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| diesel sweeties: "Metrics" | [[Pale Suzie is smiling at Red Robot]]
/ Pale Suzie: See you at eight? Don't be late!
/ Pale Suzie: Heh. / Red Robot: Feh.
/ [[Pale Suzie stops smiling]] / Red Robot: Express it in picoseconds or don't even bother, sister. / [[Pale Suzie is gone. Red Robot raises his arm triumphantly.]]
/ Red Robot: Metric system: One. Friends: Zero! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=810 |
| diesel sweeties: "Memory Loss" | Maura: If I wiped your memory, would you still love me? / Clango: Would I remember that you erased my memory? / Maura: You didn't last time. / Clango: Does that count as love at first sight? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=811 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{"The Yiffening"}} / [[Nipples the Bear, holding a cigar, and Lil' Sis are talking]]
/ Nipples: Do you mind if I smoke? / Sis: It's a free country.
/ [[Nipples lights the cigar]] / Nipples: At least until those God-damned liberals legislate all of our rights away! / [[Nipples exhales a cloud of smoke, filling the frame]]
/ Nipples: On that day, the dreaded Yiffening will have begun. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=812 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{"Indie is Annoying"}} / [[Indie Rock Pete and Lil' Sis are talking]]
/ Pete: I sold five CDs yesterday. / Pete: Plus I saw on a web site that some kids have started to dress like me. / Pete: I'm a pretty big deal in some circles.
/ Sis: (thinking) Yeah, the jerk ones. / [[Pete smirks at Sis' scowl]] / Sis: Let's start a new trend and call it 'shutting the hell up.' / Sis: Then you can go be a pioneer in bothering someone who gives half a crap! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=813 |
| diesel sweeties: "Radioactive Treats" | [[Menace-11 is talking to Pale Suzie]]
/ Menace-11: I am SO tired. / Menace-11: ALL DAY LONG, ACCELERATING PARTICLES... / Menace-11: AND ALL NIGHT LONG, WORKING AT THE 7-11. / < http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=814 |
| diesel sweeties:"Rok Em Sok Em Kiss Me Kill Me" | Red Robot: YOU'RE A HU-MAN LOVING JERK! / Clango: Yeah, well you're a dummy-dumb! / Clango: A dimmy-dammy dummy-dumb! / [[Red Robot's head is now bouncing up and down on it's much-stretched neck]]
/ Red Robot: Ow. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=815 |
| President Dingy | Clango: If you could be any animal, what would you pick?
/ Maura: Peanut Butter! / Clango: If you could meet any U.S. president living or dead, who would you choose?
/ Maura: Superman! / Clango: If you got to have dinner with any of the Beatles, which one would it be?
/ Maura: Elvis! / Clango: What's your favorite way to buy music online?
/ Maura: Stealing! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=816 |
| Instant Friends | [[Red Robot is alone in the frame wearing a golden hat]]
/ RED ROBOT: I LOVE WEARING MY GOLDEN HAT. / [[Indy Rock Pete joins Red Robot in the frame]]
/ RED ROBOT: IT HELPS ME SHOW OFF MY WEALTH / [[Joel and Indy Rock Pete join Red Robot in the frame]]
/ RED ROBOT: IT IS A MORE FABULOUS PRODUCT THAN SHOWN ON ANY INFO-MERCIAL! / [[Lil Sis, Joel and Indy Rock Pete join Red Robot in the frame]]
/ RED ROBOT: INSTANT FRIENDS - JUST ADD MONEY! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=817 |
| Shazamotron | [[Double Frame. Lil Sis is seen through the window in the comics store. Sheriff Batman! and Fantastic 4 Ramen posters are visibile on the wall.]]
/ LIL SIS: BLEH. I HATE THIS JOB. / [[Inside the comics store. Lil Sis and Metal Steve are in the frame]]
/ METAL STEVE: YOU'RE SO LUCKY! I WISH I WORKED AT THE COMIC SHOP. / LIL SIS: SHAZAM! YOU'RE THE NEW NERD PRINCE! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=818 |
| A Long Talk | {{Frame backgrounds transition from red to brown to green to yellow}}
/ LIL SIS: SCREW THIS RETARDED RAT-RACE ASS-GRIND BUTT CRAP! I QUIT! / LIL SIS: I'M TIRED OF BARELY SCRAPING BY WHILE THE WEALTHY HAVE TALKING GOLDEN URINALS! / LIL SIS: ESPECIALLY SINCE THEY CAN'T EVEN BE BOTHERED TO ASK THE URINALS HOW THEY'RE FEELING. / [[Lil Sis Glares at Maura]] / MAURA: YO, YOU WORK LIKE FIVE HOURS A WEEK AT A COMIC BOOK STORE. / MAURA: UNDER THE TABLE. / MAURA: TO PAY FOR THE RIMS ON YOUR HONDA. / [[Lil Sis looks shocked]] http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=819 |
| Vibrolator | [[Clango and Maura are in bed under the covers, Roger is out of the frame]]
/ CLANGO: ROGER!
/ MAURA: C'MON UP, MEOW!
/ ROGER: MEW! / [[Roger's head is visible at the side of the bed]]
/ ROGER: MEW! / [[Roger climbs in bed and settles on Maura's lap]] / [[Animated frame, Clango and Maura are in bed being vibrated by Roger]]
/ ROGER: PURR http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=820 |
| The New King: diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Metal Steve stands in the comic store in a green lantern t-shirt]]
/ Metal Steve: Yay! I'm king nerd / Metal Steve: I get to run the comic book store! / [[Metal Steve gets a pensive expression]]
/ Metal Steve: Now I can yell at anyone I want! / [[The shop goes dark and the poster in the background changes from the X-men logo to Magneto's helmet as Metal Steve smirks and his t-shirt turns to a black one with a skull]] / {{title text - The New King}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=821 |
| diesel sweeties: "I Hate Justice" | [[Metal Steve, with an exclamation mark over his head, is looking across the room, dismayed.]] / [[We see what he's looking at: Indie Pete, reading a Batman comic with the book spread wide open.]] / Metal Steve: Pete! Why are you breaking Batman's spine? / Metal Steve: Why do you hate justice SO MUCH?! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=822 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{"Nemesis Lad"}} / [[Metal Steve, working at the comic shop, confronts Indie Rock Pete, who's reading a comic]]
/ Steve: You gotta pay for that comic. You ruined it.
/ Pete: Screw you, narc! / Pete: I'm not paying for this corporately made solless drek! / Pete: Even if I DID enjoy reading it. / [[Steve scowls at Pete]] http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=823 |
| diesel sweeties: "Your Captain is Speaking" | [[Maura is alone in the panel when her cell phone rings.]] / Maura (speaking on phone): Hey there! / [[Clango is wearing a pilot's cap and speaking into his phone.]]
/ Clango: Hello! This is your captain speaking! / Clango: We have passed RAD and are cruising full speed into AWESOME! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=824 |
| Right on Target | Lil' Sis: This is the world's cutest shirt! / Lil' Sis: It's so stylish I almost forget it's mass market! / [[Lil' Sis gets hit by an arrow]] *THUNK* / [[Lil' Sis falls to the ground, I. R. Pete does nothing]]*THUD* http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=825 |
| diesel sweeties: "Jesus on the Can" | [[Maura is sitting on the toilet, holding a beer bottle and talking on the cell phone]]
/ Maura: My website was down for three whole days. Then it miraculously came back to life! / Maura: No... / Maura: I'm not ACTUALLY Jesus. / Maura: But you just gave me a great idea. / [[Silence as Maura sits there thinking.]] / [[The beer bottle is now held between her legs while Maura gesticulates with her free hand.]]
/ Maura: I wonder how I would MARKET stigmata porn? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=826 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Lil' Sis and Eve]]
/ Lil' Sis: Bitch, where you been?! I'm all missin' on you like crazy! / Lil' Sis: It's been ages since I snagged one of your stubble-free kisses. / Eve: Um, I've been really busy since I got married... / [[Background turns sour]]
/ Lil' Sis: But what about our "no-peenie" pact? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=827 |
| Diesel Sweeties : Hitched Again | I can't believe you went and got married on me! / You were my Communist lesbian counterpart! / My mushy Marxist! / My Hammer and Sexicle! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=828 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Lil Sis: I hope you choke on a garter, Miss Bride-Ass / Lil Sis: #$%^@#$^#$@#$%WTF$%# / Eve: [silent] / Eve: Jesus Loves You! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=829 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Red Robot and Little Sis discuss Eve's marriage.]]
/ Red Robot: She got MARRIED?
/ Little Sis: She got married.
/ Red Robot: I can't believe it.
/ Little Sis: Same here.
/ Red Robot and Little Sis in Unison: I think I loved her.
/ [[Red Robot sits in bed with his arm around an undressed Little Sis.]]
/ {{title text: Young Love or Some Deep Shit}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=830 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Indie Rock Pete: Just shut up! I don't want to hear it! / Clango: Hey! Just because we're different, it doesn't mean we- / Indie Rock Pete: Yeah, we're different all right. I shower! / Indie Rock Pete: Stupid hippie! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=831 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | Red Robot: Unit GIRL_FRIEND02, do you celebrate "Christmas"? / Lil' Sis: I try to live in the present, if you get my meaning. / Lil' Sis: I guess you could say that I practice zen materialism. / Red Robot: Weak pun detected! Shields up! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=832 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{"TV Party"}} / [[Torpor is watching static on a TV]]
/ < http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=833 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{"Say Howdy"}} / [[Clango and Torpor are talking]]
/ Clango: I'm glad you're OK, Torpor. I thought you were dead! / Torpor: Having an un-smashed head is super! Now I go say hi to friends! / [[Torpor greets Roger the cat]]
/ Torpor: Hello talking taco!
/ Roger: Mew! / [[Torpor greets Indie Rock Pete]]
/ Torpor: Hello, pickle nose! / [[Torpor greets Pale Suzie]]
/ Torpor: Hello, happy fire boobies! / [[Torpor greets Menace-11]]
/ Torpor: Hello, man kissing monster who once killed me! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=834 |
| diesel sweeties: "Magneto Was Right" | [[Torpor is standing next to a toaster]]
/ Torpor: HELLO, TOASTER! / [[Torpor is standing next to a urinal]]
/ Torpor: HELLO, URINAL! / [[Torpor is standing next to a giant magnet, which is wobbling]]
/ Torpor: HELLO GIANT MAGNET! / < http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=835 |
| diesel sweeties: "Why Jesus" | [[Eve is talking to Indie Pete]]
/ Eve: How did I accept the Lord Jesus Christ into my life? HEH! / Eve: That's actually a very funny story! / Eve: I was attending a 'Christians for Christ' rally in an ironic manner one day... / Eve: (Of course, this is back when I had a trucker hat) / Indie Pete: Heh! I love those rallies! / Indie Pete: The girls there TOTALLY put out.
/ [[Eve looks dismayed]] http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=836 |
| diesel sweeties: "To Lift Again" | [[Clango is standing anxiously between Collin and the lifeless Torpor]]
/ Clango: Tell it to me straight, Doc! Is Torpor dead?
/ Clango: Will he ever be able to lift things again? / Collin: We had this same conversation about a month ago. / Collin: You really don't remember? / Clango: Oh, yeah! You laughed at me and pushed his reset button. / Clango: Thereby causing my entire life to be meaningless. http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=837 |
| diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | {{title text: Why are you so mad?}}
/ [[Clango Cyclotron stands next to Maura Glee with his arm around her]]
/ Clango: WHY ARE YOU SO MAD? WHAT DID I DO?! / Clango: SWEETIE, WILL YOU AT LEAST TELL ME? / [[they stand together silently]] / Clango: IRRATIONAL FLESH-LING! WHY MUST I LOVE YOU? http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s838 |
| diesel sweeties: "Cold School Turtle Neckin'" | [[Clango is wearing a big white turtleneck sweater.]]
/ Clango: The icy grip of death is much fluffier than I had imagined! / Maura: What a lovely turtleneck. / Clango: It's my endothermic mock-neck of doom! / Clango: I'm a stylish nihilist! http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=838 |
| File Transfer Protocol: diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic | [[Red Robot sits up in bed with his arm draped around Lil Sis's shoulders, her hair is mussed]]
/ Red Robot: You want my Christmas list?
/ Lil Sis: Yeah. / Lil Sis: It's not like I know you very well yet, aside from the sex. / [[Red Robot sits in bed next to Lil Sis saying nothing]] / [[Red Robot narrows one eye to concentrate and radio waves flicker in Lil Sis's direction]] / [[Red Robot closes the other eye and narrows the other as radio waves still flicker off his antenna towards Lil Sis who looks worried]]
/ Red Robot: Ahem. / [[Red Robot looks upset as Lil Sis raises both her eyebrows]]
/ Red Robot: Bed mate "Lil' Sis" has cancelled the file transfer. / {{title text - File Transfer Protocol}} http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=839 |
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