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|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Future 'Mina: YOI YOI YOI / 'Mina: YOI YOI YOI|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: I told you I was deep.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics May 24, 2000||BoxJam: hmm... nigh'-nigh' books. What's your pleasure, 'Mina? Dr. Seuss? Shel Silverstein? Timonthy Leary? / Ms. BoxJam: I know you're joking, but I need to hear you say you know Leary didn't write kids' books! / BoxJam: Well of course not! Duh! / Ms. BoxJam: Thank you. / Later... / BoxJam: I hate my parents|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: ISN'T THIS EVEN MORE SPARTAN THAN USUAL? / Ms. BoxJam: IT'S FENG-SHUI.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: YOU HUNG THE MIRROR UPSIDE DOWN.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics May 27, 2000||[[Charlie Brown and BoxJam engage in several activities, in which BoxJam is more inept than Charlie Brown]] / [[Charlie Brown approaches Lucy]] / Charlie Brown: You think I'M a loser / Bonus: Second Lame Homage! / [[BoxJam, speaking to Charlie Brown in Halloween ghost outfit]] / BoxJam: I gotta rock, too...|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: The guy from the IRS called. / BoxJam: Omigosh! / Ms. BoxJam: Yeah, and the doctor called with your test results. / BoxJam: Oh no! It's bad, I know it's bad... / Ms. BoxJam: That's really disgusting.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[several shots whiz past a 'carnival shooting stand' where the ducks are BoxJam's]] / Ms. BoxJam: Aha! So you did stop for a beer last friday! / BoxJam: Lucky guess. Now I get to ask you thirty bazillion questions...|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: And that's why, to this day, pigs live in brick houses.
/ Little BoxJam: Bup, do you think we'll ever fly in space? / BoxJam: You and Me? Maybe. I'd love to fly in space with you. / <
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Little BoxJam: I don't wanna go to bed!
/ BoxJam: Be glad you can! Kids in Kolchakistan don't have bedtimes- it's always daylight! / Little BoxJam: Where?
/ BoxJam: Hop in, and we'll read Bippy the Bunny. / BoxJam: Bippy Bunny bought a belly full of Billy's barley. He-
/ Little BoxJam: Wait. / BoxJam: What?
/ Little BoxJam: How much is a belly full?
/ BoxJam: Enough to fill you. / <
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam head in a tube: I heard we're going. / Another BoxJam head in a tube: No way! Really! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: I don't wanna go! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: I do! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: I wonder what it's like out there... / Another BoxJam head in a tube: I heard you don't really get out - you just go into someone else... / Another BoxJam head in a tube: Is it true we carry the gift of life? / Another BoxJam head in a tube: Damn, you're cornball! Get over yourself! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: I think I feel something! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: We're committed! No turning back! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: We're going! / Another BoxJam head in a tube: We're going! / BoxJam: Oh, it's BLOOD. I'm giving blood. Get over it.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam is sitting reading a book, "Why They Hate You"]] / [[A flying saucer flies in]] / [[Its legs fold out]] / [[A light appears underneath the saucer]] / [[An alien comes out and speaks to BoxJam in alien script. Underneath is a translation.]] / Alien (translated): BoxJam's Doodle is the most popular cartoon on my planet, and in France. Its appeal is universal. I salute you! / [[The alien stands in the light underneath the saucer]] / [[The saucer zips away]] / BoxJam: What a deference a gray makes.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Headnote: Due to a processing glitch, the Terran BoxJam site originally posted this (Melnokki) version of the doodle on June 6. The next day, the correct version (at bottom) was correctly posted. A similar mixup occurred on the Melnokki Wide Web site. / [[BoxJam speaks to Ms. BoxJam in alien script, and she answers in alien script]] / [[BoxJam is shocked, and says something in alien script, as Ms. BoxJam's head explodes]] / [[BoxJam is now blackened and smoking. He and his wife still speak in alien script.]] / [[BoxJam's head explodes, and Ms. BoxJam's body is black and smoking, as, you guessed it, they continue to speak in alien script.]] / [[They are both now black smoking heaps. They speak in alien script. The comic is signed in alien script.]] / [[BoxJam is speaking to Ms. BoxJam]] / BoxJam: I feel funny. / Ms. BoxJam: Me too. Should we call the doctor? / [[BoxJam speaks, shocked, as Ms. BoxJam's head explodes]] / BoxJam: I did. She-OMIGOD! / [[BoxJam is now blackened and smoking; Ms. BoxJam is headless.]] / BoxJam: She said it's either mono or I'm pregnant. / Ms. BoxJam: And me? / [[BoxJam's head explodes. Ms. BoxJam's body is blackened and smoking.]] / BoxJam: Same thing. / Ms. BoxJam: This was really a doctor? / [[BoxJam and Ms. BoxJam are both now black smoking heaps.]] / BoxJam: OK, I called the infirmary at the college. / Ms. BoxJam: I figured.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: ...A bunch of gorillas tell Boxjam how great he is, and he says, "What a deference of great apes." / Ms. BoxJam: Hmm. When you say it out loud, I get it, but it might not be so obvious written / BoxJam: An alien tells Boxjam how great he is. "What a deference a gray makes." / Ms. BoxJam: Yeah, that's okay. / BoxJam: Harvey Feirstein tells Boxjam how great his is, and Boxjam says- / Ms. BoxJam: No.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: You don't use the things I say in your comic, do you? / BoxJam: No.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: So the Melnokki doodle was posted on the English site? / BoxJam: Yeah, and most people liked the Melnokki version better. / Ms. BoxJam: Before they knew what it meant? / BoxJam: Yeah. At least it wasn't the French version they liked. / Ms. BoxJam: French Version. / BoxJam: It's usually just a bunch of frames of me calling you "LAAA-DEEE!" / PS from Boxjam: Boxjam's doodle is happy to be in all languages (except Danish), since God loves everybody (except the Danish).|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: Today I will slice an orange! / Ms. BoxJam: Never before has someone attempted so little and failed so much.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam is dreaming]] / BoxJam: Ha ha / 'Mina: Tee hee / Ms. BoxJam: Hmm... / Little BoxJam: Look! / BoxJam: Ha ha ha / Ms. BoxJam: Mmff? / BoxJam: I had this weird dream that we were all barefoot! Ha ha. Of course it wasn't real- it was just a dream... / [[BoxJam sees he's barefoot]] / BoxJam: OMIGOSH!!!|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: ...AND THEY'RE SAYING THAT "BOXJAM' IS AN OBVIOUS PSEUDONYM. / Ms. BoxJam: GOOD LORD -- WHO DO they think IS WRITING THIS? / BoxJam: THE EARL OF OXFORD. / Ms. BoxJam: BAH! / BoxJam: THEY POINT OUT WHAT AN EXPERT BOXJAM IS IN RHETORIC, POINTS OF LAW, ALCHEMY, MELNOKKI CULTURE, MEDICINE, PENGUIN ANATOMY... / Ms. BoxJam: YOUR SCREW THAT ALL UP ROYALLY! / BoxJam: WELL, EXACTLY. / Ms. BoxJam: TO FLOG OR NOT TO FLOG...|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: Will you return this for me? I would but I'm busy. We've only had it for a year and I lost the receipt. / BoxJam: You're not setting me up, are you? / [[store that looks kind of like a chess board]] / BoxJam: I don't like the looks of this. [[returns]]|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam, wearing a Conquistador helmet, places a flag on a beach. A ship is docked nearby. The flag has alien script on it, and a translation: "I claim this unexplored land for the kingdom of BoxJam"]] / [[BoxJam scales a hill with the ship now far in the background]] / [[He sees a small plant]] / [[He bends down to look at the plant closely. A bug is walking on it.]] / [[The plant suddenly snaps shut on the bug.]] / << *SNAP!* >> / [[BoxJam looks up worriedly at the trees towering over him.]]|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam in Cauldron]] / BoxJam (thinking): The most humiliating thing is that she keeps telling everyone, "He's in a stew"...|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||<
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||... / .X. / ... / ... / .X. / O.. / X.. / .X. / O.. / X.. / .X. / O.O / [[Both O's now have eyes.]] / X.. / .X. / OXO / [[The upper left X has been turned into the bow in a picture of Ms. Boxjam. / A dog is in the upper middle. The middle center X has dots on either side / and a "V" mark on top, making it into a mathematical symbol, maybe, or a weird face. The lower right O now has a cap.]] / Little Boxjam: Now I see why mommy told me not to bother playing games with you. / Boxjam: Sorry.|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Sign: Big city .2 mi / Ms. BoxJam: Well, the guy can tow us in about eight minutes / BoxJam: Eight minutes?! That's great! Why don't you just kill us now?! / Ms. BoxJam: Well, you could call him back on the phone in this hotel... / BoxJam: Forget it. We're doomed. Doomed! / Ms. BoxJam: Oh, I'm sure we'll make it... / BoxJam: That sounded confident! Are you and the kids plotting behind my back? You're going to eat me, aren't you!? / Ms. BoxJam: Eat you? / BoxJam: That's it, isn't it? We're stranded; let's eat Dad!! / Ms. BoxJam (thinking): We really need to stop watching 'Survivor'...|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[A BoxJam wearing a beret and a 'Waldo' striped muumuu]] / Caption: Once there was a Frenchman who kept a pile of rocks. / Caption: They were nice rocks and the Frenchman felt a deep affection for them. / [[The BoxJam in a muumuu is joined by another, female, BoxJam]] / Caption: The young Frenchman fell in love with a beautiful maiden, who HATED the rocks. / Caption: She promised, however, that she would never make him get rid of anything important to him. / [[The maiden is shrugging to the BoxJam]] / Caption: Nevertheless, one day the pile of rocks was GONE. Nobody seemed to know what had happened. / [[Reveal: BoxJam is telling Little BoxJam a bedtime story - Ms. BoxJam has interrupted]] / Ms. BoxJam: Oh, good grief! It was just some comic books! / BoxJam: "It was just a pile of rocks!" she said. "Get over it!"|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam stands.]] / [[Boxjam moves a hugely foreshortened foot toward the reader.]] / BoxJam: That was my foot!|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||[[BoxJam sits, Ms. BoxJam reads.]] / [[BoxJam changes position.]] / BoxJam: Does she really sing "Kiss me, out by the bearded barley?"|
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||BoxJam: Wanna bring Mr. Bear up to bed?
/ Little BoxJam: Pfff - no! He's just a toy! / Ms. BoxJam: Aren't you putting Little BoxJam to bed?
/ BoxJam: Yeah - but I wanted to tell you he's growing up... / BoxJam: His toys are becoming unreal - he just said Mr. Bear is a toy...
/ Ms. BoxJam: That's sad... Mr. Bear is losing a friend... / BoxJam: Yeah, nothing's sadder for a toy than when a child outgrows is... / [[Little BoxJam pounds Mr. Bear with a hammer.]]
|BoxJam's Doodle Comics||Ms. BoxJam: Little BoxJam - watch your sister please - I have to clean up in the kitchen... / Little BoxJam: Grrrrr... / [[Little BoxJam stands next to 'Mina, furious. BoxJam sees them from the doorway.]] / Little BoxJam: I hate having to watch you! Parents don't know anything! Parents are so stupid! / [[BoxJam talks to Ms. BoxJam]] / BoxJam: He's on to us.|
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