You're browsing the archives of Scary Go Round.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Ryan Beckwith: So Shelley, are you going to Oldbourne for good? / Shelley Winters: No no, that was just the rage talking. / Shelley Winters: Amy and I are powerful allies. I have to go see how she's getting on as a top lady of art! / Shelley Winters: She needs someone to keep her feet on the ground. / Ryan Beckwith: Yeah, praise can go to your head, or so I hear. I never achieved anything partic'ly praise-worthy. Guess that's why my woman left me. / Shelly Winters: Don't say that Ryan! There's a new lady for you, I know it. We need to keep your genes in the gene pool! / Ryan Beckwith: I donated plenty of genes in the last 90s. Kind of my gift to society. Sometimes I see a hairy baby thinkin' hard, and I just know.|
|Scary Go Round 20050830||[[Ryan hands Shelley a candy bar from the vending machine.]] / Ryan: So Shelley, are you going to Oldbourne for good? / Shelley: No no, that was just the rage talking. / Shelley: Amy and I are powerful allies. I have to go see how she's getting on as a top lady of art! / [[Batjew.]] / Shelley: She needs someone to keep her feet on the ground. / Ryan: Yeah, praise can go to your head, or so I hear. I never achieved anything partic'ly praise-worthy - guess that's why my woman left me. / Shelley: Don't say that, Ryan! There's a new lady for you, I know it! We need to keep your genes in the gene pool! / Ryan: I donated plenty of genes in the late 90s. Kind of my gift to society. Sometimes I see a hairy baby thinkin' hard, and I just know.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Shelley: Amy! It's been so long! / Amy: I'm sorry I didn't try very hard to look for you when you went missing, Shelley. / [[Amy's shirt: a battery below the word "Messthetics".]] / Amy: I know you would have looked for me. / Shelley: Adventurin' isn't your area, Ames. It's like how a cat won't fetch your slippers, no matter how much you whistle. But why did you leave Tackleford? / Amy: It's kind of a hell town! Haven't you noticed? / Amy: Parts of the A-Z are blacked out with a skull and crossbones on them. / Shelley: That's local character! You don't get that in Leeeeds! / Shelley: You can still get run over by a skellington in a taxi in Hull or Bradford. We're just pleasantly up-front about it!|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Shelley Winters: Gosh, this is, um, bijou, Amy. / Amy Chilton: Say it, Shelley. It's so tiny that they could get more money if it opened as a museum of the miniscule. / Shelley Winters: Ooh! I would pay to see that! Where's the bed? / Amy Chilton: It lives inside the wall. Like termites do. / Shelley Winters: How excitingly pre-war! / Shelley Winters: These are reduced circumstances for a lady such as yourself. Has your art career yet to catch-a-fire? / Amy Chilton: The toilet's down the corridor, Shel. If you lift the lid, you'll see my art career. / Shelley Winters: I think struggling is something artist have to do. It offsets the guilt later, you know? When they sell a smashed pie labelled "Death of a Party" for ten large.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Shelley Winters: Oldbourne certainly is lively at night. I thought it would be all tea dances and Ovaltine. / Amy Chilton: So did I. I thought I could live for five shillings a week in a rambling cottage. The old folks would mother me and the bohemians would lift me shoulder high. / Amy Chilton: But a month before I got her, this article appeared in Sc3nebitch Magazine. / Shelley Winters: Let's see, let's see. / Shelley Winters: Oldbourne: the New Shoreditch. Oh dear. / Amy Chilton: Oh dear is right, ninja. Oh (censored)ing dear. / Amy Chilton: You know how they say in a city you're never more than 20ft from a rat? Here, swap "rat" for "half-formed sitcom idea". / Shelley Winters: Ames, at the bar i... joined a band. They liked my look. "Fun loving spinster".|
|[[Amy and Shelley sitting outside a building]] / Shelley: Ames, what's so wrong with a town gettin' hip? People with asymmetrical haircuts need a place to go too. / Amy: I thought the same thing for the first two days. Then the excitement and fancy booze wore off. / Amy: Idiots in low slung pants are ruining Oldbourne for the indigenous old folks! / Shelley: That is muy tragic! / [[They enter a pub]] / Amy: How can you enjoy a pot of tea and a plain biscuit when Jimmy London is yammering into his mobile about "monged-out glitch techno". / Shelley: It would be ashes in your mouth. / Amy: Shel, now you're here we can do something. We'll form the Oldbourne Liberation front. The OLF. / Shelley: Yes. / Amy: But where do we start? / Shelley: You go to the bar. I shall continue to seethe.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||[[Amy is sitting up in bed.]] / Amy: Auughh. Agghhh. Agghhh. / Shelley: Oh, you're awake. Good. / Shelley: You can take what's left of my body to the hospital. / Amy: My head! This isn't funny! / Shelley: We overdid it. A bit. It's 2pm. / Shelley: I'd get dressed but moving hurts. / Shelley: Wow. It's like I took half a day outside and shot it. / Shelley: Six missed calls? I don't know this number. / [[Amy and Shelley are sitting at the table]] / Shelley: The five minutes after you wake up are the easiest. Things are about to get a lot worse. / Amy: Cheer up, baby Bukowski. / Shelley: Oh, I've been up an hour, things are levelling off. / Shelley: 25 minutes ago I was willing to convert to any religion that would heal me.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||[[Amy and Shelley are in the kitchen, holding plates of food.]]
/ Shelley: Are these cheesy eggs or some sort of shell flambe?
/ Shelley: Either way, I'm not totally sure they're going to cure me of the death shakes.
/ Amy: Whatever they are, they belong to the pungent librarian in 2F, so hush it up. / [[Cleaning up. Amy's t-shirt reads: 'I SHOT SUGE (sorry)']]
/ Shelley: Give me a bit of paper, Ames, I'm writing you a shopping list.
/ Shelley: You can't live on chocolate milk and dairylea triangles. / [[Shelley holds up a spotty piece of paper]]
/ Shelley: What is this? Is this from last night?
/ Shelley: Build fashionable nightclub, fill it with spiders. / Shelley: "Release demon beast, esp. kind that likes young flesh."
/ Amy: This is sinister! And that's my drunk handwriting! / [[Standing outside of the apt. Shelley's phone rings]]
|Scary Go Round 20050908||Shelley: Hello! Shelley Winters, lady writer and good kick-boxer. / Amy: Good good, quick thinking, good. / Lloyd: Shelley! It's Lloyd, from the Tiger Moth. Lloyd. Wondered if you'd had a chance to think over what we were talking about last night. / Shelley: Lloyd? / Amy: What does he sound like? / Shelley: Geriatric! / Shelley: Um, well, I thought maybe we ought to talk it over in person? Finalise some details? It's not... something to be taken lightly. / Lloyd: Why don't you come over to the Jolly Friar on Duke Street? I'll get the others over. Good, good. Good. / Shelley: We have two choices. We can go and face our terrors on Duke Street, or leave town. / Amy: I've bottomed out, Shel. Even terrors is a step up.|
|Scary Go Round 20050909||Shelley: The adrenaline rush of sheer fear has driven away my hangover. Maybe I was born to live on the edge. / Amy: No, you were born to live in a hedge. It's different. Half woman, half titmouse. / Amy: You go in first, edge-liver. / Shelley: My liver is on the edge. Individual lobules all weepin' at their mistreatment. / Lloyd: Girls, nice to see you. You look like you've just been dug up. I'll get you some chips. / Shelley: Oh thank goodness. Lloyd is just a nice old man who bought us too many drinks and wants to make amends! / Amy: Like a fake uncle. / Shelley: Thanks for the chips! / Lloyd: Well, I figured, you owe me £3000 already, I could let you off a couple of quid more.|
|Scary Go Round 20050912||Lloyd: What? You honestly don't remember? How drunk were you? / Shelley: I weigh about as much as an eggbox! Three babychams and I'm on the moon! / Lloyd: The phrase "high stakes domino match" doesn't mean anything to you? / Shelley: Only in the sense that I'm an accomplished English speaker. / Lloyd: Girls, by the end of the night you were three thousand in the hole to Oldbourne's Chip Shop proprietors. / Amy: Shelley, I believe these elderly gentlemen have taken liberties with our fragile, girlish constitutions. / Shelley: Yes, those shrivelled up cusses! / Another proprietor: I have a £3000 marker here. We the undersigned, promise to remove London media types from Oldbourne by the end of the week. / Amy: It's a good job we're super smart, Shel. / Shelley: Please don't let him see me crying. / [[Lloyd is hefting a box marked "Rat Meat".]]|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Shelley: There's only a week before the old folks extract their bony brand of justice. / Amy: We can't turn Oldbourne back into a sleepy Georgian town. We're just two idiots! And three grand might as well be a million quid when you don't have it. / Shelley: Wait. What did the dot com boom teach us? Terrible half-formed ideas lead to short-term big wins! / Shelley: Fetch me the local paper. / Amy: It may not be very clean. It's been helping with spills. / Shelley: Redhead stunner, 25 and likeminded sexy friend, 21, WLTM Internet burnouts... for friendship, conversation and maybe more! / Amy: What's the "more?" / Shelley: Intellectual theft disguised as the promise of make-outs!|
|Scary Go Round 20050914||Pistol: Come on, the ad says "Internet burnouts." These are going to be some fancy little geek girls. / Pistol: They'll be overwhelmed to meet two underground legends. / Steve: We DJ once a month. I don't know if that counts. / Pistol: What are you going to tell them? That we work on the wet fish counter in Tescos? / Steve: Well, I'm 50% fish, 50% cheese counter. / Pistol: That'll play. / Steve: Listen, cheese is important. People eat cheese more often than they go to the doctor's. / Steve: Stilton and Brie play a bigger role in people's lives than... Hollywood stuntmen. I'm sure you could make a similar case for haddock. / Pistol: I haven't had a sniff in months. I'm not telling a girl I spend my days boning kippers.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Pistol: There are only two things men fall out over, women and money. / Let's toss to see who gets first pick of these two. / Steve: All right, tails. / Pistol: @#!% / Steve: Right, I like Amy, with the tattoos. / You can have the skinny, dippy one. / Steve: Don't pull a face, Pistol. She's 60% leg, like a littel Thompson's gazelle. / Amy: What do you think? / Shelley: One has goggles, suggesting he is a man of the future. / The other is a civilised caveboy who may be able to help with any heavy lifting. / I smell success!|
|Scary Go Round 20050916||Shelley: Ames and I are excellent players of "the pool" due to our delinquent youths. / Steve: You were pretty bad, eh? / Amy: Tell him, Shel. / Shelley: One time, a friend stole a box of Flakes from an ice cream van, and I ate one! / Amy: So are you two really dot com burnouts like our ad said? / Pistol: Heh heh. Yeah. We had a company called ePotato.com. / Steve: We made a website that would tell you when the potatoes in your cupboard were turning green or growing tentacles. / Shelley: Useful! / Steve: But we burned through £8 million of venture capital in 10 months. / Amy: Wow! How? / Steve: Someone wanted to make the Queen Mother the face of ePotato.com. That was a thirsty old lady. / [[Shelley winks at Amy and makes the OK sign.]]|
|Scary Go Round 20050919||Steve: Are you all right, Shelley? / Shelley: Oh yes yes, I just have some problems that are... you know... b-b-botherin' me. / Steve: What kind of problems? / Shelley: Snif... well, Amy and I kind of... got tricked out of £3000 in a game of dominos. / Shelley: We're tryin' to think of a way to get it back. But I figure we should just take the consequences and spend the rest of the decade convalescing. / Steve: Pistol, we have to help these girls, they're in trouble. / Pistol: Steve? What? You can't turn our date into a Sunday of charity work. / Amy (sotto voce): They don't look very pleased with one another. / Shelley: Pinch me again, Ames. It's hard to cry when you want to clap and squeal.|
|Scary Go Round 20050920||Steve: All right. If you want that £3000, you're going to have to go back in and win it back. / Shelley: But they'll never let us back in there. They know we're skint. / Amy: And we might lose again. I don't think we're very good at dominos. / Steve: Girls, think about it. They got you drunk and you gambled like drunks. / Shelley: We reverted to terrible type. / Shelley: Well, maybe we can use the same tactics on them. / Amy: We can't get old men drunk. They're sumps! Booze silos! / Shelley: Old men have their own weaknesses. Model ships. Kit cars. Talkin' about the war. / Amy: Oh boy. You've tapped another rich seam of genius. / Amy: We'll spill some matches and suggest they build Westminster Abbey. High on glue fumes and scale modelling. They'll be anybody's.|
|Scary Go Round 20050921||Steve: I think we really helped those two, Pistol. / Pistol: Helped? HELPED? / Pistol: The only helping we should have been doing was "helping them out of those wet things." / Steve: Sometimes you have to be noble. / Pistol: Noble? There are parts of my anatomy I'll have to decommission soon. Tonight should have been a source of high fives for years to come. Years. / [[Shelley and Amy looking out the window.]] / Amy: Little Pistol's really hollering down there. I think we ruined his life. / Shelley: No no no no! / [[Shelley has put on an oversized bra over her shirt and filled it with one teddy bear each. Amy has a round gray wig and huge glasses, and is holding a pack of colored pens.]] / Shelley: It's a special day for them. A taste of honey is worse than none at all. But better than a mouthful of angry bees! What do you think? / Amy: Those'll convince. Now get a pen and draw on your varicose veins. The only question is how varicose is too varicose?|
|Scary Go Round 20050922||[[Shelley and Amy disguised as older ladies.]] / Shelley: OK Amy. Remember, stay in character. / Amy: Hey! I'm a pro. Plus, I've got a ton of tweed worsted on to remind me. / [[They hug.]] / Shelley: If this goes badly and we get thrown off the pier in concrete shoes, remember one thing. / Amy: What? / Shelley: Hell may be bad initially, but you can get used to anything given time. / Amy: You're evil, Shelley. Much more evil than I ever imagined. / Amy: Port and lemon please! / Shelley: I'll have a pink gin and... oh, is that a real piano? / Shelley and Amy: There'll be bluebirds over... the white cliffs of Dover... / Other chip shop man: Is that the sound of easy money, Lloyd? / Lloyd: Either that, or the terrorists are trying to kill us through their ears now.|
|Scary Go Round 20050923||[[Shelley, Amy, Earl, and Lloyd are playing dominoes. The men are getting more drinks. Shelley winks at them.]] / Earl: Lloyd, try to concentrate on your game. These old birds are taking us to the cleaners. / Lloyd: I think that Aggie's got her eye on me. I feel like I'm 19 again! / Shelley: So do go on, Earl. You were pinned down in a foxhole and the Luftwaffe were bearing down... / Amy: Aggie, I do believe we've one again. / Shelley: Well, boys, we've taken... gosh, quite a lot of your money here! / Amy: We really should be getting home to turn the electric blanket off. / [[As Shelley turns away, Lloyd grabs her arm, and her coat buttons pop.]] / Lloyd: Wait, Aggie, how about we arrange to meet- / Shelley: Hey! / [[Her coat falls open, revealing her slim figure and fake old-woman breasts.]] / Shelley: Uhhh... I can explain Lloyd. I work out... and... I've been in a lot of clinical trials.|
|Scary Go Round :: John's Tutorial #1||JOHN'S SOAPBOX / Welcome, true believer! Welcome to my pulse pounding, senses-shattering, downlight loopy guide to the business of making a comic on the internet using the "Adobe Illustrator" program! I think yoiu're going to get a kick out of some of this, whether you live in Felixstowe, Boston USA, or some far-flung colony in Guam! / Today I'm going to start with the business of writing. When you've been writing comics as long as I have, you get a sixth sense about what works, and what doesn't. If it works, somone probably did it already (probably "Cheers"). So just get stuck in and start making up all kinds of crazy things. / There's no "right" and "wrong" in writing comics. But do try to spell things correctly - make your mom and pop proud! / Excelsior! / John :) / The first thing to remember about writing is to look after your most valuable possession - your mind! It's no good sitting down to write comics when you're tired, stressed about a spelling bee or hungover from too many "grape sodas"! / Everyone starts with the same ten ideas for comic strips, but once they've gone, you need your body in tip top condition to dredge out the good stuff. Keep a notepad nearby to write your crummy ideas in - after all, a cake is almost totally composed of crumbs! / Sometimes ideas will sneak out when you're not trying to write comics - in emails, AIMs, CB chat etc. Keep a text file just for these bolt-from-the-blue nuggets! / If the magic isn't happening, have a nap. Your zany brain chemicals sort your jostling thoughts into some kind of order. Just don't sleep so long that you miss your dinner! / I like to write my comics in batches of five on refill pads. I don't always draw the panels out in full as I've done here but it often helps me along the way, as I don't have to come back to material and try to make up actions for a lot of wordy panels. / Writing strips in blocks of five helps get the juices flowing - the first is hard, but by the time I get to the fifth, I'm usually flying, and a sixth and seventh invariably mean I get a lie in next week. / Writing on paper forces you to have at least one drafting stage, rather than writing straight onto the computer. No one likes writing something out twice, but I'm lead to believe that this is the sort of thing professional writers do. / The refill pads will soon fill up with all kinds of bonus material in the margins that you can use later. Just go insane! / When I'm all done, I have a template set up in Illustrator to type the text into. Then I have a rest. / TOMORROW: CHARACTERS|
|Scary Go Round :: John's Tutorial #2||HOW TO DRAW COMICS the SCARY GO ROUND Way / Part 2: Characters / Welcome, back true believer! Today we're looking at how I put the characters on the comic pages you've read every day. The technique is a tricky one, so try to stay with me, every crazy step of the way!! / Adobe Illustrator is a tricky, fiddly beast, so like always, my process starts with a bit of paper and a trusty, crusty pen. There's no point of drawing on the computer if you can't draw in the real, human world. After all, you're not a robot! / Here's how attackin' Archie Stanwyck was brought to life. First I drew him from the side on, front-facing and 2/3 view, then I scanned the drawing and traced it in Illustrator. If a character's head isn't symmetrical, don't be cheap draw it from both sides. / You can get away when these three angles for 95% of things you want. / Drawing faces in Illustrator is a painful business, so I built up a library of heads for every occasion. I used to draw the bodies too, from the same three angles, but I think that was probably crazy behaviour. / I do almost all my Illustrator art using the pen tool to make curves. Drawing "freehand" with the pencil tool rarely has good results. I have a Wacom Tablet, but while it should be as close to real drawing as possible, it isn't. You can easily spot the Illustrator newcomer by their wobbly, unclosed frehand shapes. / The elasticity of a simple shape means you can render complex emotions if care is applied. / And the zoom function means you can render fine details of expression as if you were drawing at a vast size. / [[Examples of Shelley's facial expressions: Shock. Ecstacy. Knocked someone's hairpiece off while reaching for donut.]] / That's really all there is to say about that. / I still have two panels to fill. / BONUS FEATURE / "WHAT ARE YOU UP TO, LEN PICKERING?" / Len: Collecting seashells!|
|Scary Go Round :: John's Tutorial #3||HOW TO DRAW COMICS the Scary Go Round Way / Part 3: Comp'sition / Welcome, back true believer! I thought this would be a really easy way to fill a week, like those Kwak the Duck comics I used to do for Jeff Rowland, but it turns out: I was KWACKERS! Writing tutorials requires the commitment of at least 8% of your brain, and I still have more than halfway to go. / So, today, composition. Putting things in panels. How I draw people waving their arms about. Easy. I think. / Amy's voice: You aren't really my friend at all! / Shelley's voice: Of COURSE I am! If I wasn't your friend, I would padlock my pants drawer to prevent theft! / Here's a nude panel, with a couple of tempting dialogue balloons above. I know from my original scruffy sketches that Amy is saying one line and Shelley is saying the other. / There are two types of composition I use: fancy, and non-fancy. Fancy involves drawing the background first and making a nice job of it. Non-fancy involves putting the people in and filling in the space around them. Today we will be non-fancy. / First I work out the poses. I might draw in a bit of scenery first if it was important. / Then I draw the bodies in as outlines (I solidify parts if a picture is particularly complex). / I chop up the outlines with the knife tool and add on anything necessary, colouring as I go. / Amy: You aren't really my friend at all! / Shelley: Of COURSE I am! If I wasn't your friend, I would padlock my pants drawer to prevent theft! / Lastly I jam as much background as is strictly necessary into teh panel. Bish bosh, demystified!|
|Scary Go Round :: John's Tutorial #4||HOW TO DRAW COMICS the Scary Go Round Way / Part 4: Help me / It's day four, true believers! I've told you how to write comics without coming a-cropper, set up your characters, and lay out simple panels. Seems to me that that should be more than enough to get any young comic-maker up and running. But unfortunately, there are five days in the week and I am still on holiday. / Today: the art of fancy composition. A bit like those Calvin and Hobbes sunday strips that made Bill Watterson start getting big ideas about himself and talking a lot abo / Yesterday we made a panel with a profound sense of "that'll do" about it. There's no shame in underachievement: comic strips are about communicating an idea clearly. But with the screen as your canvas, you can be a bit more adventurous than Garfield gets on a weekday. / You can use photoreference to render realistic backgrounds. I'll be honest here, this is tracing. You can dress it up like little Jimmy on his 7th birthday, but what you've done is take a picture from Google Image search and copied it. / It takes a while to master, but if you choose your photo resources carefully enough, you can use them throughout a whole comic or in several without repeating panels or hurting composition. / Even if you're not very good at composition, tracing well composed photographs of buildings will help you get better. Eventually you'll knock out little bits of scenery yourself without needing help. / [[Book Cover: Gillian Butler / Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness and Werewolves / A self-help guide using Cognitive Behavioral Techniques / "Cognitive behavioral techniques are in my opinion, the most effective form of psychological therapy for emotional disorders." / -Dr. James Le Fonz, GP]] / Perspective adds dynamism and flair to your work. The more viciously acute the angle depicted, the closer you are to an Eisner award. If this is a problem area for you, I recommend getting a book about perspective.|
|Scary Go Round :: John's Tutorial #5||HOW TO DRAW COMICS the Scary Go Round Way / Part 5: Old Ways / Welcome back one last time, true believer! When I announced I was going to write this guide, a couple of people wrote and asked me if I'd take them through the way I draw with an old-fashioned pen. Since I've exhausted my Adobe Anecdotes, I might as well take you through the way I make comics in the tradtional sense. / I'm sure there won't be any surprises for old hands here, so I'll try to keep my observations pithy. Excelsior! / I write the comic the way I described in part 1, and lay the text out on one of my old Illustrator comic templates. That way I can see how much space the speech bubbles are going to take up. I print out the template full size on a sheet of A4 paper. / When I'm starting my drawing for the day, I always warm up a few sketches of the characters I'm going to be drawing. It helps me get my eye in, because I'm still rusty after all these years chained to the computer. Not physically though, I am not a man of iron or "Iron Man." / I try to keep my pencils neat, because I don't want to be thinking when I'm inking. Pencilling can be a little bit stressful to get right, so if something looks difficult, i try to work it out on a piece of scrap. / (I use a 0.5mm mechanical pencil, which was once used to kill a man in a war.) / I ink with a Fountain Pentel and a Tombow felt tip pen. For me, inking has to be quite restful, i don't want to be trying to work out which of a hundred scruffy pencil lines I'm meant to be drawing over. / You may ask why I used an overpriced important felt tip and a strange pen that on occasion proves impossible to fine in shops. Well, those are the pens used to sign the Magna Carta and the Declaration of Independence respectively. / Then I scan the comic at 300dpi as line art and colour it in Photoshop using the paint bucket. I keep a copy of the original linework on a layer just in case I damage it on my colouring layer like a jackass would. / I use the magic wand to select areas of colour and apply a slightly darker colour for a bit of shading with the pencil. I could go crazy doing this for hours but it's often lost in compressino so I just try to give the picture a bit of depth. / Finally I place the coloured image behind the speech bubbles I made in Illustrator, draw the pointy arros, tweak things a bit and put it on the internet. Then everybody claps and I win! / "Hurray!" / THE END|
|a class="searchlink" href="http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20051003">http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20051003||[untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!]|
|a class="searchlink" href="http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20051004">http://scarygoround.com/sgr/ar.php?date=20051004||[untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!]|
|Scary Go Round 20051005||[[Dawn, in a sleeper car.]] / Amy: It feels strange to be coming back to Tackleford. I thought I was going to be a big star. / Shelley: Well, it's five in the morning, so all the people who were going to come and laugh at you are still in bed. / Amy: They'll rue missing their chance. / Shelley: Amy, is that your dad? Did you make your poor dad get up to come pick us up? / Shelley: Len, I'm very sorry. No civilised human being should be up at this time. / Len: That's all right. / Len: If she calls in the night and I don't hear the words police, hospital, white slavery... / Shelley: Pregnant... werewolves! / Len: Yes. I really don't mind. / Amy: I'm glad you two find me so amusing! I guess I'll just raise my illegal Frankenstein baby alone.|
|Scary Go Round 20051006||[[In the laundromat.]] / Ryan: So the pair of you hightailed it out on the last boxcar? / Shelley: Yes! High, hilarious drama. / Shelley: But our gambling marker wasn't kosher. We were far too drunk to sign a contract. / Ryan: I always forget that you're a smart legal eagle. / Shelley: The old men extorting us were in breach of the Idiots with Money Act 1908. / Ryan: So why did you play along? / Shelley: It was a lot easier than telling Amy that living on £20 a week was kind of stupid and to come home. / Ryan: Shel, you should get back into the law game. You're wily. / Shelley: Law is hard and scary and interferes with watching my soaps. / Ryan: Dang. So drunk contracts don't count? If I'd known that, I could have saved the Merchant Navy lot of trouble. And by "trouble" I mean "seafaring vessels".|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||[[Ryan Beckwith and Shelley Winters are in a laundromat, washing clothes.]] / Ryan: SO THE PAIR OF YOU HIGHTAILED IT OUT ON THE LAST BOXCAR? / Shelley: YES! HIGH, HILARIOUS DRAMA / Shelley: BUT OUR GAMBLING MARKER WASN'T KOSHER, WE WERE FAR TOO DRUNK TO SIGN A CONTRACT. / Ryan: I ALWAYS FORGET THAT YOU'RE A SMART LEGAL EAGLE. / Shelley: THE OLD MEN EXTORTING US WERE IN BREACH OF THE IDIOTS WITH MONEY ACT 1908. / Ryan: SO WHY DID YOU PLAY ALONG? / Shelley: IT WAS A LOT EASIER THAN TELLING AMY THAT LIVING ON E20 A WEEK WAS KIND OF STUPID AND TO COME HOME. / Ryan: SHEL, YOU SHOULD GET BACK INTO THE LAW GAME. YOU'RE WILY. / Shelley: LAW IS HARD AND SCARY AND INTEREFRS WITH WATCHING MY SOAPS. / Ryan: DANG. SO DRUNK CONTRACTS DON'T COUNT? / Ryan: IF I'D KNOWN THAT, I COULD HAVE SAVED THE MERCHANT NAVY LOT OF TROUBLE. AND BY "TROUBLE" I MEAN "SEAFARING VESSELS".|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Ryan: Are you sure bringing Amy back to town was a good idea? / Ryan: That kind of restless spirit is hard to tame. / Shelley: Ryan, she was living like a poor little match girl. / Shelley: One who sells almost exclusively pre-burned matches. / Ryan: I don't know, Shelley. She was learning humility. You shouldn't interfere with humility. / Shelley: I s'pose... / [[Ryan imagines Old Man Humility, who is as described, and green, with a handlebar mustache]] / Ryan: Old Man Humility rides a buggy and teaches prideful folks to quit bein' so puffed up. / Ryan: He has an eyepatch and kind of a knobbly stick. / Shelley: I d-don't like the sound of him. / Ryan: He's a fearful sort, quiverin' and hollerin' in his buggy. / Ryan: The way to avoid him is by having absolutely nothing to be proud of. / Ryan: If all else fails, put on your old school uniform and turn up there late.|
|Scary Go Round 20051007||Ryan: Are you sure bringing Amy back to town was a good idea? That kind of restless spirit is hard to tame. / Shelley: Ryan, she was living like a poor little match girl. One who sells almost exclusively pre-burned matches. / Ryan: I don't know, Shelley. She was learning humility. You shouldn't interfere with humility. / Shelley: I s'pose... / [[Ryan imagines Old Man Humility, who is as described, and green, with a handlebar mustache]] / Ryan: Old Man Humility rides a buggy and teaches prideful folks to quit bein' so puffed up. He has an eyepatch and kind of a knobbly stick. / Shelley: I d-don't like the sound of him. / Ryan: He's a fearful sort, quiverin' and hollerin' in his buggy. The way to avoid him is by having absolutely nothing to be proud of. If all else fails, put on your old school uniform and turn up there late.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||[[Outside, on a farm.]] / Erin: It's nice to get a day off, but do you ever wonder what teachers do on "teacher training days". / Esther: I have... certain theories. / [[In a pig sty. Container of "dry feed" in the corner. Erin feeds the pigs.]] / Esther: The younger ones have crazy orgies, the older ones smoke pipes full of the wildest things. / Erin: Like what? / [[Pigs chomp down on the food, the girls watching.]] / Esther: Oh, ground up skulls, nettles, kind of a full-on search for enlightenment. / The day usually ends with them coaxing Mr. Pettifer off the roof. / Erin: He's a sensitive man! They shouldn't have made him smoke a whole box of chalks. / [[Outside again. A pentagram floats above Esther's hands. Erin locks the door.]] / Esther: But it's a secret thing. What happens on teacher training day... / ...*stays* on teacher training day... / Esther: The only reminders are crude tattoos and discarded pipes. / Erin: Plus deep-rooted, lasting shame.|
|Scary Go Round :: Monday-Friday Comic by John Allison||Erin: It's nice to get a day off, but do you ever wonder what teachers do on "teacher training days". / Esther: I have... certain theories. / Esther: The younger ones have crazy orgies, the older ones smoke pipes full of the wildest things. / Erin: Like what? / Esther: Oh, ground up skulls, nettles. Kind of a full-on search for enlightenment. The day usually ends with them coaxing Mr Pettifer off the roof. / Erin: He's a sensitive man! They shouldn't have made him smoke a whole box of chalks. / Esther: But it's a secret thing. What happens on teacher training day... stays on teacher training day... / Esther: The only reminders are crude tattoos and discarded pipes. / Erin: Plus deep-rooted, lasting shame.|
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 >>