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God IS a Gateway Drug: diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve and Eve face off]] / Metal Steve: Cool tattoo! / Eve: It's not a tattoo. / [[Metal Steve looks surprised]] / Eve: It's a Jesus patch. I'm trying to quit / Metal Steve: Me too! It's an expensive habit. / Eve: What do you do with your hands now that you don't pray? / Metal Steve: Umm...[[smiles]] / Eve:...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic pete: what the hell are you eating? / suzie: veggie burger with bacon. the best sandwich ever! / pete: that's stupid! / suzie: stupidly delicious! / suzie: unless you're all racist against us baco-vegetarians. / pete: bacon is a vegetable? / suzie: bacon is a vegetable. / clango: i'm a mammal! milk's...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic {{Title: Clique and Clack}} / {{Previously, Clango ran into Pale Suzie and Indie Rock Pete at a diner.]] / Clango: Hey guys! Can I be a vegetarian too? / Clango: I've even got my own broccoli! / [[Excited, waves broccoli]] / Pale Suzie: I dunno, man. Do you even need to eat? / Indie Rock Pete: Feh. / Clango:...
Time Slows When Terror Looms : diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve and Lil Sis face off]] / Lil Sis: All aboard the train of fun! / Metal Steve: Toot! Toot! / Lil Sis: If you insist [[turns away from Metal Steve]] / [[Background goes green]] / Metal Steve: ! / [[Lil Sis winks]] / Lil Sis: Hold on, give me another second. / Metal Steve {{from off stage...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Roger the cat: <> / Puppet Clango: Roogggeerr! Why are you such a bad kitty? / Roger the cat: !!! / Puppet Clango: Why did you sleep on my chest and steal the breath out of me? / Puppet Clango: Now that I am a ghost, I cannot feed you anymore! / Clango: Puppets are even more fun than karaoke! / Maura:...
 
Seeing Each Other or Just Hallucinating Indie Rock Pete: So, are we dating again? / Goth Suzie: Nope. / Indie Rock Pete: Maybe seeing each other? / Goth Suzie: Oops, lost my glasses. / Indie Rock Pete: Screwing around? / Goth Suzie: Screwing up, maybe? / Indie Rock Pete: Are you using me for my body? / Goth Suzie: Spin it 'till ya win it.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete talking to Pale Suzie]] / Indie Rock Pete: How about you come over tonight & visit my special huggin' and kissin' couch? / Indie Rock Pete: It really misses you. / Pale Suzie: That couch is gross! It has holes in it. / [[Pale Suzie is backing away slowly]] / Indie Rock Pete: It's all...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic {{Title: Clango Versus Fair Play}} / Indie Rock Pete: I don't have any friends. / Clango: That's because you act like a cranky elitist! / [[Pause, Pete glares at a smiling Clango]] / Indie Rock Pete: That's where you're supposed to say "But I'm your friend, Pete!" / Clango: I would, but I thought...
The Murder Hole Indie Rock Pete: This is what I've been reduced to. / Indie Rock Pete: Hanging out alone by the murder hole. / Indie Rock Pete: Waiting for either a keg party or a killer to come and put me out of my misery. / Indie Rock Pete: Is that a train?
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete is standing by the entrance to a tunnel. Red Robot is infront of the tunnel]] / Indie Rock Pete: eek! / Red Robot: Hey you! Get out of my yard! / Red Robot: Can't a 'man' butcher his murder victims in the privacy of his own abandoned tunnel? / Red Robot: Now git before I call the sherrif! / [[Shot...
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve is sitting in front of a red iMac, which has smoke coming out of the screen]] / Metal Steve: Oh, fudgie budgies. / [[Metal Steve goes to talk to Clango]] / Metal Steve: Clango, how do you quit the bomb game on a mac? / Metal Steve: I gotta write a paper and I can't get this stupid game...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve talking to Maura]] / Metal Steve: Can I borrow a laptop so I can write a paper? / Metal Steve: My computer broke and I'm kind of- / Maura: What's in it for me? / Metal Steve: I'll be your Best Friend Forever!!! / Maura: "B-F-F," Eh? That and a B.F.A. will get me a job at starbucks. / [[No...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve sitting in front of a laptop]] / Metal Steve: Maura, how do you change the desktop on this computer? / Maura: (offscreen) !!! / [[Maura comes on]] / Maura: Don't! You'll break it! / Metal Steve: I can't concentrate with a naked picture of me on the screen. / [[Lil' Sis comes in]] / Lil'...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Uncle Grandpa, Jon Stamos, Roger the Cat, Johnny Toaster and 2nd generation iMac are sitting on a table]] / Uncle Grandpa: I have called you all here to mark the passing of a dear old friend. / Uncle Grandpa: Let us have a moment of silence for Red iMac. (Not that you guys can actually talk) / [[2nd...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Drip coffee maker brewing on counter.]] / Electron Mike: HOW DO YOU GUYS TAKE YOUR COFFEE? / Metal Steve: PARTLY CLOUDY WITH 100% CHANCE OF DELICIOUSNESSS. / Pale Suzie: BLACKER THAN THE PANTS IN MANHATTAN. / Electron Mike: FASHION MODEL PANTS OR GOTH KID PANTS? / Pale Suzie: HMM, AM I FEELING SNUG AND...
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Clango talking on his own]] / Clango: Yeah, I ride the bus. / Clango: You got a problem with that? / Clango: Well, I WOULD drive a car if THE MAN would let me get a license. / Clango: But since I can't even vote, I'm not counting on it.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Clango: Isn't my kitten the cutest? / Indy Rock Pete: Meh. / Clango: "Meh?" / Clango: That word is the worst thing that ever came from the internet. / Clango: How do you "Meh" a kitten? Are you even human? / Clango: I can't believe that a monster like you evolved from monkeys. / Clango: Monkeys...
New Heights of Music Snobbery: diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete and Electron Mike face off on a green background]] / Indie Rock Pete: What's my favourite band? You've probably never heard of them / [[Background goes gray]] / Electron Mike: Try me! I love music! / Indie Rock Pete: Have you ever heard of the "Played Outs"? / Electron Mike: Nope. / Indie...
Peeing Standing Up Metal Steve: I FEEL SO OLD! The radio was on and I heard- / Maura Glee: Oh, hush. / Maura Glee: Dude, you're barely booze-legal. I don't want to hear it. / Maura Glee: Pop music didn't have to stop changing just because YOU learned how to pee standing up. / / [[Maura sits on the toilet, talking into...
Bands Shouldn't Have Fans :diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Jon Stamos the cat stands on the counter facing Indie Rock Pete]] / Indie Rock Pete: Repeat after me: / Indie Rock Pete: "Modest Mouse was a cool band but now they're too popular." / Jon Stamos: Mew! / [[Clango appears behind Indie Rock Pete]] / Indie Rock Pete {{directed at Clango}}: Your kitten...
 
diesel sweeties: "Bottoms Up" [[We see Clango lying on the ground looking up at a woman (Maura? we only see her from the chest down) in sneakers and a skirt.]] / Maura: Dude, why are you on the ground? / Clango: Banana peel. / Maura: Are you gonna get up? / Clango: Nope. / Maura: Why the hell not? / Clango: Skirts. / Maura: Hurr hurr / Clango:...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[A new instant message is blinking on a screen on some desk]] / [[Uncle Grandpa sitting in front of his laptop on a desk]] / Uncle Grandpa; How long does it take to answer a damn instant message? / Uncle Grandpa; And what the hell "NOTORIOUS B.R.B." is supossed to mean? / Uncle Grandpa; Maybe i ought...
Oldest Trick in the Book Metal Steve: What's up, hipster? / Indie Rock Pete: GAH! / Indie Rock Pete: Why did you call me that? / Metal Steve: Gee, I dunno. Maybe the way you can't use the bathroom without acting like it's ironic? / Indie Rock Pete: Bah! What do YOU know? / Metal Steve: I know that all the cool kids have...
Too Many Friends Torpor: Hello girl with nice fanny! / Torpor: Will you be my friend? / Lil' Sis: Um, sure! / Torpor: Hooray for friends! / Lil' Sis: Hooray for flattery! / Red Robot #C-63: Hooray for jealousy.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Red Robot: Hey! What's the big idea macking on my lady, polite boy? / Torpor: But Torpor was just being nice. / Red Robot: Too bad! Stop it! / Torpor: Do you want Torpor to stop being nice? / Red Robot: You better or I'll kick your ass. / Red Robot: Amateur. / Torpor: Grr!
 
diesel sweeties: "Evil Doesn't Do Much Good" [[Torpor, carrying the disembodied head of Red Robot up high like a trophy, appears next to Clango.]] / Clango: Ahem! Are you acting "evil"? / Torpor: NO? / [[Torpor puts down Red Robot's head and looks abashed.]] / Clango: Not only is that a cliche, but it's not good for anyone. / Clango: Humans are...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Red Robot is standing headless]] / [[Red Robot's head is sitting next to Uncle Grandpa on a desk]] / Uncle Grandpa; It sucks not having a body, doesn't it? / Red Robot; I think it's kind of relaxing. / Red Robot; It's like I'm having vacation from having to smash stuff. / Uncle Grandpa; Can I ask...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Uncle Grandpa is using Red Robot's body to walk around outside]] / <> / <> / <> / Uncle Grandpa: This rules! / Uncle Grandpa: I can walk around on my own! / Uncle Grandpa: I don't need anybody! / Uncle Grandpa: I'm gonna tell off all my friends and get drunk! / [[The body trips,...
Gay Marriage vs. Fonzie Indie Rock Pete: Did you know that gay people can only REALLY get married in Massachusetts? / Lil' Sis: But are they married in the eyes of god? / Indie Rock Pete: Perhaps a COOL version of god. / Indie Rock Pete: The god equivalent of having a dad who's an astronaut! / Lil' Sis: Does he have an...
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic well, well, well. / Mr. angrey murder bot is helpless! / I could do anyhting I wanted right now and for once you can't beat me up. / I've been wating for this day for a very long time. / This unit is crying on the inside.
 

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