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Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley holds up a dove in a full-page image.]] / Dove: 2004 / Text: The new Scary Go Round Jan 5 2004
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Title page. Shelley is holding a dove over her head. Text at the bottom reads: The New Scary Go Round Jan 5 2004]] / Dove: 2004
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Panel 1: / SFX: Clatter, Crash, Dink / / Panel 2: / Amy: Shelley, is Fallon fighting ninjas again? / Shelley: It is the third night in a row. Sneak attacks are making me crabby. / / Panel 3: / Amy: At least she isn't beating them with someone's torn off leg tonight. / Shelley: Let's go cower and whimper in the laundry room. I have Forest Creatures Top Trumps and Uno.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is sitting up in bed looking worried]] / <> / <> / <> / [[Amy and Shelley are in bathrobes, looking down over the stair railing]] / Amy: Shelley, is Fallon fighting ninjas again? / Shelley: It is the third night in a row. Sneak attacks are making me crabby. / [[Amy and Shelley are watching as Fallon beats up some ninjas]] / Amy: At least she isn't beating them with someone's torn off leg tonight. / Shelley: Lets go cower and whimper in the laundry room. / Shelley: I have Forest Creatures Top Trumps and Uno.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Fallon is holding two cups of coffee; behind her, three shurikens are nailed deep in the wall]] / Fallon: I'm sorry Shelley. I didn't realize when I demolished the shed that I was opening up a doorway to ancient feudal Japan. / [[Fallon and Shelley are sitting at a table]] / Shelley: Fallon, you're my nicest friend. I do not want to let ninjas come between us. / Shelley: So I am moving out. / [[Shelley is standing]] / Shelley: Tackleford is too scary for someone like me. People are always being murderified and killed up bad. / Fallon: Oh, Shelley! / [[Shelley is drinking from her cup]] / Shelley: I'm moving to Top Mareswich. The greatest danger there is a runaway demon-possessed tractor. / Shelley: The estate agent assures me this basically almost never happens.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Fallon is holding two pink teacups. There are three ninja stars stuck in the wall behind her, and the window curtain is askew]] / Fallon: I'm sorry Shelley. I didn't realise when I demolished the shed that I was opening up a doorway to ancient feudal Japan. / [[Fallon and Shelley are sitting at a table]] / Shelley: Fallon, you're my nicest friend. i do not want to let ninjas come between us. / Shelley: So I am moving out. / [[Shelley is standing up, and Fallon is leaning backwards over her chair]] / Shelley: Tackleford is too scary for someone like me. People are always being murderified and killed up bad. / Fallon: Oh, Shelley! / [[Shelley is standing in the doorway drinking from her pink teacup. Two ninjas are sitting dejectedly outside]] / Shelley: I'm moving to Mareswich. The greatest danger there is a runaway demon-possessed tractor. / Shelley: The estate agent assures me this basically almost never happens.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Amy, if you are going to live with me in the new house, you will have to pay rent. You cannot freeload like you do with Fallon. / Amy Chilton: I enriched this place with my fragrant loveliness! / Shelley Winters: No. You stank it out with your feet. Which is similar. But not the same. / Shelley Winters: That list has some very reasonable house rules which I am sure you will not mind. / List: 1. No nuts after 10.30 at night (exc. pistachio) 2. No mildew. 3. No singing/whistling out of tune. 4. Respect for royal family + landed gentry AT ALL TIMES.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Amy and Shelley are holding boxes]] / Shelley: Amy, if you are going to live with me in the new house, you will have to pay rent. You cannot freeload like you do with Fallon. / Amy: I enriched this place with my fragrant loveliness! / Shelley: No. You stank it out with your feet. Which is similar. But not the same. / [[Shelley is loading stuff into the back of the car while Amy examines a piece of paper]] / Shelley: That list has some very reasonable house rules which I am sure you will not mind. / List: 1. No nuts after 10.30 at night (exc. pistachio) / 2. No mildew / 3. No singing/whistling out of tune / 4. Respect for royal family + landed gentry AT ALL TIMES
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley: Huzzah! We are here at last! / Amy: Yes. That arduous 20 minute journey that we will never forget, so long as we live. That epoch-making incident with the C-Road, the passing-place and the Volvo Estate. The humanity. / Shelley: Listen, so-called friend, there is no need to be sarcastic! This is a good place! I saw a pub called the Lark's Arms! / Amy: How can a lark have arms? / Shelley: The countryside is the cradle of evolution, Ames! You may see an educated pig taking tea with the vicar! That is nature being awesome.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley and Amy are standing out front of a house]] / Shelley: Huzzah! We are here at last! / Amy: Yes. That arduous 20 minute journey that we will never forget, so long as we live. / Amy: That epoch-making incident with the C-road, the passing-place and the Volvo Estate. / Amy: The humanity. / [[Amy is helping Shelley unload boxes from the car]] / Shelley: Listen, so-called friend, there is no need to be sarcastic! This is a good place! I saw a pub called the Lark's Arms! / Amy: How can a lark have arms? / [[Amy and Shelley are carrying boxes. Amy's is marked "Fun Things (a-f)"]] / Shelley: the countryside is the cradle of evolution, Ames! You may see an educated pig taking tea with the Vicar! / Shelley: That is nature being awesome.
 
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Amy lounges on the couch. Shelley talks to her through the window.]] / Shelley: Gues what I have bought!! / Amy: A Newspaper. / [[Shelly presents two chickens.]] / Shelley: No, Chickens! We can have a little egg for breakfast every day. / Amy: Like Rocky? / [[Outdoors. Amy observes chicken and coop skeptically.]] / Amy: I don't know if I can eat an egg when I can see the chicken it came out of. / Shelly: Do not feel ashamed for the broody hen. / Amy: It seems wrong
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Amy is lying on the couch while Shelley talks to her through the window]] / Shelley: Amy, guess what I have bought!! / Amy: A newspaper. / [[Shelley is holding up two birdcages, each containing a chicken.]] / Shelley: No, chickens! We can have a little egg for breakfast every day. / Amy: Like Rocky? / [[One of the chickens is walking up a ramp into a chicken coop. Amy and Shelley are watching.]] / Chicken: <> / Amy: I don't know if I can eat an egg when I can see the chicken it came out of. / Amy: It seems wrong. / Shelley: Do not feel ashamed for the broody hen. / Shelley: You should be applying that shame to the many areas of your life that require it.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: What are you going to do today, Amy? / Amy Chilton: Can I have a lift? I'm going to beg the art school to let me back in. / Amy Chilton: The drudgery of my Christmas job crushed my fragile spirit. Education will stave off my descent into madness for another few years. / Shelley Winters: Work can be fun! I love working in the Mayor's office. / Amy Chilton: Well, I suppose brain surgeons wouldn't mess about in brain goo if they didn't like it. / Shelley Winters: I think the goo is secondary to making a sickly child smile... / Amy Chilton: All the doctor sees is a giant, smiling gooey brain.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is reading a newspaper while Amy eats an egg]] / Shelley: What are you going to do today Amy? / Amy: Can I have a lift? I'm going to beg the Art School to let me back in. / [[Amy is holding up a sweater/coat]] / Amy: The drudgery of my Christmas job crushed my fragile spirit. / Amy: Education will stave off my descent into madness for another few years. / [[Shelley appears to be making her lunch]] / Shelley: Work can be fun! I love working in the Mayor's office. / Amy: Well, I suppose brain surgeons wouldn't mess about in brain goo if they didn't like it. / [[Shelley and Amy are walking to the car]] / Shelley: I think the goo is secondary to making a sickly child smile... / Amy: All the doctor sees is a giant, smiling gooey brain.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Mayor: Shelley, did you arrange the visit from our twin town in Mauritania this week? / Shelley: No, Mr Mayor, I organised a visit from our twin town in Robotania, as you asked last month. / Mayor: Robotania? I very clearly said Mauritania. / Shelley: Far be it from me to question your mayoral authority, but if you make requests with your pipe in your mouth, they are sometimes garbled. / Mayor [[with pipe in mouth]]: Nonfenf! / Mayor: Ah, not to worry. It's not as if Robotania is a country populated entirely by robots. A-ha ha. / Shelley: We're now twinned with the capital, Mechacropolis XF-1. Donut?
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[The mayor has a pipe in his mouth and is looking at a book. Shelley is sitting at a desk using a laptop]] / Mayor: Shelley, did you arrange the visit from our twin town in Mauritania this week? / Shelley: No, Mr. Mayor, I organised a visit from our twin town in Robotania, as you asked last month. / Mayor: Robotania? I very clearly said Mauritania. / [[The mayor still has the pipe in his mouth. Shelley is standing at a filing cabinet.]] / Shelley: Far be it from me to question your mayoral authority, but if you make requests with your pipe in your mouth, they are sometimes garbled. / Mayor: Nonfenf! / [[The mayor is holding his pipe. Shelley is offering him a box of donuts, and looking worried]] / Mayor: Ah, not to worry. It's not as if Robotania is a country populated entirely by robots. A-ha ha. / Shelley: We're now twinned with the capital, Mechacropolis XF-1. Donut?
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Mayor: Shelley, what can you tell us about Robotania? Who is it, where, and why? / Shelley: When the Soviet Union dissolved, the robots built during their Cold War campaign were given their own small country in the Khrebet Cherskogo. Think of it as a robot mountain kingdom of doom, if that helps. / Mayor: And this is where those robots live in peace and happiness? / Shelley: If by that you mean "brutal hardline mechanical communism", then yes! / Shelley: You don't look very happy, Mr Mayor. / Mayor: That is because when I close my eyes, all I can see is flame. And skeletons. And skeletons on fire.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Mayor: Shelley, what can you tell us about Robotania? Who is it, where, and why? / Shelley: When the Soviet Union dissolved, the robots built during their Cold War campaign were given their own small country in the Khrebet Cherskogo. Think of it as a Robot Mountain Kingdom of Doom, if that helps. / [[Powerpoint presentation: Robotania, Popn. 51,000 Main Export: Dismay]] / Mayor: And this is where those robots live in peace and happiness? / Shelley: If by that you mean "Brutal hardline mechanical communism," then yes! / Shelley: You don't look very happy, Mr. Mayor. / Mayor: That is because when I close my eyes, all I can see is flame. And skeletons. And skeletons on fire.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Fallon, Shelley, and Amy are at a bar.]] Fallon: Shelley, you look terrible! / Shelley: I had a really really bad day at work. I accidentally arranged a visit to the town for a party of Cold War killing machines from the former USSR. / Amy: You think that's bad? I had to totally grovel with my professor to get back on my art course. It was so demeaning. / Fallon: Death robots, Ames, designed to obliterate the west. / Amy: God knows what people who weren't born as fabulous eye candy do.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Fallon, Shelley, and Amy are sitting in a restaurant drinking wine. Two men are standing off to the side]] / Fallon: Shelley, you look terrible! / Shelley: I had a really bad day at work. / Shelley: I accidently arranged a visit to the town for a party of Cold War killing machines from the former USSR. / [[Amy pours more wine into her own glass. She has one hand dramatically in the air]] / Amy: You think that's bad? I had to totally grovel with my professor to get back on my art course. It was so demeaning. / Fallon: Death robots, Ames, designed to obliterate the west. / Amy: God knows what people who weren't born as fabulous eye candy do.
 
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[A large Robotanian aeroplane comes into land.]] / <> / Shelley Winters: That's a very big aeroplane, Mr. Mayor. / Mayor James Mayor: The Robotanians' customs may be very different from ours, but we have to offer them the hand of friendship. That's the great British way! / Shelley Winters: Does ploughing your giant robot plane through residential streets while landing count as a "very different custom"? It seems sort of different.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[A large aeroplane is in the sky]] / <> / [[Shelley and the Mayor are standing at a window]] / Shelley: That's a very big aeroplane, Mr. Mayor. / Mayor: The Robotanians' customs may be very different from ours, but we have to offer them the hand of friendship. / Mayor:That's the great British way! / [[The mayor and Shelley watch as the aeroplane plows through part of the city]] / Shelley: Does ploughing your giant robot plane through residential streets while landing count as a "very different custom"? / Shelley: It seems sort of different.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Fallon omigod omigod the Robotanians just landed and we're having an international incident! / Fallon Young: Already? / Fallon Young: They've only just touched the ground? You're even better at this than me. / Shelley Winters: I need practical advice, not cheeky commentary! / Fallon Young: Okay, listen carefully: whatever happens, just power through regardless. Ignore the big picture and concentrate on the fine details. / Fallon Young: If that doesn't work for you, I have a colleague who swears by hiding in the crypt of a local church... Remember to take sammiches!
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is standing at a window pulling her hair and talking on the phone. Explosions can be seen outside]] / Shelley: Fallon omigod omigod the Robotanians just landed and we're having an international incident! / Fallon (over the phone): Already? / [[Fallon is on the phone in her home]] / Fallon: They've only just touched the ground? You're even better at this than me. / Shelley (over the phone): I need practical advice, not cheeky commentary! / Fallon: Okay, listen carefully: whatever happens, just power through regardless. Ignore the big picture and concentrate on the fine details. / [[Shelly is glaring at her phone]] / Fallon (over the phone): If that doesn't work for you, I have a colleague who swears by hiding in the crypt of a local church... / Fallon (over the phone): Remember to take sammiches!
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Robotanian: +++ greetings citizens of Tackleford from Robotic People's Republic of Robotania +++ +++Your runway requires extension by 2100m +++ +++To be less feeble and carbon based +++ / Fallon Young: Do you know what I see when I watch this, Shelley? A brave girl. You were a very, very brave girl. / Shelley Winters: There are another six days of robot visit. Soon they will tire of me. That's when I will be squashed flat as an object lesson to feeble kitten lovers everywhere. / Fallon Young: This will be the making of you, chicken. / Shelley Winters: The making sticky and unrecognisable of me.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley and Fallon are watching Shelley and the Mayor greeting the Robotanians on TV]] / Robotanian (on TV): +++ greetings citizens of Tackleford from Robotic People's Republic of Robotania +++ / Robotanian (on TV): +++ Your runway requires extension by 2100m +++ / Robotanian (on TV): +++ To be less feeble and carbon based +++ / Fallon: Do you know what I see when I watch this Shelley? A brave girl. You were a very, very brave girl. / Shelley: There are another six days of robot visit. Soon they will tire of me. / Shelley: That's when I will be squashed flat as an object lesson to feeble kitten lovers everywhere. / Fallon: This will be the making of you, chicken. / Shelley: The making of a sticky and unrecognisable me.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Mr. Mayor! You cannot hide in your office all day. / Mayor James Mayor: I can't face the soulless automatons, Shelley. / Mayor James Mayor: They wouldn't fit into the hotel you booked them into, so I sent them to the bus terminal. It was the only thing I could think of to do! / Shelley Winters: You spent foreign dignitaries. To spend the night in a draughty shed. With some old buses. / Mayor James Mayor: If you want a competition to see who is best at rezoning aqueducts, prepare to be whipped little lady. When it comes to choosing accomodation for hell machines, I'd be grateful for a little slack.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is forcing her way into the Mayor's office. The Mayor is tring t o block the door]] / Shelley: Mr. Mayor! You cannot hide in your office all day. / Mayor: I can't face the soulless automatons, Shelley. / [[Shelley is in the office and the Mayor is sitting on the floor]] / Mayor: They wouldn't fit into the hotel you booked them, so I sent them to the bus terminal. / Mayor: It was the only thing I could think of to do! / Shelley: You sent foreign dignitaries to spend the night in a draughty shed. With some old buses. / Mayor: If you want a competition to see who is best at rezoning aqueducts, prepare to be whipped little lady. / Mayor: When it comes to choosing accomodation for hell machines, I'd be grateful for a little slack.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Sorry about your night in the bus terminal / Green Robotanian: +++ is fine. rivals best bordellos in mechacropolis 4. +++ / Shelley Winters: I b-b-b- beg your pardon? / Green Robotanian: +++ entire Robotanian dignitary corps have 'good time' on 784 to Coward Cross +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ HA! +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ tackleford women unreponsive but handsome! +++ / Olive Robotanian: +++is inappropriate subject material for both diplomacy and female human ears +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ Women of Robotania smell of old diesel, also rarely serviced +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ lack streamlined design and 'top deck' +++ / Shelley Winters: Oh DEAR.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is talking to the green Robotanian dignitary at the bus terminal]] / Shelley: Sorry about your night in the bus terminal. / Green Robotanian: +++ is fine, rivals best bordellos in mechacropolis 4. +++ / [[Shelley is talking to the green and yellow Robotanians]] / Shelley: I b-b-b-beg your pardon? / Green Robotanian: +++ entire Robotanian dignitary corps have 'good time' on 784 to Coward Cross +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ HA! +++ / [[A brown Robotanian joins the group]] / Yellow Robotanian: +++ tackleford women unresponsive but handsome! +++ / Brown Robotanian: +++ is inappropriate subject material for both diplomacy and female human ears +++ / Shelley: Oh dear. / Green Robotanian: +++ Women of Robotania smell of old diesel, also rarely serviced +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ lack streamlined design and 'top deck' +++
 
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Amy: Hugo, Shelley has invented a new word. "Busfucker!" / Shelley: I did not invent it. I wrote it down in order to get it out of my brain / Hugo: Yo, I am horrified inside my soul. Where is the dainty princess I recall from previous times of our acquaintance?. / Shelley: I cannot take looking after the Robotanians much longer. It's hard to impose your will on foreign robots who want to get it on with machines. / Amy: Rutting a few parked Fiats has got to be better than declaring war on the human race and- / Shelley: Shhhh! / Shelley's cellphone: ***provide please location of forward thinking construction firm***
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Amy and Shelley are sitting at a table drinking wine. Hugo is seated at a table next to theirs.]] / Amy: Hugo, Shelley has invented a new word. "Bus****er!" / Shelley: I did not invent it. I wrote it down in order to get it out of my brain. / Hugo: Yo, I am horrified inside my soul. Where is the dainty princess I recall from previous times of our acquaintance? / Shelley: I cannot take looking after the Robotanians for much longer. It's hard to impose your will on foreign robots who want to get it on with machines. / Shelley's cell phone: <> / [[Amy is filing her nails while Shelley picks up the phone]] / Amy: Rutting a few parked Fiats has got to be better than declaring war on the human race and- / Shelley (interrupting): Shhhh! / Robotanian Dignitary (over phone): +++ provide please location of forward thinking construction firm +++
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley: Ames, I had a dire and desperate dream! / Amy: Make me a little egg and tell me about it. / Shelley: We moved to the country, and then I invited a party of appalling robots to visit from a foreign land! / Amy: Haha! That's funny! / Amy: You see, Shelley, those are precisely the events of the past few weeks. / Shelley: Reality is a pie of which I do not require another slice. / Shelley: Later in the dream I solved all the problems by singing sweetly. The song concerned a cheeky corncob who loved chocolate.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Ames, I had a dire and desperate dream! / Amy Chilton: Make me a little egg and tell me about it. / Shelley Winters: We moved to the country, and then I invited a party of appalling robots to visit from a foreign land! / Amy Chilton: Haha! That's funny! / Amy Chilton: You see, Shelley, those are precisely the events of the past few weeks. / Shelley Winters: Reality is a pie of which I do not require another slice. / Shelley Winters: Later in the dream I solved all the problems by singing sweetly. THe song concerned a cheeky corncob who loved chocolate.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Outside the Tackleford Bus Terminals]] / <> / Robotanian [[out of panel]]: +++ someone always playing the corporation games +++ / Other Robotanian [[out of panel]]: +++ why is it that they are always changing of the corporation names +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ we built this city, we built this city on proletarian toil! +++ +++woah-oh +++ / Shelley Winters: G-g-good morning Robotanians... / Shelley Winters: I'm very glad that my brain can't actually process what it's seeing. / Yellow Robotanian: +++ carbon unit shelley, please meeting our special new friends, the Hotpoint Sisters +++ +++ supreme expertise in sensual massage! +++ / Olive Robotanian: +++ also willing listeners to struggles of Robo-Trotsky+++
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is standing outside the Tackleford bus terminal]] / <> / Robotanian voice 1 (from inside the terminal): +++ someone always playing the corporation games +++ / Robotanian voice 2 (from inside the terminal): +++ why is it that they are always changing of the corporation names +++ / [[Shelley is inside the terminal with the Robotanian dignitaries]] / Green Robotanian: +++ we built this city, we built this city on proletarian toil! +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ woah-oh! +++ / Shelley: G-g-good morning Robotanians... / [[The yellow and brown Robotanians are sitting in front of a "Robotche Guevara" poster, in the company of two washing machines. The yellow Robotanian is sporting a green, yellow, red, and black striped cap, and the brown Robotanian has a "Fu Manchu" style mustache.]] / Shelley: I'm very glad that my brain can't actually process what it's seeing. / Yellow Robotanian: +++ carbon unit Shelley, please meeting our special new friends, the Hotpoint Sisters +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ supreme expertise in sensual massage! +++ / Brown Robotanian: +++ also willing listeners to struggles of Robo-Trotsky +++
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Three hours, Mr. Mayor. Three hours and we're through this robot nightmare. / Mayor James Mayor: Call it acceptance, or growing, or just plain old heavy sedation, but I feel okay about this! / Shelley Winters: You're drooling. / Mayor James Mayor: The Doc fixed me up, Shelley. The great thing is, the more I take, the better I feel. / Shelley Winters: Who are you looking at, Mr. Mayor? Mr. Mayor? / Elephant-headed Hallucination: It is almost impossible for me to tell you just how cool everything is going to be right now.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[At the airport (Gate K67-1)]] / Shelley Winters: Three hours, Mr Mayor. Three hours and we're through this robot nightmare. / Mayor James Mayor: Call it acceptance, or growing, or just plain old heavy sedation, but I feel okay about this! / Shelley Winters: You're drooling. / [[Mayor James Mayor is now hallucinating himself with an elephants head. They are making thumbs up signs at each other]] / Mayor James Mayor: The doc fixed me up, Shelley. The great thing is, the more I take, the better I feel. / Shelley Winters: Who are you looking at, Mr Mayor? Mr Mayor? / Elephant-headed Hallucination: It is almost impossible for me to tell you just how cool everything is going to be right now.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison <> / [[Shelley is writing on the airport restroom walls. The text reads: call 07283-78762. ask 4 rachel 4 french + swedish.]] / [[Tim Jones' drink-dispensing robot enters.]] / Shelley Winters: What are you doing here, skulking in the airport ladies toilet? You should be at the town hall, dispensing drinks! Are you a secret pervert? / Shelley Winters: No, of course you aren't are you? You just want to say goodbye to the Robotanians. Come on then, come with me to the gate. / Shelley Winters: Maybe you can be penpals! Swapping tales of indentured servitude for stories about vile automated debauchery. Or, you know, mix CDs.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is writing a message in pen on a bathroom wall over a hand dryer. A robot arm is reaching toward her from the left.]] / Message Text: "Call 07823-78762 Ask 4 (obscured by pen) 4 French (obscured) Swedish. han" / <> / [[Shelley is standing in the bathroom with Tim's drink vending machine]] / Shelley: What are you doing here, skulking in the airport ladies toilet? You should be at the town hall, dispensing drinks! / Shelley: Are you a secret pervert? / Shelley: No, of course you aren't are you? You just want to say goodbye to the Robotanians. Come one the, come with me to the gate. / Shelley: Maybe you can be penpals! Swapping tales of indentured servitude for stories about vile automated debauchery. / Shelley: Or, you know, mix CDs.
 
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Robots, you are here at last! There is someone who works at town hall who would like to meet you! / Olive Robotanian: +++ what is THIS? +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ is scarcely robot at all +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ i have rust on underside better qualifying as artificial intelligence +++ / Olive Robotanian: +++ the strong shall live, the weak shall fall! +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ ROBOTANIA! ROBOTANIA! +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ give me head! is pot for plant! +++ / Shelley Winters: Mr. Mayor, I was always sure that things happened for a reason, but this ti- / Mayor James Mayor: Bri-ight eyes, burnin' like fi-re, bright eyes, why do you close and fade...
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley and the drink dispenser robot are at the Gate from which the Robotanians are leaving]] / Shelley: Robots, you are here at last! There is someone who works at town hall who would like to meet you! / [[The Robotanians are surrounding the drink dispensing robot]] / Yellow Robotanian: +++ is scarcely robot at all +++ / Brown Robotanian: +++ what is THIS? +++ / Brown Robotanian: +++ i have rust on my underside better qualifying as artificial intelligence +++ / [[The Robotanians attack and start dismantling the drink dispenser robot. Shelley is talking to the mayor.]] / Brown Robotanian: +++ the strong shall live, the weak shall fall! +++ / Yellow Robotanian: +++ ROBOTANIA! ROBOTANIA! +++ / Green Robotanian: +++ give me head! is pot for plant! +++ / Shelley: Mr. Mayor, I was always sure that things happened for a reason, but this ti- / Mayor (interrupting with a song): Bri-ight eyes, burnin' like fi-re, bright eyes, why do you close and fade...
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley: Poor robot . . . sniff . . . he just wanted a friend. / Amy: I helped build him. Maybe I can do something. / Amy: I've got to caution you that 95% of his body parts are missing. / Shelley: Cheeky little corncob with a glint in his eye, he just wants choc-o-late, he don't want pie. / Shelley: If you offer him a pea he don't want (sniff) that, he only likes things made of co-coa fat. / Amy: Shel, you should enter the lame olympics. / Shelley: My main event would be "drawing a picture of a pathetic, wobbly looking duck". Or maybe "laughing at inappropriate times in a thin, high voice".
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Shelley is sitting at a table with Amy. Shelley is holding the head of the late drink dispenser robot]] / Shelley: Poor robot... sniff... He just wanted a friend. / Amy: I helped build him, maybe I can do something. / Amy: I've got to caution you that 95% of his body parts are missing. / Shelley (singing): Cheeky little corncob with a glint in his eye, he just wants choc-o-late, he don't want pie. / [[Shelley and Amy are stirring and checking pots on the stove]] / Shelley (still singing): If you offer him a pea he don't want (sniff) that, he only likes things made of co-coa fat. / Amy: Shel, you should enter the Lame Olympics. / [[Shelley is tasting the stirring spoon]] / My main event would be "drawing a picture of a pathetic, wobbly looking duck". / Shelley: Or maybe "laughing at inappropriate times in a thin, high voice".
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Amy: Well Shelley, I couldn't fix the robot. It turns out I have no actual knowledge of robotics. / Shelley: We'll have to take it back to Tim to fix. / Amy: Tim's weird now. He's changed. / Shelley: He sent me a christmas card! / Amy: Shelley, that was a blueprint labelled "(In no way a) Doomseday device- keep this somewhere safe for me" / Shelley: "...and a happy new year!" / Amy: A horse wearing a bowler hat is not necessarily a stockbroker. / Shelley: Like you'd know.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison [[Amy is holding the head of the drink dispenser robot and talking to Shelley]] / Amy: Well Shelley, I couldn't fix the robot. It turns out I have no actual knowledge of robotics. / Shelley: We'll have to take it back to Tim to fix. / Amy: Tim's weird now. He's changed. / Shelley: He sent me a Christmas card! / [[Amy has her hands on Shelley's shoulders and is looking at her with concern]] / Amy: Shel, that was a bluprint labelled "(in no way a) Doomsday Device - keep this somewhere safe for me" / Shelley: "...and a happy new year!" / Amy: A horse wearing a bowler hat is not necessarily a stockbroker. / Shelley: Like you'd know.
Scary Go Round 20040203 Shelley: Oh her face is pretty and her ass is big, she looks like a model but she smells like a a pig... / Amy: Skating... ice... so thin... / Shelley: I am only kidding. You smell like a posey! / Amy: Why do you always accuse people of being "stinky"? / Shelley: It's my natural defence. Like a bee's sting. I am like a bee. / {{natural defense}} / Amy: I wish it was exactly like a bee's sting. / Amy: In that you would die painfully immediately after doing it. / Shelley: Oh, excuse me, I didn't realise you were wearing the sassypants today. / {{realize}}
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Why are we visiting Tim, Amy? Remind me please. / Amy Chilton: We should mend some bridges this year, Shel. If Tim's gone mad maybe we can ground him. With, you know, our down to earth worldview. / Shelley Winters: Last time we saw him he was bald, with an eyepatch, shouting in a wheelchair. He shouted at me! / Amy Chilton: Just shout back at him. Call him a freak and wave your arms about. / Shelley Winters: What... what if he's replaced both hands with hooks? / Amy Chilton: I don't know Shelley. I think at that point you can upgrade from "shout" to "shriek".
 
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Tim: Come through. What a surprise! / Shelley: Keep a safe distance, Ames. Those "hands" could be rubber hook-cosies. / Tim: It's very nice to see you two. I didn't really expect to hear from anyone after Hallowe'en. / Shelley: You were frightful! / Tim: After I got the pox I became increasingly irritable, bald and unpleasant to be around. / Memory of Poxed Tim: Butter Pie! / Tim: Gripped by delusion and feverish hallucinations, I staggered toward madness. / Amy: How did you get better? / Tim: I went to the doctor and got some antibiotics. It cleared up within a week. / Tim: It's kind of an admission of failure for a man to go and see a physician. He wants to fight disease on his own manly terms. / Amy: A woman is smart enough to know you can't do that. / Shelley: You can't punch a microbe in the jaw. Its face is invisible to the naked eye.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Tim: Come through. What a surprise! / Shelley: Keep a safe distance, Ames. Those "hands" could be rubber hook-cosies. / Tim: It's very nice to see you two. I didn't really expect to hear from anyone after Hallowe'en. / Shelley: You were frightful! / Tim: After I got the pox I became increasingly irritable, bald and unpleasant to be around. / Tim: Gripped by delusion and feverish hallucinations, I staggered toward madness. / Amy: How did you get better? / Tim: I went to the doctor and got some antibiotics. It cleared up within a week. / Tim: It's kind of an admission of failure for a man to go and see a physician. / Tim: He wants to fight disease on his own manly terms. / Amy: A woman is smart enough to know you can't do that. / Shelley: You can't punch a microbe in the jaw. Its face is invisible to the naked eye.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Amy Chilton: We were wondering if you could fix that robot you built. / Tim Jones: Wh-wh- what happened here? / Shelley Winters: There was an outbreak of sadness. / Tim Jones: This was months of work! MONTHS! / Amy Chilton: Okay we have to go now! Bye! Lots of love! / Shelley Winters: We made him angry. We aren't very good friends at all. / Amy Chilton: Irrational, irresponsible rage is what makes Tim the man he is. / Amy Chilton: Shirtlessly yelling at a foe only he can see. Relentlessly punching soft furnishings.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Text: BAD RELIGION / {{Chapter Opening for Bad Religion}} / [[Ryan Beckwith's face is attached to a line drawing of a man, dancing over flames.]]
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison BAD RELIGION
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Amy: Now we've mended bridges with Tim, let's go and see Ryan. / Shelley: We can't, Ames! / Shelley: His horrible old landlady won't let us in! And since his girlfriend blew up, he never comes out. / Amy: I thought you had a peppy, can-do attitude. / Shelley: I can only do when my personal safety is not at risk. I fear the wizened old crone. / Amy: What do you think she'll do? / Shelley: She'll make us watch a slide show called "A decade of scabs". The scabs will be her own.
Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison Shelley Winters: Has she gone, is she going? / Amy Chilton: She's getting into her citroen death-wagon. Let's go. / Shelley Winters: So how are we going to get through to poor Ryan? / Amy Chilton: I figured I'd flash my bum at him through his window. He'll be filled with virile thoughts and that will fix him good. / Shelley Winters: AMY! / Shelley Winters: You can't solve people's problems with your bottom! / Amy Chilton: Pff! Give it ten seconds, he'll be dancing.
 

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