You're browsing the archives of Evil Inc.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ show full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Dr. Muskiday: Ahhh, Lightning Lady! How are you?
/ Lightning Lady: Dr. Muskaday! Meet my boyfriend, Keagan. / Dr. Muskiday: Pleased to mee-Oooh! The vichyssoise! I've heard it's marvelous here! May I have a taste?
/ Keagan: Umm. I guess ... / Dr. Muskiday: Sip. / Dr. Muskiday: Yum! Sssip. Sssip. Sssip. / Keagan:... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051012.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | [["Chez Lex" sign on window in background]]
/ Keagan: Um, it is safe for a civilian to eat in here, isn't it?
/ Lightning Lady: Sure. Why? / Keagan: Well, they just rolled a diner out of here on a gurney. / Lightning Lady: That wasn't a diner, that was dinner. Those vampires are celebrating an anniversary.
/ Male... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051013.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Keagan [[to the maitre 'd]]: I know this establishment caters to supervillains, but I have a complaint! / [[Shot of Dr. Sivana seated in a booth]]
/ Keagan: That evil scientist has been staring at us since we were seated, smiling this annoying, half-smile. / Keagan: It's distracting ~ Him and his snotty,... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051014.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | [[Exterior shot of Chez Lex]]
/ Keagan: So. how's work, sweetie?
/ Lightning Lady: Not bad, but I *knew* I could be a good receptionist. / [[Return to restaurant interior]]
/ Lightning Lady: I just think I'm ready for a bigger challenge.
/ Keagan: Are you considering full-fledged villainy? / Lightning... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051015.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Mr. Nukkel: [[his eyes float in the air, next to Miss Match's desk. The rest of his body is nowhere to be seen.]] Well...have you come up with a scheme for Dr. Haynus?
/ Miss Match: [[looking around the room]] Huh? WHA-? / Mr. Nukkel: You heard me, Match.
/ Miss Match: I hate it when you do that. I designed... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051017.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Tank Engineer #1: We've had a set-back. Dr. Haynus doesn't have opposable thumbs, so he can't drive the tank.
/ Miss Match: Great! What am I supposed to tell my boss?
/ Tank Engineer #2: Don't worry! We found him a designated driver! / Dr. Haynus: *sigh* Now what?
/ Dr. Muskiday: I can't drive a stick... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051018.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Dr. Haynus: Ok, Muskiday, let's put this battle tank to the test.
/ Dr. Muskiday: Sure. Just as soon as I adjust the mirror and fasten my seatbelt. / Dr. Haynus: You're a Villain. Please act like it.
/ [[music playing on the tank's stereo, "~Popular! You're gonna be Pop-uuUU-LAR!~"]]
/ Dr. Haynus: Please... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051019.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Dr. Muskiday: We're travelling at a perfectly reasonable speed.
/ Dr. Haynus: We're getting passed by Octogenarians. / Dr. Muskiday: Maniacs.
/ Dr. Haynus: Floor it! / Dr. Muskiday: Okay. I'll put the hammer down...a little. / < http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051020.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Officer: Sixty-five in a thirty?! Where's the fire?
/ Dr. Muskiday: The wha-?
/ Dr. Haynus: The fire. FIRE! / Dr. Muskiday: Oh. No problem. [[Officer looks on as Dr. Muskiday fires a shell at his car.]] / Dr. Muskiday: The jerk gave us a ticket even after we produced a perfectly acceptable fire. http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051021.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Tank Engineer: They're bringing the tank back in.
/ Miss Match: But do they like it? / Voice: "One out of three ain't bad." [[Said as we see the tank being driven by Muskiday, as Dr. Haynus is being stuck outside the passenger window by his dog host-body...who is currently enjoying the breeze.]] http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051022.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Lightning Lady [[enters office]]: Good News, Sir! You know how you told me Dr. Haynus has been trying to unseat you as CEO?
/ Evil Atom: Yes? [[Mouths pencil eraser]] / Lightning Lady: It looks like he has a new obsession: Captain Heroic! He’s having Miss Match develop a plot to attack him. [[Evil Atom... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051024.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Lightning Lady: [[talking to a short lizard that's wearing a suit and tie]] I'm looking for Miss Match.
/ Lizard: She's on a smoking break. / Lightning Lady: Funny. I didn't have her pegged for a smoker.
/ Lizard: She's not / [[Miss Match is standing outside, in the middle of a group of people holding... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051025.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Lightning Lady: Miss Match, Evil Atom wants to see you in his office.
/ [[four guys standing near Miss Match]] Oooooooooooohhh! TROU~BLE! You're in TRU~BUULLLL! / Miss Match: Grow up, you guys! You make it sound like I'm being called to the Principal's office! / Miss Match: Let's hurry. I don't want... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051026.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Evil Atom: Miss Match, do you know why you're here?
/ Miss Match: If this is about the ghost employee, I don't know how that money keeps ending up in my bank account.
/ Evil Atom: Um...ghost employee?! / Miss Match: You...you didn't know?
/ Evil Atom: Heh. I know more than you think. We have lots of "ghosts"... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051027.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Miss Match: It's agreed. I'll make sure Dr. Haynus loses to Captain Heroic.
/ Evil Atom: No no no! That's not what I want! / Miss Match: Surely you don't want him to win!
/ Evil Atom: No, but his supervillain street cred goes up even if he loses! / Miss Match: No problem. When Haynus faces Heroic, I'll... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051028.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Lightning Lady: Evil Incorporated...How may I misdirect your call?
/ Caller: Are there any job openings there?
/ Lightning Lady: I can take your information, Mister... / Caller: AMAZO...I read minds...and Amazo is a perfectly good name for a psychic!
/ Lightning Lady: Wow! You ARE good! You read my mind! / Caller:... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051029.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | [[Nolan is working at his computer in his cubicle]]
/ Nolan: Always the last minute rush job in this place! They had the information for days, but suddenly this report has to be done in a half an hour! / [[Evil Atom starts passing by]]
/ Nolan: How am I going to this in ti- Oh no, Not him. Not now. / [[Evil... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051031.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Evil Atom: ...but that was before death rays were perfected. I ended up with some acute melancholy.
/ [[Nolan looks interested]]
/ Nolan:Hmm. Mmm-hmmm
/ Nolan:[[Thinking]] Please leave me alone. I have work to do. / Evil Atom: Melancholy. You kids don't get melancholy, do you. You probably get "bummers"... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051101.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Evil Atom: ...It's impossible to get spaghetti stains out of spandex. I mean, it ju...
/ Nolan: [[talking to himself]] He's been talking nonstop for twenty minutes. My report is due in ten minutes. / Nolan: [[talking to himself]] This is serious. I need to find a closure sentence. / Evil Atom: But that's... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051102.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Evil Atom: [[talking to himself in the background...]] I was inches from making my escape, and who jumps through the win...sidekick. It's...e sidekick.
/ Department Manager: Nolan! Where's that report?!
/ Nolan: I...um... / Evil Atom: I was just looking for you, Oculore. You know your department has the... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051103.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Oculore: FIRED?! You can't fire me because the report's not done!
/ Evil Atom: Your workers reflect your poor management. / Oculore: You haven't heard the last of me.
/ Nolan: Should I gather my personal belongings now?
/ Evil Atom: Definitely. / Evil Atom: And when you're done, take them to your former... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051104.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Lightning Lady: Evil, Inc., how may I misdirect your call? / Lightning Lady: I'm sorry to hear you've been on hold for an hour! I agree, it's completely unacceptable. / Lightning Lady: I'm going to connect you with the person in charge of the phone system so you can voice your complaint directly. / Lightning... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051105.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | [[A Man, 2-meter Earthworm, Robot, Alien, Vampire/Dracula, Pirate w/Parrot, and Devil gaze upon Lightning Lady and Miss Match as they walk down the all past cubicles. Each of the former with an appropriate cupid-shot-through heart metaphor visible.]]
/ [[To Lightning Lady.]] Miss Match: Maybe borrowing... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051107.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Iron Dragon: Hey, wait up! Do you remember me?
/ Miss Match: Should I? / Iron Dragon: Come on! How many guys do you stuff into vending machines when they act like jerks? / Miss Match: All of them. / Iron Dragon: You're the reason the Coke machine screams, aren't you? http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051108.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Man previously stuffed into vending machine: Listen, my name's Iron Dragon. I came on a little strong the first time we met and I'd like to apologize. I was just trying to stand out from all the other men.
/ Miss Match: Ok. / Iron Dragon: Great. I'd like to start all over...maybe over drinks at Chez... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051109.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Iron Dragon: I'm serious! I was way out of line the first time we met and I want to apologize!
/ Miss Match: I already accepted your apology. / Iron Dragon: Good. Cause I want us to be friends.
/ Miss Match: Friends it is. / Iron Dragon: And what could be nicer than having a drink with a friend?
/ Miss... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051110.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Iron Dragon: Excuse me. My name's Iron Dragon. You know Miss Match, right? You're friends? Does she ever mention me?
/ Lightning Lady: She mentioned what she'd love to do to you. / Iron Dragon: R-Really?
/ Lightning Lady: Yeah. She said she'd love to wipe that fratboy smirk off your face. / Iron Dragon:... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051111.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | [[There stands a restroom door. Affixed to the door is the universal stick figure of a man. To the right is another door, this time with the universal stick figure of a female. Miss Match is curently walking of that restroom, looking to the right at a third restroom, which sports a "stick figure" of... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051112.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | TV announcer: Wal-mart missed profit expectations ... / TV announcer: Fueling fears of an economic slowdown. / TV announcer: And high gas prices have hurt spending. / TV announcer: But there's one winner on Wall Street ... / TV announcer: Shares of Evil Inc. increased / TV announcer: ... a whomping... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051114.html |
| Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic | Dr. Haynus [[on phone]]: Atom! Is your tv on?
/ Evil Atom: It is ... and I'm appalled. / Dr. Haynus: This is an outrage!
/ Evil Atom [[over phone]]: It's atrocious! / Dr. Haynus [[on phone]]: You have to do something! This demands immediate action on your part!
/ Evil Atom: You're right! / Evil Atom:... http://evil-comic.com/archive/20051115.html |
Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80
81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100
101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120
121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140
141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160
161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180
181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200
201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220
221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240
241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 >>