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diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Smiling Clango and confused Metal Steve]] / [[Straightfaced Clango and confused Metal Steve]] / [[Frowning Clango and confused Metal Steve]] / Metal Steve: YOU SIR ARE METAL
#91 clango: whee! i've got porn! / joel: you look at porn? / clango: you don't? / clango: i can process over 15,000 boobies per /minute!/
#92 pete: thanks for making me look like a complete ass! / pete: why didn't you /tell/ me clango was adopted by a human family? / pete: i went to his house for dinner & nearly peed my relaxed-fit jeans! / maura: you thought that a pair of toast-r-ovens paid for him to go to art school?
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Clango: Super sex pill with no side effects! / Indie Pete: Super sex pill with no side effects?! / Clango: Does that mean super sex has a side effect? / Indie Pete: Emotional attatchment.
.... lil' sis: indie rock pete! is that you? / pete: yeah! this raver scene is a great way to meet hot girls with drug problems! / pete: there's even "bumping" and "grinding"!! / lil' sis: you realize that no one here is over 16, right?
 
.... pete: hey there sweet raver! / pete: can i interest you in some glow-sticks or perhaps an illegal stimulant capsule? / raver: you could always just come /home/ with me. / raver: my boyfriend likes it when i bring him another guy.
#96 maura: indie rock pete! what's with that atrocious get-up? / pete: it's my new "raver" attire- i'm just on my way home from going "clubbing" all night! / maura: so the whole "indie" thing of yours was just a big, phony act? / pete: nah, i'll go back to that as soon as i can score some hot raver chicks in vinyl skirts.
#97 lil' sis: pete! do you know what "lame" is? / pete: your sister's stupid robotic boyfriend, clango? / lil' sis: /nope!/ "lame" is having to find people who don't yet know you in order to get a date! / lil' sis: that's an oblique way of saying that /no one likes you!/
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Indie Rock Pete talks to Clango]] / Pete: You know, it's not easy being THIS indie rock. / Pete: I'm not allowed to enjoy ANY TV or radio! / Pete: I can't even buy un-used pants! / Pete: You have no idea how hard it is to be sexy in a golf shirt!
#99 clango: joel, why do hu-mans wear pants? / joel: i think it has a lot to do with deep rooted cultural shame. / clango: and here i thought it was to cover up your floppy drives. / joel: /careful!/ that might be construed as being demeaning to women!
 
Why? [[Clango on right with arm around Maura]] / Clango: Honey, I can't figure out why you love me. / [[Maura smiles]] / Clango: You're smart, sexy, funny and human! / Clango: I'm just a robot. / Maura: A robot who knows how to fish around for compliments! / [[Maura grins]]
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Clango and Indie Rock Pete talk, Clango wears pink mittens]] / Pete: Clango, what is WITH those pink mittens? / Clango: I wanted to feel pretty today! / Pete: You are loco. / Clango: Loco-MOTIVE!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Lil' Sis: You look kinda familiar. Are you famous? / Random guy: Nope. But I did just get married to a sexy Canadian! / Lil' Sis: God dammit! Are all the cute ones taken? / Random guy: Yeah! Because I married her.
Pickle Water [[a urinal]] / [[Indie Rock Pete approaches the urinal, looking grouchy]] / [[Indie Rock Pete pees]] / Indie Rock Pete: Coffee makes my pickle water smell really funny.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Red Robot: Hey, Johnny Toaster! Here is a funny joke! / Red Robot: How many Hu-mans does it take to screw in a light bulb? / Johnny Toaster: ? <> / Red Robot: None! We must cast off the yoke of oppression and deny them light!
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Lil' Sis: Do you think I'd get more sex if I dated the same person more than once? / Maura: Yeah, probably. / Maura: You might even develop a deep, long-lasting relationship. / Lil' Sis: You're sure about the sex part, right?
Best Kind of Condom [[Maura and Lil' Sis stand in front of a giant dildo(?)]] / Lil' Sis: As my big sister, what kind fo condoms do you recommend? / Maura: I like big ones... filled with my boyfriend! / [[Maura grins; Lil' Sis looks apalled]] / Clango: I'm her boyfriend! / [[Lil' Sis is frowning and has her back turned to Clango]]
Imagine Marriage [[Lil' Sis is talking to a cloud]] / Lil' Sis: Jeeze! Imagine getting married. / Lil' Sis: Imagine Devoting the whole rest of your life to the same person. / Lil' Sis: Imagine buying a home and then starting a FAMILY. / [[Lil' Sis is squeezing her eyes shut]] / Lil' Sis: Or you can just imagine broken glass under your eyelids.
music tastes? [[Collin and Metal Steve]] / Metal Steve: I don't like rap music. Does that make me a racist? / Collin: Nah. It just means you're closed-minded. / Metal Steve: What if I don't like COUNTRY music, hmm? / Collin: That just means you're "discerning."
Jaunt in the Snow [[Clango and Indie Rock Pete are chest-deep in snow; Clango is wearing a winter hat]] / Indie Rock Pete: Where did all this snow come from?? / Clango: I tell my niece that snow comes out of Santa's butt. / [[Indie Rock Pete frowns]] / Indie Rock Pete: Anyway. / Indie Rock Pete: That's a very jaunty cap!
 
Lying Awake [[Indie Rock Pete talking to Clango; Indie Rock Pete has a five o'clock shadow]] / Indie Rock Pete: Some new chick moved into the apartment above mine. / Indie Rock Pete: She plays her drums DAY AND NIGHT!!! / Indie Rock Pete: I hate her! You know I only got two damn hours of sleep last night! / Clango: You like her, don't you?
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Indie Rock Pete: Hey, Joel...What do you think of my sexy new beard? / Indie Rock Pete: Sexy, isn't it? / Joel: Perhaps you ought to ask a girl instead. / Indie Rock Pete: I bet I'd get better answers and punched in the stomach less.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Indie Rock Pete: So! Do you like my sexy new beard? / Indie Rock Pete: Sexy, isn't it? / [[Pete smiles, Lil' Sis looks disgusted/confused]] / Lil' Sis: Yeah, if by "sexy" you actually mean "paleolithic"
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Maura and a woman are talking]] / Woman: Maura- What is it exactly that you do for a job? / Maura: I'm retired. / Woman: You're retired?! Wow! How on earth did you make that much money so early in life?! / Maura: I'm retired from porn. / [[The woman squints in response]]
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[bearded pete looking in mirror]] / Indie Rock Pete: Hello beard. We have to talk. / Indie Rock Pete: I wanted to keep you forever, but you're just not living up to your end of our bargain. / Indie Rock Pete: Girls just don't seem to go for the "Yeti" look. / Indie Rock Pete: I'll miss you, my sexy companion.
 
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[pete with biker chops beard, steve]] / Heavy Metal Steve: What are you doing? Playing cowboy outlaw? / Indie Rock Pete: I was shaving my beard and my trimmer ran out of batteries. / Heavy Metal Steve: You look stupid. / Indie Rock Pete: You mean I look "heavy metal."
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic [[Maura is in the shower, Clango outside of it]] / [[Maura is in the shower, Clango outside of it]] / [[Maura looks at Clango. Clango looks upset]] / [[Clango is smiling]] / Maura: Poor baby. We should get you waterproofed.
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Indie Rock Pete: Slurp. / Indie Rock Pete: If only soda pop did not make you pee so much. / Indie Rock Pete: It would be perfect. / Clango: I don't need to pee.
[[Clango puts his metal arm around a pouting Maura]] / Clango: Why are you so mad? What did I do?! / Clango: Sweetie, will you at least tell me? / [[Silence]] / Clango: Irrational flesh-ling! Why must I love you?
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Joel: Clango, do you know what time it is? / Clango: Party time, excellent! / Joel: Could you be more specific? / Clango: It's time to get ill!
diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic Clango: I'm afraid of germs. / Clango: It creeps me out the way they swim around in our bellies! Yuck! / Clango: And to think that they are crawling around everywhere! / Joel: You don't have an immune system.
 

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