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| About The Beatles | Vampire Boy: HI THERE ZOMBIE BOY!
/ Zombie Boy: HI THERE VAMPIRE BOY! ... WHAT'S GOING ON? / Vampire Boy: I WAS SITTING IN WOLFBOY'S SEAT AND NOW I'M ALL ITCHY! / Zombie Boy: WELL HE'S GOT LICE, YOU KNOW. HEY, THIS IS LIKE THAT BEATLES SONG!
/ Vampire Boy: HUH?! / Zombie Boy: "ONCE YOU'RE IN HIS ARMCHAIR... http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/beatles/ |
| Customary Agent | Rabid: Travel's TRICKY these days. / Customs Agent: Well, you are a very observant person to NOTICE that. / Customs Agent: But, regardless, you must present satisfactory identification in order to pass through this security checkpoint. / Rabid: Well, I have a driver's license, and a birth certificate,... http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/customary/ |
| The Dinner Party | Dr Quickly: I'm DISPLEASED with this placement.
/ Rabid: The DINNER PARTY is in mere MINUTES. Dear Doctor! How can WE rearrange in TIME to suit your TASTES? / Dr Quickly: There should be SOME fast determination of OPTIMAL SEATING...
/ < http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/dinner/ |
| Economy | Space Frog: I hate to INTERRUPT you two, but I have a FEW COMMENTS that you MIGHT find germane on the very TOPIC AT HAND! / Space Frog: Honk HONK honk honk honk honk honk HONK HONK honk honk honk honk HONK honk HONK HONK honk honk... HONK!!! http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/economy/ |
| Eh | Dr Quickly: Hey, who wants some sauce?
/ Rabid: Hm! / < http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/eh/ |
| Sinister Exaggerator | Rabid: I feel kind of woozy & ill.
/ Rabish: Woah, so do I. / Rabid: There must be something in the air.
/ Rabish: How sinister! / Dr Quickly: Oh no! Our chirality has become incompatible with this universe! / [[Dr Quickly leads the group to a transdimensional portal.]] Dr Quickly: Quickly, my friends!... http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/exag/ |
| Huckle | Huckle Cactus: HUCKLE HUCKLE HUCKLE / Rabid: Shut up shut up SHUT UP! / Rabid: No one wants to hear you saying that FILTHY WORD! / Huckle Cactus: Hhhuuhh... hhhuhhh... / Huckle Cactus: HUCKLE!! / Rabid: FINE! But I'm LEAVING! http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/huckle/ |
| The, or A, Danger of Over-Interpretation | Rabid: There is a fabulous legend about monsters in a cave! And treasure!
/ Rabish: Oooh! / Rabish: This part about climbing down a rope for three days is not "fabulous" per se.
/ Rabid: Sure! "Like in a fable", see? / [[Teatime!]]
/ Rabish: Oh! A little naked bat is in the teakettle
/ Bat: I HAVE NEVER... http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/interp/ |
| OOT | Rabid: Oh, really subtle. / Oot Bottle: ? / Rabid: Sure pretend like you're not... GOD! YOU BOTHER ME! / Oot Bottle: What have I done to deserve this abuse? / Rabid: Nothing really. / Rabid: You're just a big bottle of OOT! http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/oot/ |
| Sinister Forces | Noel Mauvais: SINISTER FORCES! / Dr Quickly: YOUR REIGN OF TERROR CANNOT LAST! / Noel Mauvais: Uhh... why? / [[Dr Quickly smashes Noel's head with a huge hammer.]]
/ Dr Quickly: HA!
/ < http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/sinister/ |
| Li'l Zeno | Zeno's Mom: Li'l Zeno! Dinnertime!
/ Li'l Zeno: Coming, mom! / [[Li'l Zeno is motionless.]] / Li'l Zeno: Oh no! I can't move! I'll miss dinner! / Zeno's Mom: I told you not to hang around that awful Parmenides boy! http://nameremoved.com/extra/oldcomics/zeno/ |
| They mean well... | [[Rabid is lying on his belly in the grass out in a field. A baby bird is lying on its back, crying out.]]
/ Bird: peep peep
/ Rabid: How unfortunate! A wounded baby bird! I will take it to the Doctor, for surely HE will be able to help the poor thing. / [[On his way to Dr Quickly to find help for the... http://nameremoved.com/comics/1/ |
| Soup Meal / Helping Hand | {{title text: Soup Meal}} / [[Rabid stands in his kitchen, beside a large metal pot resting on his old gas range.]]
/ Rabid: I am hungry for soup, so I shall make some in this pot. / [[Dr Quickly stands beside a projection screen which displays a chart comparing the size of the pot to the size of the... http://nameremoved.com/comics/2/ |
| Box of Matches | [[In the early morning light, Dr Quickly sits in a field reading a book, next to a large cardboard box on which the words "fREE KiTTENS" have been written.]] / [[Rabish arrives, and peers into the box.]]
/ Rabish: OH! Well aren't these just the CUTEST little things!
/ Dr Quickly: Yes. / [[Rabish hoists... http://nameremoved.com/comics/3/ |
| Out A Pickle | [[Rabid, sitting at his kitchen table with a spoon in hand]]
/ Rabid: COULD you KEEP it DOWN in there I'M TRYING TO EAT my meal of BEAN PASTE! / [[Dr Quickly and Rabish are in Rabid's pantry. Rabish is carrying a large mallet]]
/ Dr Quickly: Ignore him, dear.
/ Rabish: Ok! / [[Rabish brings the mallet... http://nameremoved.com/comics/4/ |
| Classic Transmitter: A Hot Summer Day | [[Devil stands in a tower.]] / [[Boy stands in a plaza beside the tower.]] / [[Boy looks up at the tower.]] / [[Devil pulls on something attached to his head.]] / [[More pulling, and a sort of grappling hook feeds on a line out of Devil's head.]] / [[Devil lowers the hook down the length of the... http://nameremoved.com/comics/5/ |
| Tenser said the tensor / Meanwhile, in outer space... | {{title text: Tenser said the tensor}} / [[Rabid waves his hands in agitation as Dr Quickly holds a gun to his head and closes his eyes.]]
/ Rabid: Oh my goodness, Doctor! What are you doing?
/ Dr Quickly: I have a most dreadfully annoying tune stuck in my head!! / Rabid: Killing yourself isn't the ans--... http://nameremoved.com/comics/6/ |
| Tea is pretty good stuff. | Dr Quickly: Rabid, lad! Would you care for a cup of fresh tea?
/ Rabid: Oh, I would! Sounds lovely!
/ Dr Quickly: EXCELLENT! / Dr Quickly: Fruitbase or teabush?
/ Rabid: ... You means 'herbal'?
/ Dr Quickly: In a sense, certainly!
/ Rabid: Fruitbase, then! / Dr Quickly: Here you are, then!
/ Rabid: Gracias! / Rabid:... http://nameremoved.com/comics/7/ |
| Considering an agrarian lifestyle / Horsis! | {{title-text: Considering an agrarian lifestyle}} / Rabid: I'm interested in becoming a farmer!
/ Dr Quickly: Oh really? A farmer of what? / Rabid: Well, I was thinking of maybe raising 'beef cattle' but now I'm thinking I'll raise 'turkey cattle'! / Dr Quickly: Turkey meat comes from turkey.
/ Rabid:... http://nameremoved.com/comics/8/ |
| Fresh Dough / My new job kind of sucks... | {{title-text: Fresh Dough}} / Space Frog: I'M NOT MADE OF NOODLES! / Rabid: I'm not looking for... noodles... I'm looking for money. / Space Frog: WHAT? I don't owe you ANYTHING! / Space Frog: ... except noodles. / {{title-text: My new job kind of sucks...}} / [[I'm sitting in a cubicle, talking... http://nameremoved.com/comics/9/ |
| Hygiene is important despite what the Doctor says | [[Dr Quickly has a horrible smell coming from him.]]
/ Dr Quickly (singing): I'd rather do some math - Than take a cleansing bath - But yes, it's true, there're many things I'd rather do than that! / [[Dr Quickly holds a clipboard with the note "EXPERIMENT STATUS: RUINED BY MY STENCH"]]
/ Dr Quickly (singing):... http://nameremoved.com/comics/10/ |
| Two dumb guys at the health centre | [[Two immature young men are standing in front of a large bin of free condoms in the health centre of their college.]]
/ Dude One: Dude!
/ Dude Two: I know, man, that is seriously, like, a BIG NUMBER of condoms. / Dude One: Totally! I've never SEEN so many condoms... uh, at once... / Dude Two: Sure,... http://nameremoved.com/comics/11/ |
| Classic Transmitter: Keys in the Ignition / Trick Visor | {{title-text: Keys in the Ignition}} / [[Boy leans towards a many-legged device.]] / [[Boy addresses it respectfully, while Devil arrives on the scene looking nonplussed.]] / [[Boy crawls under the legs, which seems to shock Devil.]] / [[The device activates, with Boy at the helm. Devil is concerned... http://nameremoved.com/comics/12/ |
| Serenading the Samovar / Head Dread | {{title-text: Serenading the Samovar}} / Rabid: Well how do you make sure the AUTOCLAVE is sterile?
/ Dr Quickly: Oh, that's easy! / [[Dr Quickly gestures at what seems to be a piano.]]
/ Dr Quickly: You use a 'double-manual clavier' -- it's a kind of old-fashioned medical piano. / [[Dr Quickly plays... http://nameremoved.com/comics/13/ |
| Snacks and ladders | Rabot: I wonder what it would be like to be 'hungry'... why don't I just look in the refrigeratron & see if anything activates my fancying circuits... / Rabot: Aha! Some deli meats! Perhaps... if I prepare a sandwich with them! Wait a minute -- if I EAT them I'll NEVER be hungry! / Dr Quickly: Hello... http://nameremoved.com/comics/14/ |
| Standing Ovation | Space Frog: DOCTOR QUICKLY I REQUEST THAT YOU BUILD ME... A CHOKING MACHINE / Dr Quickly: Whyever would you desire such a contraption, Space Frog?
/ Space Frog: THAT'S EASY... / Space Frog: I HAVE ALWAYS WONDERED ABOUT THE... SENSATIONS ASSOCIATED WITH SUCH AN ACTIVITY AND AS I HAVE NO HANDS I LACK... http://nameremoved.com/comics/15/ |
| Securibev and Securibev 2.0 | [[Rabid and Rabish are in a convenience store beside the refrigerators. Rabid holds up a can of carbonated drink.]]
/ Rabid: 'This drink contains security features...'
/ Rabish: What? Why? / Rabid: Apparently to keep the BRAND IDENTITY protected at a HIGH LEVEL -- no sneaking off to the teats of competitors. / Rabish:... http://nameremoved.com/comics/16/ |
| The Bullshit Detector / Pressure | {{title-text: The Bullshit Detector}} / Dr Quickly: Heyo, Rabid! Strut y'self over here an' glutton yer scopers on m'latest invention!
/ Rabid: Okay -- what is it? / Dr Quickly: Why, it is a bullshit detector!
/ Rabid: Extraordinary! Such a device could revolutionize any NUMBER of fields currently weighted... http://nameremoved.com/comics/17/ |
| Antislumbversary | Rabid: Whoa... I've been awake... for like six... or seven years now... I... I wonder if anyone... else knows or realizes... this. Oooh, I'm even expositing... and out loud, to boot. / Rabid: Boy am I tired... doubt I'll... get any sleep, though. Hey, now I'm fore... shadowing... ...ing. / Dr Quickly,... http://nameremoved.com/comics/18/ |
| Twenty-twenty self-regard | Rabid: I am finding it difficult to focus.
/ Dr Quickly: Figuratively or literally?
/ Rabid: The former. / Dr Quickly: Well have I got just th'thing for you!
/ Rabid: Oh? / Dr Quickly: Contact lenses for the soul! I keep them fresh an' warm in this pot of chicken soup. / Dr Quickly: Now, to put them... http://nameremoved.com/comics/19/ |
| Classic Transmitter: Proportions / Freeze Tag | {{title-text: Proportions}} / [[Boy and Devil are talking.]] / [[Devil's body widens much to the surprise of Boy.]] / [[Devil's body now occupies an obtuse portion of the panel's frame.]] / [[Boy pokes Devil's body, in disbelief.]] / [[From a greater distance, it is clear that Devil has not encompassed... http://nameremoved.com/comics/20/ |
| Mother of Season's Cycle | Rabid: What a beautiful day!
/ Dr Quickly: Yes, it most certainly is. / Rabid: Oh dear, the weather is turning...
/ Dr Quickly: To what? / A Voice From The Heavens: VINEGAR WHERE ONCE WAS WINE!! / Dr Quickly: Sky's leaking sour stuff!!
/ < http://nameremoved.com/comics/21/ |
| Synthesis | Rabot: Emotions make me ANGRY!!
/ Rabid: Huh? But you're Rabot -- a robot! You're 'Rabot the Robot Rabid'!
/ Rabot: So WHAT? / Rabid: Well, since when have robots been able to feel emotions?
/ Rabot: Two answers to that. / Rabot: One: since we've been worth talking to. Two: since the invention of the... http://nameremoved.com/comics/22/ |
| Transposition error | Dr Quickly: Egads I'm lonely -- the life of a reclusive MAD SCIENTIST. But this is certainly soluble -- there's no need for me to BE a 'chick magnet' when I can MAKE ONE!! / Dr Quickly: MMMARRRVELOUS! MY MAD MIND MADE ME A MATE MAGNET! (And it only took a couple days!) / Dr Quickly: NOW! THE CONTROLS!!... http://nameremoved.com/comics/23/ |
| Space frog doesn't actually care about your diet | Space Frog: I HEARD YOU ATE A HOT DOG SO HOW WAS IT?
/ Rabid: Uh, it was pretty tasty. / Rabid: There was hot sauce on it and it was really very spicy! / Space Frog: Poor BABY!! WAN' SOME MILK?!
/ Rabid: Uh, no, thank you, I had a cold beverage. / Space Frog: Mm hm, mm hm... / Rabid: 'Mm hm' WHAT?!
/ < http://nameremoved.com/comics/24/ |
| Gone Fishin' | [[In the early morning, Rabid stands at a bus stop in front of a streetcorner cafe. He is wearing a fishing cap, and carring a fishing pole and tackle box.]] / Rabish: Fishing tackle? Worms? An atypical yet contextually appropriate hat? I bet you're going fishing, right? / Rabish: ? / Rabish: Rabid?... http://nameremoved.com/comics/25/ |
| Space Frog is even mean to robots | Space Frog: HONK! I ATE TH'ROBOT PARADE!!
/ Rabot: Gasp! / Rabot: Waaah! Sob sob! Gasp! Waah! Sob cry cry! Waaahhh! Whine! Gasp sob gasp gasp sob CRY!! WAAAAAAAHHHHAGLGLHGH!! / Space Frog: JUST KIDDING!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!! STUPID ROBOTS / Rabot: But -- but you said that if you prefaced a statement... http://nameremoved.com/comics/26/ |
| Doubting the evidence of their senses | Dr. Quickly: Heh heh heh...
/ Rabid: Uh oh -- what is it you've got there? / Dr Quickly: It is a POWERFUL ODOUR ABSORBENT!! / Rabid: Uh, could you maybe wait until AFTER we're done eating? I'm kind of enjoying this meal.
/ Dr Quickly: FINE. / The Waiter: Your cheque, sir... AGH!!
/ < http://nameremoved.com/comics/27/ |
| $0 Initiation Squash / Beanworld-not | {{title-text: $0 Initiation Squash}} / Rabid: I need more exercise. I am weak and limp and unable to... to... PHYSICALLY ACCOMPLISH! / Rabid: Maybe there is a television programme that will help me to motivate.
/ < http://nameremoved.com/comics/28/ |
| Unfamiliar Pastimes | Rabid: This diving board is crapulent! / Rabid: There's not even a swimming pool beneath it! / Dr Quickly: Well, it's actually a game court for a dry-land physical sport -- but here, lad, I'll irradiate the board with plank-lengthening rays.
/ < http://nameremoved.com/comics/29/ |
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