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| Mistaken for Tourist | [[Dude stands on sidewalk]] / Dude: Still haven't been to the Empire State Building after almost five and a half years here... / Dude: Maybe I should swallow my New Yorker pride and just go already. / Smiley Guy: PAH-HAHAHA! TOURIST! / [[Dude looks horrified]] / [[Dude jumps on Smiley Guy]] / Dude: Mustn't...let...live! must...destroy...evidence!!! / Smiley Guy: HEY! / {{empire state building, tourist}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-26 |
| Time to Play Video Games | [[Dude sits at work computer]] / Coworker: Hey man, a bunch of the guys are getting drinks after work, wanna come? / Dude: Thanks, but I already have plans tonight. / Coworker: Oh ok that's cool. / [[Dude sits at home playing video games]] / Dude: Don't look at me like that, when you're an adult you need to make time to play video games. / {{work computer, social life, video games}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-27 |
| Photo - Brooklyn Botanical Gardens Japanese Garden Fish | [[Dude stands on rock looking down at fish in murky water of Brooklyn Botanical Gardens Japanese Garden]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, brooklyn botanical gardens, japanese garden, fish}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-28 |
| Photo - Prospect Park Lake | [[Dude sits by tree looking out at Prospect Park Lake]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, prospect park, lake}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-29 |
| Packing Airbags | [[Dude looks at box]] / Dude: Yay! My package finally arrived! / [[Dude opens box]] / Dude: Hmmm... / [[Dude takes out packing airbag]] / Dude: I always wondered what the factory that makes these packing airbags look like. / Caption: Elsewhere / [[Hapless workers being forced to blow airbags, one guy is almost unconscious, a slave driver whips them]] / Slave Driver: COME ON YOU MAGGOTS! BLOW HARDER! I WOULDN'T USE THESE TO PACK MARSHMALLOWS! / {{packing airbags}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-30 |
| Dropping Soda Bottles | [[Dude opens deli soda fridge]] / Dude: Mmmm...Ginger ale... / [[Dude drops bottle]] / < http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-05-31 |
| Preacher vs. Raving Lunatic | [[Dude looks at crowd of people watching raving lunatic as opposed to person preaching religion]] / Preacher: If you accept Jesus into your life your sins will be forgiven. I was once in trouble, but then I found Jesus and I repented my sins. All he asks of you is to repent and he shall... / Raving Lunatic: Garrra barbucha borama bokka poobarabopoh! Grezumabuba marumma bubba raurauba! / {{religion, preacher, crazy guy, raving lunatic}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-01 |
| Elevator Fart | [[Dude sits in elevator listening to his discman, one other guy stands next to him]] / Dude: [[thinking]] Oh no, I feel a fart coming on, why does this always happen in the quietest places? / Dude: [[thinking]] Okay, try to contain it, or at least suppress it long enough to- oh shoot. / Dude: [[thinking]] Oh geez, how loud was that? My music's so loud I don't even know if he could hear that or not. / Smiley Guy: Excuse me, did you-? / Dude: [[blurting]] HEAR ANYTHING? HAHAHA of course not! We're the only ones here, plus I have headphones on! / Smiley Guy: Actually, I thought I felt the elevator hit something maybe. / Dude: OH! HAH HAH HA! Right, I thought that exact same thing too! Haha! / Smiley Guy: oh, ok. / Smiley Guy: Or maybe your fart was just that loud. / {{elevator, fart, flatulence}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-02 |
| Shaving | [[Dude stands by bus stop, he has no beard]] / Dude: Mental note: if In the future my beard looks uneven, just leave it alone. / {{bus stop, shaving, beard}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-03 |
| Photo - Queens Chinatown Noodle Bowl | [[Dude sits inside giant bowl of noodles atop Chinese restaurant in Queens chinatown]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, queens chinatown, flushing, noodles, food}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-04 |
| Photo - Williamsburg Samurai | [[Dude looks up at Samurai Graffiti in Williamsburg]] / {{photo, outdoors, night, samurai, graffiti, williamsburg}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-05 |
| Videotaping Tourist | [[Guy plays guitar, a tourist videotapes him, Dude stands behind tourist]] / Dude: I'd suggest enjoying the show now because if you think anyone is going to watch that video ever again, including you, you're only kidding yourself. / {{street performer, video tape, tourist}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-06 |
| Fly | [[Dude sleeps at work computer desk, a fly buzzes around]] / [[Dude suddenly wakes up to smash fly]] / Dude: HAH! / < http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-07 |
| The 4400 | [[Dude looks at ad for "The 4400"]] / Ad: The 4400. ABDUCTED. RETURNED. CHANGED. / Dude: Wouldn't it be more efficient to change them after they've been abducted? / {{subway, 4400}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-08 |
| Emergency Devices | [[Dude looks at emergency door]] / Emergency Door: EMERGENCY EXIT ALARM WILL SOUND / [[Dude looks at fire alarm pull box]] / [[Dude looks at emergency break on subway]] / [[Dude stands by fire hose behind glass]] / Dude: There needs to be a museum where you're allowed to use these. / {{emergency exit, fire alarm, emergency break, emergency fire hose}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-09 |
| Friday 2 | [[Dude looks at calendar]] / Calendar: June 10 FRI / Dude: YOU! Why aren't you Saturday??? Be Saturday god dammit! / {{late night, lazy, friday}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-10 |
| Photo - Central Park Seeded Lawn | [[Dude and several other people lie down on grass area]] / Grass Area Sign: NEWLY SEEDED LAWN PLEASE KEEP OFF / {{photo, outdoors, day, central park}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-11 |
| Photo - Trump Building | [[Dude looks down from tree area of Trump Building]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, skyscraper, donald trump building}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-12 |
| Dead Roach 2 | [[Dude sees dead roach stomach up on ground]] / Dude: Hmmm, a dead roach. / [[Dude walks away]] / [[Dude storms in with sledgehammer]] / Dude: YAAAARRR!!! / [[Dude pummels roach into oblivion]] / Dude: AAAAHH!!! / < http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-13 |
| Citibank Says Thanks | [[Dude checks his mail]] / [[Dude reads mail]] / Mail: "You've embraced a really great card. So we'd like to return the favor." / Mail: "So we think you deserve a big hug." / [[Dude unfolds mail]] / [[Dude unfolds more to reveal paper hands on each side of unfolded letter]] / Mail: Instructions: 1. Wrap around torso 2. Feel warm and cozy / [[Dude looks up]] / Dude: This is so stupid. http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-14 |
| Summer Air Conditioning | [[Dude and group of people stand away from bus stop in favor of open doors of air conditioned Chinese restaurant]] / {{bus stop, summer, weather, heat, air conditioning, a/c}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-15 |
| Regal Entertainment 14 vs. UA Union Square | [[Dude on sidewalk, tourist approaches him]] / Tourist: Excuse me, which way is the Regal Entertainment 14 theater? / Dude: You mean the UA Union Square? / Tourist: Uh, no. Regal Entertainment. / Tourist: Regal Entertainment? / Dude: You mean the UA Union Square? / Tourist: Well, I guess I could go there instead. / Dude: It's just up this way a few blocks. / {{tourist, regal, united artists, ua union square}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-16 |
| Takeout Chinese Food | [[Dude walks to Takout Chinese food restaurant]] / Sign: Crazy Lucky Asian Eatery / Dude: Let's see, I'll have... / Sign: AMERICAN DISHES: Fried (4 PCS) Chicken, Fried Pork Chop, Fried Jumpo Shrimp (5), barbecued spare rib, chicken nugget (10) / Dude: Excuse me a sec, I need to check something. / [[Dude looks outside at restaurant's sign]] / Dude: Does the diner next door have Chinese dishes? / {{chinese food restaurant}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-17 |
| Photo - Queens Chinatown Busy Mall | [[Dude looks up at store called "Busy Mall"]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, queens, flushing chinatown}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-18 |
| Photo - Christ Baptist Church | [[Dude stands under CBC Banner]] / Banner: Committed to Christ and His Compassion since 1847 / Dude: I guess in 1846 they couldn't decide if it was worth committing to. / {{photo, outdoors, day, uptown, christ}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-19 |
| Wake Me Up Before you Go-Go | [[Dude sits on subway, guy with iPod sings]] / Singing Lunatic: You put the boom boom into my heart You send my soul sky high when your lovin’ starts. Jitterbug into my... / Dude: Excuse me, but do you realize you’re singing out loud? / Singing Lunatic: Yeah I know. / Singing Lunatic: My best friend told me what you did last night/Left me sleepin’ in my bed I was dreaming, but I should’ve... / Dude: Off key? / Singing Lunatic: Oh I always sing off key. / Singing Lunatic: Wake me up! Before you Go-Go Don’t leave me hanging like a yo-yo... / Dude: Can you, like, stop? / {{subway, apple ipod, wham}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-20 |
| Taking a Kid to the Movies | [[Dude stands at movie theater ticket window, a guy with his kid stands in front of him]] / Kid: Dad, can we see "Madagascar?" / Dad: Naw, we're gonna see something else. / Dad: Two for "Amityville Horror" / Kid: What's that? / Dude: Hey kid, close your eyes a sec / Kid: ok / [[Dude smacks his dad]] / < http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-21 |
| The Stench of Canal Street Q Subway Station | [[Dude stands on subway platform next to gas cloud]] / Dude: Hey. / Gas Cloud: Hey. / Dude: Who're you? / Gas Cloud: I'm the terrible smell of the Canal Street Q subway station. / Dude: Ah of course. I hadn't noticed you for a while. / Gas Cloud: Yeah, I have to work Summers mostly. / Dude: That must be rough. / Gas Cloud: It's a living. / Dude: So where do you even come from? / Gas Cloud: As a rule I don't answer that question. / Dude: fair enough. / Dude: Would you mind just floating over there? / Gas Cloud: Nah, I'm cool here. / {{subway, canal street q, stench, smell}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-22 |
| Bar Bouncer Knows Maths | [[Dude approaches bar]] / Bouncer: ID Please / [[Bouncer examines ID card]] / [[Bouncer continues to examine ID card]] / [[Bouncer still examining ID card]] / Dude: Want to borrow my calculator? / {{bar, bouncer, drinking age, ID}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-23 |
| Slow Day at Work | [[Dude's eyes glazed over at work computer]] / Dude: SOMETHING HAPPEN ALREADY DAMMIT!!! / Dude: What, are you all suddenly computer geniuses!? It’s not possible!!! / Dude: Come on! Just one question!? I’m sometimes surprised you people can feed yourselves! / Dude: YOU! You always have dumb questions. Need me to tell you the difference between a zip disk and a zip file again??? / {{work computer, tech support}} http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2005-06-24 |
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