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| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | {{Title page for the Count My Toes chapter}}
/ [[Shelley laying on a yellow couch in a black clothing (with green sleeves.) There is a pool of blood under her. The title card has arrows coming out of it pointing to the toes on Shelley's right foot]]
/ Title card: COUNT MY TOES http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040509 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley is reclining on a yellow slab. She's wearing black trousers, a black jacket with green sleeves, and black glasses. She's looking down at her bare feet, which have red nail polish on them. A puddle of blood is emerging from under her body and running down onto the floor.]]
/ Title: Count My Toes http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040509 |
| Scary Go Round | Amy: [[on phone]] Shelley, why aren't you here? The Inventor's Society barbeque is awesome! It's just the right mix of hard thinkin' and charred meat. You're returning a video I didn't take back? Well, I find that VERY hard to believe.
/ Tim: So, what have you been working on, Dr. Prion?
/ Dr. Prion: Jonesy, you'll like this. / Dr. Prion: I developed a device that allows me to control entire flocks of migrating birds. Shall I give it a blast?
/ Tim: That sounds like BAD SCIENCE to me, Prion. So, uh, just a quick razz.
/ Amy: [[on phone]] LOOK, unless you can offer me documentary evidence that it was "covered in jam", I don't--Fine, HANG UP. Someone's not getting any sticky ribs saved for her. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040510 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Various inventors' assistant girls are milling about, conversing. One is displaying a massive diamond ring.]]
/ Girl 1: So he gets down from the Galactic Spasmotron, gets down on one knee, and...
/ Girl 2: Oh-- My-- God.
/ Girl 3: So Amy, what's the deal with you and the notorious TIM JONES?
/ Amy: Well, Tim and I aren't romantically involved, we're just friends, I help him out and-- / Girl 3: Knock it off. Tim's a manly man. A man's man. You mean to say your eyes never met over a bubbling test tube?
/ Amy: Well, uh, you know, it never... / [[Girl 3 crosses her arms accusingly at Amy.]]
/ Girl 3: So where did you get your PhD, Amy?
/ Amy: The University of SHUT THE **** UP and leave me alone! Do you know it? http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040511 |
| Scary Go Round | Ryan: Hugo, it's real nice of you to rent out the top floor of the shop to me.
/ Hugo: A simple monetary transaction, dogg. Now, be aware. The flat has "broadbands". This is not a license to buy a internet Russian wife when you are feelin' melancholy after a skin-full of heavy. / Hugo: Yo in fact this will void your tenancy agreement and
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040512 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Ryan is unpacking a suitcase monogrammed "RQB." Hugo is holding a sparking Ethernet cable.]]
/ Ryan: Hugo, it's real nice of you to rent out the top floor of the shop to me.
/ Hugo: A simple monetary transaction, dogg.
/ Hugo: Now, be aware. The flat has "broadbands." This is not a license to buy an Internet Russian wife when you are feeling melancholy after a skin-full of heavy. / Hugo: Yo in fact this will void your tenancy agreement and--
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040512 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Shelly: Well, Amy, I would be at the Inventors Society barbecue if I wasn't taking back the video you swore you were taking back last week. Yes you DID! / Shelly: I'm not sure what's worse, the fine for taking it back late or the fact that I had to extract it from a pile consisting of your unwashed smalls and a discarded jam sandwich. / [[Plane nosedives into Shelly's car.]] http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040513 |
| Scary Go Round | Tim: Amy, I'm sure when you shoved that girl's face into the pasta salad then pushed her into the duckpond, you had a reason. Your random acts of violence are seldom random. / Amy: Tim, I have a question to ask you, and it's really important. Don't you find me--
/ Tim: Why are we slowing down? Why are we stopping? / Tim: MAN ALIVE, that's a lot of fire.
/ Official: I'm afraid you can't go any further, sir. A light plane crashed on the High Street.
/ Amy: Was anyone hurt?
/ Official: The general concensus was that this is the sort of thing you can't take personally. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040514 |
| May 14, 2004 | [[Amy and Tim are sitting on next to each other in the backseat of a car]]
/ Tim: Amy, I'm sure when you shoved that girl's face into the pasta salad then pushed her into the duckpond, you had a reason. Your random acts of violence are seldom random.
/ Amy: Tim, I have a question to ask you, and it's really important. Don't you find me-
/ Tim: Why are we slowing down? Why are we stopping?
/ [[Amy and Tim are standing outside with another man, near an area marked off with police tape]]
/ Tim: MAN ALIVE, that's a lot of fire.
/ Man: I'm afraid you can't go any further, sir. A light plane crashed on the High Street.
/ Amy: Was anyone hurt?
/ Man: The general consensus was that this is the sort of thing you can't take personally. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040514 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | {{Flash movie}}
/ [[Title page. Headstone reading: Scary Go Round - created by John Allison. Hand sticking out of ground holding sheet reading: Play! Subtitle: A guest animated comic dealy by Andrew Bell - http://www.creaturesinmyhead.com . In the bottom right corner a small Krakkagar running in a treadmill.]]
/ {{Click Play! sheet}} / [[Shelley sleeping in bed.]]
/ Shelley: Z Z Z
/ [[Focus moves up to window with moon.]]
/ {{Button appears in bottom right corner reading: continue. This happens every page from now on. Click it.}} / [[Clouds move before the moon. Lightning. Cut to Shelley's footend, where the door is.]] / [[Lightning. Door opens. Scary black creatures with read eyes appear. The sheet on her footend is gone, we see Shelley's feet.]] / [[Cut to Shelley's face. She's awake and scared, and hides her face partly under the sheet. Lightning.]] / [[Slowly and unobtrusively, Shelley turns on the bedside lamp.]] / [[Lightning. The creatures appear to be cardboard figures.]] / Shelley: AMY!
/ [[Shelley stands, out of bed, glasses on.]]
/ Shelley: Why the tupping heck are you "decorating" my room... / [[Amy is busy with cardboard and scissors at the kitchen table. Shelley is off screen.]]
/ Amy: Hi Shel!
/ Shelley: ... at *3 in the morning*? / Amy: Because I didn't want to wake you, silly! You looked so calm and sleepyheady. / [[Shelley pushes Amy through the room. Amy still holds a cardboard creature.]]
/ Shelley: *Get out...*
/ Amy: But it really needed something.. Its {{sic}} just so.. so.. blah! So *you*! / Shelley: GET OUT!
/ Amy: But I *live* here! ... And its {{sic}} *raining*! / [[Cut to outside. Amy and a creature are walking through the rain, each holding an umbrella.]]
/ Amy: Some people just can't appreciate the nice things you do for them! / [[Creature roars. Fade.]]
/ [[Hand sticking out of ground holding sheet reading: The end. Subtitle button: play again.]]
/ [[Small Krakkagar skips by in the background.]] http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040515 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | {{Flash movie}}
/ [[Title page. Headstone reading: Scary Go Round - created by John Allison. Hand sticking out of ground holding sheet reading: Play! Subtitle: A guest animated comic dealy by Andrew Bell - http://www.creaturesinmyhead.com . In the bottom right corner a small Krakkagar running in a treadmill.]]
/ {{Click Play! sheet}} / [[Shelley sleeping in bed.]]
/ Shelley: Z Z Z
/ [[Focus moves up to window with moon.]]
/ {{Button appears in bottom right corner reading: continue. This happens every page from now on. Click it.}} / [[Clouds move before the moon. Lightning. Cut to Shelley's footend, where the door is.]] / [[Lightning. Door opens. Scary black creatures with read eyes appear. The sheet on her footend is gone, we see Shelley's feet.]] / [[Cut to Shelley's face. She's awake and scared, and hides her face partly under the sheet. Lightning.]] / [[Slowly and unobtrusively, Shelley turns on the bedside lamp.]] / [[Lightning. The creatures appear to be cardboard figures.]] / Shelley: AMY!
/ [[Shelley stands, out of bed, glasses on.]]
/ Shelley: Why the tupping heck are you "decorating" my room... / [[Amy is busy with cardboard and scissors at the kitchen table. Shelley is off screen.]]
/ Amy: Hi Shel!
/ Shelley: ... at *3 in the morning*? / Amy: Because I didn't want to wake you, silly! You looked so calm and sleepyheady. / [[Shelley pushes Amy through the room. Amy still holds a cardboard creature.]]
/ Shelley: *Get out...*
/ Amy: But it really needed something.. Its {{sic}} just so.. so.. blah! So *you*! / Shelley: GET OUT!
/ Amy: But I *live* here! ... And its {{sic}} *raining*! / [[Cut to outside. Amy and a creature are walking through the rain, each holding an umbrella.]]
/ Amy: Some people just can't appreciate the nice things you do for them! / [[Creature roars. Fade.]]
/ [[Hand sticking out of ground holding sheet reading: The end. Subtitle button: play again.]]
/ [[Small Krakkagar skips by in the background.]] http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040515 |
| Shelly: Amy! Why the tupping heck are you "decorating" my room... / Amy: Hi Shel! / Shelly: ...At 3 in the morning? / Amy: Because I didn't want to wake you, silly! You looked so calm and sleepyheady. / Shelly: Get out... / Amy: But it really needed something... It's so... so... Blah! So you! / Shelly: Get out! / Amy: But I live here... and it's raining! / [Amy is now walking in the rain with an umbrella.] / Amy: Some people just can't appreciate the nice things you do for them! | |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley, battered, scratched and wrapped in a blanket, sits with Amy.]]
/ Shelley: Snif... the ninja car of Jesus.... dead...
/ Amy: It died for you, little friend! It died for your SINS! Promise me you won't ever let a plane crash on you again! / [[Tim sits at their feet with a sheaf of papers.]]
/ Tim: Do you know what the odds of your surviving a plan landing on your car and exploding are? Let me put it this way. Just be glad the universe isn't keeping score. / [[On a spaceship, an executive goblin brandishes a card with Shelley's face and a large X at a worker goblin.]]
/ Executive Goblin: Zefraim, I wish to speak to you about Terra-3901 resident Shelley-Winters-78654b. This unit should have expired 450 Terra-cycles ago! / Zephraim: Manifold apologies. Following the disintegration of Terra-3901 Bob-Hope-0003, I was sad. She has a pleasing existence. Please do not issue a memo. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040517 |
| May 17, 2004 | [[A bruised and ash-covered Shelley is wrapped in a blanket and sitting next to Amy.]]
/ Shelley: Snif... the ninja car of Jesus... dead...
/ Amy: It died for you, little friend! It died for your SINS! Promise me you won't ever let a plane crash on you ever again!
/ [[Tim is sitting on the ground near the girls' feet with a pile of papers in his lap]]
/ Tim: Do you know what the odds of your surviving a plane landing on your car and exploding are?
/ Tim: Let me put it this way. Just be glad the universe isn't keeping score.
/ [[Three green alien-looking figures are standing in a strange room. The first is holding a picture of Shelley up to the second, while the third is standing in the background.]]
/ First alien: Zefraim, I wish to speak to you about Terra-3901 resident Shelley-Winters-78654b.
/ First alien: This unit should have expired 450 Terra-cycles ago!
/ Second alien: Manifold apologies. Following the disintegration of Terra-3901 Bob-Hope-0003, I was sad. She has a pleasing existence. Please do not issue a memo. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040517 |
| Scary Go Round | Biker: Robbie, I see what you're saying. As far as i can work out, a woman is like a car, but without wheels, and instead of a horn, she has "emotions".
/ Robbie: You're gettin' it man, you're gettin' it. [[to Ralph]] What you lookin' at, old timer?
/ Ralph: Gumblin' gumbles... / Tessa: What can I do for you gentlemen?
/ Robbie: A couple pints of heavy, darlin'. / Robbie: [[to Ryan]] What's YOUR problem?
/ Ryan: No matter how good you shave, there's always a few spider legs stickin' out.
/ Robbie: Damn, I hear ya. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040518 |
| May 18, 2004 | [[Two men in biker jackets are entering a bar called "the Ragged Stoat" while an old man walks away, grumbling]]
/ First biker: Robbie, I see what you're saying. As far as I can work out, a woman is like a car, but without wheels, and instead of a horn, she has "emotions".
/ Second biker: You're gettin' it, man, you're gettin' it.
/ Second biker (to old man): What are you lookin' at, old timer?
/ Old man: Gumblin' gumbles...
/ [[The two bikers are standing inside the bar at the bar, talking to Tessa (the woman keeping the bar)]]
/ Tessa: What can I do for you gentlemen?
/ Second biker: A couple of pints of heavy, darlin'.
/ [[The second biker is sitting next to Ryan at the bar. Ryan is gazing sadly at a steaming cup in his hand.]]
/ Second biker (to Ryan): What's YOUR problem?
/ Ryan: No matter how good you shave, there's always a few spider legs stickin' out.
/ Second biker: Damn, I hear ya. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040518 |
| Scary Go Round | Robbie: Say, you seen this lady about? Name of Val DeVere.
/ Rachel: No, I... wait, YEAH! I've seen her about. She looks a little different, she dyed her hair red, and she wears glasses. Her voice may be squeakier than you remember.
/ Biker: Figures she'd be trying to hide. / Biker: Val's man left the Corby chapter in bad standing. Insult to injury, she shopped a bunch of lads for legitimate grey market business activities.
/ Robbie: 'Preciate the assistance. / Tessa: What. Did. You. Just. Do?
/ Rachel: Gosh, Tessa, I'm just stirring the pot! Rattling the coats in the cupboard! Shaking out the dusty curtains! Making things JOLLY! http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040519 |
| May 19, 2004 | [[Rachel is looking at a picture of a man in a biker jacket standing next to a green-eyed blonde-haired attractive woman. Rachel is standing next to two bikers, who are sitting down. One biker is bearded, while the other is clean-shaven and wearing a red T-shirt]]
/ Bearded biker: Say, you seen this lady about?
/ Name of Val DeVere.
/ Rachel: No, I... wait, YEAH! I've seen her about.
/ She looks a little different, she dyed her hair red, and she wears glasses
/ Her voice may be... squeakier than you remember.
/ Other biker: Figures she'd be trying to hide. / [[The bikers are getting up and putting on their jackets, preparing to leave. Rachel is standing with them.]]
/ Clean-shaven biker: Val's man left the Corby chapter in bad standing.
/ Insult to injury, she shopped a bunch of lads for legitimate grey market bsiness activities.
/ Bearded biker: 'Preciate the assistance. / [[Rachel is sitting at a table, with Tessa leaning on the table, standing over her and looking enranged.]]
/ Tessa: What.
/ Did.
/ You.
/ Just.
/ Do?
/ Rachel: Gosh, Tessa, I'm just stirring the pot!
/ Rattling the coats in the cupboard!
/ Shaking out the dusty cutains!
/ Making things JOLLY! http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040519 |
| Scary Go Round | Tessa: Does she understand why I'm not talking to her? Can you make it absolutely plain?
/ Rachel: Tessa, Tessa, what's the worst that can happen? Tell her, William! Biker gangs are reasonable people, nothing's going to happen to Shelley.
/ William: Rachel, I'm not saying ANYTHING. / Mayor: Would you like a lift home?
/ Shelley: Thank you, Mr Mayor, but I'm going to take my insurance cheque to the car dealership and make them dance for me. / Mayor: Do you have a haggling technique?
/ Shelley: Oh, I'm tough. Last time I got them to put air in the tyres for me AND give me a spare wheel. Sha-zam. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040520 |
| May 20, 2004 | [[Tessa, Rachel and William are sitting around a table. Tessa has her head turned away from the table, Rachel has her elbows on the table and her head in her hands, and William has his chin resting on his folded arms, which are resting on the table.]]
/ Tessa: Does she not understand why I'm not talking to her?
/ Can you make it absolutely plain?
/ Rachel: Tessa, Tessa, what's the worst that can happen?
/ Tell her, William!
/ Biker gangs are reasonable people, nothing's going to happen to Shelley.
/ William: Rachel, I'm not saying ANYTHING. / [[Shelley is standing in her office with the Mayor. Shelley is putting on her messenger bag, and the Mayor has a pipe in his mouth.]]
/ Mayor: Would you like a lift home?
/ Shelley: Thank you, Mr Mayor, but I'm going to take my insurance cheque to the car dealership and make them dance for me. / [[The Mayor and Shelley are walking down the street.]]
/ Mayor: Do you have a haggling technique?
/ Shelley: Oh, I'm tough.
/ Last time I got them to put air in the tyres for me AND give me a spare wheel.
/ Sha-zam. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040520 |
| Scary Go Round | Shelley: Now, what is a pretty good sort of car... will £3000 get me a Mercedes? It is my dream to be classy.
/ Biker: Hey Val! This is from Chopper and the boys in HM Brixton!
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040521 |
| May 21, 2004 | [[Shelley is walking down the street, reading a magazine called "What Car".]]
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040521 |
| Scary Go Round | Shelley: Well, THAT wasn't very nice. I hope those gentlement realise that I'm going to call the police.
/ Natalie: Call them Shelley, they will not care. In a plus tragique turn of events, your time on this mortal coil 'as been discontinued. Welcome to ze waiting room between ze last world and ze next. / Natalie: I am Natalie Durand. We met briefly in the days when I had 'opes, dreams, and a viable body with which to carry them out. Hello.
/ Shelley: H-hello. / Natalie: You make an exquisite corpse, Shelley.
/ Shelley: Thank... you.
/ Natalie: Let us go before an urban fox eats your nose and spoils ze effect. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040524 |
| May 24, 2004 | [[The body of Shelley is lying on the ground in a puddle of blood. The ghost of Shelley is sitting up, rising from the body. She is wearing a black dress with skulls on it and a grey cardigan over it. The ghost of Natalie is sitting next to her.]]
/ Shelley: Well, that wasn't very nice.
/ I hope those gentlemen realise that I'm going to call the police.
/ Natalie: Call them Shelley, they will not care.
/ In a plus tragique turn of events, your turn on this mortal coil 'as been discontinued.
/ Welcome to ze waiting between ze last world and ze next. / [[The ghost of Natalie is shaking hands with the ghost of Shelley.]]
/ Natalie: I am Natalie Durand.
/ We met briefly in the days when I had 'opes, dreams, and a viable body with which to carry them out.
/ Hello.
/ Shelley: H-hello. / [[Natalie's ghost is bending over, looking at Shelley's body. Shelley's ghost is standing behind her.]]
/ Natalie: You make an exquisite corpse, Shelley.
/ Shelley: Thank... you
/ Natalie: Let us go before an urban fox eats your nose and spoils ze effect. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040524 |
| Scary Go Round | Shelley: I WAAAAANT MY MUMMY!
/ Natalie: Shelley, you cannot 'ave your mummy. You 'ave got me. I am perfectly adequate. / Natalie: Before I was blown into ze tiny parts by a bad monkey, I was a decent enough 'uman being. Just imagine some dismal phantasm takes you under 'is wing. / Natalie: Stick wiz me, you will stick to ze spectral straight-and-narrow.
/ Shelley: What... what if I don't?
/ Natalie: I imagine you will significantly increase your chance of living inside a boiler for the next seventy years. Or maybe, if you are lucky, you just become a screaming cloud of ectoplasm full of very sharp teeth. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040525 |
| May 25, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are walking down a pink- and red-hued street. Shelley has her head tilted down, looking at the ground; Natalie is standing next to her and has one arm around Shelley's back.]]
/ Shelley:I WAAAAAAANT MY MUMMY!
/ Natalie:Shelley, you cannot 'ave your mummy.
/ You 'ave got me.
/ I am perfectly adequate. / [[Shelley and Natalie are walking up the street, with Natalie in front of Shelley. The background is all red.]]
/ Natalie:Before I was blown into ze tiny parts by a bad monkey, I was a decent enough 'uman being.
/ Just imagine some dismal phantasm takes you under 'is wing. / [[Shelley and Natalie are facing each other, holding hands with the arms extended, in front of a Souveneir shop.]]
/ Natalie: Stick wiz me, you will stick to ze spectral straight-and-narroww.
/ Shelley: What... what if I don't?
/ Natalie: I imagine you will significantly increase your chance of living inside a boiler for the next seventy years.
/ Or maybe, if you are lucky, you just bcome a screaming cloud of ectoplasm full of very sharp teeth. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040525 |
| Scary Go Round | Shelley: It's very nice of you to look out for me.
/ Natalie: It is not anything! It's hard to be a new girl in a town, and this is a strange town, yes? / Natalie: 'Ave a look in your pocket, you should have your induction pack. / Shelley: I always wondered, if you got thin enough on the Atkins diet, if someone could fly you like a kite.
/ Natalie: Ze skin paper thin, ze strong wind, ze trail of ribbon bows 'anging from your bottom? I thought of zis too! But I imagined it as ze upside of dysentery. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040526 |
| May 26, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in front of a large black chairlift. The sky behind them is red. Shelley is climbing into the chairlift and Natalie is standing behind her.]]
/ Shelley: It's very nice of you to look out for me.
/ Natalie: It is not anything! It's hard to be new new girl in a town, and this is a strange town, yes? / [[Shelley and Natalie are seated in the chairlift. Shelley is leaning forward and has one hand in her pocket. Natalie is closing the door to the chairlift.]]
/ Natalie: 'Ave a look in your pocket, you should 'ave your induction pack. / [[Shelley and Natalie are sitting in the chairlift. The chairlift is hanging over a huge red gate with the words "Land of the Dead" written on it. They are taking the chairlift over the gate.]]
/ Shelley: I always wondered, if you got thin enough on the Atkins diet, if someone could fly you like a kite.
/ Natalie: Ze skin paper thin, ze strong wind, ze trail of ribbon bows 'anging from your bottom?
/ I thought of zis too!
/ But I imagined it as ze upside of dysentery. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040526 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley and Natalie stand at the exit of the skycar into the Land of the Dead. Shelley examines a pamphlet.]] / Shelley: "Dear Shelley, welcome to the LAND OF THE DEAD... where the dead do some waiting around. Enjoy your stay!" The rest is just adverts!
/ Natalie: Yes, it is a shambles. / [[The pamphlet is shown: the message read by Shelley is signed "Archangel Gabriel, COO", with a picture of a goblin. To the right is an ad for "TRY KOALA POLE! Sick of problem marsupials? Poke them into a state of irrational madness! Koala Pole with a mint on the end: for a mellow, persistent grumble. Koala Pole with a comb on the end: to generate unwanted fuss. Koala Pole with plughole hairs on the end: for an incandescent rage. Operators standing by! $5.99"]] / [[Shelley and Natalie get in line.]]
/ Shelley: What I want to know is, what's with the hold up? I'm ready for the next world.
/ Natalie: We are ze flotsam and jetsam of creation. Heaven was built for a smaller world. We just 'ave to wait around. / [[Shelley notices a sign reading "85 HOURS" and frowns, then produces a black marker.]]
/ Shelley: Would you like a prison tattoo? I can draw a pretty good spider's web.
/ Natalie: Well ok. Just a little one. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040527 |
| May 27, 2004 | [[Shelley is holding a long pamphlet in her hand and is reading it. Natalie is standing next to her.]]
/ Shelley: "Dear Shelley, welcome to the LAND OF THE DEAD...
/ ...where the dead do some waiting around.
/ Enjoy your stay!"
/ The rest is just adverts!
/ Natalie: Yes, it is a shambles. / [[A close-up of the front of the pamphlet is seen.]]
/ [[On the left, is a message saying: "Hello! Welcome to the land of the Dead, where the dead do some waiting around. Enjoy your stay!" and it is signed "Gabriel" with "Archangel Gabriel COO" written under the message. Under that is a picture of a green elf.]]
/ [[On the right is a picture of a pink ghost with a large pole next to a koala in a tree. Above the picture, it says "Sick of problem marsupials?" and under the picture it says: "TRY KOALA POLE! Poke them into a state of irrational madness. Koala Pole ith a mint on the end: for a mellow, persistent grumble. Koala Pole with a comb on the end: to generate unwanted fuss. Koala Pole with plughole hairs on the end: for an incandescent rage."]] / [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in line behind a person wearing a long purple cloak.]]
/ Shelley: What I want to know is, what's with the hold up?
/ I'm ready for the next world.
/ Natalie: We are ze flotsam and jetsam of creation.
/ Heaven was built for a smaller world.
/ We just 'ave to wait around. / [[Shelley and Natalie are still in line, behind a red rope. Next to them is a sign that says "85 hours." Shelley is holding a pen and Natalie is pulling up her sleeve.]]
/ Shelley: Would you like a prison tattoo?
/ I can draw a pretty good spider's web.
/ Natalie: Well, ok.
/ Just a little one. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040527 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley and Natalie are almost at the front of the line. Shelley lifts her shirt to show one of the bullet-holes that killed her.]]
/ Shelley: Natalie, I'm a holey ghost! Ha ha! That is my idea of a joke!
/ Natalie: When you arrive, you look pretty much as you were when you let the world. Thereafter, your self-percetpion 'olds you together. / [[Natalie holds up her ID card, on which her picture shows her burnt hairless, with a melted eye, smiling brightly.]]
/ Natalie: My identity card tells ze sorry story. I 'ad to concentrate pretty 'ard to restore my gamine charms, yes? Give it a couple of centuries and it is easy to let yourself go. / [[It's Shelley's turn, and she poses for the camera to take her ID picture.]]
/ Shelley: How did you know I was going to die, Natalie?
/ Natalie: Ze local arrivals board. I am waiting for ze death of ze old women who 'ad me blown up, and zere you are. / [[Shelley takes her ID card from the printer machine.]]
/ Shelley: You should forgive. Forgive and forget.
/ Natalie: Yes! Forgive, fill them with ballbearings, roll them into the sea, forget. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040528 |
| May 28, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in line. Shelley has her shirt pulled up, revealing a bullet hole in her stomach. Natalie is holding out an identity card with a picture of herself as she looked when she died. In front of them in line is someone in a purple robe talking to a green elf.]]
/ Shelley: Natalie, I'm a holey ghost!
/ Ha ha!
/ That is my idea of a joke!
/ Natalie: When you arrive, you look pretty much as you were when you left ze world.
/ Thereafter, your self-perception 'olds you together.
/ My identity card tells ze sorry story.
/ I 'ad to concentrate pretty 'ard to restore my gamine charms, yes?
/ Give it a couple of centuries and it is easy to let yourself go. / [[Shelley is standing in front of a white backdrop, posing for a photograph for a green elf working the camera. Natalie is standing next to her, but out of the line of the photo.]]
/ Shelley: How did you know I was going to die, Natalie?
/ Natalie: Ze local arrivals board!
/ I am waiting for ze death of ze old women who 'ad me blown up, and zere you are. / [[Shelley is taking her new identity card out of a printer. Natalie is standing behind her.]]
/ Shelley: You should forgive.
/ Forgive and forget.
/ Natalie: Yes!
/ Forgive, fill them with ballbearings, roll them into ze sea, forget. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040528 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley and Natalie ride through the Land of the Dead on a carriage steered by Leppo.]]
/ Shelley: Natalie, who is the man who is driving the cart in which we are sitting? Is he a good man or a bad man?
/ Natalie: Zis is Leppo! I meet him in the hours after my tragic explosion. Zere I am, a sad ghost, she is waiting to get to heaven because she knows no better. Also, bits are fast dropping off me. / Natalie: Leppo is ze rag-and-bone man of ze dead! He comes by in his buggy and drops me off at ze cablecars. Say hello to him, he is nice! / Shelley: So you and Natalie are... friends?
/ Leppo: In my game, it's nice to see a lady doesn't look like a melted candle, doesn't spend the whole trip talkin' bout her kidneys. Doesn't tell you what medication she's takin' before she tells you her name. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040531 |
| May 31, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are sitting in the backseat of an open cart. The cart is being driven by a blonde man in a black suit and hat. He has bright red eyes. They are traveling through streets that look like a normal city, but with a red sky.]]
/ Shelley: Natalie, who is this man who is driving the cart in which we are sitting?
/ Is he a good man or a bad man?
/ Natalie: Zis is Leppo!
/ I meet him in the hours after my tragic explosion.
/ Zere I am, a sad ghost, she is waiting to get to heaven because she knows no better.
/ Also, bits are fast dropping off me. / [[Shelley and Natalie are still sitting behind the driver, who is facing away from them.]]
/ Natalie: Leppo is ze rag-and-bone man of ze dead! He comes by in his buggy and drops me off at ze cablecars.
/ Say hello to him, he is nice! / [[Shelley leans forward to talk to Leppo. Natalie stays sitting, leaning back.]]
/ Shelley: So you and Natalie are... friends?
/ Leppo: In my game, it's nice to see a lady doesn't look a little like a melted candle, doesn't spend the whole trip talkin' bout her kidneys.
/ Doesn't tell you what medication she's takin' before she tells you her name. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040531 |
| June 1, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are standing next to a telephone pole. Shelley is holding a large map, and she and Natalie are looking at it together.]]
/ Natalie: So I am trying to work out what to do 'ere in the Land of ze Dead, when something most unfortunate occurs!
/ Shelley: What what?? / [[FLASHBACK: Natalie is standing in her kitchen, being sucked into her teapot.]]
/ Natalie (narrating): I am minding ze business of my own when I am suddenly sucked through a little 'ole in space-time! / [[FLASHBACK CONTINUES: Natalie is trapped in a cage with four elderly women standing in front of her, outside of the cage.]]
/ Natalie (narrating): All of a sudden I am surrounded by ze same withered hags who I 'old responsible for my demise!
/ Zey 'ave constructed a prison for me in their palace of chintz. / [[FLASHBACK CONTINUES: Natalie is still trapped in the cage alone.]]
/ Natalie (narrating): So there I stay for weeks, counting ze ceiling tiles and making obscene gestures.
/ Natalie (in the flashback): Stick it in your ear, shellfish face! / [[FLASHBACK CONTINUES: Natalie is trapped in the cage. The four old women are standing around the cage, with one reading from a book titled "Teh Spookie Waye" and eating a piece of cake.]]
/ Natalie (narrating): Just as madness seems my best refuge, Ivy discovers an incantation to disintegrate a restless spirit into bits.
/ Oh, I am DELIGHTED.
/ First old woman: She's got a face like a smacked arse, Hilda.
/ Natalie (narrating): Quite why Maud (ze little fat one who is like a mole) decides to recite zis with a mouthful of cake is beyond me.
/ Maud: ich verde vom... nyom nyom... Gift gebildet, also zerstore ich Sie mit (gulp) tausend kleinen Durschlagen... / [[FLASHBACK CONTINUES: a giant black bug is standing in the shattered remains of the cage, eating one of the old women.]]
/ Natalie (narrating): But she only 'ad 'erself to blame when a big black bug burst out of nowhere, broke my cage and ate Doris. / [[Natalie and Shelley are standing together. Natalie is holding a map.]]
/ Shelley: Did you leg it?
/ Natalie: I 'ad it away on my toes like ze man who escapes ze scorned love in only 'is Reeboks.
/ GREASY FAST SPEED. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040601 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Natalie Durand: So I am trying to work out what to do 'ere in the Land of ze Dead, when something most unfortunate occurs!
/ Shelley Winters: What what?? / Natalie Durand: I am minding ze business of my own when I am suddenly sucked through a little 'ole in space-time! / Natalie Durand: All of the sudden I am surrounded by ze same withered hags who I 'old responsible for my demise! Zey 'ave constructed a prison for me in their palace of chintz. / Natalie Durand: So there I stay for weeks, counting ze ceiling tiles and making obscene gestures.
/ Natalie Durand: Stick it in your ear, shellfish face! / Natalie Durand: Just as madness seems my best refuge, Ivy discovers an incantation to disintegrate a restless spirit into bits. Oh, I am DELIGHTED. / Ivy: She's got a face like a smacked arse, Hilda.
/ Maud: ich werde vom...nyom nyom... Gift gebildet, also zerstore ich Sie mit (gulp) tausend kleinen Durchschlagen...
/ Natalie Durand: Quite why Maud (ze little fat one who is like a mole) decides to recite zis with a mouthful of cake is beyond me. / Natalie Durand: But she only 'ad 'erself to blame when a big black bug burst out of nowhere, broke my cage and ate Doris.
/ [[Krakkagar is eating Doris.]]
/ Shelley Winters: Did you leg it? / Natalie Durand: I 'ad it away on my toes like ze man who escapes ze scorned lover in only 'is Reeboks. GREASY FAST SPEED. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040601 |
| June 2, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in an apartment with grey walls. Natalie is hanging up her coat.]]
/ Natalie: Well Shelley, 'ere you go.
/ Zis is where you will be living until you enter the after-afterlife.
/ Shelley: What is this clock?
/ It's counting down. / [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in front of a black clock which has two weights hanging down.]]
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040602 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Natalie Durand: Well Shelley, 'ere you go. Zis is where you will be living until you enter the after-afterlife.
/ Shelley Winters: What is this clock? It's counting down. / Natalie Durand: Zat shows 'ow long you 'ave to spend 'ere. Ze time is derived from 'ow good you were in life.
/ Shelley Winters: Thirty-four days? That's a long wait. / Natalie Durand: Jesus, Mary and all ze little children! Mine says SEVETEEN YEARS!
/ Shelley Winters: I tried to be a good girl. I tried to live my life right. It was hard but I tried. / Natalie Durand: You never fried ants with ze magnifying glass? Or pushed over a cow?
/ Shelley Winters: Well, um, no. When I did bad things it just made boys happy. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040602 |
| June 3, 2004 | [[Natalie and Shelley are sitting at a table in a cafe.]]
/ Shelley: Natalie, I don't want to be trans-substantiated into a field of ecstatic energy in 33 days.
/ I want to go back to living life on earth.
/ Natalie: Shelley zis is a pipe-dream.
/ Shelley: I mean it, and it is makin' me mad!
/ I have not had my time yet, and neither have you.
/ We should be making our mark and making babies. / [[Natalie and Shelley are still sitting at the table. Natalie is holding a small green elf, which is sucking on a pacifer and wearing a diaper. Shelley is writing on a tablet of paper.]]
/ Natalie: Oh, I made a baby.
/ Shelley: That is very nice, but I want to go back.
/ And not as some crazy banshee with a bee in her bonnet about something. / [[Shelley and Natalie are still sitting at the table. Natalie is leaning back in her seat with her arms crossed, and Shelley is writing on a piece of paper.]]
/ Natalie: Well tell us how to do zat, lightbulb 'ead!
/ Shelley: I am scrabbling for ideas, Nat.
/ Scrabbling ilke a rat in the dust.
/ A rat that does not even know what an idea looks like. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040603 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Shelley Winters: Natalie, I don't want to be trans-substantiated into a field of ecstatic energy in 33 days. I want to go back to living life on earth.
/ Natalie Durand: Shelley zis is a pipe-dream.
/ Shelley Winters: I mean it, and it is makin' me mad! I have not had my time yet, and neither have you. We should be making our mark and making babies. / Natalie Durand: Oh, I made a baby.
/ Shelley Winters: That is very nice, but I want to go back. And not as some crazy banshee with a bee in her bonnet about something. / Natalie Durand: Well, tell us how to do zat, lightbulb 'ead!
/ Shelley Winters: I am scrabbling for ideas, Nat. Scrabbling like a rat in the dust. A rat that does not even know what an idea looks like. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040603 |
| June 4, 2004 | [[Shelley and Natalie are sitting with Leppo, the cart-driver.]]
/ Natalie: She wants to get back to ze land of ze living, Leppo.
/ Leppo: Plenty folks here do.
/ Living's a game you want to keep playing.
/ There's many a tortured soul lit a fire under their ass and shot themselves into the sky to have it out with God.
/ Every one of them came back a smart pile of ash who wishes they never tried.
/ Shelley: You're a wise old owl! / [[Shelley is standing behind Leppo, who is scratching his head.]]
/ Leppo: Do this wise old owl a little favour.
/ He'll tell you the one way to get back to the business of breathing.
/ Shelley: A favour?
/ What?
/ [[Leppo and Shelley are facing each other.]]
/ Leppo: Seventy years ago, Leppo lost his teeth in a game of hearts to a woman named Black Betty.
/ I'm tired of suckin' plums. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040604 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Natalie Durand: She wants to get back to ze land of ze living, Leppo.
/ Leppo: Plenty folks do. Living's a game you want to keep playing. There's many a tortured soul lit a fire under their ass and hsot themselves into the sky to have it out with God. Every one of them came back a smart pile of ash who wishes they never tried.
/ Shelley Winters: You're a wise old owl! / Leppo: Do this wise old owl a little favour, he'll tell you the one way to get back to the business of breathing.
/ Shelley Winters: A favour? What? / Leppo: Seventy years ago, Leppo lost his teeth in a game of hearts to a woman named BLACK BETTY. I'm tired of suckin' plums. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040604 |
| June 7, 2004 | [[Natalie and Shelley are sitting together. Shelley has her bag open and is looking inside.]]
/ Natalie: Shelley, it is a long journey to Black Betty's Palace of Sin.
/ Do you 'ave everything we need?
/ Shelley: Clean undercrackers: check.
/ Koala poles: check.
/ Sammiches X 10: CHECK. / [[Shelley and Natalie are walking don the streeth. Natalie is holding a brown paper bag.]]
/ Shelley: I made you horse sausage sammiches.
/ But I thing it is wrong, wrong for the poor horse.
/ I made them in the spirit of entente cordiale. / [[Shelley and Natalie are standing in front of a train.]]
/ Natalie: You are so squeamish for M. Horse!
/ But how is 'e any different from Mme. Cow?
/ Cow is kind, with nice eyes.
/ Sir Horse looks like a psychopath to me.
/ Shelley: Hee! / Shelley: Are you mad at horses because no one would buy you a pony as a girl?
/ Natalie: I 'ate ze horse.
/ If Papa 'ad bought me a pony, I would 'ave been making glue by supper time. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040607 |
| Natalie Durand: Shelley, it is a long journey to Black Betty's Palace of Sin. Do you 'ave everything we need? / Shelley Winters: Clean undercrackers: check. Koala poles: check. Sammiches X 10: CHECK. / Shelley Winters: I made you horse sausage sammiches. But I think it is wrong, wrong for the poor horse. I made them in the spirit of entente cordiale. / Natalie Durand: You are so squeamish for M. Horse! But how is 'e any different from Mme. Cow? Cow is kind, with nice eyes. Sir Horse looks like a psychopath to me. / Shelley Winters: Hee! / Shelley Winters: Are you mad at horses because no one would buy you a pony as a girl? / Natalie Durand: I 'ate ze horse. If Papa 'ad brought me a pony, I would 'ave been making glue by supper time. | |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Natalie and Shelley are sitting, looking into a bag]]
/ Natalie: Shelley, it is a long journey to Black Betty's Palace of Sin.
/ Natalie: Do you 'ave everything we need?
/ Shelley: Clean undercrackers: check.
/ Shelley: Koala poles: check.
/ Shelley: Sammiches X 10: CHECK. / [[Natalie and Shelley are walking along a bridge. Natalie is holding a paper bag.]]
/ Shelley: I made you horse sausage sammiches.
/ Shelley: But I think it is wrong, wrong for the poor horse.
/ Shelley: I made them in the spirit of the entente cordiale. / [[Natlalie and Shelley arrive at a public transport system.]]
/ Natalie: You are so squeamish for M. Horse!
/ Natalie: But how is 'e any different from Mme. Cow?
/ Natalie: Cow is kind, with nice eyes.
/ Natalie: Sir Horse looks like a psychopath to me.
/ Shelley: Hee! / [[Natalie and Shelley face the public transport.]]
/ Shelley: Are you mad at horses because no one would buy you a pony as a girl?
/ Natalie: I 'ate ze horse.
/ Natalie: If Papa 'ad bought me a pony, i would 'ave been making glue by supper time. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040608 |
| June 8, 2004 | [[Ryan and a biker are sitting at a bar together. Fallon is standing near the bar, farther down.]]
/ Ryan: ...so anyway it turns out that William the Conqueror was actually just a couple of dogs that the French tied together and put a crown on.
/ Biker: Damn, Beckwith, you sure got a way of making history interesting to the common man.
/ Fallon: Are you ready to go, Ryan? / [[Fallon and Ryan are walking outside of the bar.]]
/ Fallon: What were you doing talking to them?
/ They were from the Cheeky Pistons, the notorious biker gang.
/ Ryan: They just seemed like ordinary fellows!
/ They assured me their weapons were for huntin'. / [[Fallon and Ryan are getting into a car.]]
/ Fallon: They're responsible for drug trafficking, racketeering, kidnap, murder...
/ Ryan: And buying me this bag of pork scratchings!
/ Do you want a gooey one? http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040608 |
| June 9, 2004 | [[Fallon and Ryan are in a store, shopping.]]
/ Ryan: Hardwares sure are complicated.
/ Usually I just let filth build up until it reaches critical mass and starts to break down nat'rally.
/ Fallon: Ladies don't like that, Ryan, they want to see surfaces.
/ A smart girl takes a discarded, half-eaten pork chop in the middle of the living room floor as a WARNING SIGN. / Ryan: I've got a new way.
/ You're a civilisin' influence.
/ Old meat as the centrepiece of a room is a thing of the past.
/ Fallon: Good. / Ryan: What's your policy on yogurt pots maybe havin' a race to see who can grow mould the fastest?
/ Fallon: NO.
/ Ryan: But that's how diseases get cured! http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040609 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Ryan Beckwith and Fallon Young are at a store. He is caring a red plastic shopping basket and she is holding a retail good. Marketing signs note that "this is kind of cheap" and encourage shoppers to "spazz out! spazz out!"]]
/ Ryan: Hardwares sure are complicated. Usually I just let filth build up until it reaches critical mass and starts to break down nat'rally.
/ Fallon: Ladies don't like that Ryan. They want to see surfaces.
/ Fallon: A smart girl takes a discarded, half-eaten pork chop in the middle of the living room floor as a WARNING SIGN. / [[Fallon places her object in Ryan's basket. He beams proudly.]]
/ Ryan: I've got a new way. You're a civilisin' influence. Old meat as the centrepiece of a room is a thing of the past.
/ Fallon: Good. / [[Fallon turns away and Ryan looks thoughtful.]]
/ Ryan: What's your policy on yogurt pots maybe havin' a race to see who can grow mould the fastest?
/ Fallon: NO.
/ Ryan: But that's how diseases get cured! http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040609 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Ryan Beckwith and Fallon Young are at a store. He is caring a red plastic shopping basket and she is holding a retail good. Marketing signs note that "this is kind of cheap" and encourage shoppers to "spazz out! spazz out!"]]
/ Ryan: Hardwares sure are complicated. Usually I just let filth build up until it reaches critical mass and starts to break down nat'rally.
/ Fallon: Ladies don't like that Ryan. They want to see surfaces.
/ Fallon: A smart girl takes a discarded, half-eaten pork chop in the middle of the living room floor as a WARNING SIGN. / [[Fallon places her object in Ryan's basket. He beams proudly.]]
/ Ryan: I've got a new way. You're a civilisin' influence. Old meat as the centrepiece of a room is a thing of the past.
/ Fallon: Good. / [[Fallon turns away and Ryan looks thoughtful.]]
/ Ryan: What's your policy on yogurt pots maybe havin' a race to see who can grow mould the fastest?
/ Fallon: NO.
/ Ryan: But that's how diseases get cured! http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040609 |
| June 10, 2004 | [[Ryan is standing, looking at a row of trash bins. A sign next to the bin says: "Bins: Empty them or they smell."]]
/ Ryan (in thoughts): Dang here we are just lookin' at pedal bins for my flat and kind of an awkward silence has developed. / [[Ryan and Fallon are looking at trash bins together.]]
/ Ryan (in thoughts): Now me and Fallon done a lot of talkin' over the precedin' year so maybe this is relevant.
/ Also on the PA system it is Foreigner, that is heightening the tension somewhat. / [[Fallon and Ryan's hands brush.]]
/ Ryan (in thoughts): There has got to be room here for the I-am-scratchin'-my-leg-but-also-brushin'-against-your-hand deal. / [[Fallon and Ryan hold hands.]]
/ Ryan (in thoughts): Man, ok, now I got to break the silence with something meaningful but non-committal.
/ GOTS TO BE A PRO.
/ Ryan (out loud): So... um... cauterisation. THERE'S something they never teach you about... at school. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040610 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Ryan Beckwith (inner monologue): Dang here we are just lookin' at pedal bins for my flat and kind of an awkward silence has developed. / Ryan Beckwith (inner monologue): Now me and Fallon done a lot of talkin' over the precedin' year so maybe this is relevant. Also on the PA system it is Foreigner, that is heightening the tension somewhat. / Ryan Beckwith (inner monologue): There has got to be room for the I-am-scratchin'-my leg-but-also-brushin'-against-your-hand deal. / Ryan Beckwith (inner monologue): Man, ok, now I got to break the silence with something meaningful but non-commital. GOTS TO BE A PRO.
/ Ryan Beckwith: So...um...cauterisation. THERE'S something they never teach you about... at school. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040610 |
| June 11, 2004 | [[Ryan and Fallon are walking down the street, holding hands.]]
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040611 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040611 |
| June 14, 2004 | [[Fallon and Ryan are driving in a VW bug convertible. In the background, an ambulance is pulling away with its lights flashing.]]
/ Fallon: Why would anyone shoot poor Shelley?
/ Ryan: If a lady lives a dangerous life, she must be ready for OLD MAN CONSEQUENCE and his hand cart of sadness. / Fallon: No one would shoot her.
/ She hardly represents a clear and present danger.
/ Ryan: On the side of the hand-cart is painted the word: TURMOIL. / Fallon: Unless you count a clear and present danger of telling a dirty joke then pretending not to understand it.
/ Ryan: Yeah.
/ Or tittering. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040614 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | Fallon Young: Why would anyone shoot poor Shelley?
/ Ryan Beckwith: If a lady lives a dangerous life, she must be ready for OLD MAN CONSEQUENCE and his hand-cart of sadness. / Fallon Young: No one would shoot her. She hardly represents a clear and present danger.
/ Ryan Beckwith: On the side of the hand-cart is painted the word: TURMOIL. / Fallon Young: Unless you count a clear and present dnager of telling a dirty joke then pretending not to understand it.
/ Ryan Beckwith: Yeah. Or TITTERING. http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040614 |
| June 15, 2004 | [[A huge black woman (Black Betty) with lots of teeth is standing in a doorway. Shelley and Natalie are standing in front of him.]]
/ Black Betty: Well hello, chill'en!
/ What can Black Betty do for you this fine, fine day?
/ Natalie: We're here from Pro-Active marketing to ask you a few questions about your TEETH... / Black Betty: Now then see, Betty has the finest set of teeth hereabouts, so I doubt there's anything you two scrappers can do for me.
/ No offense intended, hear? / [[Black Betty slams the door shut.]]
/ < http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040615 |
| Black Betty: Well hello, chill'en! What can Black Betty do for you this fine, fine day?
/ Natalie Durand: We're here from Pro-Active marketing to ask you a few questions about your TEETH... / Black Betty: Now then see, Betty has the finest set of teeth hereabouts, so I doubt there's anything you two scrappers can do for me. No offence intended, hear? / < |
|
| June 16, 2004 | [[Natalie and Shelley are wearing fake moustaches and hats and talking to Black Betty.]]
/ Natalie: Good afternoon to you, madam.
/ Shelley: We're a couple of card sharps just died in a Mississippi riverboat crash.
/ Do y'all happen to know where we can find a game in this pleasin' vicinity?
/ Black Betty: Well gentlemen, I'm not much of a player but I'd be glad let you'm educate me. / [[Black Betty is playing cards with Shelley and Natalie.]]
/ Natalie (whispered): She is no player of cards at all!
/ Black Betty: Well now, I seem to have used up all my money. How about I raise you ONE SET OF TEETH. / Shelley: I'm in!
/ Natalie: So am I!
/ Black Betty: And now you're OUT. Which would you prefer, injection or GAS? http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040616 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley Winters and Natalie Durand are disguised as riverboat card sharps. Both are wearing false moustaches, wearing gambling hats, and Natalie is smoking a cigar. Black Betty looks sorely tempted by their offer.]]
/ Natalie: Good afternoon to you, madam.
/ Shelley: We're a couple of card sharps just died in a Mississippi riverboat crash. Do y'all happen to know where we can find a game in this pleasin' vicinity?
/ Black Betty: Well gentlemen, I'm not much of a player but I'd be glad to let you'm educate me. / [[At the card table, all the chips have drifted to Natalie.]]
/ Natalie: She is no player of cards at all!
/ Black Betty: Well now, I seem to have used up all my money. How about I raise you ONE SET OF TEETH. / Shelley Winters: I'm in!
/ Natalie Durand: So am I!
/ [[Black Betty lays down her hand and grins.]]
/ Black Betty: And now you're OUT. Which would you prefer, injection or GAS? http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040616 |
| Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison | [[Shelley Winters and Natalie Durand are disguised as riverboat card sharps. Both are wearing false moustaches, wearing gambling hats, and Natalie is smoking a cigar. Black Betty looks sorely tempted by their offer.]]
/ Natalie: Good afternoon to you, madam.
/ Shelley: We're a couple of card sharps just died in a Mississippi riverboat crash. Do y'all happen to know where we can find a game in this pleasin' vicinity?
/ Black Betty: Well gentlemen, I'm not much of a player but I'd be glad to let you'm educate me. / [[At the card table, all the chips have drifted to Natalie.]]
/ Natalie: She is no player of cards at all!
/ Black Betty: Well now, I seem to have used up all my money. How about I raise you ONE SET OF TEETH. / Shelley Winters: I'm in!
/ Natalie Durand: So am I!
/ [[Black Betty lays down her hand and grins.]]
/ Black Betty: And now you're OUT. Which would you prefer, injection or GAS? http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20040616 |
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