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Rabish up a tree (bad fruit) Fairy: Remember! You must keep me a secret - and may never leave! / << KNOCK KNOCK >> / Rabish: Coming! / Rabish: Yay groceries! You're the best!! / Rabid: Sure, you're welcome... listen, I'm going to leave my ladder here... in case... you know? / Rabid: Bye. / Fairy: More groceries! Aren't you ever...
Hysteria (never existed) Dr Quickly: Oh, Rabish -- I have some good news for you. / Dr Quickly: Your, uh, problem has been dropped from our diagnostic manual, soooooo... / Dr Quickly: You're cured! / Rabish: Yay! / Dr Quickly: Just give this to an orderly, and they'll help you pack up and move out. / [[ Rabish is delightedly...
Hysteria (technology) Rabish: No! He won't 'cause he thinks it's GROSS! - and that I must have, like, defective parts! / Dr Quickly: Okay well let me write you a prescription. / Rabish: For WHAT? / Rabish: Oh! Heh heh... can you really prescribe this? / Dr Quickly: Ha ha yup! / Rabish: Gosh no I don't know WHEN I'll be free......
Hysteria (generally) Rabid: Where's your fancy espresso machine? / Rabish: Heh. / Rabish: That bean junk's so passe -- it's all about frogspit now. / Rabid: Like from a SPACE frog? / Rabish: Yeah, it's got this really cool neuroinhibitor. "Way down" is the new "jacked up", you know. / Narrator: That frog spit stuff caught...
Forgot Why (a life) Rabid: Why'd I come in here? / [[ Rabid fails to notice a handsome globe on a bookshelf. ]] / Rabid: Oh, smell that fresh air! / [[ Rabid sees a painting. ]] / Rabid: Aww! / Cat: MOW / [[ Rabid walks alongside an electrical cable. ]] / [[ Rabid walks through a diner. ]] / Rabid: Cool Game! / Li'l...
 
Forgot Why (senescence) Rabid: Why'd I come in here? / Rabish: That's a sign of old age, you know! / Rabid: What is? / Dr Quickly: Doesn't look good! / Rabid: Oh, when'd they build this hospital? / Rabid: Where are we going? / Rabid: What a funny sign! / Rabid: Whoops! / << SLAM >> / Rabid: Rabish? / Rabid: Uhm, hi? / Other...
Forgot Why (erased) Rabid: Why'd I come in here? / Rabid: This rope must be an aide-memoire... / Rabid: Well it didn't help! / Rabish: ... Don't I know you from somewhere? / Rabid: Doubt it! / Rabid: Hey, you've got a rope, too! / Rabid: WHOA! / << YANK ! >> / Dr Quickly: I know there must be a reason I'm watching this...
Novel Illness (carriage return) Rabid: Whoa! It just happened again! / Rabish: Eh? / Rabid: I should probably go see a doctor... / Rabish: About what? / Rabid: Vertigo, or something. Dizziness. / Rabish: Gosh! / Rabid: I should probably sit down for a minute... / Rabid: Blegh! It just... did YOU feel anything? / Rabish: No! / Dr Quickly:...
Novel Illness (litter) Rabot: I get real itchy, Doc... but... Robots don't GET itchy, do they? / Dr Quickly: Apparently they do. Hold still. / Rabot: Whoa! / Dr Quickly: Awwwww! / Rabish: Why are you in the closet? / Rabot: Doctor's orders! Shhhh... / [[ Rabot opens up. ]] / [[ KITTIES ]]
Novel Illness (ice treat) Rabid: Tell it to me straight, doc. I've got... a horrible disease, don't I? / Dr Quickly: Well, no! Our tests indicate that this is a completely natural phenomenon -- your body decided to extrude... / Dr Quickly: Delicious popsicles! / Rabid: Wow! / Dr Quickly: Oooh, cold headache!
 
Earnestness (triple blind) Noel: It's a lot of money... Wouldn't you rather just name a building after yourself? / Dr Quickly: The drug is completely safe! And anyway, the contract's signed. / Rabid: Rabot, right? Roooom-mate Rabot! / Rabot: Eh. / Rabid: Are you on the food plan? Wanna check out the cafeteria?! / Rabot: Ugh,...
Earnestness (thesis year) [[ Three years later... ]] / Noel: Maybe this wasn't a mistake? Some of these thesis project proposals are AMAZING... / Rabid: Everyone keeps telling me it's a "dying field"... / Rabid: I seriously thought this was an opportunity to enrich peoples' lives -- illustrations CLARIFY and ILLUMINATE! / Rabid:...
Earnestness (years later) [[ Rabot, Rabid, and Rabish are all in their comfort zones. ]] / Rabot: My dealer owns the villa -- lets me stay when he's not using it. I'm not THAT successful! / Rabid: Self-taught programmer, self-employed... debt free and doing really well! / Rabish: I scrape by... done enough work to have some...
Earnestness (hastily called meeting) Noel: Aren't you... worried? / Dr Quickly: Other than drugging some of your students without their consent... did we do anything wrong? / Noel: Uh... / Dr Quickly: If that's the story he's after, we're fine. I can handle that. / Noel: Seriously? / Dr Quickly: You'll feel better after you've eaten some...
Earnestness (whoops) Space Frog: THIS IS JUICY STUFF I'M PUTTING YOU ON SALARY DID YOU KNOW QUICKLY OWNS OUR PUBLISHER / Li'l Beefy: So? / Space Frog: SO THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT AND A HUGE SCANDAL / Li'l Beefy: Ha ha! / Dr Quickly: It occurred to me -- if someone figured out what I was up to and went public with the story... / Dr...
 
Frog Boxen Rabish: Rabid? / Rabish: Oh, there you are. / Rabish: Rabid? / Rabish: Oookay... / Rabid: I want my money back! She could TOTALLY see me! / Space Frog: NOPE / Space Frog: NO REFUNDS AND ANYWAY SHE COULDN'T SEE YOU IT WAS AN OPTICAL ILLUSION / Rabid: Oh!
Consequences of Entertainment Rabid: Ha ha wheee! / << KA BOOM! >> / Rabid: Again! / << KA BOOM >> / Rabid: Yay! / Rabid: That's astonishingly realistic! / Dr Quickly: Well, it should be! / Dr Quickly: It's actually all remote-controlled, not a simulation -- Don't worry, they're all just flash-cloned meat puppets! / Dr Quickly:...
Floating Gift Rabish: Huh? / Rabish: Oooh -- a PRESENT / [[ Rabid floats up out of the box ]]
New Head Day Dr Quickly: Alright, kids -- happy waxing equinox! / Rabid: Yay! / Rabish: New head day is the best day of the YEAR! / Rabid: You said it! / [[ light show ]]
Beefy Swears (cussomancy) Li'l Beefy: Farty pee-splashers! / Li'l Beefy: Cuckolded dog-husbands!! / Li'l Beefy: You kiss your scrotum noses when you talk! / Rabid: RETREAT! RUN!! / Li'l Beefy: POOPY BUTTS!! / [[ The army is dead, defeated. ]]
 
Beefy Swears (at school) Li'l Beefy: Bodily excretions, reproductive organs, reproductive acts. Non-reproductive sexual acts. / Li'l Beefy: A gender, orientation, social class, phenotype, family, affilliation, or preference group that I consider or historically was out-group. / Li'l Beefy: Ostensible negative aspects of that...
Beefy Swears (life's hard) Cutest girl in school: Sorry, Li'l Beefy, but Handsome Johnny already asked me to the dance plus also you're awful. / Dr Quickly: You failed the remedial test, sooo... looks like summer school. / Big Dude: Hey jus so y'know me an a buncha th'guys took turns pissin' on yer backpack. / Angry dog: RAWF...
Hip Crystals (Hott Wizzyrdz) Rabish: So I was all like "No way!" / Suzie: No way! / Suzie: Whoa, check out the MAJOR HUNK! / Rabish: Ooohh? / [[ Rabid is a wizard. ]] / Rabot: So I was all like "No way!" / Li'l Beefy: No way! / Li'l Beefy: Whoa, check out the MAJOR PLAYER! / Rabot: Ohuh? / [[ Rabid is a wizard with a couple hot...
Hip Crystals (get the job done) Rabid: You look ready for your first coffee of the week! / Rabid: Sugar? Cream? / [[ Dr Quickly drops some crazy substance into his coffee. ]] / Rabid: Whoa! Careful -- it's hot! / << SLUG! >> / Dr Quickly: And a fine morning to YOU, old chum! / Dr Quickly: TIME TO GET TO WORK! / [[ Dr Quickly pounds...
Hip Crystals (new teeth) Rabish: Hey, so what's the "exciting news"? / Rabid: Oh... just... / Rabid: NEW TEETH!
 
Rabot's Alone (passing time) [[ Rabot reclines against a rock and watches the clouds pass by. ]] / [[ Rabot fishes in a dry streambed. ]] / [[ Rabot paints a mural of his friends. ]] / [[ Rabot reads "HOW TO BUILD A SPACE SHIP" ]]
Rabot's Alone (permutation) Rabot: Well... here goes... / [[ Rabot uses the "Konami Code". ]] / [[ The universe is empty, now. ]] / Rabot: Ohhh ow... / Passerby: Mister, don't move -- the ambulance will be here in a- / Rabot: I'm FINE, I just... / Rabot: MEAT?! A MEAT body? There's no WAY my whole mind fits in a MEAT brain!...
Rabot's Alone (... woof!) Rabot: Whoa! I left the door open? / Rabot: I was about to get in the shower -- with the door wide open! / Rabot: I ... guess it doesn't matter because everyone but me... is... long dead... / [[ A dog comes in. ]] / Dog: Woof! / Rabot: AAUGH!!
Quickly can help (generally) [[ Doctor Quickly can help with that! ]] / Rabid: Freaking site-specific browser! Load my dang webmail! / Dr Quickly: You whitelisted the cname alias but it immediately redirects to google apps, so you add that, too. / Rabish: My new kitten is refusing to eat his VERY expensive food! / Dr Quickly:...
Quickly can help (he even drew this for me) Me: Doctor Quickly you are so smart; will you help me make a comic? / Dr Quickly: No sweat! / Dr Quickly: Here is my joke are you ready? / Rabid: OK / Dr Quickly: You say "KNOCK KNOCK" / Rabid: "KNOCK KNOCK" / Dr Quickly: Who's there? / Rabid: I don't know! This doesn't make SENSE!! / Dr Quickly: "I...
 

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