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| [[Bayside]] / Mike: Will ya look at this place... It's a DUMP! / April: I hope it doesn't rain today... / Roger: Consider yourself lucky and safe from icy asteroids. This was the last hotel room in the whole town, I think. / April: Only two small beds! Where are we gonna sleep? / Roger: Well I don't know where YOU are gonna sleep, but I know I'm NOT sleeping in the bathtub! There's a dead rat in there! / Mike: But that's actually a good thing! If you think about it, mints under the pillow are really lame. / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Hotel Manager: I'm the hotel manager! I heard you have a PET in here! Pets are not allowed in this hotel! / Mike: WHAT?? We have no pets! / Hotel Manager: Fine! 'Cause if you did, I'd have to kick you out and give your room to some very rich and desperate students! / Mike: See? No pets. / Hotel Manager: How about that rock? Is that, perchance, a PET ROCK? / Mike: No, that's um, a... paperweight. / Hotel Manager: A paperweight THIS size? / Mike: Well, we have big papers... / Hotel Manager: And you polish your paperweights regularly, I see... / Mike: You mean you don't? / Hotel Manager: And so, if it's NOT your pet, I suppose you won't mind if I throw it outta the window... / Mike: If you are so compelled to make a fool of yourself... / Roger: No! Fluffy! / Mike: April! Why did you let him go? / April: I tried to hold him, but he bit my hand! / Roger: Give back my friend, you philistine! / Hotel Manager: I knew it! Out Out OUT! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Caption: AT THE EDGE OF TOWN / Milton: E=MC HAMMER / April: GREAT. WE LOSE OUR ROOM AND THERE'S NO VACANCIES. / April: USE YOUR HEAD, April. NEED TO FIND A ROOM... / April: ...AND FAST. / Milton: WHY HEL-LO THERE, MY DEAR. I'M MILTON. YOU NEED A PLACE TO STAY? / April: WELL... YEAH. / Milton: YOU'RE IN LUCK. MY PLACE IS AVAILABLE. / April: ! / Mike, Roger: PERFECT!! / Jack: DUDE, CALM DOWN. IT'S NOT THAT BAD... / Joe: NOT THAT BAD?!? NOT THAT BAD? / Joe: CRIMINY, JACK! WE'RE AT THE THRESHOLD OF HELL! / Joe: AND, TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, I COULD HAVE BEEN OUT TONIGHT WITH MARLENE "SHORT SKIRT AND HEAVENLY LEGS" TRUMAN, INSTEAD OF BEING STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF B.F.E. WITH NO PLACE TO STAY! / Bonnie: HEY... / Bonnie: DID YOU GUYS SAY YOU HAD NO PLACE TO STAY DURING THIS CONFERENCE? / Jack: WELL, ACTUALLY... MMPH! / Joe: YEAH... WE MAY END UP SLEEPING IN THE CAR... / Jack: MMPH! / Joe: OH, AND DON'T MIND MY FRIEND... HE'S SIMPLE. / Bonnie: Poor guys. But Milton's such a jerk, he'd have a cow if I invited them to my place... / Milton: They are here for the conference and don't have a place to stay, and so I thought: "Hey, college students have to STICK together..." got it? / Bonnie: Wha? / Bob: Oooh yeah! / Bonnie: The two of you! Into the house! NOW! / Jack: Wow! She wants you badly, Joe... / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Milton: "HERE WE ARE... HAGAR HOUSE." / Milton: THIS IS THE COMMON ROOM. WE HAVE A COUCH AND A COUPLE OF NICE CHAIRS. / Roger: BEHAVE. / Milton: BUT OF COURSE YOU CAN SLEEP IN MY ROOM. / Mike: AND NOW HE OFFERS US HIS ROOM! IS THIS GUY A PEACH OR WHAT? / Milton: WHO THE HELL IS THAT? / Bonnie: DOES IT MATTER? / Milton: YEAH, IT DOES! / Milton: THEY'RE TOTAL STRANGERS! / Milton: THE BLOND ONE COULD BE AN AXE MURDERER FOR ALL YOU KNOW! / Bonnie: FUNNY... I PROBABLY COULD SAY THE SAME THING TO YOU... / Milton: I'M NOT LIKING THIS ONE BIT, BONNIE. / Bonnie: WHY? ARE YOU JEALOUS? / Milton: HARDLY. / Joe: UH, BONNIE? / Joe: WHERE'S THE BATHROOM? / Joe: ! / Mike: Maybe I'm paranoid about the porno flick, but I have the feeling everybody here is looking at me funny... / Roger: Oh, I get the same feeling too, Mike. / Roger: And YOU don't have a midget in a dog suit following you around. / Barnie: Hey you! You, the weird-lookin' guy! Is that thing edible? / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Milton: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL THAT?? / Bonnie: FRENCH TICKLER WITH A COUNTER-CLOCKWISE SWIRL. / Joe: OH YEAH... / Milton: LISTEN, SPINACH-CHIN! YOU CAN'T JUST WALTZ IN HERE AND START KISSING OUR WOMEN! / Joe: SHE KISSED ME, YOU LOLLIPOP GUILD REJECT! / Milton: YOU MAMMA! / Joe: YOU FAMILY! / Mike: HEY GUYS! WHAT'S GOING ON? / Joe: IS IT ME... OR DOES THIS GUY LOOK VERRRRY FAMILIAR? / Milton: NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT... / Joe: AND THEN SHE KISSED ME! / Bob: SHE KISSED YOU?!? / Joe: YEAH... IT WAS KINDA NICE... / Bob: HOW DID Milton TAKE IT? / Joe: THE SHORT GUY? WELL, WE HAD WORDS AND THEN HE WALKED OFF, MUTTERING TO HIMSELF... / Bob: OH, MAN... THIS AIN'T GOOD... / Joe: WELL, I'M SURE THAT HE'S CALMED DOWN BY NOW... / Bob: UH... DON'T BET ON IT... / Caption: EVEN AS THEY SPEAK... / Milton: HE MUST DIE! / Caption: Next morning... / Bonnie: Did...you...sleep...in...Milton's...room? / April: Well, yeah, but... / Bonnie: That's just ALL I needed to KNOW!!! / April: Whoa! OW! Who opened the cage door? Milton, please control your PSYCHOPATHETIC girlfriend! / Bonnie: Save your screams for later, the pain hasn't started yet! / Someone: BRING IN THE MUD! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Bonnie: WHEN I'M DONE WITH OU, THEY'LL HAVE TO SEND IN A PEROXIDE WASTE DISPOSAL TEAM TO HAUL YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE! / April: GRR! / April: I'M GOING TO HURT YOU SO BAD THEY'LL HAVE TO CONTINUE THE PAIN ON THE NEXT WOMAN! / Sounds: BLAM! OOF! AUGH! EEK BRRRRR! ZAP! DOINK! YIPES / Sounds: MEDIC!! EEP! OOF! / Bob: THIS WOULD MAKE ONE HELLUVA PORNO FLICK, DON'T YOU THINK? / Joe: BONNIE! CALM DOWN! / Bonnie: YOU DIRTY TRAMP! I'LL X!&#$ KILL YOU! / April: WHY IN GOD'S NAME DID I AGREE TO STAY HERE? / Joe: WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT? / Bonnie: UH... NOTHING / Bonnie: SAY, CAN YOU BRING ME A WASHCLOTH? I NEED TO CLEAN UP. / Joe: SURE. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. / George: DAMN IT! WE FINALLY GET A CAT FIGHT HERE AND WE MISS THE WHOLE THING! / Barney: I KNEW WE SHOULDN'T HAVE MADE POPCORN! / Joe: I need a washcloth for Bonnie! Now where the hell... / Joe: Waah! What are you doing there? / Roger: My evil roomies make me sleep in the bathtub, and now I can't sleep anywhere else. / Joe: Mmh. Yeah, right. Say, have you seen a washcloth around? / Roger: First, allow me to introduce ourselves. I'm Roger, and this is Fluffy, my pet rock. Fluffy, this is some guy with a weird hairdo I just met. / Joe: Look, I don't have time for all this freakish stuff. Bonnie needs me... / Roger: Freakish??? Hey, YOU are the guy with the weird hairdo... / Joe: The name is JOE, and forget it! JUST FORGET IT! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Bob: MAN I COULD USE A BEER AROUND NOW. BUT FIRST A PITSTOP. / Bob: BLINK BLINK / Roger: FLUFFY! SHH! / Bob: ? / Bob: WHAT THE HECK? / Roger: DON'T MIND US! THERE WERE NOW BEDS LEFT. / Door: SLAM! / Roger: SIGH. / Milton: WELL, WELL... STARTING A FIGHT BECAUSE ANOTHER GIRL SLEPT IN MY ROOM? / Bonnie: HARDLY. / Milton: DO I DETECT A NOTE OF JEALOUSY? / Bonnie: OH, GO TO HELL. / Milton: ADMIT IT, BONNIE... YOU REALLY DO CARE ABOUT ME, DON'T YOU? / Joe: HI, BONNIE... HERE'S THE WASHCLOTH YOU WANTED. / Milton: DAMMIT!! NOT AGAIN! / Jack: Hey, I HAVE seen you before! You were in that movie wehre... / Mike: Maybe yes, and maybe not. But if you eve say a word about it to any living soul, I'll rip your guts out, chew 'em, and spit them out! / Jack: MMPH! / Mike: But now that I think about it, that was one pretty AWFUL, GROSS and DISGUSTING threat... / Jack: But now I've got a closer look, I seem to recall that Jack Palance looked a little bit older. / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Milton: BLOOD, DEATH AND DAMNATTION! / Milton: So he crawls up here from Losersville and the first thing he does is take my girl away from me! / Milton: In order to restore the order in the universe, I must KILL him! YeAAah! A sacrifice to the elder gods! He shall perish! He shall SUCCUMB!!! / Milton: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA / Milton: HA HA HAH! / Roger: Wow... If Joe heard that, his hairdo would get taller... / Jack: No sir I don't like it! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Jack: Listen Joe, about that Bonnie girl... what kind of nut is she??? She beated up this harmless girl... / Roger: Yeah, April is harmless. Except for that time she was gonna stab me with a screwdriver... / Joe: Shut up, Jack. Bonnie is wonderful, and a great kisser, too... / Jack: I'm telling you, she's evil! / Joe: Why are you telling me all this? Oh, wait a sec, I KNOW... you're JEALOUS! Because I finally found a girl... / Joe: A beautiful angel of kindness and grace, who rescued us from the filthy streets, asking nothing in return... and... and... she french-kisses, too! / Jack: I'm telling you, Joe, that girl is evil! She...she clubs baby seals! She puts little piles of rocks around my bed! She... / Joe: I'm not listening! BLAH BLAH BLAH! / Bonnie: Oh Joe, I heard everything! Do you really love me that way? / Joe: Yeeep... / Jack: You see? She's evil! She was EAVESDROPPING! Unethical! Unethical! / Roger: Big uh-oh. At least he'll die happy. / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Milton: OK, HAIR BOY. THAT WAS THE LAST STRAW.... GLOVE. / Caption: PLATEX LIVING GLOVE / Glove: WAP! / Glove: SSSLAP! / Milton: I COULDN'T POSSIBLY PUT INTO WORDS JUST HOW GOOD THAT FELT. / Joe: OH YEAH? GLOVE. / Caption: ARMORED GLOVE / Glove: SLAP! / Glove: CLANG! / Milton: AAAAH! / Milton: THAT IDIOT JOE PROBABLY THINKS THIS BATTLE WILL BE FOUGHT PHYSICALLY. / Milton: MY VAST INTELLECT WILL NOT ONLY BEST HIM, BUT CRUSH HIM AS WELL! / Milton: ONE SIP FROM THIS WILL PUT LOVERBOY OUT OF THE PICTURE... / Milton: AND BONNIE WILL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO COME BACK TO ME! / Milton: ONLY I CAN TREAT BONNIE WITH THE LOVE AND RESPECT SHE DESERVES! / Milton: WHICH REMINDS ME... I WONDER IF THE SECURITY CAMERA I PUT IN HER SHOWER TURNED UP ANYTHING... / Milton: Care for a beverage? / Joe: YOU are offering me a drink? YOU??? / Milton: I want to apologize for slapping you. / Milton: I've decided to step aside and let Bonnie be happy. That's the important thing. Here's to Bonnie, the best french-kisser in all the county. / Doorbell: ding dong / Joe: I'll drink to THAT! / Doorbell: ding dong / Joe: Ain't you gonna get the door? / Milton: Just drink the whole thing already, DAMMIT! / Doorbell: ding dong / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Rob Barns: HELLO, BOYS! I'M ROB BARNS, THE HEAD OF THE BIG NAFTA CONFERENCE. I'M HERE TO VISIT THE LOCAL STUDENTS AND INTRODUCE MYSELF. / Rob Barns: BOY AM I ONE THIRSTY GUY! MIND IF I HAVE SOME OF YOUR DRINK? / Caption: COOOOOL FROSSTY YUM! OOO! / Rob Barns: THANKS! / Joe: SURE. / Rob Barns: GLUG! GLUG! GLUG! / Milton: HOLD IT! / Rob Barns: CHA-CHING! / Rob Barns: FWUMP! / Milton: HE JUST CROAK? / Joe: I THINK SO. / Milton: HE DOES LOOK FAMILIAR. / Joe: SURE DOES. / Mike: ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! / Joe: OH, MAN... I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS... / Bonnie: HOLD ME! / Milton: GRRR. / Jack: I DON'T KNOW, YOU GUYS... I JUST DON'T SEE THE RESEMBLANCE. / April: ROGER, QUIT POKING THE BODY WITH THAT STICK! / Roger: I JUST WANT TO BE SSURE HE'S DEAD! / Joe: Milton, you BORGIA! You tried to poison me and you killed the wrong guy! / Roger: Yeah, Milton. What the hell were you thinking, man? / Milton: What??? But it was just a bunch of laxatives! / April: Here in the wristband it says he's allergic to everything except pollen. / Joe: So he was allergic to it! You still killed him, you murderer! / Roger: Uh-oh, Milton. / Milton: Me?? You were the one who gave him the drink! / Roger: Gee, he's got a point there, Joe.... / Milton, Joe: Shut UP, Roger! / Roger: You see, April? This is what happens when you try to help ungrateful people... / April: You mean, when you stick your nose in male territory fights? / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Joe: THERE WAS ONE LITTLE DETAIL YOU LEFT OUT ABOUT THIS TRIP JACK. / Jack: WHAT? / Joe: THE DEAD GUY! / Jack: TAKE IT EASY, JOE! I KNOW THIS IS UNEXPECTED, BUT WE CAN COME UP WITH SOMETHING TO GET OUT OF THIS MESS. ANY SUGGESTIONS? / Bonnie: WE CAN GO TELL THE AUTHORITIES. / Everyone: NO! / Mike: OR WE CAN SIMPLY SACRIFICE THE BODY TO- / Everyone: HUH?? / Mike: NEVERMIND. / Barney: WE COULD FRY HIM UP CAJUN-STYLE WITH- / Milton: BARNEY! BAAAAD BADGER!! / Roger: FLUFFY SUGGESTS THAT JACK IMPERSONATE BARNS AND GIVES HIS SPEECH WHILE WE SNEAK TO BODY BACKSTAGE. ONCE THE SPEECH IS DONE, JACK BOLTS OUT OF SIGHT AND EVERYONE FINDS BARNS' BODY WITH A SUICIDE NOTE... OR NOT. / Everyone: YES! / Jack: NO / Jack: WHY DO I HAVE TO DO THIS? / Joe: CRIMINY... JACK, YOU LOOK EXACTLY LIKE THIS GUY! ALL YOU NEED IS A MOUSTACHE! / Jack: HE DOESN'T LOOK LIKE ME AT ALL! / Joe: DAMMIT, JACK! WE DON'T HAVE TIME TO ARGUE! / Joe: GET DRESSED, ALREADY! BONNIE AND I ARE GOING OUT FOR TACOS. WE'LL BRING YOU ONE BACK. / Jack: EWWWW! HE'S WEARING PANTIES AND A GARTER BELT! / Jack: I can't do this, Mike. What if the moustache falls off? What if...? / Mike: What can be more secure than chewing gum holding it in place? Calm down, you dork! / Hassengruber: Dr. Barns! Where have you been hiding, you old fool? Everybody's waiting for you! / Jack: Et-eet-eet! GasP! Oirp! / Hassengruber: Are you feeling okay, Dr. Barns? / Mike: Oh, he's fine. He's just speaking in tongues... / Jack: Eep! / Mike: Dr. Barns has to save his eloquence for the speech, so seeyaroonie! / Jack: Oock, zort! / Hassengruber: Um, Dr. Barns? You have gum under your moustache. / Mike: Oh yeah! He always saves it there for later... / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Mike: GREAT. HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET RID OF THOSE FLUNKIES SO WE CAN SNEAK THE BODY BACKSTAGE? / Jack: I'VE GOT AN IDEA. / Jack: HEY BOYS! / Jack: FREE BEER IN THE STUDENT LOUNGE! / Mike: GOOD IDEA. / Hassengruber: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IT IS MY GREAT PLEASURE TO INTRODUCE OUR KEYNOTE SPEAKER... / Hassengruber: DR. ROBERT BARNS. / Jack: UM... THANK YOU, PROFESSOR HASENPFEFFER. / Hassengruber: HASSENGRUBER! / Jack: WHATEVER... / Jack: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I... UH... I... ER, I WOULD LIKE... UM... / Jack: FOLKS, I HAD A WHOLE SPEECH PLANNED, BUT INSTEAD I'M GONNA SPEAK FROM THE HEART... / Jack: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... / Jack: YOU'RE ALL MORONS! / Jack: You call yourselves STUDENTS? You're disgraceful! In fact, if YOU are the future, I will NOT be around to see it! It makes me feel like ENDING IT ALL!!! / Jack: So GOOD-BYE, LOSERS!!! A-HAHA-HA HAHAHA! / Joe: That was SO totally unnecessary, Jack... / Mike: I think the speech RULED! Way to go, Jack! / Jack: Heh. I always wanted to say that in front of a really big crowd... / Milton: Just put the body there and let's scram! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Caption: CENSORED / Person: MORONS? / Everyone: MORONS?! / Person: LOSERS??? / Everyone: YAAAAAAAAAY!!! / Person: He's RIGHT!!! From now on, I'm a new man! / Person: HOORAY, Dr. Barns! Bravo! Morons! YeeeAAAAAHHH!! / Person: My God... the pristine beauty of the truth... / Gav: That's it! I'm finishing my doggone thesis right NOW! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / April: Does it have to end this way? This SUCKS! / Jack: Well, long-distance relationships suck, too... / April: But they are such a nice couple! / Jack: I thought you hated Bonnie... / April: Oh, I do. So? / Bonnie: Friends? / Joe: Forever. / Joe: Aaaw, what the hell! Just one more for the road... / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Milton: All right, cut that OUT already, you two! / Jack: Did you know this moustache has the same effect as a power suit? / Roger: Wow! So you're wearing it all the time? / Jack: Yes! I will finally get some respect! / Person: GAAAH! It's Dr. Barns' GHOST! / Person: Kill him!!! / Mike: Thanks for letting us stay here, Milton... / Milton: Yeah yeah. Anytime. Now leave before someone gets killed. / April: SNARRL! / Bonnie: HSSSS! / Bob: Before you leave I want to ask you what's with the fake tentacle? / Mike: It's not a fake tentacle... what's with the midget in the dog suit? / Barney: WHAT??? FYI, I'm a talking badger, you idiot! / Mike, Bob: Yeah, whatever... / Bonnie: Hey, you were in a porno movie, right? Can I have your autograph? / Barney: I never felt so insulted in my WHOLE life!!! / {{Part of the "JA/LAB/CRFH Crossover" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / April: THis town is full of weirdos. I'm glad we're finally going home. / Mike: Eeeh... oops! I forgot my wallet! You take the bus, we'll have to catch the next one... / Roger: What do you mean you forgot it? What about that candy bar you bought a while... / Mike: Heheheh! Of course you can have the candy bar, Roger, my buddy! Here! / April: Well, if you run really fast, you might be able to catch my bus... / Mike: Yeah, sure, we'll try... but don't wait for us! See ya later! / Roger: Mmph! / Mike: HAHA! We're April-free! / Roger: You could have taken the wrapper off, you know... / Mike: What? C'mon. The wrapper is the best part... / Roger: Duuuh! Of course! I wanted to save it for later! / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Mike: Okay, what now? Which way? / Roger: That way. / Mike: Are you sure? That's not the ugly side of Bayside... / Roger: I'm not sure. / Mike: What? I thought you DID remember... / Roger: Stop putting pressure on me, Mike. I'm doing the best I can! / Mike: Sorry. I just have this feeling we're being followed. / April: If they thought they were gonna fool me THAT easily, boy, I really need to dye my hair black... / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives | [[Looking through a chain link fence]]
/ Mike: This is it? It looks like an abandoned building...
/ Roger: Positive. It's just a cover. I remember it well... / Mike: How did we end up here anyway?
/ Roger: I recall we were in a bar with some guy, and then we made a stupid bet, and then he got us here... / Mike: All right! That fire escape looks like the perfect way to sneak in...
/ Roger: It looks like a perfect way to kill ourselves in a rusty, impaling death. http://crfh.net/d/20000315.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives | [[Dave's wearing a paper bag]]
/ Marsha: Dave? Is that you?
/ Dave: Hey Marsha! What's up? / Marsha: I can't believe you STILL are wearing that thing over your head!
/ Dave: I'm too embarassed not to.
/ Marsha: But THAT's embarassing, too! Don't people say things about you? / [[They're in a store]]
/ Dave: Yeah, but they are more, like, the subtle kind...
/ Cashier: $4.99, please. So, what's it gonna be, plastic or paper? HAHAHA!!! http://crfh.net/d/20000316.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives | Marsha: Would you believe it? Dave is losing his mind! He goes with that paper bag over his head everywhere! We oughta do something!
/ Margaret: Really? Well, if you insist... / < http://crfh.net/d/20000317.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives | [[Dave is covering his eyes with one hand, pointing at Margaret with the other as she sets a paper bag on fire.]]
/ Dave: Margaret, you... you are setting my bag on fire...
/ Margaret: Of course! This bag nonsense had to end someday, so why not now? / [[Dave crosses his arms over his chest. Margaret tosses the burning bag aside and Marsha looks on in horror.]]
/ Dave: Well go ahead! I have more bags! Hundreds! Thousands! In a huge pile, right behind you, don't you see them?
/ Margaret: Oh yeah? Whoa! Yeowwwch!
/ Marsha: Margaret! Watch out! / [[All three stare in horror as something catches fire.]]
/ Dave: GAAAAAAAH!!!
/ Margaret: Ee-YIKES!
/ < http://crfh.net/d/20000318.html |
| [[Bayside]] / Mike: Well, we're on the roof... Climbing the fire escape was not such a bad idea, huh? / Roger: You know what you are? You are SUICIDAL! That thing is so old I was afriad it would snap any second! / Mike: Feh. You and Dave are so pesimistic. Not EVERYTHING has to go wrong EVERY TIME! / Roger: Mike, you're standing on a... / Roger: ...skylight... / Mike: Gaaaaaah!!! / Glass: CRASH! / Director: CUT! / Mike: Not EVERY time... Not EVERY time... / Woman: Get off me! Get off me, damn you! / Man: This... was... not... in... the... script... / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Director: Who the hell are you and what the hell are you doing here? / Mike: It was an accident! I was taking a stroll and then got stuck in one of those revolving doors, and then I began running faster and faster and... / Paul: Answer the question already, you worm! / Mike: Worm??? I'll give you worm, you...! / Mike: And the Unsmooth Move of the Year Award goes to... Mike! / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Roger: Shoot! I think they saw me! Time to split! / April: What kind of place is this? Where's Mike? Why is Roger running? / Imaginary Floating Wiser April: The important question is, why are you following them in the first place? / April: Shut up, imaginary floating wiser me! / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Jimmy: Heeey Mikey! How's it going? What are you up to these days? / Mike: Nothingjustbusyrunningawayfromaguywho'stryingtoKILLME!!! / Jimmy: Paul, what's the matter with you? Shooting one of my best actors... what are you, silly? / Paul: But he just... but he has a...! / Jimmy: Tut-tut. Not a word. You don't want to make me mad, do you? / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Roger: Coast is clear... / April: Bummer! Now where did Roger go? And on top of everything I think I'm lost! / April: Things are progressively going downhill here... / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Boys' Apartment]] / Marsha: The fire is spreading quickly! Call the fire department! / Dave: I would, but the phone is on fire! / Marsha: Help me carry some what here, then! / Marsha: Dave, there's not a single container in here! Where do you keep your pots and dishes? / Dave: Pots? Dishes? For God's sake, Marsha... we are GUYS! We eat directly from the can! / Margaret: Cut out the bull and help me with this sheet! / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Paul: Hey, who are you? I've never seen you around before... / April: Gasp! Uh, that's.. because it's my first day here! / Paul: Oh, so you're the new girl. It's about time! Everybody's waiting for you. / April: Eeeeeh... ohmygosh, I just remembered, I forgot to deactivate a land mine in my kitchen... / Paul: Sorry, there's no time now... / April: And may I ask, why does this make you SO STINKIN' happy??? / Imaginary Floating Wiser April: Because I told you so? Nyah! / Arrow: Imaginary Floating Wiser April / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
| [[Bayside]] / Jimmy: My God, Mikey! The POTENTIAL! In this business, people like you are a mine gold! / Mike: Gee, I can't believe my luck! / Jimmy: Bobby! We have the star of our next film! / Jimmy: Hey Bobby, look at this thing! Isn't it great? / Jimmy: C'mon Bobby, the japanese love this stuff! / Bobby: Well Jimmy, I don't like tentacles, but I've always said, any money-bringin' freak is always freakin' welcome! / Mike: Actually, I.... / Jimmy: Shut up! You don't want to make me mad, do you? You'll be the tentacled pizza guy... / Tentacle: Wigglety Wigglety / Jimmy: And here's the schoolgirl! / Mike: Holy...! / April: Whoa, dja vu.... / {{Part of the "We're gonna do WHAT???" storyline}} | |
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