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diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Jon Stamos the kitten stands on the counter as Clango talks to him]] / Clango: MEOW! PURR! / [[Jon Stamos the kitten stands on the counter as Clango talks to him, Jon Stamos the kitten look puzzled]] / Clango: WOOF! WOOF! / Jon Stamos: ? / [[Jon Stamos the kitten stands on the counter as Clango talks to him]] / Clango: YO, WHAT UP? RADICAL TO THA XTREME: {{emphasis}}WOOT?{{end emphasis}} / [[Indie Rock Pete stands on his own]] / Indie Rock Pete: STOP TRYING TO "TALK HIP" TO YOUR KID! IT'S JUST EMBARRASSING / {{title text - Talking Hip to Your Kids}}
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=990
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Mayor McCheese: There's no art in this business anymore. / Hamburglar: Robble robble. / Mayor McCheese: You're right. It IS just about making money these days. / Mayor McCheese: Back in my day we did everything by hand - from BUN to PICKLES! / [[Pull back to reveal that the previous panels were just Indie Rock Pete playing with McDonald's toys.]] / Indie Rock Pete: Sigh.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=991
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Lil' Sis hiding inside a house. Only her eyes are viisble through a partially open window. Maura is offscreen outside]] / Maura: Where the hell is my lazy sister, and WHY is the lawn not mowed? / Lil' Sis: I'm busy! / [[Shot of Maura with the lawnmower, in thigh-high grass]] / Maura: You're busy? / Maura: Doing what? Smelling your farts? / [[Back to the shot of the window]] / Lil' Sis: Maybe I was studying very hard last night! / Maura: Then maybe you need to pay me some rent!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=992
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Maura talking to Lil' Sis, who's wearing a backpack.]] / Maura: You're really going back to school, sis? / Lil' Sis: And this time, it's personal! / Lil' Sis: Summerterm to tha maxx! / Maura: You planning to last a full WEEK this time? / [[Lil' Sis looks distraught whilst Maura smiles]]
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=993
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Why are you studying? I thought you wanted to be in porn like me. / Remember the Xmas special with the elf who just wanted to be a dentist? / Of course! I hate elves! / That elf inspired me. / / He reminded me that I can be so much MORE than just a hot ass. / Of course you are! Ass is just the free section of the site.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=994
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[outside, sun shining. Indie Rock Pete has pit stains.]] / Pete: What're you staring at? / Lil Sis: Nice pits, drippy. / Pete: Whatever, it's hot! / Lil Sis: Does artistic integrity mean no deodorant? / Pete: Typical. / Lil Sis: You smell like crap. / Pete: I smell like elitism.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=995
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete is sweating profusely.]] / Lil' sis: Maybe you should by an air conditioner before you melt? / Indie Rock Pete: Screw that! / Indie Rock Pete: You know how many cartons of cigarettes I can get for the same amount of money? / Lil' Sis: A lot? / Indie Rock Pete: I could smoke all summer! / Indie Rock Pete: Coff. / Indie Rock Pete: If I'm gonna pay for air, there should at least be drugs in it. / {{Comic name: Pack a Day}}
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=996
Tricky Chicky [[Lil' Sis talking to Metal Steve]] / Lil' Sis: Watch This. / Lil' Sis: Hey Clango, why do robots suck? / Clango: If robots suck, it is only because someone programmed them to. / Lil' Sis: See! He always falls for it!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=997
The Robot Is Sad Metal Steve: Clango, does it hurt to be a robot? / Clango: Nah. / Clango: Only when people make fun of me. / Metal Steve: Do people make fun of you a lot? / Clango: Nah. / Clango: Only constantly.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=998
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Metal Steve is standing in front of a fan getting his mullet blown around, and Maura and Pale Susie are watching.]] / Maura: Weird! It's like he's head-banging standing still. / Susie: It makes me feel oddly patriotic. / Susie: Imagine if an amber wave of grain grought an old Trans Am and tookl a Purple Mountain's Majesty to Oxxfest on a date! / Maura: Huh? / {{Oscillation on the Fruited Plain}}
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=999
 
Gleaming the Ten Cubed Lil' Sis: You're a beautiful ex-porn star. / Maura: My ass is a diamond mine. / Lil' Sis: You're also independent and loaded! / Maura: Usually before noon! / Lil' Sis: You could have anyone! / Maura: Anyone who fits. / Lil' Sis: Why are you dating a dumb poor robot? / [[Lil' Sis and Maura are silent]] / Clango: I'm nice to her! / Indie Rock Pete: That's your secret? / Clango: Mostly. I'm also disease-proof. / Indie Rock Pete: Lovably sterile? / Clango: I was born in a "clean room"! / Indie Rock Pete: I came out of a lady. / Clango: Lucky. / Indie Rock Pete: Yeah, I like to think i'm pretty special.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1000
Real Stories of the Donut Patrol Clango: Do you want to see the best part about dating a porn star? / Pete: Um. / Pete: It's not a nudie picture of both of you, right? / Pete: I don't want to get grossed out or really excited or anything. / [[Clango whips out a box of donuts]] / Pete: Oooh! Gooey!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1001
Heavy Metal Pool Party LIL SIS: Steve! Are you coming swimming or what? / STEVE: Hold on! I forgot my suit. / LIL SIS: Gah!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1002
Convincing You Otherwise [[Lil' Sis, Metal Steve, and Maura are in a swimming pool.]] / Lil' Sis: This isn't a swimming pool on a sunny day. / Maura: No? / Lil' Sis: This is water bombarded with pure awesome particles. / Maura: Quit complicating my summer. / Steve: Blub.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1003
Hot Narwhal Action Lil Sis: Look at me! I'm a narwhal! / Maura: We all live on an auburn submarine! / Clango: Grr. / Clango: Wow, I really don't feel at all left out over here. / Clango: Insensitive bags of water having all that fun without me.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1004
 
I Cannot Promise That Indie Rock Pete: Hey Maura, I was wondering if I could come use your pool? / Maura: I might need to secure a promise from you first. / Maura: Sorry dude, trying not to poop in the pool isn't good enough. / Indie Rock Pete: But I can't promise you that. I get so excited!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1005
Slimer Ends a Conversation [[Location is Maura's house pool where Maura and Lil' Sis are in the pool and Clango's disconnected head is at poolside]] / Lil' Sis: Was that Pete on the phone? Is he coming over? / Maura: He wanted to but I told him he couldn't. / Clango: How come? / Maura: For the sheer joy of telling him "no". / Clango: That's mean. / Maura: It's ok. Making fun of him has become and small industry. / Lil' Sis: He was gonna bring me ice cream! I got one word for you, cranky-ass! / [[Lil' Sis gets a scrunchy look on her face as she appears to be bearing down while releasing flatus. The pool water turns a slime-green color with thick bubbles]] / <> / [[Off panel comment from either / or both Maura and / or Clango]]: GAH!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1006
Vegan Kisses [[Red Robot stands at the outdoor grill wearing a chef's smock that reads "CRUSH THE COOK". A steak lets off a plume of smoke while cooking on the grill. Metal Steve and Lil' Sis converse in the side panel. Lil' Sis is holding a plate with a cooked steak on it.]] / Metal Steve: It must be hard to make it through the summer as a vegan. / Lil' Sis: No burgers or hot dogs! That's got to suck. / Lil' Sis: Not to mention they can't make out in meat lockers on hot days. / Red Robot: SHUT UP AND CONSUME YOUR ROASTED FLESH! YOU SOUND LIKE FILM STUDENTS!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1007
Soda Voter [[Maura and Metal Steve converse while the background changes colors from panel to panel]] / [[Lime-green Background]] / Maura: There are three flavors of Mountain Dew. / [[Yellow Background]] / Maura: There's gotta be at least six types of M+M's candy. / [[Red Background]] / Maura: There are EASILY nine varieties of Coca-Cola. / [[Lime-green Background]] / Maura: And there are TWO major political parties in this country! / [[Yellow Background]] / Maura: Our priorities are messed up! / [[Red Background]] / Metal Steve: Our priorities are delicious!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1008
I Love Pickles [[Metal Steve and Indie Rock Pete converse while the background changes colors from panel to panel]] / [[Background is crimson red]] / Indie Rock Pete: CRAP! I just found out that some band has the same name as mine. / [[Background is Smurf blue]] / Metal Steve: Let's think of a new one! / [[Background is Gnapp green]] / Metal Steve: Pickle Mongers? [[Metal Steve's shirt logo has changed from the usual skull to a pixilated pickle]] / Indie Rock Pete: Ew. / [[Background is Elephant pink]] / Metal Steve: The Cake Eaters! [[Metal Steve's shirt logo has changed again into a pixilated slice of white cake with pink frosting]] / Indie Rock Pete: Lame. / [[Background is Smurf blue, again]] / Metal Steve: Muffin Christ! [[Metal Steve's shirt logo has changed into a pixilated muffin with a cross atop it]] / Indie Rock Pete: Perfect. / [[Background is Paisley lavender]] / Metal Steve: Are you hungry? [[Metal Steve's shirt logo has returned to his usual pixilated skull]] / Indie Rock Pete: Usually.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1009
 
Fur Pride Rally [[Nipples the Bear and Lil' Sis converse while the background changes colors from panel to panel]] / [[Background is a heavier grey]] / Nipples the Bear: Want to come with me to a Fur Pride rally? / [[Background is brown]] / Lil' Sis: Are Furries a downtrodden minority? / Nipples the Bear: We sure are! We DEMAND the same rights as the rest of you people! / [[Background is again a heavier grey]] / Lil' Sis: I thought you didn't want to BE people?
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1010
Getting Ahead on Dying [[Background is a night-time landscape where Indie Rock Pete and Pale Suzie converse]] / [Indie Rock Pete is smoking a cigarette] / Pale Suzie: How's your summer treating you, Petey? / Indie Rock Pete [not smoking]: Freakin' awesome! I'm catching up on my cigarettes! / Indie Rock Pete: I started last week but I'm already smoking at a college level. / [Indie Rock Pete returns to smoking a cigarette] / Pale Suzie: Wow, it's great to see you finally find the success you deserve!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1011
Underpant Emails [[Lil' Sis sits in front of her computer, naked]] / Lil' Sis: Bleh. / Lil' Sis: Shopping nude just isn't as much fun as it used to be. / ... / Lil' Sis: I might as well buy some underwear.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1012
Jpeg Gin and Lossy Juice Maura: You look blurry. / Clango: (Blurry) You sound drunk! / Maura: I simply do not see how those two statements could possibly be connected. / Maura: (Off panel) We shall discuss this matter further after I vomit.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1013
Vote Robocratic Clango: "Articulate." / Clango: I hate it when humans call me "articulate." / Clango: It's like they're all surprised that I can speak intelligently. / Clango: Beings that can barely do floating point math are gonna patronize me having a slight accent? / Clango: Maybe I'd talk better if my job paid enough that I could afford to buy a new voice chip. / Red Computer [[waving flag]]: Vote Robocratic!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1014
 
American Made Despot menace-11: japan! / tupor: taiwan! / red robot: china: bigger, redder, uncut. / uncle grandpa: cupertino, california! / red robot: looks like you're the only natural born u.s. citizen. / red robot: you are the official robocratic party presidential nominee. / uncle grandpa: i win at america!
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1015
oratin uncle grandpa: equal rights for all robots! electricity is a right, /not/ a privilege! / torpor: huzzah! / uncle grandpa: the robocratic party stands for fixing! /fixing at all costs!/ / red robot: he is a uniter, not a divider! / uncle grandpa: those who would deny us our rights will be mashed into paste! / red robot: he connects with the common robot on a truly visceral level.
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1016
The Grossest Thing You Can Think Of [[Lil' Sis and I.R. Pete chatting]] / Lil' Sis: I have a challenge for you. / I.R. Pete: A challenge you say? / Lil' Sis: I hereby challenge you to tell me the *dirtiest* thing you can imagine! / I.R. Pete: Hmm. / I.R. Pete: How about the top of the pump on a bottle of anti-bacterial soap? / I.R. Pete: No one washes their hands before they wash their hands! / Lil' Sis: Not bad. / Lil' Sis: How about 'a baseball bat, a pony & some water-based personal lubricant?'
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1017
the widow list clango: i'll see you later, hon. / maura: kisses, etc.! / electron mike: .oO( now's my chance! ) / electron mike: .oO( if i don't tell her how i feel now, i'm gonna wimp out. ) / electron mike: .oO( i'm just not sure how to /say/ it. ) / {{n/t}} / mike: when your boyfriend dies, can i be on your "widow list?"
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1018
no social skills maura: i really don't want to talk about this. / mike: but it's so simple! / mike: if your boyfriend dies, you just call me up and i'm there. / mike: no muss, no fuss, no expectations aside from death and taxes. / mike: and you can usually avoid the taxes with a little estate planning! / {{n/t}} / mike: heh? / maura: do i have a sign on my back? / mike: ? / maura: does it say, "flirt with me if you have no social skills"?
http://dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1019
 

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