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| GPF Archive: Thursday, August 18, 2005 | Dex: Welcome back, Fred!
/ Nick: How does it feel to be back in the office? / Fred: Pretty good. Although, to be honest, I don't know how long I'll be answering phones.
/ Ki: You're thinking of quitting? Don't you like it here? / Fred: Of course, especially now that Trent's gone! But the trial has made me a celebrity! I've had millions of hits on my website in the few days since the trial alone! / Nick: As long as you don't let it all go to your nucleus...
/ Fred: Don't worry. I'll mention you "little people" when I'm on Larry King... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050818.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, August 19, 2005 | Sharon: So Fred now has his own phone line?
/ Fooker: Yeah, and it's been ringing off the hook for days. Persephone's now his secretary. / Sharon: How is he taking his new-found celebrity?
/ Fooker: His ego can't fit in this state anymore. But once his 15 minutes are up, his fame will die off. / Sharon: So you don't think it will last?
/ Fooker: I dunno. Remember, he learned most of what he knows from the TV and the internet... / [[Fred is now shaped as a rectangular prism]]
/ Fred: So I have to keep reinventing myself, like Madonna. So in a few months, I'll be a cube all the time...
/ Persephone: Is it hip to be square? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050819.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, August 20, 2005 | Fred: This is the one and only Fred Physarum. you've got 30 seconds to hold my interest.
/ Voice on phone: I-is it really you? "Fred the Slime Mold?" / Fred: Yeah. Move it, Kid. I don't have all day.
/ Voice on phone: I'm so glad I finally found you! I've been searching for you for almost seven years! / Fred: Look, is this about a book deal or TV or radio appearance?
/ Voice on phone: Er... No...
/ Fred: Then call my agent. I'm busy, son. Scram.
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050820.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, August 21, 2005 | Sharon: Hey, Dex! How's the PHP for that shopping cart system coming?
/ Dex: Huh? Oh, it's almost done, Sharon. / Sharon: Why so glum?
/ Dex: Oh, nothing. You'll probably think I'm silly.
/ Sharon: Try me. / Dex: I've just felt... empty lately. As you know, I'm a huge "Star Trek" and "Star Wars" fan. But with "Enterprise" cancelled and "Episode III" ending the SW saga, I'm not sure what to look forward to anymore. / Dex: I mean, I've got all the shows and movies on DVD, so I can watch them any time I want. But they aren't NEW. And while there are plenty of great shows out now, they're just... not quite the same. / Sharon: Well, if you're not satisfied with what's currently out there, why don't you try writing something of your own design?
/ Dex: Hmmm... / {{Sharon gives the idea to Dex to write his own science fiction story. This becomes "Prometheus One".}} http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050821.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, August 22, 2005 | Dex: I know you two always have lunch plans, but can I borrow Ki just for today?
/ Nick: Sure. Just so long as you top off her tank when you're done. / [[Ki glares at Nick]]
/ Nick: What? / Ki: So what's up, Dex?
/ Dex: I wanted to ask your advice about something, and you're the only person I know who may be able to help me. / Dex: Can you give me a few tips on how to be a good writer?
/ [[Ki is shocked]] / {{Dex asks Ki for help in writing science fiction.}} http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050822.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, August 23, 2005 | Ki: What on earth makes you think I could teach you how to be a good writer?
/ Dex: Your "Counsel of Ethendale" novel was awesome! / Dex: Even IF I was cast as a stupid ogre...
/ Ki: I don't think one unfinished, unpublished novel makes me qualify as a seasoned author. / Dex: Even so, I think you're the only one of my friends I can talk to about this. Nick's comics were great, but I was thinking of trying something a bit more epic.
/ Ki: Like what? / Dex: Something set in a galaxy far, far away, where no man has gone before...
/ Ki: Sit down. We've got a lot to discuss. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050823.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, August 24, 2005 | Ki: Sharon told me about your Trek/Wars withdrawal. Am I to assume you were planning to write some fan fiction?
/ Dex: Actually, a crossover! Spock falls to the Sith and-- / Ki: Hold it right there. While there's nothing necessarily WRONG with fan fiction, a lot of that's been done. If you want to try to become a GOOD writer, I suggest you practice ALL aspects of creation. / Ki: Instead of playing in someone else's universe, why don't you try creating your own? Then you can set your own rules and define your own characters. In the long run, I think you'll find it a lot more rewarding. / Dex: No Wookie vs. Klingon battle sequences?
/ Ki: Actually, that sounds kinda neat... But my argument still stands. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050824.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, August 25, 2005 | Dex thinks: Hmm... Both Sharon and Ki challenged me to write something of my own design to overcome my Trek/Wars withdrawal. But WHAT to write? / Dex thinks: I've never written more than fan fiction before. And even those I've never shared with anyone. My hard drive is littered with old zip files of fanfics I've done over the years. / Dex thinks: Maybe I can draw on them for inspiration... Ya know, this character would work well on his own, and the situation in that file could work if I changed the Romulans to another alien race... / Dex thinks: It may start out as a patchwork quilt of fan fiction pieces, but I'll make it a tightly-woven tapestry of original Sci-Fi goodness! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050825.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, August 26, 2005 | [[Dex shows his completed "Prometheus One" story to Ki]]
/ Dex: Tada!
/ Ki: What's this?
/ Dex: My Sci-Fi short story!
/ Ki: Already? / Dex: Actually, I looked back at some of the fanfics I wrote and realized there was a lot of good ideas in them that could stand on their own! I think I could even expand it to a novel! / [[Ki looks over the story]] / Ki: Gee... Your female protagonist seems awfully familiar...
/ Dex: I borrowed from a writer I know and based the cast on people I know... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050826.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, August 27, 2005 | [[Shot of a bustling space station]]
/ Narrator: Prometheus One was meant to be mankind's first deep space outpost, a shining achievement of science and exploration. Instead, it was a dismal failure. / Narrator: Neglected during the Expansionist Wars and abandoned after the Kanorat Invasion, it became an island of vagrant humanity in a sea of hostile powers. / Narrator: The dilapidated station was held together only by the sheer determination of its de facto chief engineer, Kyoko Takahashi
/ [[Shows Kyoko, who looks exactly like Ki]] / Ki: Did you HAVE to spend so much time describing her form-fitting jumpsuit?
/ [[Dex sweating and embarrased]]
/ Dex: It... could use a LITTLE editing... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050827.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, August 28, 2005 | Narrator: Managed by the stern yet fair General Ducan, the station was caught in a power struggle between the humans and the greedy Eelorian magistrate, Trentoc T'Rel...
/ [[Shot of General Ducan who looks like Duncan in a uniform, and Trentoc who looks like Trent but with a blue face and weird winding nose]] / Narrator: Many factions vied for power here, from swashbuckling rogues like Jas Starbreaker and his copilot Shalar, to the human terrorists known only as the Brotherhood of the Double Helix...
/ [[Shot of Fooker as a rogue and Sharon with green face by his side, and Brotherhood of the Twisted Pair members in the background as the Brotherhood of the Double Helix]] / Narrator: Others tried merely to survive. Dr. Nichelle Duras administered frontier medicine while trying to raise her daughter, Cindy...
/ [[Shot of Nicole and Sydney as Nichelle and Cindy]] / Narrator: At the heart of the station, however, were the Falcons, the brave, elite pilots charged with defending the space lanes. Led by the gallant Capt. Ned Wellstone...
/ [[Shot of Nick in uniform as Ned, flanked by two nondescript officers, with jets taking off in the background]] / Ki: Wait a sec. You wrote this, and DIDN'T cast yourself as the dashing fighter pilot?
/ Dex: Oh, I'm IN there. You just haven't gotten to me yet. / Ki: I can't speak for the REST of your audience, but you've piqued MY interest now...
/ Dex: I THOUGHT that would grab your attention... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050828.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, August 29, 2005 | Ducan [Dwayne]: Ah, Takahashi. Are the fusion reactors back in sync with each other?
/ Kyoko [Ki]: #4 is held together with spit and bonding strips, but yeah. / Ducan [Dwayne]: Good. Your dear captain Wellstone is bringing us a present. I want you to take a look at it.
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Of course, general.
/ Trentoc [Trent]: Just one cycle! / Trentoc [Trent]: The item was uncovered in Eelorian space, General! By all rights, it should be handed over to us!
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: Actually, magistrate, it was recovered in UNCLAIMED space, near the Laxar nebula. / Ducan [Dwayne]: We humans have an old saying: Finders keepers.
/ Trentoc [Trent]: We shall see, general.
/ [[Shot of the "item", a strange spacecraft]] http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050829.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, August 30, 2005 | Kyoko [Ki]: Ned! I see you haven't gotten yourself killed!
/ Ned [Nick]: Nice to see you too. To think I went to all that trouble to bring you a present... / Kyoko [Ki]: So what exactly IS it?
/ Ned [Nick]: That's for YOU to tell US. It was floating derelict, without power of life signs by a nearby nebula. / Ned [Nick]: It obviously supported a crew, but it doesn't match any configuration in our or the Eelorian databases. It could be a warship, but I think it was an exploration vessel. I'm going to ask Starbreaker to discreetly ask around the non-humans. / Kyoko [Ki]: Otherwise, I just get to tinker around and find out how it works?
/ Ned [Nick]: The general kindly requests that you don't blow up the station as you do it. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050830.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, August 31, 2005 | [[Ki, as Takahashi, stands in the entrance to a strange space vessel.]]
/ Narrator: The vessel was small, especially by Eelorian standards, but still larger than most human ships. The interior was frigid from long exposure to naked space. / [[Ki looks in at the strange alien engine.]]
/ Narrator: The power source was unlike anything Takahashi had ever seen. Somehow, this race had harnassed the raw power of a quantum singularity--a black hole--for propulsion. However, the core had long ago been jettisoned. / [[Ki tightens an unseen bolt high above her head with a tool while watching to see if a display panel activates.]]
/ Narrator: Of course, Kyoko's ingenuity was never to be underestimated. Using a complex combination of converters and couplings, she siphoned power from the #6 fusion reactor to activate the ship's auxilary systems.
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050831.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, September 1, 2005 | [[A wide robot, vaguely like Dex, comes alive]]
/ Dexlar [Dex]: < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050901.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, September 2, 2005 | Kyoko [Ki]: You... speak Old Earth English?
/ Dexlar [Dex]: I was programmed with as many forms of verbal communication as my Masters thought I might encounter. / Dexlar [Dex]: Your species is human. Planet designation G8946-37NT4. Called by inhabitants as Earth, Terra, Sol 3...
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Y-yes. My name is Kyoko. Kyoko Takahashi. / Dexlar [Dex]: Greetings, Kyoko Kyoko Takahashi. Since you seem to designate verbal identifiers, you may address this unit as Dexlar 88-G, or simply Dexlar, as I am the only unit onboard. / Ki: "Dexlar?" You made yourself the ROBOT?
/ Dexter: Just wait! It gets better! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050902.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, September 3, 2005 | Kyoko [Ki]: Where are you from?
/ Dexlar [Dex]: This vessel is a deep space exploration craft from the galaxy you call Andromeda. / Dexlar [Dex]: While my Builders had the ability to "fold" space to observe other star systems, actual travel required more conventional means. Sadly, none of the biological crew survived the journey of several millenia. / Kyoko [Ki]: Um... Sorry to hear that.
/ Dexlar [Dex]: I have been without power for several centuries, ever since the crew jettisoned the core and died of asphyxiation. / Kyoko [Ki]: Well, I guess you didn't need to worry about not being fed...
/ Dexlar [Dex]: Perhaps you are in error. I am not fat. I am big-hulled. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050903.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, September 4, 2005 | [[Ned [Nick], Jas [Fooker], and Shalar [Sharon] talking]]
/ Jas [Fooker]: Your engineer girlfriend seems to be spending an awful lot of time with her new mechanical friend, Wellstone...
/ Shalar [Sharon]: Careful, Jas. You may make him jealous. / Ned [Nick]: Jealous? Hardly. Kyoko has a habit of getting caught up in her work sometimes. But I know my place with her.
/ Shalar [Sharon]: Poor dear. He's still going through denial. / [[Kyoko [Ki] enters]
/ Jas [Fooker]: Speak of the devil...
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Am I the topic of conversation?
/ Shalar [Sharon]: You and Ned's replacement. / Kyoko [Ki]: Dexlar may be a fascinating subject of study, but he's certainly no replacement for my captain.
/ Jas [Fooker]: What about the Eelorians? Do they still lay claim to that ship? / Ned [Nick]: The Eelorians lay claim to anything that doesn't fight back. And even then they may press on if they think they can win.
/ Shalar [Sharon]: It's a wonder they've let you play with that ship this long. / Jas [Fooker]: Mark my words, Takahashi. That ship and your mechanical pal are going to be trouble. If not now, then definitely later.
/ Ned [Nick]: You're such an optimist, Starbreaker. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050904.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, September 5, 2005 | [[Ned [Nick] and Kyoko [Ki] discussing]]
/ Kyoko [Ki]: So do YOU think I'm spending too much time with Dexlar?
/ Ned [Nick]: Well, you DID miss dinner last night... / Kyoko [Ki]: Sorry! I must have lost track of ti--
/ [[Ducan [Dwayne] enters]]
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: Security alert! Lock down all access ports! / Ned [Nick]: What's wrong, general?
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: We seem to have a hacker probing the system. Trace that signal! / Trentoc [Trent]: General! What is the meaning of this unauthorized access of our computer systems?
/ Worker: Sir! I've traced it to Hangar Bay 12!
/ Kyoko [Ki] thinks: Dexlar! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050905.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, September 6, 2005 | [[Kyoko [Ki] and Ned [Nick] running]]
/ Kyoko [Ki]: We have to get to Dexlar before the Eelorians storm the hangar bay! / Kyoko [Ki]: Dexlar! What are you doing?
/ Dexlar [Dex]: Have I done something wrong? I was merely curious about my new surroundings. / Kyoko [Ki]: You can't just break into a foreign system uninvited! Someone might view it as a form of attack!
/ Dexlar [Dex]: I did not mean any harm, nor have I actually caused any. / Ned [Nick]: Trust me, that's a matter of perspective.
/ [[Trentoc [Trent] arrives, brandishing a spear-like weapon]] http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050906.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, September 7, 2005 | [[Trentoc is attempting to take Dexlar from Kyoko]]
/ Trentoc: Because of this attack on our sovereignty, we demand that the robot and the alien ship be handed over to the Eelorian government immediately.
/ Kyoko: You can't do that! / Trentoc: On what grounds, Chief? You seem to forget that it was the abundant generosity of the Eelorians that let your people remain here after the Kanorat devastated your home world. Now you seek to harbor a criminal from us? / Kyoko: CRIMINAL? Dexlar is a ROBOT! An exploratory drone! He was doing what he was programmed to do! He knows nothing about our politics! He was only being inquisitive, seeking to learn more! You can't fault him for that! / Trentoc: I CAN fault it for gaining access to secured Eelorian military files. That is a crime by our law. And you are bound by our treaty to hand it over for punishment. Be grateful I do not ask for YOUR head as well, Chief. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050907.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, September 8, 2005 | [[Kyoko [Ki] in General Ducan's [Dwayne] office]]
/ Kyoko [Ki]: You're just going to hand Dexlar over to T'rel and his thugs?
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: My hands are tied, Kyoko. The Eelorian treaty has precedence here. / Kyoko [Ki]: You KNOW that T'rel only wants to use this as an excuse to seize Dex and take him apart! They just want to get their tentacles on that alien technology!
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: That may be true... / Ducan [Dwayne]: But so is the fact that this robot hacked OUR system, and through it, it hacked the Eelorians. I've checked the treaty and Eelorian code of law. T'rel's claim is legitimate. / Ducan [Dwayne]: Unless you can PROVE the robot didn't hack the Eelorian computer, there's not much else I can do. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050908.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, September 9, 2005 | Dexlar [Dex]: I apologize for causing so many problems, Kyoko Kyoko Takahashi...
/ Kyoko [Ki]: It's okay, Dexlar, you didn't know what you were doing was "wrong". / Dexlar [Dex]: As you said, I was programmed to explore. My data probe was designed to be non-invasive, but with such unfamiliar systems, it may have been misinterpreted as an attack. / Dexlar [Dex]: However, I was unaware that your computer was so deeply interwoven with the Eelorians...
/ Kyoko [Ki]: It's not. We only have read-only links, except for communications. / Dexlar [Dex]: Then perhaps the Eelorians are in error. I did not "hack" any system. I merely explored data pathways. If their system was unidirectional, I would not have attempted to access it.
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Is that so... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050909.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, September 10, 2005 | [[Kyoko typing at a computer]]
/ Kyoko [Ki] thinks: Dexlar says he didn't "hack" the Eelorian computer. And I'm inclined to believe him. But here's the log that shows the transfer from our computer to theirs. / Kyoko [Ki] thinks: That shouldn't be possible. Heck, I'VE tried to hack their system, without luck. Their encryption matrix makes system-level access almost impossible from our side. Then how... / Kyoko [Ki] thinks: What's this? I don't recognize this file. It looks like some sort of low-level subroutine. How did it get here? And what does it do? If I can step through the raw code... / Kyoko [Ki] thinks: That's it! The answer to our mystery, and maybe a few more! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050910.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, September 11, 2005 | Ducan [Dwayne]: I'm not happy about this, T'rel. I'm not convinced the robot meant any sort of malice against your computer.
/ Trentoc [Trent]: You humans are far too trusting. But the treaty is clear, and our courts will decide the robot's fate. / Ducan [Dwayne]: If you could give us a little more time to conduct a thorough investigation...
/ Trentoc [Trent]: I've had enough of your stalling, General! Release the machine to us now or--
/ [[Kyoko [Ki] enters]]
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Hold everything! / Trentoc [Trent]: What is the meaning of this interruption? General, discipline your subordinate!
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Discipline yourself, T'rel. I'm on to your little scheme. / Kyoko [Ki]: General, I have here a series of data logs that not only prove that Dexlar did NOT hack the Eelorian system, but that this was part of the Magistrate's elaborate plan to seize Dexlar's alien technology for himself. / Trentoc [Trent]: How DARE you accuise me of such subterfuge, Chief! I am appalled at the speed with which you fabricated this "evidence!"
/ Kyoko [Ki]: Nothing was fabricated, Magistrate. Your own computer can verify it. / Ducan [Dwayne]: At any rate, it appears Chief Takahashi has provided us with something to investigate. I'm sure this confiscation can wait until we review her "evidence". http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050911.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, September 12, 2005 | Kyoko [Ki]: Magistrate T'rel claims Dexlar's data probe gained system-level access to the Eelorian computers after compromising our own. This shouldn't be possible, as we only have read-only access to their knowledge base. / Kyoko [Ki]: Yet both our and their logs clearly show a system-level login at the very moment Dexlar was probing our system.
/ Trentoc [Trent]: Ha! You only prove my point! / Kyoko [Ki]: On the contrary, Dex was scanning our engineering database at the time of the Eelorian intrusion. There's no direct interface between that database and the Eelorian computer. We keep it separate for our OWN security. / Kyoko [Ki]: But Dex's sweep DID trigger a small piece of embedded code, deep in our system, that has been laying dormant for several years. I find it interesting that its timestamp corresponds with our first Eelorian computer link up. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050912.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, September 13, 2005 | Ned [Nick]: You're implying the Eelorians implanted a backdoor into our computer when they first established the link with us?
/ Trentoc [Trent]: Preposterous! / Kyoko [Ki]: Not implying; proving! I checked all system backups prior to and after the link, and it never existed before. The code executes a clever but harmless bypass of Eelorian security protocols. Enough to raise an alarm on cue. / Kyoko [Ki]: My suspicion is that they put this Trojan in our system as an ace in the hole, with no specific use in mind, but convenient in the off chance it might be needed. The magistrate knew of its existence, but I doubt few below his rank would. / Kyoko [Ki]: My guess is that he became frustrated by our legal salvage rights to the alien ship outside their space, and used the Trojan to simulate a hack when he learned of Dexlar's probe. Then he could cry foul and seize Dex and the ship. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050913.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, September 14, 2005 | Trentoc [Trent]: This is ludicrous! I demand that we end this charade and that you hand over the robot immediately!
/ Ducan [Dwayne]: I don't think so. Kyoko's evidence seems valid to me. / Ducan [Dwayne]: With no real intrusion by Dexlar into your computer, your criminal extradition claim has no merit. Thus, OUR salvage claim still holds, as enforced by the very treaty you religiously cling to, T'rel. / Trentoc [Trent]: My government will not stand for this treachery!
/ Ned [Nick]: On the contrary, I suspect they'll be so embarrassed by your mishandling of this that they'll backpedal quicker than a Rigellian razorback. / Ducan [Dwayne]: It wouldn't surprise me if they relieved you of your post, Magistrate.
/ Trentoc [Trent]: Laugh while you can, General. You'll live to regret this day... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050914.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, September 15, 2005 | Dexlar [Dex]: I apologize for causing you and your superiors so many problems, Kyoko.
/ Kyoko [Ki]: I'm sorry you got caught up in our politics, Dex. / Kyoko [Ki]: Your vessel has been repaired as best as I can do it. But without a power core, you won't get far, and we can't exactly harness a black hole for you. / Dexlar [Dex]: The voyage home would be long and... lonely. My creators most likely already assumed our ship was lost. Besides, I was sent to meet and observe new cultures that I encounter... / Dexlar [Dex]: I suspect there is much here I can yet observe...
/ Kyoko [Ki]: You're welcome to stay, Dexlar. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050915.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, September 16, 2005 | [[Ki finishes reading Dex's story, "Prometheus One".]]
/ Dex: Well? What did you think? Is it okay?
/ Ki: I think it's pretty good, Dex. / Ki: The plot works, although you could have foreshadowed the twist better. Maybe add a little to the pre-Dexlar bit to build tension. The descriptions are pretty vivid. / Ki: You can tell that the characters are well developed in your head. It will be interesting to see what you can do with them when you write more about them. / Dex: So... you think I should write more?
/ Ki: Part of me wonders if encouraging you is a good thing, but yes. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050916.html |
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