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| A Loser Is Me | Wayne: Insomnia is rubbish. / Wayne: I woke up really late and now the whole day is gone.
/ Chicken: Wayne. / Chicken: Staying up all night playing 'Kingdom Of Loathing' does not count as insomnia.
/ Wayne: It doesn't? / [Comic links to http://www.kingdomofloathing.com/ ] http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090824 |
| Mistress Song | H: Wayne would like to apologise for being really flaky lately. / H: In mitigation, there's a new tune to listen to, which you can get by clicking this comic. / H: He's probably like to apologise for that too. / [Comic links to http://www.conniptions.org/mp3/mistress2_rough.mp3 ] http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090907 |
| Sucker For Punishment | Wayne: I'm really looking forward to the gig at Cross Kings tomorrow night. / Chicken: I'm sure you are.
/ Wayne: I am. / Wayne: Why wouldn't I?
/ Chicken: I can't imagine. http://conniptions.org/?20090909 |
| It Would Have Been Too Boomy | Chicken: So how did the gig at Cross Kings go last night?
/ Wayne: Loud but good. / Chicken: How loud?
/ Wayne: Well, let's just say I was glad we didn't have a bass player. / Chicken: And how many people came?
/ Wayne: All of them. http://conniptions.org/?20090911 |
| My Ears Have Stopped Bleeding Now | Chicken: You can't seriously be suggesting the volume of last Thursday's gig was so loud that everyone there spontaneously achieved orgasm.
/ Wayne: No. / Wayne: It was a joke.
/ Chicken: It was a crap joke. / Wayne: I know.
/ Chicken: Even for you.
/ Wayne: Thanks. http://conniptions.org/?20090914 |
| It's Only Music If It's Released On A Major Label | Wayne: Lily Allen has hit out at file sharers on her blog. "They are making it harder for new artists to break through," she says. / Wayne: This is odd, considering she got her own breakthrough from a grassroots internet fanbase.
/ Chicken: Uh... / Chicken: Do you really believe that?
/ Wayne: Why would... http://conniptions.org/?20090916 |
| A Shana Tovarrr | Wayne: Crap, it's Saturday morning already. / Wayne: I forgot to do a cartoon.
/ Chicken: This never bothered you before. / Wayne: That's...
/ Chicken: Neither remaining reader will mind.
/ Wayne: ... unfair. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090919 |
| The Stupid - It Hurts | Wayne: I have a question for Lily Allen, James Blunt, Elton John, and all who oppose filesharing. / Wayne: If filesharing is killing the UK music industry... / Wayne: ... why is the UK music industry growing? / [Across bottom: Click comic to read Mike Masnick's Techdirt article on this]
/ [Comic links... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090923 |
| Who Will Bandwidth Squeezing Really Hurt? | Wayne: Shame on you, Billy Bragg. / [Wayne glares at the ground.] / Wayne: "It says here we can only stop the rot with a large dose of law and order..." http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090925 |
| Sorry | Chicken: Wayne. / Chicken: You are being obnoxious on the internet.
/ Wayne: I know. / Chicken: Stop it. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20090928 |
| Acoustic Cruise | Wayne: I'm really looking forward to the gig at the Good Ship in Kilburn on Sunday.
/ Chicken: You always say that. / Wayne: It's true. Plus it's a running gag that also promotes gigs. Pretty clever, huh. / Chicken: Does it work?
/ Wayne: No. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091002 |
| I'm Hoping Not | H: Wayne cannot be here right now. / [H looks to his left] / H: He is very busy moping about and trying to decide if he is depressed enough to buy an electric kazoo. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091005 |
| A Pirate Like You | Wayne: Edwyn Collins has been barred from uploading his tune 'A Girl Like You' to Myspace, because the copyright is claimed by Warners. / Wayne: Actually, they don't own it. Collins does. / Wayne: No wonder the majors are so uptight about copyright theft. It's their biggest earner. / [Across bottom:... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091007 |
| A Balanced Diet | Wayne: I've been really down lately, but today I seem to be a lot better. / Chicken: You're not on the weed again?
/ Wayne: No.
/ Chicken: Liar. / Wayne: Though I did just get some new multi-vitamins.
/ Chicken: Riiiight... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091014 |
| They've Backed Down Now | Wayne: The PRS has threatened a woman working in a shop with prosecution because she was singing while she worked. They said she was singing 'copyrighted' material. / [Wayne glares at floor] / Wayne [in a whisper]: I'm so glad I joined the PRS. / [Comic links to http://www.pirateparty.org.uk/blog/2009/oct/21/prs-threatens-shop-worker-singing/... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091021 |
| One Time At Bandcamp | Wayne: I've finally uploaded both Fit and the Conniptions CD releases to Bandcamp. / Chicken: You've set the minimum price for high quality downloads to zero, haven't you.
/ Wayne: Yes. / Chicken: You are a total idiot.
/ Wayne: I was thinking of setting a price on Monday. / [Comic links to http://fitandtheconniptions.bandcamp.com/... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091106 |
| I Have Had A Cold | Chicken: I'm not sure that starting a blog on Posterous was a good idea.
/ Wayne: Why? / Chicken: You've hardly updated the cartoon since.
/ Wayne: Huh. / Chicken: Actually, I take that back. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091120 |
| Monday's Comic Is A Bit Late This Week | Wayne: I saw this great band called Free Peace at the Bedford in Balham on Sunday night. / Chicken: I bet you did. But so what. It's about 7am on a Tuesday and no-one reads the comic anyway.
/ Wayne: I live in hope. Plus there's an archive. / Chicken: You could try maybe writing and drawing something... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091123 |
| I Am Seriously Not Well Right Now | Wayne: I have reluctantly had to cancel tomorrow's gig at Underbelly as I am ill with a nasty chest infection of some sort. / [Wayne coughs]
/ Chicken: Aren't the promoters those guys?
/ [Wayne coughs] / [Wayne coughs increasingly throughout the chicken's following speech, obscuring most of the text]
/ Chicken:... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091125 |
| Name Your Own Price Downloading Works | Wayne: I won't be retiring to Bermuda any time soon or anything... / Wayne: But I've made more from Bandcamp in the last week than I have from CDBaby in the last year.
/ Chicken: Heh. / Chicken: Making a grand total of about twenty quid.
/ Wayne: Shush. / [Comic links to http://fitandtheconniptions.bandcamp.com/album/bless-your-heart... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091130 |
| I Might Have To Do A Karaoke Thing | H: Wayne cannot be here right now as his left arm has fallen off. Or something. / H: Luckily it has been stuck back on with sticky tape. / H: Thursday's gig should be... interesting. http://conniptions.org/?20091209 |
| Keep It Real, Simon | Wayne: Simon Cowell says the campaign to get Rage Against The Machine to be the UK Christmas number one single is aimed directly at him. Personally. / [Wayne looks at the sky] / Wayne: He's sharp, he is, that Simon Cowell. Whatever you may think of him. http://conniptions.org/?20091216 |
| This Is My Surprised Face | Wayne: The BBC asked Rage Against The Machine to drop the line "Fuck you I won't do what you tell me," from a live version of 'Killing In The Name'. / Wayne: Apparently, they didn't. / Wayne: Which part of "Fuck you I won't do what you tell me" was unclear? http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091218 |
| Looking Forward To 2010 | [Whole comic is a stereogram] / Wayne: Happy New Year! http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20091230 |
| I Am Trying To Draw Again | Narrator: This is Chuckles
/ Chuckles: Hi! / Narrator: Aw look. Chuckles has found a kitten. / [Chuckles kicks the kitten into the air] / Narrator: You're a cunt, Chuckles.
/ [Chuckles beams] http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100106 |
| Still Trying... Very Trying... | Narrator: Hey Chuckles. Why so sad?
/ [Chuckles looks sad] / Narrator: Are you lonely?
/ Chuckles: Yes. / Narrator: Shouldn't have kicked that kitten, then. / Narrator: Cunt.
/ [Chuckles beams] http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100108 |
| Chuckles Goes For A Drive | [Chuckles is driving] / [The driver behind Chuckles is not happy] / [Chuckles is driving very slowly] / [There is a long queue of cars behind Chuckles] / Driver behind Chuckles: @$%"! / [Chuckles beams] http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100202 |
| For any value of 'draw' | Wayne didn't manage to draw a single cartoon in March 2010. / That was crap. / Apologies to both readers. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100331 |
| I Am So Angry I Cannot Make Sense | Wayne: I am so angry about the Digital Economy Bill. / Chicken: You mean the 'Digital Economy Act'. It passed.
/ Wayne: No-one in Parliament gets technology. It's just embarrassing*. / Chicken: A bit how like no-one on Twitter gets Parliament.
/ Wayne: It's different. They work for us.
/ Chicken: If by... http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100412 |
| I'm Back | Wayne: I'm really looking forward to the gig at Babalou on Friday night. / Chicken: You haven't drawn a cartoon in months and now all you have is this. A gig plug?
/ Wayne: Yep. / Chicken: Also your hair is different now.
/ Wayne: I know. I can't draw it yet. http://conniptions.org/index.shtml?20100517 |
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