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crfh.net/d/20000226.html [[Bayside]] / Mike: Will ya look at this place... It's a DUMP! / April: I hope it doesn't rain today... / Roger: Consider yourself lucky and safe from icy asteroids. This was the last hotel room in the whole town, I think. / April: Only two small beds! Where are we gonna sleep? / Roger: Well I don't know where...
crfh.net/d/20000227.html [[Bayside]] / Hotel Manager: I'm the hotel manager! I heard you have a PET in here! Pets are not allowed in this hotel! / Mike: WHAT?? We have no pets! / Hotel Manager: Fine! 'Cause if you did, I'd have to kick you out and give your room to some very rich and desperate students! / Mike: See? No pets. / Hotel Manager:...
crfh.net/d/20000228.html [[Bayside]] / Caption: AT THE EDGE OF TOWN / Milton: E=MC HAMMER / April: GREAT. WE LOSE OUR ROOM AND THERE'S NO VACANCIES. / April: USE YOUR HEAD, April. NEED TO FIND A ROOM... / April: ...AND FAST. / Milton: WHY HEL-LO THERE, MY DEAR. I'M MILTON. YOU NEED A PLACE TO STAY? / April: WELL... YEAH. / Milton: YOU'RE IN...
crfh.net/d/20000229.html [[Bayside]] / Milton: "HERE WE ARE... HAGAR HOUSE." / Milton: THIS IS THE COMMON ROOM. WE HAVE A COUCH AND A COUPLE OF NICE CHAIRS. / Roger: BEHAVE. / Milton: BUT OF COURSE YOU CAN SLEEP IN MY ROOM. / Mike: AND NOW HE OFFERS US HIS ROOM! IS THIS GUY A PEACH OR WHAT? / Milton: WHO THE HELL IS THAT? / Bonnie: DOES IT...
crfh.net/d/20000301.html [[Bayside]] / Milton: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL THAT?? / Bonnie: FRENCH TICKLER WITH A COUNTER-CLOCKWISE SWIRL. / Joe: OH YEAH... / Milton: LISTEN, SPINACH-CHIN! YOU CAN'T JUST WALTZ IN HERE AND START KISSING OUR WOMEN! / Joe: SHE KISSED ME, YOU LOLLIPOP GUILD REJECT! / Milton: YOU MAMMA! / Joe: YOU FAMILY! / Mike:...
 
crfh.net/d/20000302.html [[Bayside]] / Bonnie: WHEN I'M DONE WITH OU, THEY'LL HAVE TO SEND IN A PEROXIDE WASTE DISPOSAL TEAM TO HAUL YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE! / April: GRR! / April: I'M GOING TO HURT YOU SO BAD THEY'LL HAVE TO CONTINUE THE PAIN ON THE NEXT WOMAN! / Sounds: BLAM! OOF! AUGH! EEK BRRRRR! ZAP! DOINK! YIPES / Sounds: MEDIC!! EEP!...
crfh.net/d/20000303.html [[Bayside]] / Bob: MAN I COULD USE A BEER AROUND NOW. BUT FIRST A PITSTOP. / Bob: BLINK BLINK / Roger: FLUFFY! SHH! / Bob: ? / Bob: WHAT THE HECK? / Roger: DON'T MIND US! THERE WERE NOW BEDS LEFT. / Door: SLAM! / Roger: SIGH. / Milton: WELL, WELL... STARTING A FIGHT BECAUSE ANOTHER GIRL SLEPT IN MY ROOM? / Bonnie: HARDLY. / Milton:...
crfh.net/d/20000304.html [[Bayside]] / Milton: BLOOD, DEATH AND DAMNATTION! / Milton: So he crawls up here from Losersville and the first thing he does is take my girl away from me! / Milton: In order to restore the order in the universe, I must KILL him! YeAAah! A sacrifice to the elder gods! He shall perish! He shall SUCCUMB!!! / Milton:...
crfh.net/d/20000305.html [[Bayside]] / Jack: Listen Joe, about that Bonnie girl... what kind of nut is she??? She beated up this harmless girl... / Roger: Yeah, April is harmless. Except for that time she was gonna stab me with a screwdriver... / Joe: Shut up, Jack. Bonnie is wonderful, and a great kisser, too... / Jack: I'm telling...
crfh.net/d/20000306.html [[Bayside]] / Milton: OK, HAIR BOY. THAT WAS THE LAST STRAW.... GLOVE. / Caption: PLATEX LIVING GLOVE / Glove: WAP! / Glove: SSSLAP! / Milton: I COULDN'T POSSIBLY PUT INTO WORDS JUST HOW GOOD THAT FELT. / Joe: OH YEAH? GLOVE. / Caption: ARMORED GLOVE / Glove: SLAP! / Glove: CLANG! / Milton: AAAAH! / Milton: THAT IDIOT JOE...
 
crfh.net/d/20000307.html [[Bayside]] / Rob Barns: HELLO, BOYS! I'M ROB BARNS, THE HEAD OF THE BIG NAFTA CONFERENCE. I'M HERE TO VISIT THE LOCAL STUDENTS AND INTRODUCE MYSELF. / Rob Barns: BOY AM I ONE THIRSTY GUY! MIND IF I HAVE SOME OF YOUR DRINK? / Caption: COOOOOL FROSSTY YUM! OOO! / Rob Barns: THANKS! / Joe: SURE. / Rob Barns: GLUG!...
crfh.net/d/20000308.html [[Bayside]] / Joe: THERE WAS ONE LITTLE DETAIL YOU LEFT OUT ABOUT THIS TRIP JACK. / Jack: WHAT? / Joe: THE DEAD GUY! / Jack: TAKE IT EASY, JOE! I KNOW THIS IS UNEXPECTED, BUT WE CAN COME UP WITH SOMETHING TO GET OUT OF THIS MESS. ANY SUGGESTIONS? / Bonnie: WE CAN GO TELL THE AUTHORITIES. / Everyone: NO! / Mike: OR...
crfh.net/d/20000309.html [[Bayside]] / Mike: GREAT. HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET RID OF THOSE FLUNKIES SO WE CAN SNEAK THE BODY BACKSTAGE? / Jack: I'VE GOT AN IDEA. / Jack: HEY BOYS! / Jack: FREE BEER IN THE STUDENT LOUNGE! / Mike: GOOD IDEA. / Hassengruber: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IT IS MY GREAT PLEASURE TO INTRODUCE OUR KEYNOTE SPEAKER... / Hassengruber:...
crfh.net/d/20000310.html [[Bayside]] / Caption: CENSORED / Person: MORONS? / Everyone: MORONS?! / Person: LOSERS??? / Everyone: YAAAAAAAAAY!!! / Person: He's RIGHT!!! From now on, I'm a new man! / Person: HOORAY, Dr. Barns! Bravo! Morons! YeeeAAAAAHHH!! / Person: My God... the pristine beauty of the truth... / Gav: That's it! I'm finishing my...
crfh.net/d/20000311.html [[Bayside]] / April: Does it have to end this way? This SUCKS! / Jack: Well, long-distance relationships suck, too... / April: But they are such a nice couple! / Jack: I thought you hated Bonnie... / April: Oh, I do. So? / Bonnie: Friends? / Joe: Forever. / Joe: Aaaw, what the hell! Just one more for the road... / {{Part...
 
crfh.net/d/20000312.html [[Bayside]] / Milton: All right, cut that OUT already, you two! / Jack: Did you know this moustache has the same effect as a power suit? / Roger: Wow! So you're wearing it all the time? / Jack: Yes! I will finally get some respect! / Person: GAAAH! It's Dr. Barns' GHOST! / Person: Kill him!!! / Mike: Thanks for letting...
crfh.net/d/20000313.html [[Bayside]] / April: THis town is full of weirdos. I'm glad we're finally going home. / Mike: Eeeh... oops! I forgot my wallet! You take the bus, we'll have to catch the next one... / Roger: What do you mean you forgot it? What about that candy bar you bought a while... / Mike: Heheheh! Of course you can have...
crfh.net/d/20000314.html [[Bayside]] / Mike: Okay, what now? Which way? / Roger: That way. / Mike: Are you sure? That's not the ugly side of Bayside... / Roger: I'm not sure. / Mike: What? I thought you DID remember... / Roger: Stop putting pressure on me, Mike. I'm doing the best I can! / Mike: Sorry. I just have this feeling we're being...
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Looking through a chain link fence]] / Mike: This is it? It looks like an abandoned building... / Roger: Positive. It's just a cover. I remember it well... / Mike: How did we end up here anyway? / Roger: I recall we were in a bar with some guy, and then we made a stupid bet, and then he got us here... / Mike:...
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Dave's wearing a paper bag]] / Marsha: Dave? Is that you? / Dave: Hey Marsha! What's up? / Marsha: I can't believe you STILL are wearing that thing over your head! / Dave: I'm too embarassed not to. / Marsha: But THAT's embarassing, too! Don't people say things about you? / [[They're in a store]] / Dave:...
 
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives Marsha: Would you believe it? Dave is losing his mind! He goes with that paper bag over his head everywhere! We oughta do something! / Margaret: Really? Well, if you insist... / <> / Dave: Wha..? / [[Margaret holds a lighter under the paper bag]] / Dave: Hey!!! / Margaret: What? / Marsha: I hope...
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Dave is covering his eyes with one hand, pointing at Margaret with the other as she sets a paper bag on fire.]] / Dave: Margaret, you... you are setting my bag on fire... / Margaret: Of course! This bag nonsense had to end someday, so why not now? / [[Dave crosses his arms over his chest. Margaret...
crfh.net/d/20000319.html [[Bayside]] / Mike: Well, we're on the roof... Climbing the fire escape was not such a bad idea, huh? / Roger: You know what you are? You are SUICIDAL! That thing is so old I was afriad it would snap any second! / Mike: Feh. You and Dave are so pesimistic. Not EVERYTHING has to go wrong EVERY TIME! / Roger:...
crfh.net/d/20000320.html [[Bayside]] / Director: Who the hell are you and what the hell are you doing here? / Mike: It was an accident! I was taking a stroll and then got stuck in one of those revolving doors, and then I began running faster and faster and... / Paul: Answer the question already, you worm! / Mike: Worm??? I'll give you...
crfh.net/d/20000321.html [[Bayside]] / Roger: Shoot! I think they saw me! Time to split! / April: What kind of place is this? Where's Mike? Why is Roger running? / Imaginary Floating Wiser April: The important question is, why are you following them in the first place? / April: Shut up, imaginary floating wiser me! / {{Part of the "We're...
 
crfh.net/d/20000322.html [[Bayside]] / Jimmy: Heeey Mikey! How's it going? What are you up to these days? / Mike: Nothingjustbusyrunningawayfromaguywho'stryingtoKILLME!!! / Jimmy: Paul, what's the matter with you? Shooting one of my best actors... what are you, silly? / Paul: But he just... but he has a...! / Jimmy: Tut-tut. Not a word....
crfh.net/d/20000323.html [[Bayside]] / Roger: Coast is clear... / April: Bummer! Now where did Roger go? And on top of everything I think I'm lost! / April: Things are progressively going downhill here... / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}}
crfh.net/d/20000324.html [[Boys' Apartment]] / Marsha: The fire is spreading quickly! Call the fire department! / Dave: I would, but the phone is on fire! / Marsha: Help me carry some what here, then! / Marsha: Dave, there's not a single container in here! Where do you keep your pots and dishes? / Dave: Pots? Dishes? For God's sake, Marsha......
crfh.net/d/20000325.html [[Bayside]] / Paul: Hey, who are you? I've never seen you around before... / April: Gasp! Uh, that's.. because it's my first day here! / Paul: Oh, so you're the new girl. It's about time! Everybody's waiting for you. / April: Eeeeeh... ohmygosh, I just remembered, I forgot to deactivate a land mine in my kitchen... / Paul:...
crfh.net/d/20000326.html [[Bayside]] / Jimmy: My God, Mikey! The POTENTIAL! In this business, people like you are a mine gold! / Mike: Gee, I can't believe my luck! / Jimmy: Bobby! We have the star of our next film! / Jimmy: Hey Bobby, look at this thing! Isn't it great? / Jimmy: C'mon Bobby, the japanese love this stuff! / Bobby: Well...
 

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