrator: Mrs. BoxJam wants me to explore *why* another BoxJam in my peer group bothers me.* / *see BoxJam ep. 4/27/99, Ms. BoxJam is a psychologist-- / Omniscient voice {presumably Ms. Boxjam}: THAT'S *DR.* BOXJAM TO YOU. / [small boxjam amidst text]
/ Narrator: Yeah, whatever, I think it's because in 8th grade there were two BoxJam's in my spanish class. He got to be BoxJammo. I had to be Jaime (Hi-may) http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990518.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | After you're web-savvy, you gain an abililty to know what cyber-people you encounter are all about. At this urban legends site*, Illudium Phosdex obviously looks like Dennis the Menace's dad, and eats Cap'n Crunch and watches cartoons all day.
/ *www.snopes.com / "loserboy" at the gil thorp site clearly is a Star Trek geek who rides a hippity-hop, has one eye larger than the other, and drools, baby, DROOLS. / If you look up "box" in user names on AOL, you learn that "box" is often a euphemism for...well, anyway. "BoxJam," anyone can plainly see, must be some kind of major stud. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990519.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | So, "PrimeCo" has this ad campaign where their digital phones are alien technology stolen from a hapless E.T. / Dickheads. Give him a stupid phone. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990520.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[A man and a woman sit on a curb]]
/ Man: Here comes BoxJam... / [[BoxJam approaches]]
/ Man: Good ol' BoxJam, yes, sir... / [[BoxJam looks at him]]
/ Man: No, not you, the other BoxJam... / BoxJam: How I hate him! http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990521.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam, holding a briefcase, at the door to a small, oppressive building]]
/ BoxJam: <<*Sigh*>> http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990524.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam driving a real car-looking car]]
/ BoxJam: I found this radio station that I thought was pretty cool. They play new pop, little bit of an edge. They've heard that the Talking Heads broke up, unlike 'XRT. / BoxJam: An unusual number of liposuction ads, though. Jewelry, too. And most of the callers are married and... / [[Car stops short]]
/ < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990525.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Woman-shaped spot cloud above BoxJam]]
/ BoxJam: Somewhere in my brain, the fleeting image of the body of a woman always resides. / [[The woiman-shaped cloud obscures c++ code BoxJam is writing]]
/ BoxJam: Like I don't have enough distractions. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990526.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Little BoxJam hitting underhand pitches off BoxJam]]
/ BoxJam: Little BoxJam is getting good at hitting balls. He hits them over the nearby fence in the backyard, so I've changed where I stand. / [[Little BoxJam hits the ball over the fence which is now directly behind him]]
/ BoxJam: The kid can really turn on a pitch. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990527.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Ms. BoxJam]]
/ BoxJam: People ask me: "BoxJam, you draw Ms. BoxJam as a major babe. Can she REALLY be that good-looking?" Believe it or not, she's better. / [[Ms. BoxJam with earrings and pearls]]
/ BoxJam: On some nights, when her mom takes the kids and we go out, hubba hubba! The lady looks good in pearls... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990528.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[What Becomes of '80's Tunes in Your Brain when You Have Kids]] / [[BoxJam is changing 'Mina]]
/ BoxJam: She's a very stinky girl...the kind you don't take home to mother...she will never get to funkytown...you know I really need to change her... / [[BoxJam is reading a book to 'Mina]]
/ BoxJam: I wanna see some zoo faces with you, I wanna see some zoo faces tonight... / [[BoxJam is tying Little BoxJam's shoes]]
/ BoxJam: No sneaker no tie, no sneaker no tie. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990531.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Boxjam and Mallethead are standing around]]
/ Narrator (Boxjam): Sometimes I like to 'hang' with my good friend Mallethead. / [[Boxjam and Mallethead are standing around]] / [[Boxjam and Mallethead are standing around]] / [[Boxjam and Mallethead are standing around]] / [[Mallethead is screaming at Boxjam.]]
/ {{Mallethead's text is partly hidden by BoxJam.}}
/ Mallethead: WHADDYA MEAN YOU DON'T LIKE COCONUT!?!?
/ Narrator (BoxJam): I try not to antagonize hime. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990601.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam-ina sucks her thumb]]BoxJam-ina: yoi yoi yoi yoi yoi yoi
/ BoxJam Narrates: My daughter soothes herself by cooing a mantra of "yoi." / [[BoxJam-ina gags self]]Boxjam-ina: ACK! ACK! ACK!
/ BoxJam Narrates: She also sometimes just shoves fingers into her mouth until she gags. / [[BoxJam, looking somewhat irate, drives a car, with BoxJam-ina seated in the back.]] BoxJam-ina: ACK ACK ACK yoi yoi yoi yoi yoi ACK ACK ACK yoi yoi yoi yoi yoi http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990602.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Neighbor: Lecha havit for $4 U.S.
/ BoxJam: Our neighbors across the street are having a garage sale today. Among the crap they're selling is an old, uneven 3-legged table they picked out of our trash once. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990603.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | THE DUCK WAS JUST SITTING OUT THERE ON THE ROAD. SHE WOULDN'T MOVE. / MRS. BOXJAM MADE ME GET OUT AND TRY TO LEAD HER TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD. / SHE JUST FLEW FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD. / {{Actual car drawing - a BoxJam collectible!}} http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990604.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam shows family a chart]]
/ BoxJam Narrating: I explained to my family, that, since the doodles are about our lives, and I can't draw cars, we needed to find alternate transportation. / [[BoxJam and the kids are in a speed boat.]]
/ BoxJam Narrating: This is just temporary, until someone invents those Jetsons cars. I could draw those. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990607.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[2 drawings by Little BoxJam]]
/ [[a person wearing a catcher's or goalie's mask is visible]]
/ Various words on Drawing One: Jacob Cayc Nrtae Hockey Gaygaym! / [[drawing of baseball diamond]]
/ Various words on Drawing Two: Yes Popup IGup Oup Cot UBiayll http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990608.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam tries to put socks on Little BoxJam]]
/ Little BoxJam: I WILL NOT WEAR THESE SOCKIE-POOS!
/ BoxJam Narration: Little BoxJam rages. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990609.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Mallethead despairs of late. He questions the point of carrying on. / Mallet, discover the reward of diligence is diligence. / Does anybody else remember those '70's bibles- "The Way?" It was filled with drawings like these. Well, Mallethead, of course, wouldn't be there. Anyway, he's on a spiritual journey. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990610.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Drawings of BoxJam in various positions]]
/ BoxJam Narration: Little BoxJam is inventing a new game, and decided the first thing to settle on is REFEREE SIGNALS
/ Captions: "Out" "Really Bad, Almost Out, but not Quite" "High Sticking Miss" "Ball" "Banaging" "Stur-rifry" "New Ball" http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990611.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Little BoxJam: BUP, WHERE DO YOU THINK BARNEY GOES TO THE BATHROOM? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990614.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[portrait of Albert Einstein]]
/ Narration: Albert Einstein said that time was an illusion, no matter how persistent. / [[BoxJam holds a screaming 'Mina while Little BoxJam shoots a hockey puck off BoxJam's head]]
/ 'Mina: AAAA! AAAAA! AAAA!
/ Narration: Ms. BoxJam is 3 hours late, but it's an illusion. It's an illusion. IT'S AN ILLUSION. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990615.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | BoxJam Narration: Since this is just drawings, Little BoxJam can get a bit wilder than he does in real life. / BoxJam Narration: On the other hand, I can get rougher too. That's right, my doodle-self through (sic) my doodle-kid. Deal with it. / BoxJam Narration: Or chop off my head. What do I care? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990616.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam watches Little BoxJam pull a string by]] / [[BoxJam watches the rope go by]]
/ BoxJam: ? / [[BoxJam sees that the end of the rope has BoxJam-ina getting dragged around]]
/ BoxJam: Little BoxJam! http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990617.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam on a chair reaching for a ceiling fan]]
/ BoxJam Narration: Ms. BoxJam asked me to securely attach the chains on the ceiling fan. No problem. / [[closeup of chain]]
/ BoxJam Narration: It's a chain like on key chains, and the crimping piece keeps letting go. / BoxJam Narration: Might take a couple of tries, of course. / [[BoxJam angrily crushing a smoldering hunk of, presumably, ceilling fan chain]]
/ BoxJam Narration: A man's most important tool isn't his hammer. And it's not his brain, either. It's the vice-grips. Any widgets that won't cooperate can be crushed into submission. / BoxJam signature: DON'T MESS WITH ME http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990618.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam is seen, driving his "car"]]
/ BoxJam: So I'm driving to work, listening to chick-rock 101.9, and the DJ asks how many words in English have no rhymes, and what are they?
/ BoxJam: I hate that. I know the answer you're supposed to give; it's wrong. There are lots of words with no good rhymes - tincture, picture and butcher come to mind.
/ BoxJam: By the way, duck's quacks do echo. There are animals besides humans and dolphins who "have sex for fun." Fred and Wilma were not the first couple shown in bed together on television. The "Angry/Hungry - what's the third?" thing is a lie, and contradicts further the four-rhyme thing. There are other
/ [[text reaches the bottom of the page as BoxJam rambles]] / [[BoxJam has stepped out of his "car" at a parking lot and his lower half is made up of squiggles]]
/ BoxJam: By the time I got to work, my muumuu was all bunched up in a knot. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/19990621.html |
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