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True Believers [[Cat is sitting in a dark closet wearing lederhosen.]] / [[Girl opens the door.]] / [[She walks into the closet and looks at Cat.]] / Cat: I'm waiting for polka's big comeback! / Girl: How long have you been in here? / Cat: What year is it? / Girl: 5769. / Cat: It's coming - I can feel it! / Girl:...
Cat and Girl Follow Up [[Dorothy sits on the beach. The sun shines down]] / [[Cat and Girl walk onto the beach. Girl is wearing a flotation device, and Cat is licking ice cream on a stick ]] / [[They approach Dorothy and stand.]] / [[Cat now no longer has his ice cream on a stick.]] / Dorothy: CRAZY. I went with CRAZY. / Girl:...
Cat and Girl Follow Up [[Dorothy sits on the beach. The sun shines down]] / [[Cat and Girl walk onto the beach. Girl is wearing a flotation device, and Cat is licking ice cream on a stick ]] / [[They approach Dorothy and stand.]] / [[Cat now no longer has his ice cream on a stick.]] / Dorothy: CRAZY. I went with CRAZY. / Girl:...
Cat and Girl Follow Up [[Dorothy sits on the beach. The sun shines down]] / [[Cat and Girl walk onto the beach. Girl is wearing a flotation device, and Cat is licking ice cream on a stick ]] / [[They approach Dorothy and stand.]] / [[Cat now no longer has his ice cream on a stick.]] / Dorothy: CRAZY. I went with CRAZY. / Girl:...
Cat and Girl ? Archive ? History Will Vindicate Cat and Girl girl: I quit. / cat: NO! / cat: If Harry Truman quit when things were tough / He never would have been president. / If the Flaming Lips quit when things got tough / They never would have made music that people actually like. / cat: If Henry Darger quit after a few years / No one would defend that crazy...
Real Estate B.C. [[A desert.]] / <> / [[Girl appears in the air wearing goggles and driving a little cart.]] / <> / [[Her cart crashes to earth.]] / [[Girl gets out and surveys her surroundings.]] / [[She sees Cat wearing a caveman outfit and carrying a club.]] / Girl: I come from the future. / Cat: I...
Warriors [[Cat and Girl sit on a couch watching television.]] / Girl: "The good fight." / Girl: Fight the "good" fight - / Cat: I am pretty sure the good fight is the one against static cling / Cat: but I might have the Protestant Reformation all wrong. / Girl: HOW? / Girl: Morality hasn't left the house since...
 
Monoculture's Last Dance [[Girl and Boy walk through a supermarket.]] / Music: Come on come on come on let me tell you what it's all about / [[Music drifts out to the street from a bar.]] / Music: fighting for your life inside a thriller - thriller - / [[Girl and Boy walk down the street.]] / Music from a car: Take a look at...
Any Port in a Storm [[Girl and Grrrl walk down a city street drinking shakes.]] / Girl: It's just another canon - / Girl: Just another hierarchy. / Girl: I am OVER the underground. / Girl: Being snobby about what music people like or what kind of bike they ride isnlt any better than caring about what jobs people have...
Pyramid Scheme Girl: It's one thing to subscribe to a hierarchy when you're part of its elite - / Girl: but we're no one's elite. / Girl: So why would we? / [[Cat and Girl look at each other.]] / [[Cat is in a college dorm room studying and wearing a preppy sweater.]] / [[Cat's at a kegger with other students...
Simulacra and Simulation [[Cat and Girl sit on a towel at the beach.]] / {{RING RING RING}} / [[Cat answers the phone.]] / Cat: Hello? / Girl: Ugh. / Cat: What? / Girl: That RINGTONE. / Girl: Let the death rattle of analog die away gracefully. / Girl: Instead of reanimating its corpse for a shambling, meaningless digital post-script. / Cat:...
Second Jobs [[Girl's Boogieman stands outside of a strip mall dressed as the Statue of Liberty, trying to hand out flyers.]] / [[He tries again.]] / [[He looks at his watch.]] / [[The Boogieman puts his shoes on in a locker room.]] / [[The Boogieman misses his bus.]] / {{CHK CHK CHK}} / [[The Boogieman swipes...
 
Gift Horse [[Cat and Girl walk into a mall.]] / [[A sign promises: "Your child's photograph taken with Wikipedia."]] / [[Girl stands by a thin man in a Santa Claus suit.]] / Wikipedia: And what are you looking for? / Girl: Questions. / Wikipedia: Questions, huh? / Girl: Because every question has an answer now...
Karaoke [[Girl stands in front of a curtain holding a microphone.]] / Girl: He sold more records than anyone else will ever sell. / Girl: He was the embodiment of global pop culture. / Girl: WAS / Girl: WAS the guy on the cover of Thriller- / Girl: In Captain Eo- / Girl: In Pepsi ads- / Girl: NOW he's...
Death on the Street [[Outside. Two houses are visible at a distance in the background. Girl is present, with a large ! over her head.]] / [[Enter Death, in sweatshirt and jeans. Girl is now smiling.]] / Girl: Where have YOU been hiding? / Death: Hi - / Death: Netflix. / Death: I mean - / Death: I've seen every episode of...
Death on the Street [[Outside. Two houses are visible at a distance in the background. Girl is present, with a large ! over her head.]] / [[Enter Death, in sweatshirt and jeans. Girl is now smiling.]] / Girl: Where have YOU been hiding? / Death: Hi - / Death: Netflix. / Death: I mean - / Death: I've seen every episode of...
Long Time Listener [[Girl is sitting at a desk writing on a piece of paper. Behind her is a radio supported on two filing cabinets.]] / <> / Radio: This is / Radio: NPR News / Radio: When you think of librarians you might think / Radio: of a lady with her hair in a bun and a finger to her lips / [[Girl...
What's Important Girl: A good supermarket not too far away. / Cat: Sunlight - clean clothes - burritos. / Girl: A society of sufficient comfort to allow the option of cultural engagement for all its members. / Cat: A warm bed in the winter. / Girl: Empathy - or at least pretend empathy. / Cat: An ice cold bed in the summer. / Girl:...
 
Spring Cleaning [[Cat and Girl are standing in a gloomy room.]] / Girl: I alphabetized my records by artist. / Cat: I alphabetized the spice rack. / Gil: I organized the DVDs by subject matter. / Cat: First pepper then salt. / Girl: I organized the nonfiction books by how many pages each has - / Cat: I organized my tax...
One Less Place to Visit Girl: We know people moment to moment. / Girl: We know them as their PRESENT - not the presents that have come and gone. / [[Cat and Girl walk by a cemetery.]] / Girl: But death transforms people. / Cat: Into what? / Girl: When they die their lives become something COMPLETED - a story with a beginning...
The Call of the Wild [[A bird sings in a tree.]] / Bird: Cheep / [[Cat and Girl come walking over the hill.]] / Bird: Cheep cheep / Cat: Hey! / Cat: That bird sounds like you. / Bird: I bemoan the loss of obscurity! / [[Girl looks at the bird.]] / Bird: {{music}} / Girl: You don't even remember obscurity. / Bird: No one...
Summer Plans Grrrl: Rock Camp. Cartoon College / Grrrl: There's a school for EVERYTHING. / Grrrl: What happened to the noble amateur emerging from the woods with three chords and a burning message? / Grrrl: What SCHOOL teaches you to have something to say? / Grrrl: Does EVERYONE have to be a professional? / Grrrl:...
Visions from the Future [[Grrrl, Girl, Boy at a bus stop observing groups of people passing by. They are dressed and propped as various trend representations]] / Grrrl: Let's never get old enough to talk about what we believe in the language of trends and marketing. / [[ Expressions of anguish ]] / Girl: Let's never get...
 
Mantra [[Girl and Grrrl stand at a bus stop.]] / Grrrl: We can take the uptown bus and transfer. Sent from my iphone. / [[Girl and Grrrl sit on a bus.]] / Grrrl: I was going to try and get to the beach but it hasn't stopped raining. Sent from my iphone. / [[Girl and Grrrl walk along a city street.]] / Grrrl:...
Redundancy Man Cat: Look what I made! / Girl: A pizza slicer. / Cat: I invented stone tools! / Girl: I hate to be the bearer of bad news - / Cat: LIAR. / Girl: But stone tools were invented about 2.5 million years ago. / Cat: You've got something better to do? / Girl: I wanted to go bird-watching on Friday. / Cat:...
Bad Decision Dinosaur on the Boardwalk [[Bad Decision Dinosaur is in the foreground with a camera, looking excitedly at passer-bys. In the background are signs for Fried Beer, Ham on a Stick, and Your Photo with Abraham Lincoln. An Abe Lincoln look-alike is wearing a top hat, dress jacket vest, bow tie and pants, and is leaning on his sign.]] / [[Abe,...
Hunters and Gatherers Girl: Everyone's looking for SUCCESS / Cat: like it's Waldo or something. / Girl: But what IS success? / Cat: Something in a sandwich that's not peanut butter. / Girl: Is it always comparative? / Cat: A wool sweater with your name on it. / Girl: For ME to succeed / Cat: People taking pictures of you / Cat:...
The Searchers Girl: What is success? / Cat: I saw it once! / Girl: Does it exist? / Cat: In the mirror - / Cat: I locked the bathroom door and turned the lights of and I spun around twelve times - / Cat: [eyes closed] And I closed my eyes and said / Whatever it takes / Whatever it takes / Cat: [eyes still closed]...
 
Antimalarial [[Girl and the Beatnik Vampire sit outdoors at a cafe.]] / Girl: If I'm a cog in society's machine for the manufacture of NOTHING / Girl: is my responsibility to the machine to function to the best of my ability / Girl: or to stop functioning completely. / Beatnik Vampire: How OLD are you? / Girl: I...
Dog Days Girl: There is one week a year / Girl: when anything that falls hits the ground without making a sound. / Girl: When everything is a repeat - even the news / Girl: and everyone is on vacation except for you. / [[Cat and Girl stand in an empty town.]] / [[They look around.]] / [[Cat smiles.]] / [[Cat...
Ain't No Sanity Clause Girl: Mavis Beacon / Girl: Mavis Beacon teaches trying / Girl: I always thought she was a real person. / Girl: Someone who had fought her way up in the world with her incredible typing skills. / Girl: Buying business clothes at Daffy's - pretending you're not eating lunch because you're busy - / Girl:...
Marketing Research [[Cat wears a blindfold. Girl is pouring liquid into cups marked 1 and 2.]] / Girl: Here's the first. / Cat: <> / Cat: <> Hmm / Cat: Sweet - tangy - uplifting. It makes me feel better about myself! / Girl: And the second. / Cat: <> / Cat: Flowery....
The Game of Life [[Cat and Girl sit at a table playing a board game.]] / Cat: Your whole family comes to your Bar Mitzvah - collect 500 dollars. / Girl: Get a job you hate - tell yourself it's temporary - lose one turn. / Girl: This game isn't anything like life. / Cat: You just don't like losing. / Cat: [[sings]] ...
 

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