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| Two Lumps | [[Mom is standing in the kitchen while Snooch rolls on his side at her feet]]
/ Mom: Snooch, I'm doing dishes! I can't pet you right now!
/ Snooch: MOW MOW MEER MOW MOW MEER / [[Snooch is now on his back at Mom's feet]]
/ Mom: My hands are soapy! I can't... OK, FINE!
/ Snooch: MOW MOW MEER MOW MOW MEER / [[Snooch... http://twolumps.net/d/20080530.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer is sitting on the couch, watching Snooch race past it]]
/ Mom off panel: DAMN IT SNOOCH!
/ Snooch: Dude, what's her problem??
/ Eben: Just an idea, but you might want to quit hairballing on her new carpet. / [[Snooch ducks behind the couch]]
/ Snooch: Then where should I? Oh, how about this heating... http://twolumps.net/d/20080602.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch walking into frame, Eben washing himself.]]
/ Snooch: Yay! I found the best hairball hiding place EVAR IN THE WORLD!
/ Ebenezer: I told you already: Mom's Shoe. / Snooch: She'd find THAT right away and be all mad. No, I got SMART!
/ Ebenezer: I'd pay to see that. / Snooch: I put it down the... http://twolumps.net/d/20080604.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Phone rings: Ring a ding ding]]
/ Ebenezer: Hmm. Why the heck not? / [[Ebenezer knocks phone over]]
/ Phone: This is a recorded message from your political candidate! For English, say "Yes." For Spanish, say "Si..."
/ Ebenezer: Meer / [[Ebenezer continues to stares at phone]]
/ Phone: Meow! Mrow mow... http://twolumps.net/d/20080606.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer approaches Snooch, who is staring at the TV]]
/ Eben: You're a sports fan?
/ Snooch: I wanna be a mascot.
/ Eben: Why? / Snooch: Look at them! They're huge! They must get fed all the time!
/ Eben: There's actually a human inside there.
/ Snooch: Well, duh.
/ Eben: Oh. My apologies. / Snooch: I... http://twolumps.net/d/20080609.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snootch has brought a yellow support bracelet and has it at his feet. He is sitting proudly looking at Ebenezer who is on the left hand side of the panel. Eben meanwhile is looking down skeptically at the band at Snooch's feet.]]
/ Ebenezer: What've you got there?
/ Snooch: One-a them support bracelets!
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080611.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snootch has brought a yellow support bracelet and has it at his feet. He is sitting proudly looking at Ebenezer who is on the left hand side of the panel. Eben meanwhile is looking down skeptically at the band at Snooch's feet.]]
/ Ebenezer: What've you got there?
/ Snooch: One-a them support bracelets!
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080611.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch sits smiling, a white poofy chef's hat on his head jauntily covering one ear. With one paw, Snooch pushes a lightly steaming cup of liquid towards Eben, who is walking towards Snooch and looking at the proffered cup with narrowed eyes]]
/ Snooch: Eben! I invented something! I call it "S"!
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080613.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch sits smiling, a white poofy chef's hat on his head jauntily covering one ear. With one paw, Snooch pushes a lightly steaming cup of liquid towards Eben, who is walking towards Snooch and looking at the proffered cup with narrowed eyes]]
/ Snooch: Eben! I invented something! I call it "S"!
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080613.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Today's strip is set up comic strip style--three panels on top of three more panels. Top panel 1 has a grinning Snooch waving his front paws]]
/ Snooch: HEY BENNY! What's a PRECEDENT? / [[Top panel 2: close-up of Snooch's face with the text VOCABULARY TIME!]] / [[Top panel 3: Snooch stands up towering... http://twolumps.net/d/20080616.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch is crouched wide-eyed over an open book]]
/ Snooch: Tyger! Tyger! Burning bright, In the forests of the night, What immortal hand or eye Could frame thy fearful symmetry? / [[Zoom in to Snooch looking up in deep thought]] / [[Ebenezer sits looking at Snooch, who is sitting next to a box of... http://twolumps.net/d/20080618.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch is crouched wide-eyed over an open book]]
/ Snooch: Tyger! Tyger! Burning bright, In the forests of the night, What immortal hand or eye Could frame thy fearful symmetry? / [[Zoom in to Snooch looking up in deep thought]] / [[Ebenezer sits looking at Snooch, who is sitting next to a box of... http://twolumps.net/d/20080618.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer approaches Snooch, who is wearing a backwards ballcap, sunglasses, a cellphone on a yellow neck chain, and a black and yellow bracelet]]
/ Ebenezer: Ye gods, now what?
/ Snooch: Got some new bling, y'all. / Ebenezer: That's not bling. That's Mom's old cell phone.
/ Snooch: Goes bling when I... http://twolumps.net/d/20080620.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are watching television; Snooch looks slightly disturbed]]
/ Announcer: ...AND THUS IS THE CIRCLE OF LIFE COMPLETED...
/ Snooch: Huh. We didn't come out of Mom, did we?
/ Ebenezer: Seeing as we're not in the Guinness Book, no. / [[Snooch looks at Ebenezer, curious as he strikes a... http://twolumps.net/d/20080623.html |
| Two Lumps | Superscript: FLASHBACK
/ [[Kitten Snooch and Ebeneezer in a cage at the kennel; Snooch appears to be just waking up, while Ebeneezer is awake and alert]]
/ Snooch: Whuh... Where are we?
/ Ebeneezer: Good, you're finally awake. Now we can proceed... / [[Snooch starts freaking out]]
/ Snooch: WHAT's THIS... http://twolumps.net/d/20080625.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch seems calmer now]]
/ Snooch: So what's going on?
/ Ebeneezer: We've been selected to be part of the glorious Kittens' Krusade!
/ Snooch: But what IS that? / Ebeneezer: We've been selected by the high cat council as stealth warriors! We'll be adopted by a human, then we work our way into their... http://twolumps.net/d/20080627.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Kitten Ebeneezer and Snooch in the cage]]
/ Snooch: Awesome! So what's the plan?
/ Ebeneezer: First, get someone to adopt us by engaging the Stare of Cute.
/ Snooch: What's that? / [[Ebeneezer gives the most nauseatingly adorable cute stare possible]] / [[Snooch looks impressed]]
/ Snooch: DUDE!
/ Ebeneezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080630.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch watches as Ebeneezer strikes a dramatic pose]]
/ Ebeneezer: [[singing]] The cage of the pet shop is made of cold steel,
/ The kitties, they yearn to be free!
/ But somewhere awaits a tin can for our meal,
/ The Gooshy belongs to me! / O Kitten Krusade, we will conquer the land,
/ We soldiers of... http://twolumps.net/d/20080702.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch and Ebeneezer in a pet carrier in Mom's car]]
/ Snooch: AUGH! I'M BLIND!
/ Ebeneezer: No, we're in a pet carrier. / Snooch: AUGH! WE'VE BEEN ABDUCTED!!!
/ Ebeneezer: No, we've been ADOPTED. Soon our unit will be poised to strike! / [[The carrier rattles violently as Snooch struggles with something]]
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080704.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebeneezer and Snooch in Mom's house; Ebeneezer doesn't look too well]]
/ Ebeneezer: Our new home. Excellent, time to formulate a plan.
/ Snooch: Dang, this place is huge. / Ebeneezer: It's advantageous that we look nearly identical, so we can cause confusion. Just lose that goofy grin... urgh.
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080707.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Continuing arc of flashback to their kitten days. Snooch is sitting on the floor looking up at Ebenezer, wrapped up in a blanket, on the couch]]
/ Snooch: You doin' OK?
/ Eben: Yeah, just a little infection. Our new "Mom" is feeding me baby food until I recover.
/ Snooch: What's that? / Eben: It's kind... http://twolumps.net/d/20080709.html |
| Two Lumps | Continuing arc of flashback to the cats in their kitten days. Mom is holding Snooch, getting ready to put him on the couch next to Ebenezer, who is wrapped up in a blanket]]
/ Mom: Poor lil guys. I'm glad you're eating at least.
/ Snooch: Moan. Groan. Etc. / [[Both kittens are on the couch]]
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080711.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Conclusion to continuing arc of flashback to the cats as kittens. Snooch and Ebenezer are staring at the TV. Text above first panel: TEN YEARS LATER...]]
/ Snooch: So these people onna news are gettin' arrested for polly... polly-gammy?
/ Eben: Verily. / Snooch: I don't get it.
/ Eben: What part? The... http://twolumps.net/d/20080714.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Eben (hunched and annoyed) and Snooch (perky and smiling) sit next to each other in matching plaid kitty coats.]] / Ebenezer: Tartan wool coats in Texas Summer. Gramma's gone completely insane.
/ Snooch: At least there's a cool trick we can do in 'em!
/ Ebenezer: Oh? do tell.
/ Snooch: Lick your belly!... http://twolumps.net/d/20080716.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are watching TV]]
/ Voice on TV: Many "purebred" dogs have congenital problems, ranging from hip dysplasia and heart weakness... / [[Close-up of Eben and Snooch, whose eyes are bugged out]]
/ Voice on TV: ...to spontaneous eyeball displacement...
/ Snooch: ZOMG!!!1! BENNY... did we... / Eben:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080718.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer approaches Snooch, who is sprawled on the floor surrounded by several glasses and a puddle of liquid]]
/ Snooch: Skeeddley deedley bop!
/ Eben: What in the name of maritime law did you do now? / Snooch: Sposeda drink 8 glasses awater aday!
/ Eben: That's not water.
/ Snooch: A cuppa ice izza... http://twolumps.net/d/20080721.html |
| Two Lumps | [Snooch and Ebeneezer are sitting in front of an open window, where what appears to be dandelion seeds float in on the breeze]
/ Snooch: Dandelion seeds!
/ Ebeneezer: Actually, those are baby spiders. / [Snooch is now wide-eyed with shock, while Ebeneezer examines one of the "spiders"]
/ Snooch: WHAT
/ Ebeneezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080723.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Line of text: JULY 24th-27th BOOTH #2003]] / [[Art and text box: Representation of San Diego Comic-Con International logo with eyeball, followed by text: Comic-Con 2008 San Diego Convention Center on top of a blue and gray striped background]] / [[Text paragraph: With: Punch an' Pie,... http://twolumps.net/d/20080724.html |
| Two Lumps | [Snooch is still sitting by the open window from before, except now it's sunset, and some of the dandelion seeds have settled onto him.] / [Now it's nighttime, and Snooch has some more dandelion seeds on him] / [Ebeneezer is now standing by Snooch]
/ Ebeneezer: *ahem* If you keep sitting there like... http://twolumps.net/d/20080725.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer approaches Snooch, who is angrily chewing on a cable]]
/ Snooch: GRRRR!
/ Eben: We have dental floss, you know.
/ Snooch: I DESTROY IN PROTEST! / Eben: What did the internet do now?
/ Snooch: No, the cable! It's made of CATS!
/ Eben: First off, CAT-5 isn't made of cats. / < http://twolumps.net/d/20080728.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer is reading from a letter to a disgruntled Snooch]]
/ Ebenezer: Fiddlesticks! Seems we're due for our Senior Feline checkup again.
/ Snooch: We're still too young, dag nabbit! They're fulla bunk! I'll find a way to fool 'em! / [[Snooch is reading on the computer < |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer approaches Snooch, who is watching TV]]
/ Ebenezer: What's on the tube, Butternut?
/ Snooch: It's the story of the Elephant Man! / [[Snooch is dressed in a brown Indian outfit and a red/orange/tan feathered headdress, Ebenezer is wearing a pink/burgundy/brown/tan western shirt with a bolo tie... http://twolumps.net/d/20080801.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch is bending to the side while wearing a football helmet and completely covered in a football jersey with the number 78 on it]] / [[Ebenezer watches Snooch kick a back paw in the air]] / [[Ebenezer leaves as Snooch turns in the other direction and kicks his other back paw in the air]]
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20080804.html |
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