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| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Indie Rock Pete: College students are idiots. / Indie Rock Pete: All they do is learn, grow and drink! / Indie Rock Pete: What kind of moron admits they don't know everything? / Indie Rock Pete: Yo, me and the Pope got lots in common- like infallibility!
/ [[Metal Steve looks away]] http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=300 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Collin is standing infront of a blackboard speaking to a class, there is a smily face next to him on the blackboard]]
/ Collin: As I established in my introduction, psycho-analyst Carl Jung was born in the jungle and raised by gorillas. / Collin: This, coupled with his theory of collective unconscious, clearly explains why everyone loves monkeys.
/ [[Smily face on the chalkboard frowns]] / Collin: Any questions?
/ [[Smily face begins to smile again]] / Collin: Yes, Ookla? Ask Away. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=301 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Metal Steve is sitting at a desk, talking to an iMac]]
/ Metal Steve: What the dilly, yo?! / Metal Steve: Why aren't you enlightening me? / [[iMac emits a massive wave of blinding light, Metal Steve clenches his face shut]] / Metal Steve: Good Lord! I had no idea that I was circumsized! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=302 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Indie Rock Pete: Why is it that people always say a rocker's old stuff was better?
/ Indie Rock Pete: Does old age really wreck the ability to rock, or is it finincial success that does it?
/ Metal Steve: Suck a duck, man! How would I know?
/ [[Background becomes bright, flamboyant pink]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: Was that a typo or did you just reveal your orientation? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=303 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Lil' Sis: Hee hee! I am become death, the shatterer of worlds! Whee! / Metal Steve: *snif* / Metal Steve: What did you eat for lunch!? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=304 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Clango talking with Eve]]
/ Clango: Being def and paying taxes! / Clango: Nothing else in a cash money rapper's life is as certain as that. / Eve: No "shiznit" has ever been truer, holmes! / Clango: One or both of us just lost me. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=305 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Clango: For health reasons, I no longer eat any petroleum products. / Clango: Where I once drank oil, I shall now just ingest soy-l. Yum! / Maura: You eat dirt? / Clango: I used to, but you're much nicer than that girl I dated before. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=306 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Eve talking with Indie Rock Pete, who's wearing a skull cap]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: Word to your Yenta! Happy Hanukkah! / Eve: Indie Rock Pete! Sicne when are you Jewish? / Indie Rock Pete: I'm not. / Indie Rock Pete: I'm just pissed that christmas 'sold out.' http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=307 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Indie Rock Pete talking with Metal Steve]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: Nothing in life goes my way! / Indie Rock Pete: All I ever wanted was to live in a cultural vacuum! / Metal Steve: So all you want to do is suck? / Indie Rock Pete: Is that too much to ask for? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=308 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Red Robot talking with Indie Rock Pete]]
/ Red Robot: Milk helps make strong bones and muscles! / Indie Rock Pete: And let me guess! You like to "crush" them, don't you? / Red Robot: Do you know how to go from smug to bloody in one easy step? / Indie Rock Pete: Is the answer "crushing"? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=309 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Joel talking with Clango]]
/ Joel: I am a human being and I demand to be treated as such! / Joel: I demand equal rights as a programmer! / Clango: But Joel, you do have equal rights under U.S. law! / Joel: Then I know some sexy ladies who are gonna hear from my lawyers. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=310 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Clango and Maura in bed, with Camo bedsheet]]
/ Clango: Private! Damn the torpedoes and praise the vulva! / Clango: Embrace and extend, little soldier! Make love plus war! / Clango: Get it on behind enemy lines! Drop and give me pleasure! / Maura: Must be the camoflage sheets. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=311 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{Guest strip by DEREK KIRK (www.smallstoriesonline.com)}} / [[Indie Rock Pete and Emo Rock Hyung are chatting at a club, beers in hand]]
/ Pete: Hey, What's up Emo Rock Hyung?
/ Hyung: According to "A" magazine, Asian men are the new trophy boyfriends for women! / Hyung: We are the new sex symbol for a new millenium! No longer will we hide under the oppressive shadow of Long Duk Dong! It's yellow lovin' time, baby!!
/ [[A red-headed hottie female comes into frame, looking at Pete]]
/ Hottie: You. Me. Bathroom. Now.
/ Pete: ! / [[Pete and the Hottie exit, frame left]]
/ Pete: Later, Emo Rock Hyung!
/ [[Hyung faces frame right]]
/ Hyung: Alright, which one of you lucky vixens wants to be the first to take home The Dragon?! / [[Cut to Hyung sitting on his couch with a dejected look on his face, watching TV with stacks of porno tapes next to it, with titles like "Gangbang X", "Deep Throat", "Poontang High", etc.]]
/ TV: OOOH! OH YEAH! AAAHH!! OH, BABY! HUNGH! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=312 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[In a nightclub, or possibly a concert. Indie Rock pete and two Fangirls. (Not Pete's fangirls of course...]]
/ Fangirl #1: Dude, the Kewpie Squalls are my new favourite band!
/ Indie Rock Pete: Psh! That's so yesterday! / Indie Rock Pete: I've been into the Q.P.'s since DAY ONE! / Fangirl #1: Say... when did the Kewpie's form?
/ Fangirl #2: Um, yesterday. / [[Fangirls leave]]
/ Fangirl #1: Let's go!
/ Indie Rock Pete: Yeah, exit the bandwagon, trendmonkeys!
/ Indie Rock Pete: This site is staked and claimed! / {{Guest Comic by Jesse Hamm}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=313 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Maura and Clango are in bed]] / Maura: Clango? Are you awake?
/ Clango: Just hibernating. Hang on, let me spin up my disks. / Maura: I've been thinking... you've never been with another woman, and yet here I am, an ex-porn-star.
/ Clango: "Mature entertainment icon."
/ Maura: Yeah, whatever. Isn't it... well, difficult for you? I mean, most men pretend to be all into it, but underneath they're always jealous of my past. And especially for you, having only been with me! Aren't you even the least bit resentful? / Clango: *sigh*
/ Silly flesh-ling, bring your soft body here to me. / Clango: I'm not like most men, and you know it. I'm not even hu-man, and so I'm not given to look for reasons to be miserable when I have everything I could possibly want right here.
/ Maura: Everything?
/ Clango: Well, except an iPod. But I guess the holidays are coming up... / Maura: Oh, Clango, you always know the right words to say.
/ Clango: Yes - I have a large database. Now turn off that light.
/ Maura: ...Clango! / Metal Steve: Where can I find a robot like that?
/ Indie Rock Pete: Whoa, dude. Rick Springfield? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=314 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Fantasy drawing of Red Robot holding aloft a severed head, carrying a stylised Eve in his arm]]
/ Eve: Hey, I heard you'd taken my dumping you kinda not well, and it's not thtat I, you know, care about your feelings or anything, but it's getting kinda hard to get laid with you yelling at my dates all the time, and I thought it... Hello? R.R.? / [[Red Robot is daydreaming the above. Eve is talking to him]]
/ Eve: Oi, Red, stay with me here. / {{Guest Comic by Vera}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=315 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Boy in a doctor's booth talking to Red Robot]]
/ Red Robot: This unit wishes to crush all hu-mans... / Red Robot: It is my primary function... My reason for being... / Red Robot: Why must this unit be so filled with hate? / Boy: It's probably because you're not getting any. / {{Guest Comic by Les McClaine}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=316 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Indie Rock Pete in bad Jesus costume]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: I am the mighty Dinner Plate Jesus... / Indie Rock Pete: ...Vengeful vegetarian son of God! / Indie Rock Pete: I can turn water into hummus and make the skies red with blood! / Indie Rock Pete: Um, fake blood. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=317 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Clango wearing a santa hat, talking to Joel, wearing a santa suit]]
/ Clango: Joel, you're a slightly husky boy- Why aren't you jollier? / [[Joel half-heartedly tries to be jolly]] / [[He fails]] / Joel: Maybe it's because you have my god-damn hat. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=318 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Random Woman (Daisy) talking to Red Robot, who has a santa hat on. Outside in the snow]]
/ Random Woman: Red Robot! You are full of the spirit of christmas!
/ Red Robot: Ho ho. Ho. / Red Robot: I have a gift for all hu-mans: Painful burning death. / [[Red Robot holds a gift]]
/ Random Woman: But do you have a gift for unit Daisy?
/ Red Robot: Yes. I made it myself. / [[Random Woman opens it to find it's Clango's head]]
/ Random Woman: What is it? What does it do?
/ Red Robot: Nothing! It is totally useless! Ha ha! / {{Guest Comic by John Allison}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=319 |
| jason alderman's guest strip | {{n/t}} / {{n/t}} / {{n/t}} / maura: [[from off panel]] clango? i'm back from the store with the rustoleum you wanted...
/ clango: !!! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=320 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Metal Steve talking to Indie Rock Pete, who is holding a bag of cookies]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: Have a cookie.
/ Metal Steve: Thanks! / Metal Steve: Pete, these were flavoured with soy sauce.
/ Indie Rock Pete: They're experimental. Nobody makes cookies this way except me! / Metal Steve: Couldn't you just food-color them green?
/ Indie Rock Pete: Of course not. / Indie Rock Pete: I can't be avant-garde if I steal your ideas.
/ Metal Steve: I think that this recipie will stay wa-ay underground. / {{Guest Comic by Steph Pulford}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=321 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Maura and Clango talking in front of the toaster]]
/ Maura: Clango, as a robot, do you think toasters dream?
/ Clango: Oh, don't be such a silly hu-man... / [[The toaster grows a body and stands up breaking the surface it's on]]
/ Maura: < http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=322 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Old man smoking a pipe in a sitting room, going to sit down in a chair]]
/ Old Man: < http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=323 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Indie Rock Pete talking with Lil' Sis]]
/ Lil' Sis: Crap! All I got for Xmas were gifts of self-improvement! / Lil' Sis: If I wanted to be organized or in good shape, I'd buy it for my own damn self! / Lil' Sis: I'm also somewhat troubled that my mom bought me condoms. / Lil' Sis: I know it's only because she hates to babysit. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=324 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Maura talking with Carl]]
/ Carl: Howdy doo, Maura Glee! / Carl: Give me money or I'll try to rekindle our failed romance. / [[No dialogue]] / Maura: I'll give you two pairs of underpants you can auction, cotton only. That is my final offer. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=325 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Indie Rock Pete talking to Metal Steve]]
/ Indie Rock Pete: A booty call is the reason! / Indie Rock Pete: Booty, I tells you! Fresh, moist booty! / [[No dialogue]] / Metal Steve: And you also get free nights and weekends? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=326 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Lil' Sis talking to Maura]]
/ Lil' Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by MY lax standards. / Lil' Sis: One usually informs one's boyfriend when one gives used panties to one's ex-boyfriend. / Maura: Oh, come on. / Maura: I was ONLY bribing him to go away. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=327 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Red Robot talking to Eve]]
/ Red Robot: Do you love me? / Red Robot: Or do you fear me? / Eve: I'd love to fear you. / Eve: But I know you aren't into the kinky stuff. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=328 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Clango talking to Carl]]
/ Carl: Maura isn't an ex-porn start. / Carl: She's a total soft-hearted sucker! hah! / Carl: She game me some underpants I could sell because I said I was low on cash. / Carl: ... But the joke's on her! I kept them! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=329 |
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