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| Cat and Girl have Secrets | [[Girl is in her bedroom. Cat appears in the doorway.]]
/ Cat: Huh?
/ Girl: What? / Cat: I thought I heard something.
/ Girl: No. / [[Cat looks at her.]] / Cat: You're sure -
/ [[Girl throws her arms in the air.]]
/ Girl: Yes! / [[Girl turns away from him.]]
/ Cat: Well, I'll be in the living room if you want me.
/ Girl: Okay, but I won't. / [[Cat closes the door.]] / [[Girl lifts up the pillow on her bed. There are small figures beneath it.]] / [[Girl is playing with the figures.]]
/ Girl: I'm home! Where's my princess?
/ Girl: I've just put a roast on - dinner will be ready in half an hour.
/ Girl: I love you, Mommy and Daddy. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1464 |
| Girl versus Fashion | [[Girl and Grrrl stand outside. A guy walks by in an "Abercrombie and Fitch Co-Ed Softball" shirt.]] / [[A little girl walks by in a shirt that says "Punk."]]
/ Grrrl: Arrrgh! / [[A guy walks by in a "Pez" t-shirt.]] / [[A lady walks by wearing a "Rodeo Champ" shirt.]]
/ Girl: Doesn't anybody mean what they wear? / [[A girl's shirt says "...and all I got was this lousy tee-shirt."]] / [[A guy walks by in a button-down gas station shirt.]]
/ Grrrl: They're making a joke out of other peoples' lives! / [[A guy walks by in an "Avalanche Rescue Team" shirt.]] / [[A lady walks by in a "Rock Star" shirt.]]
/ Girl: The signifier and signified have been irrevocably separated. / Girl: Score one for post-modernism.
/ [[Cat holds three popsicles. He's wearing a Cat and Girl shirt.]]
/ Cat: Say again? http://catandgirl.com/?p=1466 |
| Cat and Girl's Star-Spangled Comics | [[Cat and Girl watch television.]]
/ Girl: "The Greatest Generation." / [[The television plays "Pearl Harbor."]]
/ Girl: "The Good War." / Girl: bah! / Girl: What about xenophobia so ridiculous that sauerkraut was called "victory cabbage?" / Girl: Doesn't anyone remember the internment camps? Where's their feel-good movie? / Girl: Just because the U.S. was fighting unimaginable evil - it didn't automatically make every action of ours one of pure good! / Cat: So? / Girl: So change the channel and quit hogging the afghan.
/ Cat: "Victory Blanket." http://catandgirl.com/?p=1468 |
| Cat and Girl's Star-Spangled Comics 2 | [[Cat and Girl walk down a city street.]] / Boy hawking newspapers: $! / Man hawking flags: $! / Man hawking American flag umbrellas: $! / Lady hawking flags with pictures of flags on them: $! / Guy hawking American flag bandanas: $! / Guy hawking "America Under Attack" shirts: $! / Lady hawking "I Survived the World Trade Center" shirts: $!
/ Girl: Cripes! / Girl: What about "I saw the World Trade Center collapse and all I got was this lousy fear and doubt and self-hatred?"
/ Cat: You don't have the nightmares? http://catandgirl.com/?p=1470 |
| Grrrl Adapts | [[Grrrl holds a guitar. A teddy bear sits behind a drum kit with sticks taped to its hands.]]
/ Grrrl: Let's try this again. / Grrrl: 1, 2... / Grrrl: 1! 2! 3! 4! / Grrrl: Well the modern world is not so bad / Grrrl: It's not like the students say / Grrrl: In fact I'd be in heaven if you'd share the modern world with me / Grrrl: We'd be in love with the USA now, we'd be in love with the modern world now
/ < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1472 |
| Cat Tells It Like It Will Be | Somewhere in the early 1990s...
/ [[Cat is talking to a group of small children.]]
/ Cat: Cute will be cool. / Cat: Wallet chains will look dumb. / Cat: Technology will cost less and coffee will cost more. / Cat: Micheal Jackson will marry Priscilla Presley. / Cat: Drew Barrymore will no longer be America's alcoholic Shirley Temple. / Cat: The year 2000 will give computers an opportunity to depose their human overlords but, sadly, they will not take advantage of it. / Cat: cough. / Cat: Yes - question? / Kid: Will there be los of large anthropomorphic cats in the future?
/ Cat: A couple dozen. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1474 |
| Cat and Girl Settle In | In the early 1990s...
/ Girl: I'm beginning to like it here. / Girl: A time before ubiquitous high-priced coffee stands.
/ Lady: High priced coffee stands... / Girl: Before swing was cool.
/ Punk: Swing? Cool! / Girl: Before Yuppies moved back to the city and drove rent prices up.
/ Lady with gym bag: Maybe it is time to move back. / Girl: Before the government stripped away the last of the New Deal and gave up on nationalized health care entirely.
/ Man in suit: Hmm... / [[Girl looks over.]] / Girl: Gee, I sure hope there won't be growing anti-corporate sentiment among youth! / Guy: Hey - that is a pretty good idea. / Girl: Well, score one for our side.
/ [[The guy looks up. A piano is about to fall on him.]] http://catandgirl.com/?p=1476 |
| Cat and Girl versus Cat | In the early 1990s
/ [[Cat is wearing a flannel shirt and a watch cap.]] / [[Girl and Cat (dressed normally) sit at outdoor table.]]
/ Cat: Check out that loser. / Cat: Oh, hey, look at me! I'm so grunge. / [[A kid comes up to Grunge Cat with what looks like a pizza box.]]
/ Grunge Cat: It's been more than 30 minutes.
/ Cat: I'm a big stupid head! / [[A baby peeks is head out of the pizza box.]]
/ Grunge Cat: This baby should be free.
/ Cat: I think I'm so great.
/ Delivery Kid: Hey, man. / Delivery Kid: I got stuck in traffic. Give me a break.
/ Grunge Cat: Did you say something? / Cat: I said you're a big stupid loser head.
/ Grunge Cat: Takes one to know one. / < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1478 |
| Go Home, Cat and Girl | In the early 1990s...
/ Cat: Looks like the Time Travel Train doesn't make local stops on weekends. / Girl: I think we can take the uptown express to 2525 and transfer to a local downtown train. / [[Grrrl spots Cat and Girl reading the service announcements.]] / Grrrl: Hey, what's up? / Cat: We, um...
/ Girl: We're lost. How do we get to 2001? / Grrrl: I'm heading there right now. Just follow me. / Girl: Do you spend a lot of time in the 90s?
/ Grrrl: I live here. / Girl: But we go to school in 2001.
/ Grrrl: I commute. / Grrrl: Rent's a lot cheaper in the past. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1480 |
| Cat and Girl put the Kettle on | [[Girl and Boy are playing cards.]]
/ < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1482 |
| Boy at the Beach | ONE DAY
/ Bodybuilder: Ha Ha
/ [[A bodybuilder kicks sand in boy's face at the beach. Girl looks on.]] / Boy: My eyes are burning.
/ Girl: I'll pack up. / LATER
/ [[Ad for an "Indie Pop Starter Kit."]] / Boy: Hmmmm... / EVEN LATER
/ [[There's a package for Boy in his mailbox.]]
/ Boy: Oh boy! / [[Boy opens the box.]]
/ Boy: A striped sweater... / Boy: Funny looking glasses... / [[Boy holds scissors.]]
/ Boy: I can give myself a bad haircut! / Boy: And an anorak! / LATER STILL
/ [[Boy sits at the beach wearing his new sweater and glasses.]] / < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1484 |
| Cat and Girl do Laundry | [[A kite.]] / [[Laundry hangs on the kite string.]] / [[Cat and Girl are flying the kite from a hot air balloon.]] / [[The balloon's basket is filled with soapy water, and Cat is scrubbing his back with a brush.]] / [[Girl sits in an inner tube.]] / [[They fly over mountains.]] / [[They fly over a beach.]] / [[They fly over a city.]] / [[They fly over a village.]] / [[Cat empties a jug of bleach into the water. Girl looks down.]]
/ Girl: A lot of people have bangs. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1486 |
| Cat and Girl drive the Conversation | Cat: I said, how's your novel going? / [[Girl is driving a scooter. Cat sits behind her.]]
/ Girl: I'm dissatisfied with them form. / Girl: I don't like culture I can't engage with.
/ Cat: And you're sure you're old enough to drive. / Girl: Do you think it's possible for a novel to create a dialogue with its audience? / Girl: Live music works because both performer and audience can change in response to the other. / Girl: Movies can at least see audience response, even if they can't respond to it.
/ Cat: eep. / Girl: But how can printed matter interact meaningfully with its readers? / Cat: You're driving dangerously close to metacommentary.
/ Girl: I know where I'm going.
/ [[Girl's bumper sticker says "My Other Car is a Pynchon Novel."]] http://catandgirl.com/?p=1488 |
| Cat makes Lunch | [[Cat sits at a table holding a sandwich. He is imagining himself eating the sandwich.]] / [[He holds the sandwich up to his mouth.]]
/ < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1490 |
| The Creation of Cat and Girl: Part 1 | [[A photograph of a woman sorting through cards.]] / [[Beakers and flasks and tubes.]] / [[A man checks up on giant rolling spindles.]] / [[A map of the United States is studded with lights.]] / [[A man draws out plans while sitting on a giant piece of paper.]] / [[A woman is putting rats under a microscope.]] / [[A man makes a phone call from a complicated piece of machinery.]] / Cat: Isn't that how sausage is made?
/ Girl: Same basic machinery. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1492 |
| The Creation of Cat and Girl: Part 2 | [[The ocean.]] / [[The sun is rising.]] / [[Girl comes to shore on the back of a turtle.]] / [[She walks onto the beach.]] / [[A fish is caught in one of her socks.]] / Fish: 3 / [[Girl has an idea.]] / [[A shack on chicken feet runs toward Girl, a hammer in its hand.]] / [[The hammer comes down on Girl's head.]] / [[Girls head splits open and a hand emerges.]] / [[Cat crawls out of Girl's head.]] / [[Cat wipes off his goggles.]] / [[Cat and Girl sit at a table.]]
/ Girl: You're out of your mind.
/ Cat: I'm out of your mind. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1494 |
| The Creation of Cat and Girl: Part 3 | [[Cat and Girl are seated in an airplane.]] / [[A fire erupts at the back of the plane.]] / [[Cat and Girl throw their hands up.]] / < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1496 |
| Girl's Class Reunion | Girl: Sigh. / Cat: How'd the reunion go?
/ Girl: Well... / Classmate: I started at Citibank just out of Kindergarten.
/ Classmate: I'm attending a pre-med elementary school.
/ Classmate: You like this? My boyfriend got it for me.
/ Classmate: What are you doing? / Girl: I, uh, went to see the world's largest Ceasar salad. / Classmate: Any plans for the summer?
/ Classmate: I might take a day off in July and reorganize my closet.
/ Classmate: I was thinking of going to the Hamptons and reorganizing a closet there. / [[Girl huddles in a blanket, holding an empty mug.]]
/ Girl: They're so deadened to the world that life makes sense to them. / Girl: I've never felt so road less traveled. / [[Cat pours tea into Girl's mug.]]
/ Girl: Sign. / Girl: I don't know. / Cat: You need a drink.
/ Girl: I need a drink. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1498 |
| Cat and Girl name the Band | [[Grrrl holds a guitar and Girl has a drum. Cat has fallen asleep next to his keyboard.]]
/ Girl: The Low Numbers? / Grrrl: The Monopods? / Cat: Cheesequake. / Girl: The Dead Wrongs? / Grrrl: The Right Turns? / Cat: ...Cheesequake... / Girl: Slim and the Chances? / Grrrl: Straight and the Narrows? / Cat: ...cheeeeesequaaaake... / Girl: The Elastic Snaps? / Grrrl: The Elastic Snaps.
/ Cat: huh? / Grrrl: I like it.
/ Cat: I just had the most wonderful dream. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1500 |
| Cat and Girl versus the Fourth Wall | < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1502 |
| Cat and Girl sell Babies for Profit | [[Cat holds up a baby, a large stamp in his other hand. Girl is looking through a box of identical babies.]] / Girl: Do you ever think about the ethical issues? / [[Cat looks over at her.]] / Cat: If selling babies for profit is wrong, I don't want to be right. / [[Cat places the baby on a giant pile of babies.]] / Girl: But we don't really need this money.
/ Cat: Do you want to go to a state college? / [[Girl considers.]] / [[She hands Cat another baby.]] / Girl: Shut up and pass the babies.
/ Cat: I didn't think so. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1504 |
| Frederick Wiseman presents Cat and Girl | [[Cat and Girl consider a Parcheesi board.]] / Cat: Did you feel kinda sick this morning? / [[Cat and Girl consider a Parcheesi board.]] / Girl: We probably should have boiled those potatoes longer. / [[Cat and Girl consider a Parcheesi board.]] / [[Girl rolls the dice.]] / [[Cat and Girl consider a Parcheesi board.]] / Girl: Well, this is about as much fun as reading Proust. Is anything on TV? http://catandgirl.com/?p=1506 |
| Death visits Cat and Girl | [[Girl sits on the kitchen floor dangling a piece of string in front of a cat.]] / [[Cat comes in for coffee.]] / Cat: Oh - you're still here? / Girl: I put an ad in the paper. No one's claimed her yet. / [[Girl holds the cat.]] / < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1508 |
| Cat and Girl learn the True Meaning of Winter | [[Snow! Cat and Girl run outside. Cat carries a toboggan.]] / [[Girl makes a snowman who looks like Cat. Cat frowns.]] / [[Cat and Girl shovel their driveway.]] / [[Girl makes a snow angel while Cat pees his name in the snow.]] / [[Cat and Girl have built snow forts.]] / [[Girl throws a snowball at cat.]]
/ Cat: It's really cold outside. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1510 |
| Cat and Girl hit the Big Time | [[Cat, Girl and Grrrl have band practice in a garage.]]
/ Cat: I wanna see The Elastic Snaps in letters four feet tall.
/ Grrrl: 1, 2, 3, 4! / Grrrl: I said I wanna go to / Grrrl: Atlantis, lost to history
/ Beatnik Vampire: Hey, that sounds pretty cool. / Death: Neat!
/ [[A crowd gathers.]]
/ Grrrl: I said why don't you show me / Grrrl: to where the fauna frolic free
/ Beatnik Vampire: Sellouts. / Grrrl: But they took me to Seaworld
/ Girl: Eating paint can kill you.
/ Cat: I don't have a problem. / Grrrl: I can't work like this.
/ Girl: This band is over.
/ Cat: I quit. / [[The crowd leaves.]] / Grrrl: Reunion tour?
/ Cat: I wanna see The Elastic Starship in letters four feet tall. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1512 |
| Cat and Girl meet the Other | [[Girl opens her front door. A short blob of matter sits on her doorstep.]] / Girl: Can I help you?
/ Other: You crazy mammals! / Cat: Hey, it's the Other! / Girl: The Other?
/ Other: You sassy bipeds! / Cat: We went to school together. / Other: I'll never understand you omnivores.
/ Girl: You didn't go to school. / Cat: Did I say school? I meant jail.
/ Girl: Does it do anything besides react? / Other: Aaaaaaaaah!
/ [[The Other melts into a puddle.]] / Cat: I picked the wrong day to wear felt shoes.
/ Other: Gah. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1514 |
| Cat and Girl's Final Televised Concert | Girl: ...and we'll be visited by some of our old favorites - Boy, Dog, Grrrl, Bea Arthur - / [[Cat comes form behind a curtain wearing a straw hat and holding a cigar in his mouth.]]
/ Cat: Hey, Girl! I just bought a baseball team.
/ Girl: I didn't know you liked baseball. / Cat: Don't you want to know who's on the team?
/ Girl: Yeah, I guess so. / Cat: Ask me who's on first.
/ Girl: Who's on first? / Cat: Joseph Beuys.
/ Girl: Hoo's on... / Cat: Joseph Beuys.
/ Girl: I know that. You're telling the joke wrong. / Cat: That's what it says on my cards.
/ Girl: Who wrote those? This material is terrible. / Cat: They handed me these cards.
/ Girl: Forget it. If you want me I'll be in my trailer. / [[Cat stands alone on stage.]] / Cat: Memories / Cat: ...light the corners of my mind...
/ Audience member: I can't believe you wasted five dollars on these seats. http://catandgirl.com/?p=1516 |
| Cat puts things in his Pipe and Smokes Them | [[Cat walks outside smoking his pipe.]] / [[He puts a flower in his pipe.]] / [[He puts a newspaper in his pipe.]] / [[He gets a hot dog from a stand and puts that in his pipe, adding some mustard to it.]] / [[He puts the hot dog stand's umbrella in his pipe. A crowd begins to gather.]] / [[Cat puts a beatnik's beret into his pipe.]] / [[Cat puts Magritte's "The Treachery of Images" in his pipe.]] / [[Cat puts a crying baby in his pipe.]] / [[Cat is at home with Girl.]]
/ Cat: And then the police came and they let me pee into a cup! http://catandgirl.com/?p=1518 |
| Cat and Girl and the 4 Cheerleaders of the Apocalypse | [[Cat and Girl sit in the bleachers. Girl holds a pennant and Cat eats a hot dog.]] / [[They are surrounded by insects.]] / [[Frogs rain down on them.]] / Cheerleaders: Alright! Let's Go! / Cheerleader: We're not losers we're not sore! Let's fight alright this is war! / Cheerleader: Nothing really satisfies like when the opposing quarterback dies! / Cheerleader: Scramble hard! Scramble quick! Kick their asses till they're sick! / Cheerleader: Play football like you're Brett Favre! Beat them back and starve starve starve! / Cheerleaders: Woooooooo! / [[The Marching Band of the Apocalypse plays.]] / Cheerleader: Fight!
/ Cheerleader: Kill!
/ Cheerleader: I never should've given it up.
/ Cheerleader: Half a tic tac? http://catandgirl.com/?p=1520 |
| Cat and Girl versus Nostalgia | [[Cat and Girl walk up out of a subway exit.]]
/ Girl: The city seems dirtier than usual. / [[They look around.]]
/ Cat: Oh no, not again.
/ Girl: You don't think - / < http://catandgirl.com/?p=1522 |
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