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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 23 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / roman: / roman: I don't understand this idea of a Roman public bath. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / roman: We all just go there? Together? Naked? All the bits 'n pieces just...on display? / roman: I guess. I'm not that clear on this aspect of Roman life. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / roman: 'Cause you know, as a people, we've carved aqueducts and roads through MOUNTAINS! ...And you're tellin' me we can't invent the individual shower?? / roman: We wear table cloths for God's sake: There's somethin' about us that ain't right. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Your Roman history is falling apart a bit. / ARTHUR: They WERE table cloths! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100923.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 24 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / ARTHUR: When the Roman Empire fell, most technological advances just STOPPED. Europe stagnated in 1,000 years of "The Dark Ages." / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / ARTHUR: But imagine if Rome HADN'T fallen! Imagine all the scientific advances we could've seen in that time! By the 17th century, we could've had... / / [[Moon]] / Spaceship: / English Fop: Reginald! Eustace! Come, let us begin the garden party! / Reginald: eeOOoooo Dee-leesh-us! First, brandywine...then, croquet...then, a merry song! / Eustace: Delights! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100924.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 25 / 2010 | NARRATOR: On his 150th year as a Maker, he was again eligible to test for the Collegium. / / NARRATOR: He had failed in his 50th and 100th year: Too little command experience, too thin a grasp of the Theology, and most importantly...too few Spirits birthed. / / NARRATOR: But the intervening 50 years had been productive ones...and his Doctors were impressed. / / NARRATOR: So impressed that they advanced him on to the final stage: the "Test of Tests". / / NARRATOR: The posed question, the explained, was different for every candidate, and here was his: Birth a Spirit that could isolate and contain a SINGLE QUARK. / NARRATOR: ...and do it using only the meager materials provided. / NARRATOR: Do it within one week / NARRATOR: ...and without sustenance. / / NARRATOR: ...he immediately wished he hadn't skipped breakfast. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100925.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 27 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: I'm older than I am young, duck. And my time on this earth is short. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: I've gotta seize every moment! Carpe all my diems!...Pack my remaining days with living! Non-stop living! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: ...You flossed your teeth while on the john again, didn't you? / GRAMP: Non-stop livin'! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100927.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 28 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Book: / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: I don't understand the name "Nebraska Cornhuskers". / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Book: / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: I mean, that's basically food preparation, right? Husking corn? So...they named their team...after food preparation? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: What if other states did that? The "Louisiana Shrimp Peelers" or the "Maine Lobster Crackers" or the "Idaho Tater Peelers"...? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Book: / ARTHUR: BUHHH...I betcha $100 there's a high school somewhere called "The Tater Peelers" / GRAMP: Sir, I shall not take that wager. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100928.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 29 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Book: / GRAMP: Whoa...listen to this: Before they were called "Cornhuskers," Nebraska was called "The Bug Eaters." / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Good Lord...Seriously? Someone needs to pull Nebraska aside at a party and have a quiet chat. / GRAMP: What, you gonna try talking sense into someone who willingly called themselves "Bug Eaters"? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Someone has to! / GRAMP: Look, if you want this done...you gotta send someone Nebraska knows. Someone they can trust....A neighbor. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / United States map: / Wyoming: We've tried. / Colorado: We've ALL tried. / Texas: Truth be told...We tried secedin' just to get away from all y'all's nonsense. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100929.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 30 / 2010 | [[Home Depot]] / Bag: / cash register: / Counter: / Clerk: Thank you for shopping at Home Depot. / GRAMP: Oh no, my friend. This isn't goodbye. / / [[Home Depot]] / Clerk: What? / GRAMP: We'll be seeing each other countless times today. / / [[Home Depot]] / GRAMP: You see, I am working on a sink. Which means I will break two things for every one I fix. I will be missing a key tool toward the end. And I will buy the wrong parts twice before I get the rights ones. / / [[Home Depot]] / Bag: / cash register: / Counter: / Wallet: / Clerk: / GRAMP: So this isn't goodbye: this is the beginning of a relationship. / / [[Home Depot]] / cash register: / Counter: / Wallet: / Clerk: / / [[Home Depot]] / cash register: / Counter: / Wallet: / GRAMP: Forgot my wallet. / Clerk: Aaaaand we're off. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/100930.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 01 / 2010 | [[Home Depot]] / cash register: / Cashier: Back again so soon? / GRAMP: Yes...well...I got out to the parking lot and realized I MAY have bought the wrong-sized pipe fittings. / / [[Home Depot]] / GRAMP: I wrote the measurements on my hand, and they seem to have smudged.
/ ...Does this look like I wrote 1¼" or 1½"? / / [[Home Depot]] / cash register: / Cashier: It's...hard to tell amid the age spots and knuckle freckles. / GRAMP: Let's not make this weirder than it needs to be. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101001.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 02 / 2010 | NARRATOR: He could've spent and extra day on his design: Bringing more art to the Artefact, more spirituality to the Spirit. / / NARRATOR: But they told him he would get no food while he worked - and that just made him angry. / / NARRATOR: So, with more than a little spite, he finished the task and exited the test hall. / / NARRATOR: All within and hour. / / NARRATOR: ...he wanted a sandwich. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101002.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 04 / 2010 | [[Starbucks]] / GRAMP: I'd like a vanilla latte, please. / Barista: Comin' right up! / / [[Starbucks]] / Barista: / GRAMP: Epp pep pep… and I'd like it at 130 degrees, with almond milk instead of milk, vanilla syrup instead of powder… an in an extra-large cup, to make room for the foam. / / [[Starbucks]] / GRAMP: You know, I order that so much I'd have thought you guys would have a special name for- / / [[Starbucks]] / Barista: One "princess and the pea" in a big-boy cup! / GRAMP: hey. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101004.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 05 / 2010 | [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / cash register: / GRAMP: I notice you offer a "small" coffee. / Barista: We do, yes. Small, medium, and large. / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / GRAMP: But that's...that's for show, right? The small? No one ever says "Gimmie the smallest coffee you got" ...right?? / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / cash register: / Barista: / GRAMP: I mean, has anyone, in the history of your store, ever ordered a small coffee? / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / cash register: / GRAMP: / Barista: / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / cash register: / GRAMP: / Barista: / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Coffee Cup: / cash register: / GRAMP: / Barista: No http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101005.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 06 / 2010 | [[Bed]] / [[Bedroom]] / [[THE HOUSE (at night, Bedroom)]] / Bed: / Pillow: / Blanket: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: You have lived on this earth for decades, and gone to sleep just fine every night. / / [[THE HOUSE (at night, Bedroom)]] / [[Bedroom]] / Bed: / Pillow: / Blanket: / NARRATOR: But once in a while, when you roll over onto your side, you can't help but think: / GRAMP: WAIT. Where do I put... ...what do I do with these ARMS?? / / [[Bed]] / [[Bedroom]] / [[THE HOUSE (at night, Bedroom, night)]] / Bed: / Pillow: / Blanket: / NARRATOR: Honest-to-God: YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN. / GRAMP: ...where do they GO?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101006.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 07 / 2010 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Book: / ARTHUR: / OSO: hype hype hype hype hype hype hype hype / GRAMP: Guhhh! Don't you ever STOP barking? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: The only time he stops barking is when he's poopin' / GRAMP: WELL I WISH HE'D POOP ALL THE TIME, THEN! ALL THE TIME! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: ...Can't believe I just said that. / ARTHUR: Dog ownership leads to straaaange places. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101007.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 08 / 2010 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: / OSO: hype hype HYPE hype hype HYPE HYPE hype HYPE hype / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: / OSO: hype hype HYPE hype hype HYPE HYPE hype HYPE hype / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / Book: / GRAMP: NO! ...Not on the hallway rug! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101008.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 09 / 2010 | Orla O'Malley: Captain?
/ I'm sorry-
/ we have to...go. / Captain Taneel: "Go"??
/ We just got here, Orla. / / Orla O'Malley: It's a...um...full-fleet recall. The...SHIP is patching it through. / Captain Taneel: What? Why would the ship call YOU instead of ME? / / Orla O'Malley: Implant on the fritz, maybe? / Orla O'Malley: Apparently, the entire Familia has to return to earth, so I...
/ or rather WE need to / / Captain Taneel: ...get Fernando home. Got it. / Orla O'Malley: FerNANDO
/ -yes. / Orla O'Malley: Yes! Gotta get Fernando back. / Orla O'Malley: fernando. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101009.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 11 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Doe, a deer, a female deer! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Ray, a drop of golden sun! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Me, a name I call myself! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Far, a long long way to runnnnn! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / a patch of fabric: / Needle: / Thread: / ARTHUR: Sew, a needle pulling thread! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: / ARTHUR: La, a note to follow sew! / SHELDON: ...What? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Teacup: / ARTHUR: Tea, a drink with jam and bread! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: That will bring us back to do do do do / SHELDON: Wait wait wait go back. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101011.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 12 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: It's time to play spot where the lyricist kinda went off-track (Frank Sinatra edition) / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / iPod: / GRAMP: / Frank Sinatra: Chicago! Chicago! That toddling town / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / iPod: / GRAMP: / Frank Sinatra: On State Street! That great street I just wanna say… they do things they don't do on broadway! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / iPod: / GRAMP: / Frank Sinatra: They have the time, the time of their life: I saw a man, he danced with his wife. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / iPod: / Frank Sinatra: In Chicago! Chicago! My hometown! / GRAMP: …danced with his wife? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101012.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 13 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / - no prop -: / ARTHUR: NASA, I GOT THE ANSWER TO YOUR PROBLEM: HOW DO YOU SEND ASTRONAUTS TO MARS? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / - no prop -: / ARTHUR: I UNDERSTAND: YOU SEND ASTRONAUTS TO MARS, AND THEY'LL GO A LITTLE BONKERS WITH THE BOREDOM OVER THE 7-MONTH TRIP. SO HERE'S WHAT YOU DO. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Clock: / ARTHUR: FIRST, YOU GIVE THEM INTERNET ACCESS. THEN, YOU SET ALL THE SHIP'S CLOCKS PERMANENTLY TO 1:30 A.M. THEN, WATCH THE TIME-BENDING ABILITIES OF LATE-NIGHT INTERNET IN WASTING TIME. / / [[Spaceship]] / Computer: / Desk: / Astronaut 1: STEVE! WE MADE IT TO MARS! STEVE?? STEVE... LOOK OUTSIDE. / Astronaut 2: HOLD ON... STILL FIDDLIN' WITH MY FACEBOOK PROFILE. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101013.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 14 / 2010 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / rock: / FLACO: / ARTHUR: / worm: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / rock: / FLACO: / ARTHUR: / worm: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / rock: / ARTHUR: / FLACO: *slurp!* / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / rock: / FLACO: SLURRRP / ARTHUR: .....Really??
/ REALLY?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101014.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 15 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / sign: / SHELDON: Look at this word. / ARTHUR: ..."Eighth."? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / sign: / SHELDON: But LOOK at it. Really look at it. / ARTHUR: Eighth...eighth...eighth...it's ridiculous. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: It's totally ridiculous. How many H's do we need in there?? / ARTHUR: Well how are we supposed to spell it? Aith? Ayth? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: That's just it. English spelling rules are totally chaotic. / ARTHUR: It's like ten dudes orderin' toppings for one pizza: it's loud...messy...and everyone's bummed how it turned out. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101015.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 18 / 2010 | [[Living Room (In Gramp's chair)]] / Television: What would you doo-ooo-ooo... for a Klondike bar! / GRAMP: / / [[Living Room (In Gramp's chair)]] / Television: / GRAMP: / / [[Living Room (In Gramp's chair)]] / Television: / GRAMP: / / [[Conference room]] / graph: Klondike Sales / CEO: / Crowd: http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101018.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 19 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Coffee Cup: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: If you're a HARD-CORE coffee-drinker, you eventually run up against the worst possible moment / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Coffee Cup: / Second Coffee Cup: / NARRATOR: YESTERDAY'S left over coffee-with-cream, sitting next to TODAY'S coffee .... in identical mugs. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Coffee Cup: / Second Coffee Cup: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: They're the same temperature, the same color, and the same consistency. / ...but only one will taste like dung beetle / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Coffee Cup: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: ...Enjoy your possible dung beetle! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101019.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 20 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / SHELDON: Look at this word. / ARTHUR: ..."Eighth."? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / SHELDON: But LOOK at it. Really look at it. / ARTHUR: Eighth... Eighth... Eighth... -- it's ridiculous. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: It's totally ridiculous. How many H's do we need in there?? / ARTHUR: Well how are we supposed to spell it? Aith? Ayth? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: That's just it. English spelling rules are totally chaotic. / ARTHUR: It's like ten dudes orderin' toppings for one pizza: It's loud... messy... -- and everyone's bummed how it turned out. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101020.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 21 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: / NARRATOR: cause / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: / NARRATOR: draws / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: / NARRATOR: pause / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: / NARRATOR: flaws / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: / NARRATOR: gnaws http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101021.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 22 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / DANTE: flaws flaws flaws / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / DANTE: pause / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / DANTE: thaws / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / Pencil: / DANTE: draws http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101022.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 23 / 2010 | Fernando ('Nando): Nosh! We have to GO! / Nosh: ...what?
/ We are just arriving. / / Fernando ('Nando): No...it's...um.
/ We gotta GO-go. / Nosh: oh. OH.
/ ...Grandpapa has facilities, if you need. Veetans are not savages. / / Fernando ('Nando): No. It's...
/ We just...
/ We gotta... / Nosh: Is nothing to be ashaming of.
/ ...We are all biological being here. / / Fernando ('Nando): I have a ringing in my ear, Nosh. Do you know what that MEANS?? / Nosh: Ha! Yes! Means you waited to long!
/ ...We go! We go! / / Fernando ('Nando): I DON'T HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!! / The Pilot: Dang! Are humans always so weird about piddlin'? / Nosh's Grandfather: Yes. / Nosh: Yes. / Nosh's Grandfather: YES. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101023.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 25 / 2010 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: I have a concave section on my rum from sittin' up here - you know that? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: My butt... has developed a shape-memory of your scalp. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: it's Friennddshippp / GRAMP: stoppppp http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101025.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 26 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background) (no borders)]] / Cookie: / ARTHUR: / NARRATOR: / NARRATOR: Should I Have A Cookie? / Do you deserve a cookie?
/ *--> YES! --> But... am I lookin' a little chunky lately? #-->No! --> Ok... One cookie then --> Cookie
/ #--> A little -->No cookie for me, then --> ...after this one --> Cookie / *--> NO --> No cookie for me, then --> But now I can't shake this funk. I wanna cookie --> Cookie / *--> MAYBE --> Solution! I'll just eat 50% of the cookie --> 50% cookie --> But I can't just leave the rest out... 'cause... ants... right? --> Cookie / *--> Moot question. These cookies are going stale. ...Gotta finish them up. --> Ewwww... They're already stale. --> But still... cookie? --> Cookie! / ----> Second cookie http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101026.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 27 / 2010 | [[THE HOUSE (desk and stool)]] / Laptop: / FLACO: / NARRATOR: Pokes
/ Arthur has poked you / / [[THE HOUSE (desk and stool)]] / Laptop: / FLACO: / / [[THE HOUSE (desk and stool)]] / Laptop: / / [[THE HOUSE (desk and stool)]] / Laptop: / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Laptop: / FLACO: / ARTHUR: / (SOUND FX): BAP http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101027.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 28 / 2010 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Choco-Fudgies: / NARRATOR: How to secretly eat Halloween candy (...from a bag that hasn't been opened yet) / NARRATOR: 1. Cut a hole in the middle of the bag's seam (...under the flap!) / NARRATOR: 2. Make the hole TINY: Just wide enough to fit the width of the candy...not the length. / NARRATOR: 3. Do NOT abuse your new secret stash! Eating more than three makes the bag too light / NARRATOR: 4. (Note: No one is ever able to stop at three) / / Empty candy bag: / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: hey! HEY! / (SOUND FX): *flutter flutter* http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/101028.html |
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