You're browsing the archives of diesel sweeties.
You can search these comics too.

show: [ show full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]

diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Charles; {{to Pete dressed as Lando Calrissian}} Lando, you sure are one smooth Mamma Jamma! / Pete; {{to Charles dressed as Han Solo(?)}} Hells, yes! All the fine ladies wanna visit my gas mines! / Charles; All of them? / Charles; Even your girlfriend? The one over there sitting on top of that big...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Suzie; {{to Steve dressed as Adam}} Not even if I was the last woman on Earth? / Suzie's snake; <> / Steve; {{to Suzie dressed as Eve}} Depends. Are we married? / Suzie; Ok, what if I was the first woman on Earth? / Steve; That explains these 'costumes'... Very sneaky!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Grandpa; {{dressed as Mummy, to Roger dressed as ghost and Johnny dressed as witch}} Witch! Mummy! Ghost! We are the classics! / Grandpa; {{Johnny's hat is on fire. Roger leaves quickly}} Though I am unsure how wise it was for a toaster to wear a cloth hat.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Maura; {{sitting on the pot, drinking beer, talking on the phone}} Yup, I fired him. It'll be porno re-runs until we replace him. / Maura; But we'll be ok. Ooop! Excuse me one second. / <> / Maura; Can I send a shout out ot my homeboys beans and rice? Word up!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Lil' Sis is lying in bed, under the covers and in the dark]] / Lil' Sis: I am never gonna leave this room. / Lil' Sis: Not to eat. Not even to pee. / Lil' Sis: I need nothing but the air and a crate of edible diapers.
 
talka talka talk pete: clango, why are you /such/ a stupid dungus? / pete: jeez, why would anyone build a robot and not make it smart? / clango: i'm not dumb pete... it's [that you] you feel ins[ecure and] enjoy picking on people different than you. / pete: {{interrupting}} tra la la la la la! / {{n/t}}
funky nepotism maura: it's a business and i have to run it as such! / lil' sis: oh, come on! i'm your sister and i want a new job. / maura: sorry, but guys just don't pay to see girls with square nipples. / lil sis: {{square text bubble}} they are not square!
jealous bottoms nipples: you can't let fear control you, clango / nipples: when something makes you stressed, it's best to admit it and take power away from it! / clango: i'm jealous of all hu-mans because i will never be able to try taking it in the rump. / nipples: ♥
manna red robot: curses! it's so cold out tonight, there's no one to bludgeon. / kitten: mew? / red robot: did my groin just squeak? / kitten: mew? / red robot: just like helpless shivering manna from a heaven i have no reason to believe in!
overcompensating meal clango: i miss my kitty so much that i'm seeing apparitions! / clango: i wish i knew why he took off and where he went. / clango: i may as well console myself with food. / {{n/t}} [[clango, dressed as ronald mcdonald, looks sadly at smiling happy meal box. golden arches and "McDonalds" logo on window...
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Red Robot #C-63: OK, vulnerable kitty! Are you ready for some atomic warmth? / Roger the Cat: Mew? / Red Robot #C-63: Enter and be warm! I feel a kinship with you, feral one. / Red Robot #C-63: Trapped in a land run by hu-mans, your wild murderous urges curtailed unfairly! Bah! / Red Robot #C-63:...
workin the funnybook farm {{not sure about character's name -- blonde female / marketing droid}} / blonde female / marketing droidwow! comic book sales tripled! / they started going up right after we took the big boobie posters out of the window and hired a female clerk. / holy menstrual cycles, bat-neil! / could... could /girls/...
early lil' sis: hey, boss. / boss: whoa! you're early today. / lil' sis: eh, i got nothing else going on... figured i might as well come in. / boss: ha! / boss: not the first time i've heard /that/ in a comic book store.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Indie Rock Pete: Hey Fatty-Tum! Did someone install new eating software on your hard drive? Ha! / Indie Rock Pete: Is it corpulence 3.0? Chubster: Gold Edition? See-Food Diet XP? Ha! / Indie Rock Pete: How can someone metal get fat, anyway? / Metal Steve: Not all of us exercise regularl...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[No Lights]] / <> / <> / Ooh / <> / [[No Lights]] / <> / <> / <> / Unnnh! Yee-Ha! / [[Maura and Clango In Bed. Crumbs on duvet.]] / Maura: Satisfying as always. / Maura: But why is there a garlic bread under the pillow?
 
Bacon-Geddon [[Roger the cat is sleeping]] / Roger: zzz / [[Smell is wafting toward Roger, who wakes up]] / Red Robot: Roger! I bring you death! Destruction! Famine! Vittles! / Roger: Prr? / [[Roger heads towards smell]] / Red Robot: Consume to live! Death is life! / [[Red Robot with apron and bacon]] / Red Robot:...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Clango is fat]] / Clango: Robot double 'Bango'! What is the meaning of this insubordination! / Bango: What seems to be the problem, sir? / Clango: As my robot double, don't you think you should look more like me? Well? / Clango: Maximize taco input immediately or be destroyed!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Fat Clango stares at Johnny Toaster]] / Clango: Give it up, toaster! / [[Johnny Toaster emits smoke]] / Clango: Please! Dear God, I need my carbs!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Electron Mike: And while I find that the latest D.J. MILF album is inherently transgenerational... / Electron Mike: It certainly lacks the mono-mythical operaticism of their earlier recordings. / Electron Mike: They sure cut some sweet vinyl when they were known as the 'Oedipus Suplex'. / Lil' Sis:...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Electron Mike listens to his stereo system with headphones]] / Pale Suzie: Ew, I don't think I'd ever date another audiophile. They're too anal! Too rigid! / Lil' Sis: Stiffness has its place, my dear Suzie. / Electron Mike: !
 
Fat and Unhappy [[Clango speaks to Maura while holding an ice cream sundae. Clango is obese.]] / Clango: I ain't going on no diet! / Clango: I am fat and depressed and I like it! / Clango: I gots mad doldrums- So step off, yo! / Clango smiles, covered in hot fudge.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Electron Mike: Beep boop beep! / <> / Electron Mike: Beep beep boop zeep click! / Electron Mike: It's like a love song written by a fax machine.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Red Robot #C-63 and Roger the Cat are at Red Robot #C-63's house. Red Robot #C-63 is standing next to a table, upon which Roger the Cat is perched]] / Red Robot #C-63: Hey kitty! Who's a good kitty? YES YOU ARE! / Red Robot #C-63: Who wants to go destroy Earth with Daddy? / Red Robot #C-63: Hooray!...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete is carrying a cardboard moving box taped closed, and looks happy]] / Indie Rock Pete: All da fly-ass honeys better get jet packs! / Indie Rock Pete: 'Cuz Indie Rock Pete is moving outta Mom's basement and right up into the PENTHOUSE! / Indie Rock Pete: Right above 'FISH, CHIPS AND...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Doc Cunningham strips off Clango's extra mass with a blowtorch.]] / Doc Cunningham: Feel the burn, you once and former fatty!
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete carries a box into his new apartment.]] / Indie Rock Pete: My first apartment! / Indie Rock Pete: So sexy! So 'spacious!' / Indie Rock Pete: Boxes are like furniture, just more indie.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Ha ha! Let's stomp on another dog! / / Kitty, why did you poop in my chest? / I thought we were best friends.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Indie Rock Pete: Hanukkah used to be so cool. / Indie Rock Pete: I used to confound all the stupid gentile kids by chucking chocolate gold coins at them. / Indie Rock Pete: Now it just sucks on Xmas' fat weiner and it's just about the presents. / Indie Rock Pete: Bah! Not even the most tastiest of...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Lil' Sis: He's tidy, tall, trim & a tease. / Lil' Sis: ...also rather fastidious, meticulous and rather exacting. / Lil' Sis: Are his hands big enough to make up for his lack of a sense of humor? / Electron Mike: I wonder if she likes Thai food?
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Metal Steve: Oh boy! I have electric mail! / Email: Dear Steve: While you were off being moral, I got busy with your girlfriend at Taco Bell! / Email: I don't know her name, but I do know how she tastes with hot sauce. She is my picante ho! / Email: Your arch-foe, Doctor Weiner. PS: Ha ha ha! / Metal...
A Foe Revealed STEVE: Oh boy! I have electric mail! / CPU: DONG! / E-MAIL: Dear Steve: While you were off being moral, I got busy with your girlfriend at Taco Bell! / E-MAIL: I don't know her name, but I do know how she tastes with hot sauce. She is my picante ho! / E-MAIL: Your arch-foe, Doctor Weiner. PS: Ha...
 

Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 >>