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| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[a completely different, more realistic, drawing style. BoxJam is sitting outside in a chair drinking a beer with a crying penguin on a leash]]
/ Note: Little Boxjam is filling in for me today - /
/ Little BoxJam: Father, I respect and honor you; however, Mother tells me it is inappropriate to bring furniture onto the lawn, wear a bathrobe outside, or abuse harmless penguins.
/ BoxJam: It's a muumuu. Everyone hates penguins. Leave me alone. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000410.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | BoxJam: Bite me! Bite a me mucho! www.biteme.com!
/ Ms. BoxJam: Knock knock. / BoxJam: What?
/ Ms. BoxJam: Knock knock. / BoxJam: Who's there?
/ Ms. BoxJam: Bite. / BoxJam: Bite who?
/ Ms. BoxJam: Bite ME. / BoxJam: Socrates himself would have walked into that trap. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000411.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Caption: The most important class in weather reporter school is sequeway class. If you can't find a way to transition from a story on a charity that knits flags for orphanages to today's weather pattern (asterisk footnote), you're gone. / Footnote: I hope they're using shrink-resistant yarn, because we've got a wet one in store for you! http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000412.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Little BoxJam: Knock knock!
/ 'Mina: Nah-nock
/ Little BoxJam: No, you say 'Who's there?'
/ 'Mina: Nah-nock / Little BoxJam: 'Who's there?'
/ 'Mina: Nah-nock
/ Little BoxJam: *sigh* Nah-nock who?
/ 'Mina: Nah-nock JOKE / Little BoxJam: That doesn't make any sense...
/ 'Mina (thinking): It's deconstructionist humor, Philistine http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000413.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Little BoxJam: I'm going to watch TV!
/ Ms. BoxJam: I thought you said that was a sink. / Little BoxJam: It is, but it's also a TV.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Where can I sit? / Little BoxJam: Same place.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Same place.
/ Little BoxJam: On the sink/TV/chair. / Ms. BoxJam: Well! This is cozy...
/ Little BoxJam It's also the bed, microwave, stereo, phone and table. / Ms. BoxJam: Um, you want some more stuff for your playhouse?
/ Little BoxJam: And the roof. And fourth wall. And... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000414.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | BoxJam: Last year, when you hid the easter eggs, the kids found them in no time.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Yeah - so? / BoxJam: So this year I got a safety deposit box!
/ caption: Cartoonist Unclear on Ripping Off a Lame Idea Award http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000417.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | {{Well, here's one that won't age well}}
/ BoxJam: Hee hee... you know what they say about Al Gore?
/ Ms. BoxJam: What? / BoxJam: He's a very unnatural public speaker - almost wooden.
/ Ms. BoxJam: Yeah. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000418.html |
| Endless Trash | (no words) http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000419.html |
| Even in Death | (Headstone 1): BoxJam
/ (Headstone 2): Ms. BoxJam / *pat pat* / BoxJam: Happy?
/ Ms. BoxJam: Thank you- http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000420.html |
| Deep Conversation over Beers | [[Mallethead and BoxJam at a bar]]
/ BoxJam: But, of course, the whole story is ripped off from the story of the Christ. / Mallethead: RIPPED OFF FROM THE GOSPELS!? YOU'RE NUTS! / BoxJam (list): He was a threat to those in power ~ He had a small band of followers ~ He was persecuted ~ He died ~ He came back to life ~ He left again, but promised to come back again "someday" / << silence >> / Mallethead: SO, UH, YOU TAKE "FROSTY THE SNOWMAN" PRETTY SERIOUSLY.
/ BoxJam: Yep. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000421.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam's dialogue is far, far above him]]
/ BoxJam: Have you seen my muumuu with... / [[The dialogue fades away]] / BoxJam: I'll wait until the helium wears off...
/ [Ms. BoxJam's dialogue appears right over her head]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: Good idea... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000424.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam is holding a piece of candy]]
/ BoxJam: Bonus! I found a cream egg in my candy stash! / Ms. BoxJam: You didn't get any of those in your basket - you must have taken one of the kids'... / BoxJam: There's BLOOD on this cream egg... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000425.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | {{Please don't hate me - some of my best friends are black}}
/ [[BoxJam and Mallethead are sitting at a bar]]
/ BoxJam: We were going to go the coverall route, but she put her foot down - went off, was all "I'm the H.M.I.C!" / < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000426.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | BoxJam: You know, they have "BoxJam's Doodle" in France, but they don't call it "BoxJam's Doodle"
/ Mallethead: WHAT DO THEY CALL IT? / BoxJam: "Les Griffonages de BoxJam." And Mallethead is "Tête de Maillet."
/ Mallethead: HUH / [[BoxJam slips on a banana peel]]
/ Mallethead: I WONDER IF YOU'LL WIN THAT JERRY LEWIS AWARD...
/ BoxJam: Here's hoping...
/ < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000427.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Boxjam's Doodle proudly introduces: Carlotta, the Wise Flaming Duck! / Radio: How man roads must a man travel down, before they can call him a man?
/ Carlotta: Blowin' in the wind... / Radio: Yes an' how many seas must a white dove sail before she sleeps in the sand?
/ Carlotta: Blowin' in the wind... / Radio: Yes, an' how many times must the cannon balls fly before they're forever banned?
/ Carlotta: Again I say, "Blowin in the Wind". / Radio: The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind...
/ BoxJam: Hey you were right! http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000428.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Ms. BoxJam stands over BoxJam, who is kneeling next to an old-time giant radio]]
/ BoxJam: Hey - I'm listening to an old-time radio broadcast from "the golden age of radio!" / Radio Voice 1: Sheriff, the perpetrator of the crime used a left-handed gun.
/ Radio Voice 2: Huh. He must've been left-handed. I'll write that down here with THIS pen I'm holding.
/ Radio Voice 1: That fella that just pulled up outside and walked into the general store looked funny.
/ Radio Voice 2: That he did. Walk with me
/ <<*CLOMP*CLOMP*CLOMP*>>
/ Radio Voice 2: out the door now. OK, we're outside - let's check out this horse that the man was riding that's right here.
/ Radio Voice 1: Whoa, sheriff, this saddle has a name on it. Let's see if we can make it out.
/ Radio Voice 2: The first letter looks like an 'L.' The next one is 'E.' Then comes an 'F.'
/ Radio Voice 1: The next one looks like a 'T,' sheriff.
/ Radio Voice 2: Ayup. Then a 'Y.' L-E-F-T-Y.
/ Radio Voice 1: L-E-F-T-Y...Lefty! Whaddya make of it, sheriff? / BoxJam: The "golden age of radio" is just a lie, isn't it? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000501.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Ms. BoxJam and BoxJam are by an old-time radio]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: My mom listened to all those old radio shows growing up - se says you have to use your imagination to enjoy them. / Ms. BoxJam: While you're listening, try to picture what's really going on... / Radio Voice 1: Welcome to another hilarious episode of "Jiggsy's Tavern!"
/ Radio Voice 2: Hey, shiftless ethnic guy - your tab is $300! Pay up!
/ Radio Voice 3: I no canna pay righ' now!
/ Radio Voice 2: OK, then...
/ <<*SLAP!*>>
/ Radio Voice 3: Owwwooo! / [[Ms. BoxJam pictures two actors standing next to a mike reading the lines in a studio. BoxJam pictures Ms. BoxJam and him exactly where they are, listening to the show.]] http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000502.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Ms. BoxJam: OK - you take Muumuu Street to Sarong Avenue, and take a right on Sarong / Ms. BoxJam: If we miss it, Muumuu Street ends at Toga Place in a 'T' / BoxJam: OK, here's an intersection - which way? / Ms. BoxJam: This is Sarong, it must be right. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000503.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | BoxJam: Foam-henge. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000504.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | {{This comic appeared on 'Cartoonists' Day' - May 5, 2000}}
/ Headnote: I'd tell you "Happy Cartoonists' Day" but I'm not in the union. / [[BoxJam is at a toy piano, with Ms. BoxJam leaning on it. BoxJam is playing, with the music appearing above their heads]] / Ms. BoxJam: Remember that guy who was selling produce out of his El Dorado? / Ms. BoxJam: The guy who looked like Tony Granato - you said he sold a good avocado. / [[BoxJam walks away. Ms. BoxJam doesn't notice.]] / Ms. BoxJam: I never know if you want company when you play. "Test the waters," that's my motto. / [[She notices he's not there.]] / Ms. BoxJam: Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000505.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam is watching TV]] / < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000508.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[Ms. BoxJam is talking to BoxJam, who is wearing a baseball cap.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: You look younger in a baseball cap. / [[They begin walking.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: I don't get why you like baseball so much. / [[They get a ride on a public giant bird.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: I would *get* football. Plenty of action; lots of excitement. / [[They walk toward a stadium.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: Football catches you off-guard; baseball only has subtle changes game to game. / [[BoxJam gives tickets to the guy at the turnstile.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: And then there's the de rigeur cap, and undying loyalty. If your team hasn't won anything in fifty years, too bad. It's still your team. / [[BoxJam orders two of something from the "BEER (n' DOGS)" stand.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: And the number of games! To follow a team, you're talking 162 games every year! What a commitment that requires! / [[They sit down in the stadium, carrying drinks.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam: Plus, what's outside any football game? A party! Games are surrounded by carefree fun! / [[BoxJam finally looks at Ms. BoxJam.]]
/ BoxJam: In other words, football is a no-strings-attached girlfriend. Baseball is a wife. / [[Silence.]] / [[Ms. BoxJam rests her head on BoxJam's shoulder.]]
/ Ms. BoxJam (thinking): Score one for BoxJam...
/ Boxjam (thinking): Score one for BoxJam... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000509.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam and Ms. BoxJam are sleeping. It's dark out. It gets slowly lighter through the comic]] / < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000510.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [['Mina is climbing on BoxJam and spilling a drink. Little BoxJam is hitting him with a hockey stick]]
/ BoxJam: That manacle idea I had is still considered child abuse, isn't it? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000511.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Ms. BoxJam: So you and Bitsy dated for a while - did you guys ever DO anything?
/ BoxJam: Well, ah... you know... / Ms. BoxJam: You did do something! I knew it! Did you get to 3rd base? / Ms. BoxJam: Oh, come on. There's nothing wrong! 2nd base is a given - did you get to 3rd? / Ms. BoxJam: What? / BoxJam: I've never known what 3rd base is. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000512.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | <<*suck* *suck* *suck*>> / <<*drink* *drink* *drink*>> / BoxJam: YECHH / BoxJam: Cold-eze lozenges and gatorade rival orange juice and toothpaste for the worst taste combination of all time. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000515.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | [[BoxJam sits crosslegged in front of BoxJamina]]
/ BoxJam: What would you like to play, BoxJamina?
/ BoxJamina: Party! Party! / [[Ms. BoxJam joins, behind BoxJamina]]
/ BoxJam: Ooh - a party! Maybe a tea party?
/ BoxJamina: Bampur Party!
/ Ms. BoxJam: How about a party where they charge you $5 and then just point you to the keg? / BoxJam: Very funny - but I'm sure 'Mina means a party where you sit in a lotus position, drinking wine out of boxes and talking about Kierkegaard...
/ BoxJamina: Party! Party!
/ Ms. BoxJam: No, I think she wants a pary where you invite someone you're interested in, and then invite every other woman you've ever dated! / BoxJam: Oh, I know - a party where we just complain that somone didn't get the last six molecules of butter out of the tub before throwing it out!
/ BoxJamina: Party?
/ Ms. BoxJam: Not now, 'Mina! A party where you let the grass grow until the city calls you to complain1 / BoxJamina: Party?
/ BoxJam: Hush, 'Mina - a party where you ignore that the yard was FLOODED...
/ Ms. BoxJam: A party where BITE ME... / [[The year is 2020, BoxJamina lies on a couch with a robot therapist]]
/ BoxJamina: ... and I have this irrational fear of social gatherings...
/ Robot Therapist: I... < http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000516.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Mullethead: NO, I'M MULLETHEAD / Ballethead: BALLETHEAD. SORRY. / BoxJam: MILLETHEAD?
/ Millethead: YO. / Mallethead: ANY TROUBLE FINDING ME?
/ BoxJam: FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK... http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000517.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Ms. BoxJam Spider: I'm still going to bite your head off. http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000518.html |
| BoxJam's Doodle Comics | Ms. BoxJam: You're thinking about doodles, aren't you? http://boxjamsdoodle.com/d/20000519.html |
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