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Convenient Lack of Continuity: Yourself 3 years from now [[Dude at job interview, sits in chair opposite interviewer]] / Interviewer: All right so thanks for coming this has been a great job interview. / Interviewer: All right, so I have just one more question... / Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in three years? / [[Dude gets out of chair]] / Dude: AAAARRGGHHH!!! / [[Dude grabs interviewer and noogies him]] / <> / [[Dude jumps on interviewer]] / <> / [[Dude whacks interviewer with chair]] / <> / Interviewer: All right. I'm guessing anger management. / {{lack of continuity, job interview, anger, violence, career}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-21
Man Eating Fish [[Dude at sea in a rowboat, there's a large piece of meat on a giant plate]] / Dude: What the hell? Oh wait, I remember that's the bait for the... / [[Behind the dude is an ENORMOUS fish thing]] / Dude: ...OH MY GOD! GIANT MAN-EATING FISH! / [[Fish thing opens its mouth, Dude paddles helplessly]] / Dude: What the hell is going on??? / [[Dude wakes up in bed]] / <> / Dude: *pant pant* Phew, that's a relief. / Dude: I'm always relieved when dreams aren't related to work. / Smiley Guy: My cupholder is broken. / {{dream, fantasy, fish, sea monster}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-22
Not Sitting [[Dude stands at work computer]] / [[Smiley guy looks at Dude]] / Smiley Guy: How come you're not sitting i- / Dude: Trust me, you don't wanna know. / [[Smiley Guy thinks]] / [[Smiley Guy thinks more]] / Smiley Guy: I don't care. What's th- / Dude: Enormous mosquito bite on my butt so it hurts to sit. / {{work computer, mosquito bite}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-23
Sharing a Gameboy [[Dude sits on subway, a brother and sister sit next to him playing a Gameboy]] / Brother: NO, you have to use the bombs here! / Brother: NO, you're doing it wrong! / Brother: Here, let me play the hard part. / Sister: How come you always get to play the hard part? I wanna play! / Brother: Hold on it'll just take a second. I'm almost done with this. / Brother: Actually this part is hard too, after I beat this guy then you can play. / [[Dude takes Gameboy from kid]] / <> / Brother: HEY! What're you doing?? / Dude: This part's too hard for you or your sister. / {{subway, nintendo, gameboy}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-24
Photo - Chinatown Parade 2006 [[Dude stands atop street sign watching chaotic Chinatown Parade]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, chinatown, chinese new year, parade}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-25
 
Photo - New York Comic Con 2006 [[Dude stands in Jacob Javitz Center]] / Dude: Curse you New York Comic Con. CURSE YOOUU!!!!! / {{photo, comic con, convention, comic books, javitz center}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-26
Lint Screen [[Dude stands at laundry dryer]] / Dude: Laundry, laundry laundry... / [[Dude opens door]] / <> / [[Dude takes out lint screen]] / <> / Dude: WHOO-HOO!! EASY TO SEPARATE FULL LINT SCREEN!! / [[Dude easily pulls off lint]] / <> / [[Dude tosses lint in trash]] / [[Dude looks at reader]] / [[Dude acts dumb and dizzy]] / Dude: UHHH...LAUNDRY??? VAAS IZ DIS??? DUUUUUHHH?? / {{laundry, self referential, meta}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-27
Change of Bagel Order [[Dude stands behind other customer in deli]] / Customer: I'll have a sesame bagel with vegetable cream cheese. / Dude: Toasted raisin bagel with cream cheese. / [[Deli worker cuts bagel]] / <> / [[Deli worker adds cream cheese]] / < / [[Deli worker wraps bagel]] / <> / Deli Worker: That'll b- / Customer: Actually change that to an onion bagel. / [[Dude whacks customer in back of the head, his head smashes into the display case]] / <> / <> / Customer: [[dizzy]] Actually, just add some lox to it and I'll be good. / {{deli, food, bagel, lox}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-02-28
1000TH COMIC!!! [[Dude stands in blank space]] / Dude: Welcome to Kick in the Head's 1000TH COMIC!!! / [[Dude walks onto first comic scene]] / Dude: Though this isn't the end I thought it appropriate to take a look back at the beginning. / Dude: First comic circa 3/23/03. Uhh, I guess I was skinny from being a starving film student. / [[Dude sits on park bench next to other dude with roach on leash]] / Dude: Plus I had lots of hair and um, a pet roach? Ew. / [[Dude on early comic subway]] / Dude: I guess the MTA was going through some budget cuts or something because the subways were pretty Spartan. / [[Dude on 7th avenue subway station photo next to taller Dude]] / Dude: I was pretty tall back then too, I guess I need to exercise more. / [[Dude on blank space]] / Dude: So thanks for sticking around for the past few years. There've certainly been a lot of changes since then. / Dude: I guess if the pattern of the past few years continues, I'll be shorter, balder, and fatter than I am now. / {{self referential, meta, 1000, roach, bus stop, photo, subway}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-01
Flyer Person Tactics [[Dude stands around corner of building from person handing out flyers]] / Dude: [[thinking]] Flyer person. In this situation one must minimize contact and perceived rudeness at all costs. / Dude: [[thinking]] Looks like they have the other side of the street covered, so I might as well pass here. / Dude: [[thinking]] All right. Wait until someone passes by, then as he's reloading I'll run by. / Dude: [[thinking]] That way it's his fault for not being fast enough, not mine for being rude. / [[A person approaches flyer person]] / Dude: [[thinking]] Here's my chance! / [[A second flyer person approaches Dude from behind, he doesn't notice]] / Dude: [[thinking]] One...Two... / {{flyers, sidewalk}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-02
 
Jesus Mastercard [[Dude stands in front of an apartment door with a Mastercard logo]] / Logo: GIVE Christ Charge OF YOUR LIFE / Dude: No / [[Dude leaves]] / [[Dude comes back]] / Dude: By the way this does in fact exist somewhere out there. / {{apartment, mastercard, jesus christ}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-03
Photo - Bowery Building Construction [[Dude stands in window of building under construction on Bowery]] / {{photo, outdoors, night, construction
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-04
Photo - Chinatown Ice Cream Factory vs. Nolita Ice Cream [[Dude stands outside Nolita Ice Cream]] / Dude: If you know what's good for you don't get your ice cream over here. / [[Dude stands outside Chinatown Ice Cream Factory]] / Dude: Get it here God dammit! / {{photo, outdoors, day, chinatown, ice cream, nolita}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-05
Academy Awards 2006 [[Dude sits at home watching the Oscars]] / TV: Hi and welcome to the 78th Academy Awards. / TV: And now a montage of epic theatrical films... / TV: ...which always look better on the BIG SCREEN. Makes you want to go to a MOVIE THEATER don't it? / TV: 'Cause you know, watching it home on video never beats watching it on the BIG SCREEN. Just me talking about it makes you want to right? / [[pause]] / TV: Donations for the Academy of Motion Pictures can be addressed to. / {{tv, television, oscars, academy awards, box office}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-06
Mouse Poop [[Dude stands in kitchen]] / I should probably give my kitchen a good cleaning. It's been a while now. / And what the heck are these little black things? / [[Dude picks up black thing]] / [[Mouse walks onto counter]] / [[Mouse leaves poops behind him]] / <> / [[Dude looks grossed out at him holding newly revealed mouse poop]] / {{kitchen, vermin, pest, poop}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-07
 
Keyhole Bacteria [[Dude approaches his apartment building #606. He carries a grocery bag]] / [[Dude reaches in a pocket for his keys]] / <> / [[Dude shakes his keys out]] / <> / [[Dude uses his mouth to select the proper key]] / [[Dude inserts key]] / Dude: Hold on a sec, I just put my mouth on my keys to retrieve the right one, and put it in the hole... / Dude: ...what if other people do this too? Doesn' that mean that every time I put my key in my mouth it's like my mouth is indirectly touching theirs? / Dude: Ew / {{apartment, keys, germs, bacteria}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-08
Siamese Pipe Butt [[A homeless guy sits on a siamese pipe, Dude walks by]] / Homeless Guy: Spare some change sir? / [[Dude walks away]] / [[Dude walks back]] / Dude: You've been here for a while, doesn't your butt hurt sitting on that? / Homeless Guy: Actually it hurts to sit anywhere else. / Dude: How's that? / Homeless Guy: Well... / [[Homeless guy sits up to reveal his butt is shaped like the siamese pipe]] / {{homeless, beggar, panhandler, siamese pipe}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-09
Tired [[Dude stands in blank space]] / Dude: I'M TIRED!!! / [[Dude asleep]] / <> / {{tired, late night, lazy}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-10
Photo - Quantum Torpedo [[Dude stands atop building pointing to the moon]] / Dude: HOLY CRAP! It's a Quantum Torpedo! / {{photo, night, outdoors, star trek, quantum, photon torpedo, deep space nine}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-11
Photo - Jacckie Chan [[Dude stands outside DVD store]] / Sign: Kung-Fu Center Bruce Lee Jacckie Chan Jet Li / {{photo, outdoors, uptown, DVD, engrish, jackie chan, let li, bruce lee}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-12
 
Bergen Bagels [[Dude stands in blank space holding paper bag to his head]] / Dude: Mmmm...oven warm bagel... / Dude: MMMmmmmmmmm.... / Dude: MMUUUUAAAHHHH... / [[Dude's face has been melted and skewed]] / Dude: ? / {{bagels}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-13
Sidewalk Harrassers [[Dude walks down the sidewalk]] / Jewish guy: Hey you Jewish? / Cell Phone Guy: Do you have a phone I can borrow for TWO seconds? / Panhandler: Hey, do you speak Engli- / Dude: HERE!!! / Panhandler: Oh, have I stopped you before? / Dude: Yes... / Panhandler: Thanks man. / Dude: No problem. / Scraggly Guy: Does that mean you're all out? / {{sidewalk, judaism, jewish, cell phone, panhandler, homeless, beggar, scraggly}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-14
Bread Aroma [[Dude walks down sidewalk, a scent wafts in the air]] / Oh my god that's the most amazing bread I've ever smelled! / Where's it coming from? Maybe a new bakery? / Holy Crap! I think it's just up ahead here! / [[Dude approaches door]] / IT'S HERE! What is this wonderous bread mecca? / [[Dude looks up, kind of disappointed]] / [[Dude facepalms]] / <> / [[Dude is standing at a Subway sandwich store]] / {{bread, bakery, food, smell, subway sandwich}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-15
Fastest Poop Ever [[Bathroom stalls occupied by two people]] / <> / Stall Guy: WHOO HOO! ALL RIGHT! / Stall Guy: That's one where you KNOW you're barely going to need to wipe at all! / [[Dude leaves his stall]] / Stall Guy: I mean there is NOTHING left up there if you know what I mean. / [[Dude is back at his work computer covering his face]] / Co-Worker: That was FAST! I thought you said you needed to take a hu- / Dude: Don't speak. / {{bathroom, poop, number two}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-16
Star Trek: First Contact DVD [[Handwritten script for a comic]] / Script: 1. Whoo hoo! Finally I have a copy of Star Trek: First Contact! / 2. I'll just watch a few scenes then finish my work for the night / 3. Actually, I'll watch this scene too. / 4. (later) Okay, so maybe I won't do my work for the rest of the night / [[Below are rough drawings for what would've been a comic]] / {{star trek the next generation, dvd, first contact, borg, meta, self referential}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-17
 
Photo - St. Partrick's Day 2006 [[Dude stands on street by 6th Ave and West 4th Street in West Village]] / {{photo, night, outdoors, street}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-18
Photo - West Side Highway 3 [[Dude stands atop stone structure nearby Javitz Center at West Side Highway]] / {{photo, outdoors, day, javitz, west side}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-19
New York Membership Revoked [[Dude walks towards subway entrance]] / [[Dude swipes metrocard]] / Turnstile: SWIPE AGAIN / [[Dude swipes again]] / Turnstile: SWIPE AGAIN / [[Dude getting irate swipes again]] / Turnstile: SWIPE AGAIN AT THIS TURNSTILE / [[Dude is horrified]] / Turnstile: JUST USED / [[Dude kneels in a corner crying, a person consoles him]] / Dude: WAAAAHHH!!! I'm no longer a New Yorker! / {{mta, metrocard, turnstile}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-20
Microsoft's New Killer Hardware [[Dude sits at work computer]] / All right let's see what the nerd news of the day is. / Oh geez, Microsoft is trying to beat the competition again. / Actually this one is finally making sense. / [[We see on his monitor the Slashdot.org article]] / Article: Microsoft to Construct Steve Jobs Killer / {{work, slashdot, microsoft, apple, bill gates, steve jobs}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-21
Spring Sucks [[Dude stands on subway platform about to sneeze]] / Dude: AAAAAHHHH!!! / Dude: CHOOOOO!!!! / <> / Dude: if this is what Spring is going to be then I wish it were still Winter. / {{subway, sickness, cold, spring, winter}}
http://kickinthehead.org/index.php?date=2006-03-22
 

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