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Bees In There (In The Burrito Hive)	[[ A beautiful day, the sun shining on Doctor Quickly's Burrito Hive. ]] / Rabish: Oh! Let's get burritos! / Rabid: Maybe it's been reviewed!! / [[ Two one-star reviews on yelp. ]] / Rabot: Don't go in there. There are bees inside. Only go in if you don't mind bees. Ugh. / Noel: This review will probably get deleted but someone has to speak up. There are so many restaurants in this city that are full of bees and I am sick of dealing with bees and they should have their own restaurants. SORRY IF I OFFENDED YOU / Dr Quickly: Hey, there are people living in this city that AREN'T racist assholes! Welcome! / Rabish: Hi! / [[ A bee holds up a sign. ]] / Sign: WOULD YOU LIKE A SODA http://nameremoved.com/comics/721/
Nothing but Space Frog (pangloss)	Space Frog: WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THIS THE BEST OF ALL POSSIBLE WORLDS / [[ Space Frog comes across a Free Hot Dogs booth. ]] / Space Frog: JUST THE THING I'LL TAKE TEN / Chef Frog: ONLY TEN WHY / Space Frog: AT THE OTHER END OF THE PARK IS FREE CAKE AND I WANT CAKE TOO / Space Frog: DOCTOR SPACE FROG YOU LOOK UPSET HAVE SOME CAKE / Doctor Space Frog: THANKS I AM YAY CAKE / Doctor Space Frog: MY THEORIES PROVE THE EXISTENCE OF PARALLEL DIMENSIONS WHERE NOT EVERYBODY IS A SPACE FROG IT'S HORRIBLE / Space Frog: SOUNDS HORRIBLE / Doctor Space Frog: IT IS / Space Frog: OH NO IT WAS ALL A DREAM THAT'S SO SAD OR WAS IT GASP http://nameremoved.com/comics/722/
Nothing But Space Frog (on TV)	Rabish: What's on TV? / Announcer: Previously, on... FROGS / Space Frog: HEY EVERYBODY LOOK I FOUND A HATCH / << CHEEP CHEEP >> / Space Frog: THE OTHERS TOLD THE HOSTILES THAT THE NUMBERS ON THE HATCH ON THE ISLAND MADE THE MONSTER THE ANGRIEST / Space Frog: THE OKAY / Space Frog: CAN WE STOP HIKING FOR A MINUTE I NEED TO CATCH MY BREATH AND REITERATE MY CHARACTER TRAIT / Space Frog: GOSH IS THIS A FLASHBACK FLASHFORWARD SIDEFLASH DREAM SEQUENCE HALLUCINATION OR VISITATION / Space Frog: OH IT'S JUST A FUNNY LOOKING TREE / Space Frog: YIPE / Space Frog: CHEECH YOU WERE THE SMOKE MONSTER ALL ALONG http://nameremoved.com/comics/723/
Nothing But Space Frog (in Pellucidar)	[[ I hold a copy of Edgar Rice Burroughs' "Pellucidar". A drawing of Rabid petting Space Frog is on the recto.]] / Book: His head as he paced beside me was level with my hip. I laid my hand upon it caressingly. As I did so he turned and looked up into my face, his jaws parting and his red tongue lolling as you have seen your own dog's beneath a love pat. / Book: "Just been waiting all your life to be tamed and loved, haven't you, old man?" I asked. "You're nothing but Space Frog, and the man who put the hyaeno in your name ought to be sued for libel." / Book: Raja bared his mighty fangs with upcurled, snarling lips and licked my hand. / Book: "You're grinning, you old fraud, you!" I cried. "If you're not, I'll eat you. I'll bet a doughnut you're nothing but some kid's poor old Fido, masquerading around as a real, live man-eater." http://nameremoved.com/comics/724/
Violent Video Games (played wrong)	Dr Quickly: Playing violent video games, eh? / Noel: Kind of! / Noel: I'm playing non-violently, just exploring and stuff. / Noel: By defeating the design intentions of the experience I get a more interesting, unanticipated response from the system. / Dr Quickly: That's neat, I guess. Well, here's the jobs section. / Noel: ... thanks. / Video Game: NO! NO! NOT THE... CHAINSAWWWWUGHGH http://nameremoved.com/comics/725/

Violent Video Games (at Customs)	Customs Agent: And what do you do... for fun? / Rabid: I, heh, write fan fiction. / Rabish: I volunteer at shelters! / Dr Quickly: I invent inventions! / Noel: I, uh, um... play violent video games. / Customs Agent: Here are your papers, enjoy your stay! / [[ Mugshots follow. ]] / Rabid: CONFESSED to theft of intellectual property / Rabish: CONFESSED to participation in socialist organizations / Dr Quickly: PROFILE MATCH of loner psychopath anti-state mass-murderer http://nameremoved.com/comics/726/
Violent Video Games (a topic of conversation)	Rabid: They're getting more mainstream -- it's just a matter of time. / Noel: I guess so. / Noel: But you look at, like, sports -- it's assumed you have a favourite team you want to talk about... / Rabid: Not everybody watches the same TV shows... / Rabid: ... and not everyone follows current events! But friendly small talk doesn't have to be about anything but what's right in front of you. / Rabid: Weather, traffic, the change of seasons, your commute... / Noel: Too banal! How will I ever connect with a stranger and make a new friend over the WEATHER?! / Rabid: You're still better off than saying "Frag any good noobs lately?" / Noel: Ha. Anyway, this is my stop -- nice talking to you... / Rabid: Yes, have a good day... XMASSACRE78!! / Noel: W-was that my online arch-nemesis, RABIDDOG88?! http://nameremoved.com/comics/727/
Rabid, trapped in an empty void (no one notices)	Rabid: uggh... / Rabid: W-where am I?! / Rabid: Whoa, nutty. / Rabid: Going around in circles? Who knows! I might as well be on a treadmill! / Rabish: Hey, Doc, have you seen Rabid lately? / Dr Quickly: Eh? Nope. / Rabid: Wonder if I'll start hallucinating from sensory deprivation! / Rabid: I WISH I'd start hallucinating! http://nameremoved.com/comics/728/
Rabid, trapped in an empty void (amusing himself)	[[ Rabid makes a number of funny faces. ]] / Rabid: Whoops. http://nameremoved.com/comics/729/
Rabid, trapped in an empty void (but not alone)	Rabish: Have you seen Rabid lately? / Dr Quickly: Eh? Nope. / Rabid: Wait - why is the light on in my thinking box? / Rabish: Your what? / Dr Quickly: It's -- well, it builds a high-speed pocket universe, sort of an amazingly powerful computer, and I can go in it when I need lots of time and math to solve difficult problems. / Dr Quickly: But it's programmed to only let you out when you've solved your problem... if he didn't have one in mind... / Dr Quickly: Well anyway it would have let him out by now -- billions of years have passed inside since you came in just now. / Rabid: Okay, pause the simulation and extract the sapients currently on-screen. / Rabid: Hey guys! / Dr Quickly: WHAT the ... ! / Rabid: Turns out this thing has enough power to simulate entire universes! / Rabid: Sooo I kept trying until I found the one I came from! Ha! http://nameremoved.com/comics/730/

Rabish's Gift (of ventriloquism?)	Rabish: Y-you can talk?! / Blender: Yup. / Rabish: I gotta show Doctor Quickly! / Blender: That's a good idea. / Dr Quickly: A talking blender? Hogwash! I demand empirical proof! / Blender: HEY! I'M A TALKING BLENDER! CHECK ME OUT! I'VE GOT REAL GOOD AT VENTRILOQUISM FROM PRACTICING SO MUCH ALWAYS NOW!! / Rabish: Wh-- ! / Dr Quickly: Ha ha Ho ho Ha ha! Not bad, you should take that on the road! For a minute there I thought we had BOTH gone quite mad. / Blender: Whoa! Hey! Lady, let's talk about this!! http://nameremoved.com/comics/731/
Rabish's Gift (committed)	[[ At Space Frog Memorial Home for the Lunatic ]] / Rabid: Look -- Dr Quickly made an "insaneometer" so we can finally get you out of here. / Insaneometer: TOTALLY NUTSO -- A COMPLETE LUNATIC / Rabid: That's so weird! The little readout says "completely sane"! http://nameremoved.com/comics/732/
Rabish's Gift (Dr Quickly's Reward)	Rabish: Oh golly, I am SO stressed out! / Rabid: Hey, lady! What's buggin' you? / Rabish: Ah! A t-talking... discarded newspaper! / Rabish: Oh thank goodness. / Dr Quickly: Stress-induced hallucination? That's going to take a number of expensive therapy sessions. / Rabish: O-okay. / Dr Quickly: Here's your twenty. / Rabid: Ha ha the look on her face -- these psych experiments are a riot! http://nameremoved.com/comics/733/
Botched Home Brewing (in the land of spirits)	Rabid: Wow! You MADE this! That's so cool! / Rabid: GLK! / Dr Quickly: I GUESS it might be a little strong. / [[ Meanwhile, in the SPIRIT WORLD ]] / Ghost: Master! A great injustice! A crime! / King Spirit: DOCTOR QUICKLY HAS BROKEN THE COVENANT BETWEEN OUR WORLDS WITH HIS GROTESQUE MOONSHINE!! HE MUST PAY / Dr Quickly: Oh no! An upside-down ghost! / King Spirit: INSOLENT FOOL I AM THE KING SPIRIT / King Spirit: Now endure your ETERNAL PUNISHMENT! / King Spirit: M-my powers have NO EFFECT?! / Dr Quickly: Huh. / Dr Quickly: HA! Probably it's because I'm a... TEETOTALLER! First time that's ever done me any good... / [[ HAVING DEFEATED THE KING, DR QUICKLY IS CROWNED RULER OF THE SPIRIT LAND ]] / Dr Quickly: I do not look like I'm wearing a crown. / Rabid: MORAL: STRIVE FOR GREATNESS, EVEN IN YOUR HOBBIES. WHAT MEANING DOES LIFE HAVE WITHOUT STRUGGLE http://nameremoved.com/comics/734/
Botched Home Brewing (of spells)	Rabid: Yecch! You're brewing up spells again, aren't you! / Dr Quickly: For your information, I've finally solved magic and made a POTION. / Rabid: But last week you said magic was bogus and impossible! / Dr Quickly: That's why it was so hard! / Dr Quickly: Now here, drink this. / Rabish: I know, right? / Noel: Ha ha! / Rabid: AAAA / Rabid: AAAAAAA / Rabid: AAAAAAAAA / << SPLASH >> / Dr Quickly: HOORAY! It didn't fail to have an effect!! http://nameremoved.com/comics/735/

Botched Home Brewing (no regrets)	Rabid: Hey doc! How's the home brewing? Is it ready to try? / Rabid: Oh my goodness! / Rabid: You've spilled so much of it!! / Rabish: You started without me?! http://nameremoved.com/comics/736/
Hated New Character (S.C. Quickly)	Dr Quickly: So I'm loading everything into the rental truck we had to get because our own just broke down... / Dr Quickly: when I realized the kebabs weren't precooked and we're not bringing anything hot enough. / Dr Quickly: Rabid stays behind to cook them, and bring them with the second load (the rental's smaller) / Dr Quickly: We're already serving the weird appetizers when I finally hear from him. / Dr Quickly: 1. The kitchen caught fire from the kebabs, "somehow" / Dr Quickly: 2. The rental truck is wrapped around a pole in midtown. / Dr Quickly: 3. We're going to blow our upcoming health audit, because those appetizers are basically poison. / Dr Quickly: And then -- I see him! He somehow timed his arrival to the worst possible moment! / Noel: No! / Dr Quickly: Yes! My immensely more popular and successful evil twin, my nemesis, SPORTS CHAMP QUICKLY! / SC Quickly: Not a very good job of catering my party, bro! http://nameremoved.com/comics/737/
Hated New Character (the Political Cartoonist)	Rabid: Darn you, Space Frog! You'll pay for this, jerk! / Space Frog: HA HA / Space Frog: WHAT A GREAT PRANK / Rabid: RAAAA / Cartoonist: Gasp! Perfect! / Rabid: Huh? / Space Frog: WHAT / [[ Cartoonist puts a sign that says "LOCAL BUSINESS OWNER" on Rabid, a sign that says "EXTRASOLAR TAXATION" on Space Frog. ]] / [[ Cartoonist holds up a sign that says "INEVITABLE RESULT OF BILL 34C92 ON US FOLK" ]] / Cartoonist: My latest masterpiece! http://nameremoved.com/comics/738/
Hated New Character (a "mary sue")	Dr Quickly as Dumbledore: My dear friends, we have a new student today! Let us welcome her into her new life at Hogwarts! / Sorting Hat: Harry Potter's Girlfriend! / Rabid as Harry Potter: Cripes! These monsters are more powerful than me! / Mary Sue: Don't worry -- I know secret super-magic!! / Rabid: Wow! You really are the best girlfriend! / Dr Quickly: I will give you the spell but I cannot involve myself directly. / Noel as Snape: No, of course not. / Noel: DEMON! I have come to DESTROY YOU! / Rabid: P-professor! No!! / Mary Sue: Good luck, minor character... / Noel: Ceasus-desistus! / << META >> / Noel: I hope the "web forum" Dumbledore gave me will prove strong enough to hold the vile beast. http://nameremoved.com/comics/739/
Complicated Cellphone (ID4)	Noel: Ugh! Don't CALL him, you useless piece of infuriating CRAP! / Dr Quickly: Noel! Hey! I need to borrow your phone! / Dr Quickly: There! I'm using it to upload a virus into th'alien mothership's intranet! / Dr Quickly: Here you go! Thanks a bunch. http://nameremoved.com/comics/740/

Complicated Cellphone (there's an app for that)	Noel: You're lost? Well! / Rabid: That thing's got maps? / Noel: Okay -- so we're here... / Noel: And you're trying to get to Quickly's Coffee Gourd? / Rabot: ... the fu... / Rabish: There you are! / << WHUD >> / Rabid: Sorry I'm late -- I got lost! / Noel: Mister? Where'd you go? http://nameremoved.com/comics/741/
Complicated Cellphone (on vibrate)	Dr Quickly: CALL NOEL! / Noel: Who's fragging who NOW, dicknuts? / << bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt >> / << bzzt bzzt bzzt >> / << bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt bzzt >> / Noel: Whoa, fifteen new messages? / Rabid: Some sort of dimensional rift opened up and swallowed him and he said to call you and I don't know what to do please just pick up the phone come on please what am I supposed to do how can I do this pick up the phone COME ON / Rabid: PLEASE pick up. It's Rabid. Again. / Rabid: Okay, JERK. Now everything is probably ruined FOREVER and -- hang on... what's happening? / Dr Quickly: Hey, Noel. Thanks for NOT picking up -- your new phone vibrates at the exact frequency to re-open the crazy dimensional rift I got trapped in. So, uh, see you. / Rabid: ?! http://nameremoved.com/comics/742/
Rabish's Fortune (a fortune)	Rabish: Will I ever find true love? / Noel: HA HA HA HA ha ha ha ha... oh, my dear, that is NOT why YOU'RE here. / Rabish: Good, good -- so, why? / Noel: Get out your pen and paper. / Dr Quickly: Rabish, do you even know how the stock market WORKS? These trades make NO SENSE. / Dr Quickly: I can't, in good conscience, all-- / Rabish: Do your job, buster. / [[ Newspaper, FINANCIAL NEWS, headline: RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD -- A DAME?! ]] / Rabish: You're here for your cut of my fortune, eh? / Noel: This is more than we agreed on! / Rabish: Consider it a tip. / Noel: But usually there's an ironic comeuppance... / Rabish: I'm rich! Your powers work! I'm not stupid!! http://nameremoved.com/comics/743/
Rabish's Fortune (in the great outdoors)	Rabish: Will I ever find true love? / [[ Noel blushes. ]] / Noel: U-uh, yeah... while camping. / Rabish: Ooooh! / Rabid: Have a good time! / Rabish: I WILL! / Rabish: I didn't find true love, but... / Rabish: I grew as a person from the experience, so thanks! / Noel: sigh http://nameremoved.com/comics/744/
Rabish's Fortune (no regrets)	Rabish: Will I ever find true love? / Noel: Pff, I guess. I mean, YOU'D be happy with it. / Rabish: WHAT! / Rabid: You didn't hear what you wanted? / Rabish: No, this is my first "singles cruise" / Rabish: Oh, this room's my office! / Rabish: It's only the first dozen years of your conscious life! / Rabish and Husband: Congratulations! / Rabish: Do you ever... / Rabish: Nevermind http://nameremoved.com/comics/745/

Everybody's Pie (and it sounds GOOD)	Dr Quickly: A votre sante, Rabid, for you have become a delicious osso bucco pie. / Dr Quickly: Oh, Rabish! A lentil dal shepherd's pie! / Dr Quickly: Mmm, Space Frog -- so green and cheesy as a deep dish pesto pizza pie! / Dr Quickly: Noel, is it time for dessert? You are quite delectable cherry coffee chiffon pie. / Dr Quickly: Rabot, you scamp! Dark chocolate and spicy pecan brittle pie is JUST THE THING! / Dr Quickly: Here goes... http://nameremoved.com/comics/746/
Everybody's Pie (for a while)	Rabid: The bank's foreclosing on us! / Dr Quickly: Not to worry! / Dr Quickly: This device I invented will turn everyone on to pies! / Rabid: We'll be rich! / Airplane Captain: This is your captain speaking. Desperonto air control has gone silent, so we're being diverted to Monstreal. That's all I know. / << chug chug chug >> / << chug chug chug chug chug ch=CLUNK! >> / Dr Quickly: AAA! / Rabid: AAUGH!! / Raccoon: Ssss! http://nameremoved.com/comics/747/
Everybody's Pie (for the mill)	Suzie: Mmm, Mr Quickly, you make the BEST pies. / Dr Quickly: Well thank you, Suzie! Did you know they're METAPHORS? / Suzie: Gosh! / Dr Quickly: They used to be monsters like us, in a narrative framework. / Dr Quickly: But I turned them into symbols because comics are for LOSERS and EVERYBODY loves PIE! / Suzie: Wow! How did you do that? What do they represent? / Dr Quickly: The transience of mortal existence! I re-interpreted them with my grinder! http://nameremoved.com/comics/748/
Rabot and Tulip (Rabot hears a Who)	Rabot: My sensors detect miniscule life-forms upon this flower! / Rabot: I know you're real!! / [[ But there are gross little bug things on it. ]] / Rabot: EW!! / << toss! >> / Dr Quickly: You were in the shower for ages -- what's wrong? / Rabot: GASP! / Dr Quickly: Rabot? / [[ There are gross little bug things on Dr Quickly. ]] http://nameremoved.com/comics/749/
Rabot and Tulip (vs. the arts)	Rabot: What a beautiful flower! / Rabot: it has inspired me to create ART!! / [[ PLEIN-AIR PAINTING ]] / [[ DANCE ]] / [[ POETRY ]] / Rabot: I think that no-one ever drew up / a flower lovely as a tulip. / [[ CONCEPTUAL HAPPENING ]] / Dr Quickly: Honey, I'm homeaaAUGH!! / [[ SCULPTURE ]] / Rabish: Who's the WISE GUY what put a CONCRETE TULIP in the middle of the SIDEWALK?! / [[ CULINARY ]] / Rabid: These petals don't scoop much hummus... / [[ COMICS ]] http://nameremoved.com/comics/750/

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